Shackled
by Moonstruck Kitten
Summary: In a world where nothing is as it seems, Squall must deal with a forgotten past that leads to an uncertain future. When his family makes an appearance, things fall into chaos and Squall must fight to save everything he has ever loved. Destiny hasn't finished with the fated children. OC-centric, Squall/Rinoa centric; canon pairings. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

For so long my life's been sewn up tight inside your hold

_Centra, June 072 ALC, 11 Years Ago_

Red dots littered the horizon, standing out sharply amongst the muted yellows and blues in the sea of green. A sudden flash lit up the overcast sky, the field trembling in its wake; waves crashed heavily against weathered rock, the sound reverberating for miles on the open plain. Clouds, dark and heavy, rumbled ominously overhead, warning of the danger that was to come. The storm had only begun.

The tempest was the last thing on Nichole's mind as she tromped through the field, intent on the massive stone house that loomed in the distance. Her thoughts were elsewhere, occupied by the noise that had brought her outside into the rising storm in the first place. What was it? And why had it stopped?

A shadow stepped out from behind a tall stone column lining the orphanage's wraparound porch. Her heart quickened in surprise even as she scolded herself. "Hyne, why do you always do that, Squall?" she asked, stopping at the bottom step.

He ignored her, his cold eyes staring blankly over her head. He was obviously pissed about having to chase her, but she couldn't bring herself to apologize just yet. It wasn't her fault that he couldn't keep up with her, wasn't her fault that her keepers chose to follow her in the first place. She wasn't some child to be protected and coddled.

"He send you after me again?" she asked, the _he_ in question being her meddling, overprotective, yet somehow detached twin brother, Tobias. Tobias felt obligated to keep her 'out of trouble' but only so far as to send her cousin to do the actual herding.

"Yes." The one word was curt, and not inviting further conversation. He was in one of his moods, and she was happy to let him be.

It was expected after all; Squall Leonhart had been that way since before she'd arrived at the Centranian orphanage. Her roommate had even gone so far as to warn her away from him, stating that he was indifferent at best and downright cold any other time. Nichole hadn't listened though—especially not after he rescued her from one of the resident bullies—and had ended up with two constantly moody boys ruining her fun.

It had been two years since Nichole had arrived at the orphanage, she had been nine then, wounded and alone, knowing only her name. The orphanage staff had tried to counsel her, to trigger some sort of memory, but nothing had worked. She knew who she was, but couldn't say where she'd grown up, where she'd gone to school, couldn't answer any of the questions the adults had asked her.

The discovery of her birth documents had answered some of the questions and had held a surprise: Nichole had family there at the orphanage, a brother and a cousin. She'd already met Squall, but Tobias had been a mystery when Matron set up the introductions.

She had been so nervous, she hadn't known what to do with herself, and had stood still as a statue when the boy was led in. She remembered thinking that it was like looking into a mirror, and then he'd shaken her hand, saying "Nice to meet you."

She couldn't remember anything after that. "Stress induced collapse," the orphanage's doctor had said, but Nichole hadn't felt all that upset during the meeting. It was later when she realized that she could feel things—emotions—that definitely were not hers, that her stress began.

Tobias had the same issue, although it took them a while to puzzle out what was happening to them; they were feeling what the other was feeling. The knowledge was a relief, she wasn't crazy after all, but the situation was horrible… uncomfortable, embarrassing. Two nine-year-olds leaving behind childhood... strangers with no privacy. Awkward didn't even begin to describe it.

Her head whipped to the side, her thoughts of the past abandoned. The cry—the noise that drew her outside against Matron's orders—she'd sworn she'd heard it again. It was gone before she could decipher the direction, and she was left wondering if she'd really heard it at all.

The first time she'd heard it was at breakfast. She'd been in the dining hall, picking at her eggs, tuning out the conversations around her and trying to appear as small as possible to avoid the attention of her personal bully.

She'd barely heard the sound and had looked up, searching the room for what could possibly make such a pitiful noise. It had come again, and unable to locate it, she'd asked quietly if anyone else had heard it.

After receiving blank stares and strange looks she dropped the subject, huddling back down and hoping that the attention would soon be elsewhere. Most of the orphanage thought her a bit strange and pressing the issue wouldn't help matters.

A rumble shook the earth beneath her feet. If there was something out there it was about to have one hell of a bad day.

As if she willed it, the sound floated once more on the wind, stronger, more insistent, and finally having some direction to it. She turned and was moving before she knew it, running back through the field, worried that if she stopped even for a moment, she'd lose it again.

Footsteps pounded behind her and she put on a burst of speed in case he was trying to catch her. She didn't stop until she reached the harsh line of the cliffs where dark rock met gray skies. She waited, her heart pounding in her ears and her breath coming in small gasps, hoping that the sound would find her.

Catching the cry once more, she peeked over the edge of the abyss. Fear paralyzed her as her eyes met the angry waves below. She knew that the fall wasn't as far as it seemed—maybe fifteen or twenty feet—but to her heart and her stomach the distance seemed insurmountable.

Lightning flashed violently, lighting up the area like a beacon. Her eye caught and held on a bit of gray on the stone. She could just make out an animal huddled against the rock a few feet down from where she stood.

All of a sudden the clouds above her tore open and a torrent of big fat raindrops poured down. The pitiful windbreaker she wore was soaked through in seconds.

The animal cried woefully, curling in around itself. Swallowing a lump of cold fear she tossed all caution to the wind. She couldn't just leave the poor thing there. She dropped to her knees, and shimmied her way over the edge, ignoring the little voice that was screaming that this was her stupidest idea yet.

The cliffs were made of a mixture of sand and shale and could easily crumble, making them forbidden territory for the orphans. Matron's warnings sounded in her ears and visions of plummeting to her death swam in her head as she dropped all of her weight onto the small ledge. Grabbing a handhold, she looked down at the animal shivering pitifully against the stone and realized that she wasn't as close as she had hoped.

Unwilling to let go, she reached out with one hand, her fingertips just barely brushing against the wet mass of the animal's fur. She withdrew with a sigh—she hadn't expected rescuing the creature to be that hard.

A flash lit up the air around her as lightning struck the cliff face, spewing rock and sand. Thunder followed directly after, the noise deafening in proportion. Her body seized in terror, and her hand slipped, fumbling at empty air, her feet sliding on the wet stone. She was falling in a second that lasted forever, before her arms caught on the shelf.

Her heart stopped and her legs dangled uselessly towards the waves below. Panic blinded her while she floundered, trying to find some kind of anchor on the rock. Her arms ached and she wasn't sure how much longer she could hold on when she finally found purchase.

She scrambled back onto the ledge, breathing heavily "C-come on n-now," she crooned at the creature in a shaky voice. "I j-just need to p-pick you up and then we can find a way off this rock." She bent down, praying that it wouldn't bite her.

The animal, for all that it was small—perhaps the size of a small melon—was heavy, weighing more than she could lift with one hand in the awkward half bent posture she'd assumed. Reluctantly, she dropped her other hand and using both tugged the creature into her arms.

The poor thing was soaked through and as cold as ice, so she did the only thing she could think of and zipped it up in her jacket, hoping that her heat would work to keep it alive.

After a thorough search of the cliff side, she quickly came to the conclusion that she really _was_ insane. She had dropped herself over the edge of a cliff without knowing the way back up.

With the animal tucked into her jacket there was no way to climb up as she'd imagined, and she couldn't stomach the thought of just leaving it. With how heavy it was she couldn't hope to throw it high enough to get it to safety. So she was stuck. Tobias or Squall would surely realize she was missing and come after her... right?

She swore to Hyne that she would swallow every harsh word about her idiocy and recklessness, if someone, anyone, would just come rescue her.

Hot tears mixed with the cold rain trailing down her cheeks. She'd done everything they'd always accused her of and more. She'd gotten herself into trouble and had no way of getting herself out.

The wind picked up, pulling the downpour into horizontal lines against her. "Great going, you've really made a mess of it this time," she murmured, wiping at her stinging eyes.

Lightning struck the rock fifty feet to her right, turning her despair into full-blown terror. She held on for dear life as the thunder shook the earth around her.

Suddenly her name reached her on the wind.

"Over here! I need help! Please!" she screamed into the darkness, hope fluttering in her chest.

She held her breath and waited for an answer, for anything to indicate that what she'd heard was real.

Scrambling footsteps sent small pebbles over the edge a few feet from her.

"Help! I'm down here!" she yelled, waving her hand up as far as she could reach.

She cried out in alarm when a hand grabbed hers in the darkness. Still, she held on while it traveled down to grasp her forearm, and reached up to clench the other hand offered. The animal let out a mew of protest as it was scraped harshly against the rock, but thankfully kept its place inside her jacket while her rescuer helped her up the cliff side.

Beyond her feet she could see the angry waves crashing perilously close to her ledge. She squeezed her eyes shut, but the terrifying image was etched into her mind. Her rescuer tugged her over the edge, and she slumped onto the solid ground.

Still fighting back the nausea and fear, she couldn't muster the energy to open her eyes. Her body jolted as her rescuer lifted her into his arms. She tried to protest, but she wasn't able to do more than whimper.

By the time she heard the rapid ascent of the stairs she felt well enough to move again. Opening her eyes she realized she was close, way too close to her rescuer, and automatically shied away.

The next thing she knew she was on her butt with stars in her eyes. She glared up at the one who dared to drop her—conveniently forgetting her part in it—and had the breath knocked out of her.

It couldn't be… Her brain refused to wrap around what she was seeing. Not him, please, anyone but him. The mantra ran over and over in her head. She was seeing things, yes, that was it. She couldn't owe her life to… to… the Jerk!

He was glaring as usual, his eyes hard. She forced her mouth closed with some effort before he could get in a barb about her resemblance to a fish. Why did it have to be him? She'd take being stuck on the cliff rather than owe Adrian anything.

"My my… what have I caught here? The brat… away from her dogs? Now this is priceless." He gave her a calculating look.

"They aren't dogs." The denial was automatic.

He smiled cruelly. "Doesn't matter what they are. Or aren't. Matters what you were doing away from them. Went for a walk and lost your footing? Or did you get enough of them and decide to go walk off a cliff?"

"I would never… and it's none of your business what I was doing." She pulled the zipper of her jacket up a little, knowing that the Jerk hadn't noticed the animal yet, and hoping to keep it that way. Who knew what would happen if he knew about it? He could throw the poor thing back off the cliff in spite. Too late she realized the motion had drawn his attention.

She blushed a little at his proximity, too distracted to see his hand snap out, pulling her zipper down in one swift motion. The wet ball of fuzz tumbled out and onto the cold stone below, making a little sound of protest.

The Jerk grabbed the animal by the skin of its neck, dangling it before him. "A kitten, hmm?"

"Please don't hurt it," she cried, "Please? Please don't kill it."

He looked genuinely shocked by her words, but didn't release his grip. "I'm not hurting it. This is how you pick them up. Kittens may look harmless, but they have needle sharp teeth and claws. Hmmm…" He stated as he stared at her.

She wondered what he was talking about, but before she could ask she heard her name being called.

"Ooh, here come your dogs. Shall we play?" He grinned.

"No, just leave them out of this… Can I have it back?" She gestured to the kitten, still dangling precariously from his fingers.

"I guess, but you owe me." He thrust the kitten towards her.

She barely had her fingers around it when he let go, and she had to pitch forward to catch it. She didn't feel like she owed him anything, at least not regarding the kitten.

The rescue from the cliffs however... well, that was a different matter.

Making a split second decision, she stood. "Yes, I owe you. Now here's how I'm going to pay you back. Let's go now and I won't tell anyone you were here or that you actually managed to help someone besides yourself. Not even my family will know of it… Deal?"

"Sure, that'll do for starters," he agreed, leading the way around to the front door.

She held back a groan at the implication that her gesture wouldn't be enough to appease him. Owing him wouldn't be easy.

"You look a mess."

She sighed. Leave it to the Jerk to state the obvious. Of course she looked a mess; she'd been out in the rain with little protection for almost an hour. She was soaked through; her sneakers were leaving small puddles behind as she walked. She grit her teeth reminding herself that she owed him, and couldn't—in good conscience—scream at him.

They stopped at the racks that lined the front door and peeled off their wet shoes and socks. A thought struck her and her curiosity had her asking, "Why were you out by the cliffs?"

Adrian tossed her a suspicious look. "Matron had some announcement she wanted everyone there for, so she sent me to look for you."

"Why didn't she send Squall? He was behind me before I fell," she lied.

"He got pulled inside for being off the porch and got assigned to the breakfast dishes as punishment. She must not have seen you. I was sent. Deal with it."

"Fine," she bit out, knowing that to push further would lead to an argument. "What was the announcement about?"

"I don't know. I was looking for a while; she might have already announced it."

"What are we waiting for then? Let's go find out what it was." She turned, heading for the door, running smack dab into the girl coming out of it. As usual she bounced off, ending up on her rear.

She had this inexplicable penchant for running into people. Which was how she'd come to the Jerk's attention in the first place.

"Watch where you're going, dummy!" She recognized the girl's voice instantly, cringing at her bad luck. Not both of them, please, what had she ever done to deserve this? "Oh, it's _you_. My, my, what has that brother of mine been doing?"

Nichole almost gagged at the sickly sweet fake tone Anne, Adrian's sister, spoke in.

"Nothing like what you're thinking," Adrian commented cutting off Nichole's retort before it was formed. "What are you doing out here?"

"Just looking for you. I didn't see you at the announcement and wondered what trouble you were getting yourself into."

"Nothing I can't handle."

Anne rolled her eyes. "Sure, I so believe that."

Nichole sat back, completely willing to let the siblings bicker all day long, so long as the attention remained off of her.

"Seriously, what was the announcement?" the Jerk asked.

"Oh, Matron's closing down the orphanage, that's all."

It took all of Nichole's willpower to stay silent. Closing it down? Whatever could that mean? What would happen to her? What would happen to her family? Panic welled up at the thought of losing them. She didn't really appreciate their attempts to keep her out of trouble, but she loved them and couldn't bear the thought of them not being there.

"What do you mean she's closing it down?!" Adrian asked.

"You heard me. She's closing it and she said that we're leaving today. She said something about a change of dreams or something like that. You know, the normal Matron crap. The move has to be done a few days earlier than she expected so everyone's in a huge panic."

"So what are we supposed to do? Live in the wilderness?"

"No. Matron has it set up so that everyone is going to some program called Garden. We'll be educated there. It's supposed to be a nice setup, but who knows. There are three different Gardens and we'll get to choose which one we're going to. I chose Trabia, so you better be coming with me."

"Where are the others going? I mean, I'll choose Trabia, I'm just curious."

Anne just smiled evilly, and Nichole knew they wouldn't be hearing anything more from her.

"Oh come on, you might as well tell me, I'll find out anyway."

"You can just find out for yourself. Matron's looking for you."

"Thanks," he said sarcastically.

Nichole shared the sentiment as Anne sashayed back into the orphanage. Why now? Of all the things that could have happened, why this? She had never really expected to lose her home, at least not this soon.

"Come on, let's go." Adrian's irritated voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Go where?"

"To the Matron's office, we need to go figure out this Garden thing."

Scrambling to her feet, she followed him through the door and into the hall. Soon they were in the corridor of offices. Matron's office was the last in the row, the biggest and the most intimidating. No matter how many times Nichole had been in that room, she couldn't get over the feeling that she'd done something wrong to end up there.

"After you, brat." Adrian bowed before the door mockingly.

She entered cautiously, watching for him to trip her. She didn't think it was that likely with Matron sitting right there, but one never knew with the Jerk.

"Welcome, children. I'm so glad you found her."

"She was on the cliffs, Matron."

Nichole glared at him.

"And what, may I ask, were you doing on the cliffs?"

The kitten chose at that moment to make its presence known, letting out a cry as it peeked over Nichole's jacket. "I heard a noise this morning, Matron, and I went out looking for it. I fell down by this thing," she said, pointing at the kitten, "and next thing I knew he was there." She indicated the Jerk.

"I see. So you put not only your life at risk, but that of a friend. I'm very disappointed in you."

Friend was about the loosest term the Matron could use for Nichole's relationship with the Jerk, but she didn't argue the point. It didn't really matter.

Matron turned her attention to Adrian. "What were you doing outside in the storm? I told you to search the building and the porch."

"I did, Matron. I found her brother in the dining hall already so I couldn't ask him, but her cousin was in detention where you put him, and he told me the last time he'd seen her she was heading for the cliffs."

"So instead of getting an adult you decided to go play the hero. You could have killed not only her, but yourself as well. What do you have to say for yourself, young man?"

"I'm sorry?"

"You are both very lucky you are leaving this afternoon. You will however, not go unpunished. You are to ride at the back of the bus, separated from the rest of the children until you arrive at your new Garden. You'll find out which one you are both assigned to when you depart."

"I thought we were able to choose?" Adrian whined.

"You were able to choose not to go to the cliffs without an adult, and she was able to not be off the porch in the first place. If I can't trust you with simple decisions like these, why would I be able to trust you with important ones? You're dismissed. Go pack your bags." Matron looked back to Nichole. "I need to speak with you further."

The Jerk shot her a look of sympathy as he left, and she knew she must be in for it.

"Please shut the door. Thank you. Now down to business. What do you want to do with your prize?"

"My prize?"

"The animal in your arms. Do you wish to keep it, or do you wish me to find a home for it?"

"I—I can keep it!?"

"Of course, child. After you risked life and limb for such a creature it's not in my nature to take it from you, unless you don't want it. Having a cat is a large responsibility after all."

"N-No, no of course I want it. You mean you aren't mad? I really can keep it?"

"I am mad, but not in the way you think. I was worried about you, child. You are important to me, as is Adrian. I know that you two don't always get along, but I feel that if you try to understand each other you will become good friends. You need to have friends. I haven't seen you try to make another friend since Quistis was adopted last year."

"I'll try Matron. I really will." Nichole would promise the moon if it was asked of her.

"Good, good. I'll arrange it with where you are going so that you may keep it. You have packing to do. Go now, say your goodbyes."

"Thank you, Matron."

Nichole was halfway down the corridor before her brain started working properly again. The kitten stared up at her with its cloudy gray eyes as if to say 'what now?' She didn't know, and she didn't like not knowing. Tobias would probably know what to do. She reached through the link that bound them, searching for how he was feeling.

He was patient and calm, and for a moment she allowed his feelings to dominate her own. Feeling better, she headed in the direction of her room; he was probably waiting for her there.

After almost two years of working at it they had just gotten to the point where they could activate and deactivate the link at will. Although if the emotions were strong enough they would still leak through. Which was why Nichole thought her brother would have been the one to rescue her, even at that distance some of her terror would have surely transferred.

Nichole knew Tobias was praying for the day when they could shut it off altogether. She didn't mind it as much as he did, but she could see where he was coming from. Emotions were really best left to the person they belonged to. She benefited from his overall calm nature, but she was sure he was often annoyed with her, as her feelings tended to run the gambit.

Both Squall and Tobias were seated on her bed when she arrived, as far apart as possible of course, since neither of them much cared for the other. With the kitten curled in her arms she went to them and steeled herself for the explosion.

"What is that?" It wasn't the question she'd expected to fall from her brother's lips, so it took her a moment to gather her thoughts enough to answer.

"Well, the Jerk called it a kitten, but I've never seen one before. It's what I was hearing this morning. Matron said I could keep it."

"A kitten? That thing is a little big to be your average kitten. I can't believe Matron let you keep it, it's probably going to be huge when it's full grown." Tobias was always such a killjoy.

"What's its name?" Squall asked.

"I don't know, I haven't named it yet. What do you think its name should be?"

He thought for a moment. "How about Griever? You know, like the lion necklace I found on the beach? I think it suits."

Tobias shrugged. "Well, is it a boy or a girl?"

"She didn't know what it was; I doubt she'll know what gender it is. Here, let me see." Squall scooted off the bed, lifting the animal from her arms, picking up its tail. "It's officially a boy. I think Griever is a good name."

"Well, if it's a boy…" Tobias conceded.

"I guess I can't argue with your good judgment. Griever it is." She smiled at them, taking the now squirming kitten back into her arms. The clock struck the hour as she placed the kitten on the bed.

"Fifteen minutes," Tobias said. "We're down to fifteen more minutes in our home. How sad is that?"

Her heart sunk in her chest at the thought, knowing his did as well. Screw it, she thought, they were all going to get a little wet. She threw her arms around both boys, pulling them into a three-way hug. The boys—who would have fought her any other time—squeezed back.

"Come on, we'll help you pack." Squall was the first to pull away.

"Okay," she agreed, "but don't you guys have to pack too?"

"Already taken care of. He was the last." Tobias pointed at Squall.

She nodded, moving to her dresser while Squall grabbed a box supplied for the move. She threw everything in haphazardly, too tired to bother with sorting or folding. She looked around for anything she missed.

"Looks like we're ready, guys." Tobias sighed.

"Never, not if we're going to be split up," Squall added.

She suddenly knew that it was a very real possibility; she hadn't been able to choose. Knowing the boys, they had probably chosen the same, family was family in an orphan's world, like them or not. What was she going to do without them? The thought brought a desperate panic. "Don't talk like that, we'll always be together," she choked out through her tears.

Squall nodded, unwilling to speak more on the sad subject. Tobias hefted up her box as she picked up the now sleeping kitten. Nichole took one last look at her home before following her family out the door.

-oooOooo-

Later, as Nichole filed onto a bus, her head bowed under the weight of her sorrow, the Matron sighed.

She wondered if she would ever be forgiven for what she'd done. It was destined; the boy would go to Balamb and she could not change that no matter how much she wished otherwise.

She prayed that what she was doing was right, that the girl would overcome this loss—that the chosen child would become strong in her absence, as he would need to be. So much was resting on him. The fated children, her children, so lost and so loved; she would miss them.

-oooOooo-

**Disclaimer:** Final Fantasy 8, and all of its characters, dialogue, and settings belong to SquareEnix. The rest belongs to me.

The song _Shackled_ (of which the lyrics are used as chapter headings) belongs to the band Vertical Horizon and their affiliates.

**AN:** This story is complete and in the throes of final edits. Chapters should be coming out weekly.

Note: This story is rated mature for a reason and contains; language, violence, abuse, rape, character death, and very mild citrus. None of it is truly severe or distasteful but since its talked about, it should have a warning. Chapters with mature content will be marked individually with the rating at the top.

A gigantic crazy thank you to Kimmae for sticking with me through the process of editing and re-editing these chapters. This would not have been possible without her. Also a huge thanks to my husband who has supported me throughout. Special thanks to ZeroPanda who edited the beginnings of this story and Queen000 who added her two-cents into the first five chapters.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

And it leaves me there without a place to call my own

_Trabia Garden, Trabia, June 080 ALC, 2 years ago_

Small flakes of white flitted from a heavy blue sky, dancing their way joyously to the earth below. Sunlight streaked on the horizon, bathing everything in the still valley with its warm yellow glow. Morning had finally arrived in the cold winter wonderland known as Trabia.

Nichole Skye would never grow tired of watching the dawn herald in a new day in Trabia Garden. Sun or no sun, something about the turning of the hours between night and day seemed to bring hope. Hope that today would be better than the one before, that the world went on spinning, and everything—no matter how grim—would have to break for the passing of time.

"Meow." The sound startled her out of her thoughts and she giggled at her own foolishness.

"Finally out of bed are we? You lazy bum," she chided.

Griever—a wild cat the size of a mountain lion—simply looked at her indignantly before going about his daily routine of stretching and grooming. She did the same, dressing and pulling her waist-length hair into a high ponytail. Griever nudged her and she ran her hand through his charcoal gray fur, scratching behind his ears.

She remembered a time, not so long ago, when he was small enough to fit in her arms. Now she couldn't have lifted him if she tried. He'd grown so quickly from the kitten she'd rescued from certain death in Centra. Too quickly for her tastes. He would be off to hunt his breakfast soon, probably managing to scare a few students on his way.

"What are we going to do with you, Griever?"

The question was rhetorical; she knew she wouldn't do anything with him, but the staff had issued yet another warning about keeping 'that animal' contained.

Griever had become a point of contention almost the moment Nichole had arrived at Trabia Garden. The Headmaster had allowed the cat's presence, but it was the staff that ran the Garden, and none of them had any love for the creature. As he'd grown, so had the objections to him.

The cat rumbled out a purr, licking her hand before heading out through the motion-sensing door.

"What am I going to do?"

"Oh, I don't know, my lady, perhaps accompany this humble servant to break your fast?"

Her smile was automatic. "I don't know, Gavin, was that a suggestion or an invitation?"

Gavin Mortis chuckled. His dark sapphire eyes lit up under his severe brows, and his dark chocolate hair—always unruly—shook haphazardly along his angular cheekbones. She supposed he was handsome in a pretty boy sort of way, but to her, he was just Gavin.

When she had first met him, she'd been fifteen. He'd come across her sitting in a restricted classroom, feeling sorry for herself, and instead of assigning her detention like he should have, as a member of the disciplinary committee, he'd tried to comfort her. She still wasn't sure what he'd seen in her to have his pity override his duty, but she was grateful nonetheless.

A tentative friendship formed; one that developed slowly until they were nigh inseparable. Then, a revelation was made; Gavin had mentioned that he was adopted, and that his birth mother's last name had been Leonhart. Hearing that name had thrown Nichole back; back to the orphanage in Centra, to another Leonhart—her cousin, but most of all, her best friend.

She'd been torn from him when the orphanage had shut down, sent to Trabia while he was sent to… well, she wasn't actually sure where. Her twin brother, Tobias, probably knew but she'd been too upset to ask him. At fifteen, four years after leaving the orphanage, it was a moot point. Now, at nineteen, as much as she still missed her cousin she didn't allow herself to dwell on such matters. There was no sense in drudging up the past and contacting someone who probably had his own life, his own friends.

"Come, my lady, what say ye?" Gavin prompted, pulling her out of her melancholy thoughts.

"I suppose…" she conceded, "but only if you cut the 'my lady' crap."

"Ye wound me to the quick," he declared, clutching at his chest dramatically, "yet, as always, my lady's request is my command." He grinned, dropping the early Centranian to add, "Plus, I'm starving."

She rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh since it would only encourage him. He'd picked up the flowery prose to annoy her, but had kept it up because he thought it amused her. In truth it did, but it also grated on her nerves. He ignored her exasperated sigh, grabbed her arm and rushed her out of her dorm.

"You're always starved, now slow down!" She tugged her arm free from his grasp, slowing to a walk. "I don't want to run into anyone this morning."

"Aww, come on. You know the cafeteria is deserted at this time. We'll get the best pick of breakfast if we hurry."

"Fine," she agreed, picking up her speed a little, "but you're explaining it if I run into the Jerk. I think he has a homing device on me sometimes… 'Ooh! There she is now! If I just wait around this corner she'll be bound to run into me and then I can in—' Adrian!" She tried to backpedal but it was too late, and she smacked right into him.

She could barely hear Gavin's snickers over the blood pounding in her ears, while Adrian Sprite, the bane of her existence, extracted himself from her.

"Hyne, Nichole! Don't you ever watch where you're going? It's not as if it's hard or anything," the Jerk declared, running a hand through his golden brown hair. It fell back into place like it had never been disturbed and she sighed, her traitorous heart leaping. His beautiful face twisted into a sneer, his brilliant aquamarine eyes searching hers. "What are you looking at?"

Flustered and fighting down a blush she retorted, "Nothing much, why?" She knew she'd screwed up the moment she'd opened her mouth. She scrambled to think of something to say, something that wouldn't make her sound like more of an idiot, while praying for Gavin to step in.

It took a second but Gavin, her knight-in-Trabia's-student-uniform, finally came to her rescue. "Uh... Adrian! Good morning, we were just heading to breakfast, would you care to join us?"

"I was sent to come get you." Adrian turned his glare from Nichole to Gavin. "Everyone's already in the cafeteria. There are some things to discuss. Where's Tobias?"

"I don't know, he was supposed to be around this morning. Do you know where he is, my lady?"

"I'm not my brother's keeper. He comes and goes as he chooses. He rarely divulges where's he's at anymore. I think he has another girlfriend."

"Poor girl, must be loopy to want to date him," Adrian commented. Nichole was just about to point out that his sister, Anne, must have also been loopy given that she'd dated Tobias for about six months herself, but didn't get the chance as Adrian continued, "Come on, they're waiting for us, and your boyfriend has been driving us all up the wall. Tobias can just be briefed later."

"He's not my boyfriend," she huffed, crossing her arms in frustration.

Jeremiah Holden—the 'boyfriend' in question—was an endless source of fuel for Adrian's teasing, and had been since he'd first asked Nichole out. She had said no and kept saying no, but Jeremiah was not one to give up so easily. The attention he gave her was uncomfortable at best; he was a little aggressive in his methods and she couldn't see why he would want to be with her in the first place.

Beyond that, she couldn't see herself in the type of relationship he offered; it implied a sort of closeness that would force her to share things she didn't really want to share.

_Speak of the devil_, she thought, seeing the short stocky male. He was solidly built and not unattractive with clear blue eyes and sandy brown hair, he just wasn't comparable to… _No don't go there_, she chastised herself; that was a place that was definitely off limits.

"Nichole!"

She should have expected Jeremiah to be waiting outside of the cafeteria, after all, big bad Adrian had gone to fetch her. She prayed for Hyne to save her, and then winced at her less than kind thoughts.

"Nichole, are you okay?" Jeremiah asked, reaching out to her.

"She's just fine." Adrian stepped ahead of her, forcing Jeremiah away. "I didn't lay a hand on her. I can't account for what she laid on me, but that's another story."

Jeremiah's face twisted in rage and all of Nichole's gratitude for Adrian's intervention vanished. Trying to avoid the impending explosion, she stepped around the smirking Jerk, putting herself in between the two.

"Never mind him, Jeremiah," she said irritably. "What's all the excitement about?"

Jeremiah shook his head, plastering a fake-looking smile on his face. "I can't tell you. Anne's sworn me to secrecy."

Nichole sighed. "Then I guess we'll have to go to her."

-oooOooo-

If anyone had told Nichole ten years prior that Anne Sprite would turn out to be her best friend she would have been the first to sign them up for the loony bin. Six years and one hell of a trip spent lost together in the Trabian Tundra later, Nichole would be the first to admit that Anne was her best and only female friend.

Now if only being friends with Anne didn't have the unfortunate side effect of having to deal with Adrian... She giggled a little at the thought, ignoring the strange look she got from Gavin as she sat her breakfast tray down on the table next to his.

Anne looked just about ready to burst as she waitd for them to get settled. It wasn't unusual; she was generally hyped up about something or other. Exuberant, sarcastic, protective, flirty, all of those were words that could be used to describe Anne. Gorgeous was also applicable, and Anne would be the first to admit it.

"Have you heard? Have you heard?" Anne asked.

Gavin glanced up from spreading jam on his toast. "Heard what?"

"The news this morning, silly."

"Why don't you just tell them, honey?" Jason, Anne's boyfriend of a year and a half, pleaded.

"Oh, I _suppose_," she conceded. "Some Sorceress took over Galbadia a couple days ago. SeeD was deployed in an assassination attempt that failed and now they're being held in prison for treason! They're saying it's likely that the Sorceress will retaliate against the Gardens, so security is super tight everywhere. We were barely able to read the news before the terminal went down." "Yeah," Jason agreed, "we think they don't want to put Garden into a panic. I mean, a Sorceress with a vendetta against Garden? It's enough to give _anyone_ nightmares."

Nichole picked halfheartedly at her muffin. It sounded like some hyped-up political nonsense. Weren't Sorceresses supposed to be extinct?

Anne's mouth flattened into a grim line. "I feel sorry for those SeeDs. Even if they escape, what kind of welcome are they going to get back at Balamb after failing?"

Adrian laughed sardonically. "Oh, don't worry about that. They'll never escape."

"Why do you say that?" Jason asked.

"They were sent to D-District."

The infamy of the Galbadian prison was far-reaching. Smack dab in the middle of the Dingo Desert south of Galbadia's capital, the facility was rumored to be the best guarded prison in the world. Those that went in were often never heard from again.

Anne pouted. "Where'd you find that out?"

"I actually read the paper instead of skimming the headlines for gossip. They plan on 'questioning' the leader for information, and they've put out a bounty on one of the Sorceress' attackers that's still at large."

Gavin pushed away his empty plate. "You never know. They might just surprise us all and make it out of that hell-hole. Personally, I'm rooting for them. Balamb has been desperate for SeeDs lately. They haven't been receiving as many applicants as they used to, and those that do apply haven't been passing the tests.

"Everyone is more willing to go join some army than become a mercenary. That's why Balamb started that exchange program with us. We send them people who've passed all the requirements for the field exam and they're sending us those that want to stay with Garden but don't want to be SeeD."

"I've been thinking about that," Anne chimed in. "We should apply for the exchange. We've learned all that Trabia has to offer and I, for one, don't have anything better to do. It's getting boring around here now that we're graduating."

Adrian poked at his scrambled eggs. "I've already said we should move on. As I have no intention of joining some army, SeeD seems like the obvious solution."

Nichole shoved her half-eaten muffin away, wondering what Tobias would think. If he and Gavin both agreed to it she would follow along.

Gavin shrugged. "I don't see why not if everyone else is up to it. We can ask Tobias what he thinks when we see him."

"Sounds great! When are we going to sign up?" Jeremiah asked.

Adrian sneered. "Who said you're going?"

"Adrian! Be nice, Jerry can come if he wants," Anne chastised.

"Come on, Anne, the guy's a nuisance."

"You're just jealous."

Adrian threw his napkin on his tray. "I don't have to take this; I'm going to the gym."

Adrian stormed off, leaving Nichole to wonder just what he could be jealous of; he and Jeremiah were in two hugely separate leagues.

"Don't worry about him; he's always been an ass," Anne assured Jeremiah. "A lovable ass, but an ass all the same."

Jeremiah nodded but his attention was on Nichole. "Are you really going to transfer?"

"It seems so, unless Tobias protests, but I doubt he will."

"Would you care if I came along?"

"I don't think anyone would mind if you came, Jeremiah. I don't even think Adrian would. If you can stand him, he'll stand you just so he doesn't look bad."

"How do you know that?" he asked.

"I've known him for over a decade now—he's always been a jerk but even he has a good side."

Gavin laughed. "Yeah, an eensy beensy teensy weensy good side." He demonstrated just how small by holding his fingers together. "I know that and I even like the guy. Come on Nichole, you give him too much credit, he's never nice to you."

She glared at him, wanting to sink into the floor as she defended the Jerk to everyone. "So… He loves Anne, and that proves he has a heart buried in there somewhere... and he was nice to me once."

"Really? Methinks the lady doth protest too much," Gavin teased. She blushed, glaring as she stood.

"Oh, leave me alone. I'm late for my morning workout anyway. I'll catch you all later." She turned on her heel, leaving the group behind her, wondering what had possessed her to speak on the Jerk's behalf in the first place.

Gavin was right; Adrian was never nice to her. Except that once, on the long ride to their new Garden. He had been there, had tried his best to comfort her. It had been completely out of character for him and ever since she'd had the nagging feeling that she was wrong to dismiss him outright. Looking back, that was probably when she'd begun to see him as something besides her personal tormentor.

She reached the hall, ducking into an alcove that led to the pool in a roundabout way. She'd taken to using odd routes ever since Jeremiah had first shown interest in her. She wasn't sure if he'd try to follow her to her morning swim, but she was willing to go the extra mile to prevent it.

Jeremiah was an enigma. He seemed sweet enough when with the group, but without them he was... different. She couldn't pinpoint what it was exactly, but it was enough to set her nerves on edge. She avoided any and all situations she'd be alone with him as she would avoid being alone with a Snow Lion.

The pool was empty and the doors locked; not many were interested in swimming so early in the morning. She used the code granted to all graduates and stepped into the steamy chlorinated air. It was nice having the place to herself; she could swim without distraction, without the other students calling her names, whispering that she was a freak.

A label she earned rather honestly, as even in her own eyes she couldn't consider herself normal. Her hair was dark auburn, her eyes an amber just a little too vivid to pass for brown. Her looks, however, were truly dismissible. She wasn't ugly, but her features were plain enough that even with her slightly odd coloring she wouldn't have garnered much attention. No, it was what she hid that made her into the side-show she'd become.

Peeling off the leggings she was almost never without, she looked in revulsion at her secret, her shame—her scars. White and puckered, they crisscrossed her body, running from her shoulder blades to her ankles and back up the front of her legs. The physical reminder from a time that, try as she might, she couldn't remember. It was just one of the mysteries surrounding her when she'd been found on the steps of an orphanage in Centra. She'd been nine then; beaten, bloody, and knowing only her name.

From that time on she'd worn extra clothes to hide the marks, always keeping her shoulders and legs covered. It was an odd habit, even in the snows of Trabia; one that had set her apart from the other children. Mandy, Sandy, and Sophia, the three most popular girls in Trabia Garden, had taken a particular interest in her, demanding to know why she wasn't following the Garden code dictating uniform standards.

She hadn't bothered to answer them, and when pressured, had gotten nasty, making instant lifelong enemies of all three. It was the trinity that had stuck her with the label of 'freak', they who had started the campaign to remove Griever—the 'dangerous' animal—from the premises, and they who had made her life a living hell. The only good thing that had come of their malicious attacks had been that she'd met Gavin while hiding from them.

Of course after Nichole had found him, and he refused to be chased off by the trinity's disapproval, the girls had done their best to take him down with Nichole. Rumors began circulating around Garden that she and Gavin had been sleeping together before they'd discovered their familial connection; and had then continued even after the fact.

Nichole had taken the news rather hard, examining her feelings under a microscope, wondering if she'd done something to warrant the disgusted looks being sent her way. But, the truth of it was, while she loved Gavin unconditionally, she had never found him attractive.

Gavin, of course, was Gavin, and barely let the rumors faze him, other than saying it was an affront to his dignity. They were so far off the truth, he'd said, that it didn't matter and it didn't change their relationship one bit.

Nichole had become even more of a social pariah after the rumors had started, offset by the attention she'd started receiving from the male population. It was assumed that because she was sleeping with her cousin she must be an easy lay. That kind of insult was actually worse than the cruel barbs the females tossed at her.

Still, even with the hatred between Nichole and those girls, none of it had mattered in the long run. She had her family, her best friend Anne, and even Adrian could be counted on to back her up if things got too out of hand. For his part, he seemed to think that only he had the right to make her life miserable, and anyone else was encroaching on his territory.

Life was as good as could be expected. Better now that she had the pool to herself and had been able to trade in the full body wetsuit she'd worn for the cutest black bikini she could find.

She could even admit she looked good in it. Smiling, she turned away from the mirror. Traveling to the deepest end of the pool, she took a deep breath and dove in.

-oooOooo-

Still somewhat wet from his recent shower, Adrian was pulling on his pants when the evacuation alarms began screaming overhead. When the message '_this is just a drill, walk slowly and orderly to the nearest exit_,' didn't follow, fear seeped into his veins. Garden was the safest fortress in the surrounding fifteen hundred miles. What the fuck could be happening that had them sounding the alarms?

He pulled his shirt over his head and grabbed his coat, making sure that the locker room was clear. There hadn't been many students in the gym that morning, so it was easy to corral those present to nearest emergency exit.

His mind flashed from one scenario to another as he jogged towards the congregation of students and staff a little more than a mile away. Automatically he searched the crowd for Anne. He found her huddled under Jason's arm; Tobias, Gavin, and Jeremiah all hovering anxiously around them.

Something was wrong.

He could tell by her stance, even before he noticed the tears running down her face—saw that she wasn't the only one crying. All around him students stood with tears in their eyes. "Anne! Anne, what's happening? Why are you crying? Why is everyone crying?"

"Adrian!" she yelled, rushing to him, throwing her arms around his middle. "We thought you didn't hear the alarms. Where's Nichole? If the gym's PA was fixed, the pool's should've been too."

He hugged her to him, patting her back, trying to calm her frantic tears. "I don't know where she is. I assumed she was with you. What's going on? Why'd they sound the alarm?"

She pulled away from him. "Missiles! Five missiles are on a collision course with Garden. They're evacuating everyone they can, but some idiot fried the PA system and they've been fighting to get it back online. According to Garden intelligence, the missiles are due to hit in less than fifteen minutes and half the student body is still inside!"

"Who gives a shit about that?" Tobias growled. "Nichole is still in there and they aren't letting anyone go back."

Adrian was shocked for a couple of reasons. Reason number one, Tobias actually cared about what happened to his sister; number two, they all were just taking it, calling defeat before even trying.

Adrenaline kicked in as he calculated the odds of her survival if she were still in the water. It was slim to none at best, and looking around at all of the hopeless faces he knew they realized it too.

His mind was made up with barely a thought. "I'm going back. Stay here and keep Anne safe."

"But Adrian—" He ignored Jason's protest, starting at a run for the barricade.

A staff member attempted to block him but he dodged her easily, continuing toward Garden. Students and staff passed him as he ran, most giving him strange looks, some even calling out that he was going the wrong way.

His mind screamed that he was doing something beyond foolish, rushing back to meet what was sure to be his death, but his heart wasn't listening. He couldn't sit by while her life hung in the balance. As stupid as it was, he cared too much to not try—had cared for longer than he wanted to admit, even to himself.

His lungs burned and his muscles screamed in protest but he beat his best mile by a full minute, making it to the front gate in just under six point five. He ran through the halls, yelling at staff and students alike to leave—to get out while they still could. It was another three minutes before he reached the pool. Punching in his code he slammed the door open, scanning the water and calling her name.

He was relieved when he spotted her, but what she was wearing stopped him cold. She was doing laps in one of the smallest bikinis he'd ever seen. He wondered how the fabric even stayed on as she moved through the water. She wasn't exactly flat-chested—how the hell was her top managing to cover everything?

Realizing he was staring, he shook off his stupor long enough to rush to the side just as she approached. Grabbing her arm before she could be off again, he hauled her partially out of the water. She sputtered, almost unbalancing him as she jerked in fright.

"W-What!"

"Come on!" He pulled her out of the pool, thankful for her light frame as he dragged her towards the door.

"Adrian! What are you doing!" she yelled, trying to pry his fingers off her wrist.

He looked back at her to explain and stopped dead, feeling like someone had punched him in the gut. Hyne, her legs… they were covered in scars. They were all old and fading, but there were just so many. He could barely draw in a breath as he tore his gaze away from them, hoping she hadn't seen his horror.

"There's no time. We have to get out." He resumed dragging her. The door was so close now he could see freedom; if they could get out in the next twenty seconds they might just survive.

"What? Why!"

He didn't even spare her a look, just continued, wondering if carrying her would be quicker. "Missiles are heading this way, we have to go NOW!" he shouted, grabbing an arm full of towels from a rack before shoving his way through the door and into the hall.

They managed to get halfway to the closest emergency exit before the first missile hit. The sheer pressure of the impact sent him, Nichole, and everything that wasn't bolted down tumbling to the floor.

Nichole stumbled, trying to stand. "Griever! I have to get Griever!"

"No!" he yelled, clutching her before she could take off. "He's a smart cat; he'll find a way out. Your family is waiting for you, aren't they more important?"

For once he was glad that she was a klutz; if she was more coordinated, she'd have already been out of his reach. She nodded reluctantly as he helped her to her feet and together they ran.

His fingertips just brushed the door when the next shudder tore through Garden and their world started collapsing around them. Adrian tossed Nichole out into the snow, diving after her as the hall imploded behind them, falling upon itself like a house of cards and swallowing them in a cloud of debris.

His heart pounded, his blood pulsed in his ears as he scrambled up, yanking her along with him. Running as fast as they could, they made it less than a hundred yards before the third missile arrived with deafening clarity.

The shock wave of the impact sent shrapnel exploding out in all directions. The protection of the glowing ring floating above the massive metal structure flickered once before giving out entirely.

His ears were ringing, his mind felt clouded, but he pushed on, knowing that to stop now would be suicide. A shard of metal siding flew by them, ripping a bloody gash across Nichole's arm. Adrian swore under his breath at the close call but Nichole didn't even seem to notice; so focused was she on trying to keep up with him, to keep ahead of the wreckage.

He didn't see the metal support beam until it was too late, catching only a glimpse of its bulk out of the corner of his eye. Glancing at Nichole, he took what was sure to be his last breath when what he saw had him to pulling in another. She was glowing, her skin alight with an aura of sizzling silver-red power.

She overtook him, flicking her hand out and the joist seemed to simply bounce, flying off in another direction. She turned to him, their eyes meeting for one brief indescribable moment before the light vanished and she crumpled. He dove, catching her just before her face hit the snow. Lifting her into his arms he forgot everything except the need to run, to get them to safety.

The final missiles hit simultaneously, the blast of heat picking him up off of his feet and tossing him some fifteen yards. He twisted, landing first to protect the bundle in his arms, but the jolt of the collision tore her from him, dumping her into a drift. Pain stole his breath away and he closed his eyes before forcing them open again, he had to make sure she was alright. The cold shock woke her, and he watched in relief as she got up, glancing at him briefly before turning to watch the flames lashing out of the charred metal husk. He ignored the throbbing in his limbs, forcing them to boost him to his feet. Grabbing her hand he turned, heading for the safety of the barrier.

They didn't look back as they ran from the inferno that had once been their home.

-oooOooo-

Nichole stopped, completely out of breath a thousand feet from the makeshift camp. Collapsing into the snow, she giggled. It was funny, she was lying mostly naked in the middle of a snowfield and she couldn't feel a thing.

The rational part of her brain was shouting at her to get up, to get warm, because the lack of feeling indicated shock and probably hypothermia, but she couldn't bring herself to care. In truth she was grateful for the numbness. It was a blessing after what she'd just witnessed.

Adrian had plopped into the snow when she had, gasping harshly. She couldn't describe the adoration she felt for him in that moment. If she'd had the energy she would have kissed him.

"What are you doing?" he yelled. "Are you trying to freeze to death? Why didn't you tell me you were barefoot?"

She looked down in confusion. Her feet were raw and swollen from the cold, her toes a peculiar shade of grey that even her numb mind knew was bad. Blood was frozen in little rivers over her skin from the multitudes of cuts she'd received running through the scattered debris. Still, it made sense that she was barefoot, not even she was enough of a freak to swim in shoes. She turned to tell him so, when her world tilted.

He had pulled her into his lap, reaching around to feel her toes. She couldn't sense where he poked and prodded, but the contact still brought a blush to her cheeks. Seemingly satisfied, he cast a Cure on the frostbitten flesh, watching intently as the color slowly returned.

With color came feeling, and she was able to tell—for the first time since the heavy shock of being thrown into the snow—just how cold it was. She stood shakily, holding in a cry as the snow burned her healed skin. Adrian stood as well, wrapping one of the towels he had somehow managed to hold onto around her shoulders before helping her to wrap another around her legs. When they were secured, he swept an arm under her knees and lifted her off the ground. She squirmed but didn't protest, thankful for the break of contact between her feet and the ice.

"Help me out here; put your arms around my neck, will ya?" She complied, struggling to keep the towel over her shoulders at the same time. The adrenaline fled from her system bit by bit and she started to shiver violently after a few feet. She leaned into him, too tired to care if he minded, fighting to stay awake.

The smooth skin where his neck and shoulder joined was so comfortable, and the rhythm of his steps so soothing, she forgot why she needed to stay awake in the first place.

"Don't fall asleep," Adrian's voice rumbled in her ear, "the adrenaline kept you from feeling it before, but you're moderately hypothermic. You need to stay awake, it will keep you from going into shock."

She nodded clumsily, her head feeling heavy and somewhat disconnected.

Anne rushed out to meet them, throwing her arms around the two of them, while she cried, "Oh, Hyne! You did it! You got her out!" Anne stepped back. "Now Adrian Stephen Sprite, if you ever run off on me like that again I'll kill you myself!"

"Yes, ma'am." Adrian said, chagrined.

Nichole's limbs suddenly felt rather warm under the weight of the towels, and she reached to remove them .

"No. Leave them on," Adrian ordered, "any heat you feel is a trick your body is playing on you." She started to protest but at his glare she looked away and left them alone.

Gavin smiled at her and she attempted to return it but her mouth wouldn't work the way she wanted it to. "Dr. Crissun said to take her to the temporary headquarters. They aren't set up to handle something like her at the moment so you might have to take over," he said, addressing Adrian.

"What do you mean?" she asked, her words slurring. "I'm just fine. Just need to get these towels off, it's hot in here."

"Nichi, your lips are blue," Tobias spoke up. "You need to go with Adrian and listen to what he says."

She brought her fingers up to her lips trying to feel them, dropping them when she felt nothing at all. "Fine."

She felt Adrian sigh as Gavin led them to the tent that had been set up. There were a dozen or so cots, all of them occupied, with temporary screens between them for privacy.

Dr. Crissun, the infirmary head, ran to them as Gavin took his leave. "Oh, you poor dear," she sympathized. "Adrian, there's an SUV that's been heating up out back. We're a bit swamped here so you'll have to stay with her until we have a bed for her. It should only be about an hour or so. Christy is waiting with some clothes over there."

Nichole felt him nod before they moved off. Christy, a small trainee, helped her undress while Adrian held up a makeshift screen of towels.

"All done," Christy announced. Adrian turned back around, using one of the towels he held to gather up Nichole's damp hair before leading her outside.

The back of the waiting SUV had been cleared out and a sort of nest had been created using old canvas. She didn't protest as Adrian lifted her in and shut the door behind them. He tugged off his boots and jacket, getting as comfortable as he could before pulling her to him. She couldn't even find the energy to be embarrassed as he settled her back against his chest, circling her with his arms and legs to maximize contact. Pulling his coat over them both, he leaned back.

"I'm sorry. I used up my last Cure on your feet; we're going to have to get you warm the old fashioned way," he murmured. She nodded, her eyelids drooping in the haze of exhaustion. She tried vainly to keep them open, but it was as if lead weights had been attached to each one.

"Hey, Nichole?" Adrian asked suddenly, "What was that light out there?"

She couldn't figure out what he was talking about, "Huh? What light?"

"Umm, never mind." He sighed, his breath hot against her neck. "You can sleep now if you want. The car and my body heat should be enough to warm you. You'll be fine in no time."

Even with the shivering she fell asleep shortly thereafter, lulled by the rhythm of his heartbeat and the heat of his body.

-oooOooo-

She awoke an indeterminate amount of time later feeling pleasantly warm and comfortable. Moving the heavy material covering her, she sat up, wondering how she'd gotten into the medic tent.

The last thing she remembered she'd been curled up in Adrian's arms. A blush rose on her cheeks even as she dismissed the memory as some sort of hypothermia-induced dream. After all, a nice Adrian had to be some sort of illusion… but then recognition sparked through her.

His coat, his black, fur-lined, three quarter-length leather jacket, was draped over her legs. She vaguely remembered him pulling it over her before she'd passed out in the back of the SUV. It must not have been a dream after all. She wasn't sure what to think about that.

The tent was still crowded, overflowing with people in all sorts of disarray, but the mood was somber and the tones hushed. Pulling a worker aside, she briefly let him know that her bed was available before heading outside.

She pulled Adrian's jacket on, wrapping the excess around her, taking comfort in the warmth and the smell of him that clung to the fabric. She was mildly perturbed that his smell would be comforting to her, as he was very often the cause of her distress, but she shoved the feeling away, unnerved by its implications.

Students milled about, filing in and out of the four tents set up around the perimeter. They were lucky today; the temperature hovered around freezing, warm for the time of year, and there was little moisture in the air. The snowstorm they'd gotten early that morning had blown away and the sun shone warmly on the valley.

"Nichole!"

She turned at the sound of her name and had to fight for balance as Anne practically ran her over in excitement, pulling her into a hug. "Oh, I'm so glad you're okay!" Anne exclaimed. "I was so scared when Griever showed up without you..."

Nichole squeezed the shorter girl. "I'm fine, don't worry," she reassured her.

Anne pulled away, wiping at her tears with embarrassment. "Oh, look at me! What a mess." She sighed. "What happened? Didn't you hear the evacuation alarms? What _were_ you wearing?"

Nichole smiled at her, happy that at least one thing never changed. Anne would always be Anne.

"Oh, leave her alone, Anne, she just woke up," Adrian said from behind her.

Startled, she whipped around only to practically collide with him. "Steady now," he intoned, catching her by the shoulders. " You should still be in bed."

"I'm fine; there are other people that need it more than I do." _When in the hell did Adrian become so… nice?_

"You should let me be the judge of that." He took her hand in a very clinical manner, feeling for her pulse.

She looked away, turning three shades of red at the contact. Anne grinned madly at her, motioning to their joined hands and she knew that she'd never be able to live this down. Adrian was her enemy, her personal bully, and at the moment he was being so kind and caring she wondered if he had a double.

What was he thinking? Was it just concern that his form of entertainment was healthy enough to provide it? Or was his Healer training kicking in, making him use what little bedside manner he had? Either way, it unnerved her more than anything else.

"You should be okay. I want you in one of the tents for half an hour every hour, and keep that jacket wrapped around you."

She nodded, noticing that Gavin had joined their little group. Adrian stepped away and once more she was pulled into a bone-crushing hug.

"Please don't ever scare me like that again. I thought we'd lost you," Gavin whispered into her hair.

She nodded, tears running down her cheeks for the first time since the ordeal. With them came the reality of just how close she'd been to dying.

Adrian had rescued her, had risked his life to go back in and save hers. Had dragged her through the snow, not letting her give up, forcing her along when it would have been so much easier to just leave her. He could run much faster than she did, he would've been well away from the blasts.

"You should thank him," Gavin suggested. She nodded; she wasn't sure how Gavin could read her so easily but this time she was grateful.

Pulling away, she turned to look at her savior. Without the cold numbing her mind she could tell he was exhausted, weary, but still he stood strong. He was wearing a borrowed uniform jacket to replace his, and looked just as gorgeous and untouchable as usual. This time, however, she didn't care.

She walked to him, watching for his reaction. Confusion was the emotion most apparent and seeing the lack of anger, or worse yet, apathy, she smiled through her tears and launched herself at him, throwing her arms around his waist.

It took him a moment but slowly he returned her embrace. When she was calm enough that her words wouldn't slur she looked up at him. "Thank you… I… just thank you."

He nodded, looking uncomfortable, and she pulled away. She was too flustered to look back at him, missing his wide smile and the knowing look his sister threw him, while she greeted the newest arrival.

"Nichi. You're okay," Tobias stated, raising his hands awkwardly, a sign she knew meant he wasn't sure how to proceed.

Her brother was sometimes too controlled for his own damn good, she thought, as she took the decision away from him, wrapping her arms around him.

He sighed, returning her embrace. "I was worried about you."

She nodded, knowing that the words were the closest thing she'd ever get to an admission of caring. She loved her brother dearly, and knew that somewhere in there he loved her too, but he couldn't understand her. She messed up his otherwise controlled existence.

The thought was laughable, but it was the truth and she'd long ago learned to accept it and whatever affection he did have for her unconditionally. He pulled away first, smiling at her. "What were you wearing out there?"

She blushed. "Why does everyone want to know that?"

"Whatever it was, you made quite the sight running through the snow. We had to confiscate all of the binoculars," Gavin chimed in.

She shook her head, embarrassed at the thought of everyone seeing her in her bikini. Knowing that they probably weren't looking at her legs was the only thing that kept her from dying of shame right there on the spot. She swore if she ever went swimming again she was going to drag out that wetsuit, comfort be damned.

"Don't worry about it, " Adrian said, coming up behind her, "I doubt anyone saw anything."

She nodded, thankful for his words before realizing that he had seen _everything_. Her stomach dropped in horror.

"Attention!" The Headmaster's aide, Inez, called out. "Attention everyone! I have just received word from inside Garden. The Headmaster and a small group of students found refuge from the missiles in the lower levels. The Headmaster has given clearance for students and staff to return to Garden.

"Students with ID's ending in 9 are assigned to remain and watch over the junior classmen. Class C medics and above report for duty in the square immediately. Everyone else is assigned to search and salvage..." She paused, the bullhorn clicking off briefly.

"…We are going into a war zone. We all know what this means. If anyone is alive, bring them to the square or find someone who can. Please pray for our comrades who never made it out. That is all. Dismissed!"

Everything else was forgotten. Gavin and Anne sent her small sad smiles before turning and heading off to where the junior classmen were housed. Adrian left without a word, heading undoubtedly for the square where he would take part in the healing efforts. Tobias glanced at her before following him.

Alone in the glittering snow, she watched as the chaos of war began.

-oooOooo-

**AN**: Huge thanks to Kimmae for her awesome beta skills. Thanks to Queen000 and ZeroPanda for their help along the way. As always thanks to my husband for putting up with the time that this story ate out of my life.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

I know now what shadows can see...

_Balamb Garden, Ballroom, May 31, 082 ALC, Present Day, 19:35 Hours_

The last day of May arrived in splendor. Bright, clear, and sunny, it was a shining testament to the victory they had won. The endless storms of time compression had blown away. Good had triumphed over evil, and Balamb Garden began the long journey home.

At the end of the week the Garden's doors would open for the first time in over a year, welcoming the SeeDs of the future, but today… today was a commemoration of the present... and the past.

Squall Leonhart stood, hiding in the far corner of the darkened balcony, hoping that everyone would be distracted enough by the impromptu celebration to forget about him. There was only one person's company he wanted this night, and she was there, her alabaster arms resting gently against the stone railing while she gazed up at the stars.

Silence reigned between them but it was comfortable, warm even. She, content with her stargazing, and he lost in thoughts of the future. The Garden was going home.

Home… it sounded like such an abstract concept. After all, he was technically standing in his home. After everything that had happened it almost felt… anticlimactic. Like this couldn't just be the end of things.

When he'd said as much to Rinoa, she'd tittered at him. "It's not the end, silly, it's the beginning."

He had smiled at the thought and then the aftermath of Ultimecia's Sorceress War had taken front and center, effectively distracting him from his feelings.

The evil Sorceress, Ultimecia, had ruined more than a few lives with her quest to compress time, become a Goddess, and rule over everything. The possession of Sorceress Edea and the subsequent assassination of the Galbadian president; Seifer's influenced stint as Sorceress Edea's knight—Squall's good-natured rivalry turned deadly; Trabia Garden's destruction: all were attributed to Ultimecia's quest for Ellone, the child, now woman, who could send one's consciousness across the barrier of time.

Using Squall and his love for Rinoa, Ultimecia had achieved what she sought, compressing all time into one continuous stream. After fighting through the treacherous monster filled maze of Ultimecia's time-warped castle, Squall and his five comrades had finally confronted the witch. She had used everything she had, even calling upon her strongest Guardian, Griever, but Squall and his friends had claimed victory. When the power behind the unnatural compression died, the fabric of time began to unravel and Squall had lost his way amongst the deserts of the ages. Rinoa had found him, refused to let him go, and in the end, the hero was rescued by his maiden.

As time regained its natural flow, the ignorant people of Gaea sought out the heroes, demanding to know how such a thing could happen to their world. It had taken a month for the World Summit—a congregation of all the world's dignitaries—to rule on those involved in the disaster, but once the outcomes (which were mostly favorable) had been announced there was nothing for Balamb Garden to do but start the journey home.

The countries were already healing. It was time that the unsung heroes, the staff and students who were swept up in the maelstrom of war, found normality as well.

In a matter of hours Garden would come to rest on the Alcaud Plains of the island-continent Balamb. Once they landed, work would commence immediately to reconnect Garden to the world it left behind. Then they could get down to business.

The SeeD test was in its final stages of preparation. The contract had been signed, the down payment already deposited into SeeD's dwindled coffers. Still, there was so much to do, so much to plan for.

Rinoa's soft voice washed over him. "You're supposed to be enjoying yourself, not worrying."

He smiled, the barest upturn of his lips. "I am enjoying myself."

She shook her head, her eyes accusing even as her mouth twisted up. "You have your thinking frown on. Probably worrying about the SeeD test again."

Laughter bubbled up in his chest, spilling out, the sound foreign to his ears.

"I knew it!" she declared, an impish look on her face. "No more thinking of work. This is our night."

He nodded and she turned back to the stars. He watched her, wondering how this wisp of a girl had invaded his defenses so thoroughly that she knew his every thought. She was no great beauty, still too childish to be considered anything more than cute, but to him she was the most beautiful woman in the world.

Her spirit shone brighter than the moon. She had saved him, had tempered the raw hurt he'd carried since before he could remember. Provided a balm for his tumultuous thoughts, a reason to move beyond his shields and enjoy the world. In the short time that he had know her he had fallen, and fallen hard. She'd become his center.

He knew he didn't offer her enough in return. He still felt broken, like all the pieces of his life still didn't quite fit together in the way that they should. He'd expected the feeling to go away when he'd found his Sis, Ellone. When she had told him the story of his life, the reason he'd been abandoned, but it didn't. It had lessened substantially, but it lingered, making him doubt it would ever leave.

Rinoa looked up at him, smiling, her finger pointed into the sky as a star shot across the heavens. For a second the image of a night much like this one and an angel in white pointing delicately overhead overlapped his sight. She was as beautiful now as she had been then, but tonight he could give in to his urge to be with her.

Her smiled brightened as he pulled her into his arms and—as he'd of dreamed many times—brought her lips to his.

-oooOooo-

Quistis stood against a white marble wall observing the festivities in the ballroom. Everyone seemed to be in good spirits, celebrating the long-awaited end of the Sorceress War. Selphie had outdone herself, throwing together the informal bash within a week's time. Quistis had already been accosted by the tiny she-devil and her ever-suave cowboy, Irvine, earlier in the evening. After following along with their attempts to video-record the event and checking in on Zell, she'd taken the opportunity to slip away and out of the limelight.

She was truly enjoying the freedom and wondered if she should escape entirely. With the closing of the war the work was piling up faster than she could finish it.

Squall, their reluctant leader, had become the Garden's Commander during the height of the war and after, Headmaster Cid had made the position permanent. This re-split Garden's administration into two categories: the business, which the Headmaster oversaw— including the students and the curriculum—and the militaristic aspect.

The Commander was given control over the later, and as such, the elite mercenaries of SeeD were completely under Squall's jurisdiction. Squall had of course declined the promotion and the responsibility, but Cid wouldn't take no for an answer. Young blood was what Garden needed. It had always been built for the children and now it would be run by them.

With such a huge duty weighing down upon Squall, Cid had decided that the young Commander would need someone to help him, and to take the helm if he was ever unable to perform his duties. Thus Quistis had found herself promoted to Assistant Commander.

It was wonderful in one aspect: it showed that she'd redeemed herself from her failed instructor's position, but in another way it was the worst thing that could have happened to her. With the time and distance she'd maintained since the end of the War she had just begun to feel as if she was getting over her admittedly pathetic crush on the stoic hero. Rinoa, the beautiful Sorceress, had earned her knight, and Quistis was forever relegated to the role she'd chosen, the pretend big Sis.

A waltz started playing, pulling her attention to the dance floor, and she wished that someone would ask her to dance. She wanted to forget about everything for a moment and just be free. To feel like a giddy twenty-year old again, instead of a forty-year-old matron.

Irvine had asked her to dance earlier; maybe it was time to take him up on his offer. She searched for him, laughing a little about what his face would look like when she asked _him_ to dance. As much as he pretended to be a consummate lady's man, Irvine was just a big flirt. A woman making an attempt at him would probably send him running for the hills. A woman that wasn't named Selphie Tilmitt, that was.

She found him being tugged in the direction of the balcony by Selphie, camcorder still in hand. Curious, she followed the pair until she had a clear view of just what they found so enthralling. Rinoa was there, looking radiant in her blue battle attire, the white angel wings knitted into the fabric standing out vividly in the moonlight. She pointed above at a shooting star as Squall stepped into view. Smiling, he pulled Rinoa to him and their lips met in a passionate kiss.

Quistis stood frozen. Her heart screamed at her to move, to run, to back away from this exceedingly private moment. Pulling in air, she forced herself to turn before allowing her more primal urges to take over.

When she regained her senses she found herself standing in the darkened Quad, wondering why she'd ended up there instead of her office where she'd intended to go. Shrugging it off, she found her favorite bench, one that was hidden by the surrounding foliage, and sat. The soothing sound of the water fountain overwhelmed the pounding of her heart, and as its beat returned to normal she pondered her reaction.

It was painful to see them like that, to know that it would never be her that he would kiss, but it wasn't the sharp agony she'd expected. There was no anger… it was more embarrassment. Shame that she'd invaded such a delicate moment between them, and shame that it had the power to affect her after so much time and so much denial.

If only shame could stop the hurt.

Sometime later, tentative footsteps sounded across the stone walkway, and she turned to deal with the intruder. Zell stood at the little entrance to her hideaway, his blue eyes sympathetic, spelling out what he'd seen. She opened her mouth, to deny, to explain, but couldn't find the words. She knew he understood, perhaps better than anyone else ever could.

He'd been the only one she'd ever told of her pathetic little crush on their Commander. At the time she'd hadn't expected him to be able to keep the secret and some small part of her had wanted the recrimination such knowledge would bring from their little group. He'd surprised her though, going above and beyond keeping her secret. He'd become her friend. She'd come to love him, her brother in all but blood.

He sat next to her, touching her shoulder in a gesture of comfort, opening his arms for her. She fell into them, the tears that she'd never allowed herself to cry bubbling up, overwhelming her. He rubbed comforting circles on her back, holding her, soothing her without a sound. It felt strange to depend on someone else for comfort, someone she'd always seen as the younger, more immature party. It shed new light on the makeup of Zell, her heart adding a new layer to the love she held for him.

It was some time before she managed to compose herself, but she felt better for it.

"How did you know?" she asked, wiping away the last of her tears as she pulled away from his embrace.

"I was going to ask you to dance when you walked out. Just put two and two together after that. You're quite predictable, ya know."

"Good ol' predictable Quisty," she spat, sarcasm and self-loathing coloring her voice. She knew everyone in the gang thought of her as a doormat. To a certain degree she was, but it still rankled that they expected her to always be there for them, unchanging.

"Being labeled predictable is better than being labeled immature."

"I guess," she conceded, "but you should know that I don't think you're immature, at least not very often."

"You should know I don't find you predictable, at least not very often."

"Bullshit!"

"See, that's what I mean! Who knew that the proper instructor knew how to swear?"

"Well, fine then!" She crossed her arms in a huff that quickly faded as she noticed the serious expression on his tattooed face.

"So… want me to beat him up for you? I mean, I kinda like the guy, but anyone that can make you cry deserves a little punishment."

She laughed as the picture of Zell beating up Squall flitted through her mind, "Oh, Hyne, no! It wasn't even him I was crying over. I've actually been over him for quite some time. It's just what he represented, a fantasy. One that's been dispelled quite thoroughly, so really, no more worries."

"If you say so," he acquiesced, still looking skeptical. "I still say he deserves it though."

She smiled, and changed the subject. "So how'd things go with your girl tonight?" She was curious after all; she knew how things had ended: the library girl had run off after a rather comical choking incident, but what had happened before that was a mystery.

"Great! She agreed to go on a date with me!" he announced, his eyes shining with happiness, before his face fell. "Hyne, I hope she still goes after the scene I made," he mumbled.

"I'm sure she will. She looked completely enthralled when you were stuffing your face with hotdogs, and anybody that can have a look of adoration on their face at _that_ disgusting display has got to be in love."

"You think so... HEY!" he yelled, noticing the veiled insult, before laughing it off. "Fine… fine, be that way. Anyway, I thought you looked like you wanted to dance earlier but I actually had an ulterior motive."

Before they had become friends, she wouldn't have believed Zell even knew what ulterior meant; now she just giggled. "Of course you did, so what did you want?"

"I heard you had the scoop on the new transfers coming in."

She did. She had the files sitting on her desk waiting for the last stamp of approval before the arrangements to transport them all to Garden were set. "Yeah, there's about thirty: five from Trabia, twenty from Galbadia, and three from Balamb Harbor. I don't know names or anything, and I've only skimmed through the applicants, but everyone seems up to SeeD standards; this might be a record recruiting year."

"I'm not surprised. With the war and everything, a lot of people are going to be thinking of joining, looking for a piece of the glory we've won," Zell's said. "I hope you're prepared for fame mongers."

She nodded. "Most of the applicants that were accepted applied before our victory, some even before the war started in earnest. But we'll be keeping an eye on the ones who submitted their papers after."

"Good… Well, I'm turning in. I'm supposed to be heading up that mission that goes out tomorrow to clean up Esthar City. Want me to walk you to your dorm?" he asked, rising.

"No, I need to grab some papers off my desk before I turn in. I'll probably see you before you head out tomorrow, but if I don't... good luck on your first mission as lead. I know you'll do great!"

He nodded and smiled, leaving her with her thoughts and the gentle sound of flowing water that made Balamb Garden the essence of tranquility. The next week would be busy for them all.

-oooOooo-

**AN:** There you have it, the short bridge between past and present. We are now post-game and present day. I'm kinda sad here; no reviews yet. I'm not sure if it's due to lack of interest or what.

Thanks as always to Kimmae, the hubby, Queen000, and ZeroPanda.

**Disclaimer:** In case one isn't enough. I do not own the names, likenesses, content, or ideas presented in the game _Final Fantasy 8_. All rights go to _SquareEnix_(formerly _Squaresoft_). All unrecognizable ideas, characters, and content belongs to me.

Lyrics to the song _Shackled_, belong to the band _Vertical Horizon_ and their affiliates.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

There's no point in running 'less you run with me

_Balamb Harbor, Balamb, June 7, 082 ALC, 12:00 Hours_

The sun beat down on the harbor. Gulls circled in the still air, diving for scraps tossed into the water by the fishermen going about their daily routines. The shrill whistle of the sleek train pierced the air, briefly interrupting the everyday rhythm of life at the sea. The engine clanked along, coming to a grinding halt in the station with a hiss of steam.

Her patience hung by a thread as she lugged her belongings off the train and into the harsh Balamb sun. The last leg of their journey had been long, boring, and ultimately aggravating. The air-conditioning had been broken in their economy class car, and between that and a stunt the Jerk pulled, she was wet, sweaty, and cranky. Her Trabia student uniform clung disgustingly to her skin and she wished for the umpteenth time that she'd thought to pack something besides the heavy Garden-issue clothing.

"Nichole, seriously, it wasn't that bad." Her brother, the interfering idiot, added for the fourth time, dropping his bags.

She counted silently to ten, trying to reign in her temper. "I can't believe you're taking his side on this!" She seethed. "Let's see how bad _you_ think it is!"

"Wait! I didn't mean it!" he pleaded. "Adrian, just apologize to her already, would you?"

"Don't bring me into this one," Adrian called from a safe distance away. "_You're_ the one that stuck your foot in. You can dig yourself out."

Tobias huffed. "See if I ever defend you again."

"You thought it was a grand joke. Don't pretend to be doing me any favors. You know she deserved it, whining about the heat." Adrian scoffed.

Nichole ground her teeth, praying for sanity. "I was not whining," she bit out, "I said it once and _only_ once. You just had to take it too far." She wanted to scream at him but knew it wouldn't do any good; he'd be happy if she embarrassed herself by making a scene and she refused to give him the satisfaction.

"You were complaining like a freaking harpy about the heat to anyone and everyone that would listen. Is it always so hot here?" he whined, exaggerating his voice in a poor attempt to imitate her. "How hot does it get? I wish I packed summer clothes…"

The last vestiges of control evaporated completely under the weight of his barbs. "You are such a jerk!" she screamed, lunging at him, wanting to sink her nails into his face.

Gavin caught her by the shoulders, meeting her questioning gaze with a slight shake of the head, and nodding almost imperceptibly behind her. She turned in his grasp and found a man standing where she'd started her mini-rampage.

He was dressed casually in long jean shorts and a black shirt, covered with a short leather jacket. Most of his medium length hair blonde hair was swept back away from his handsome face, but his bangs were fashioned into some kind of cowlick. A black tattoo contrasted against his peach skin, outlining his left cheek from forehead to chin, emphasizing his features and highlighting his steel blue eyes. He was tugging on his ear—the one closest to where she'd shrieked—subtly trying to get his hearing back.

"Ummm… Hello?" she said, her cheeks heating. She twisted, glaring at a widely grinning Adrian. Her eyes narrowed; the Jerk had known the man was there all along. She tried to pull out of Gavin's grasp, wanting nothing more than to violently wipe the smug look off of Adrian's face, but he held fast, his fingers digging into her shoulders.

"So you're the transfers from Trabia, right?" the man asked.

She glanced at him. "Yes, we've just arrived."

He smiled, and while the gesture was friendly enough, it morphed his features into something vaguely feral. "Well, welcome to Balamb. This here is Balamb Harbor, the capital of this fine country. My name's Zell Dincht, SeeD Rank A. It's a pleasure to meet'cha." He held out his hand and she shook it.

Unobtrusively rubbing the circulation back into her fingers, she smiled. "Nice to meet you. I'm Nichole Skye, Trabia Garden, Student Class B."

Griever chose that moment to remind everyone of his presence, letting out a growling yawn, displaying his dagger-like canines. Nichole groaned inwardly. Of course the cat just couldn't sit there and look demure. He had to remind everyone of the deadly risk that he presented. "Umm… this is Griever, he's… well, I guess you could say my pet."

Zell looked warily at the now mostly concealed fangs and she knew he was thinking just how quickly teeth like that could kill a man. The question he asked, however, was not the one she'd expected. "Umm… Griever?"

Relieved that he wasn't asking about just how tame her 'pet' was she answered. "Yeah, my cousin named him when we were little."

Zell nodded, saying nothing and she fidgeted, wondering if Headmaster Dascal had been wrong about Balamb Garden's willingness to house her friend. She glanced at Gavin, hoping for some kind of direction, for him to break the silence. When nothing seemed to be forthcoming, she sighed.

"Since my companions seem to have lost their voices… This is Gavin Mortis, Trabia Garden, Student Class A, and over there is Tobias Skye and Anne Sprite, also Student Class A." She pointed to each in turn, ignoring Adrian on purpose, taking childish delight in the snub.

Adrian glared at her, moving from his spot of safety behind Gavin. "I'm Adrian Sprite. Student Class A."

Zell whistled, "Man, whatever you did, you're deep in the doghouse now."

Adrian sniffed. "I hadn't noticed."

Nichole ignored him. "Never mind him. Where are we going now?"

"Wha…? Oh, yeah. I'm here to getcha to the SeeD test. Come on, I almost forgot! _Man_! We're gonna be so late!" Zell picked up the largest of Nichole's bags like it was nothing before sprinting over to do the same for Anne. "Gotta book it!"

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Garden, __Balamb, __June 7, 082 ALC__, 12:10__ Hours_

The slight breeze coming in off the mountains died, bringing an unsettling quiet to the choking heat around Balamb Garden. The deep humming of the power ring provided a soothing backdrop to the otherwise silent office where Quistis sat behind her mahogany desk. Sunshine streamed through the blue-tinted windows behind her, casting a pleasant glow on the small, thankfully air-conditioned room.

Oh, how she wished she could be out enjoying the day. She would have even traded Zell for his delivery duty of the SeeD hopefuls from Trabia if it meant she'd get a break from her desk. Participating in the SeeD field exam—even just as an impartial observer—was sure to be more interesting than sorting through the seemingly endless piles of papers said exam generated. And she would do almost anything to get away from the man currently shut up in his office.

She must have been insane to think she'd be able to work under him. It would have been so much easier if she could just avoid him, pretend that the whole embarrassing phase of her life had never happened. Instead she was forced to interact with him, to prod him about his paperwork, to remind him of his meetings. It had become her own personal hell, especially after he'd fallen into a dark sulk that even Rinoa couldn't counter.

Quistis wondered if his mood had anything to do with the special examinee Cid had sprung upon them last minute, but knew better than to ask. She had more than enough on her plate without getting involved in Squall's childish brooding.

The new ruling force behind Garden, the Garden Committee, had decided that there was no better time than the present to test out a somewhat controversial new battle system—designed by none other than Dr. Odine. The old kook had taken a shine to Squall sometime during the craziness of the War and had designed the system specifically with the saviors of the world in mind. It was promised to be a SeeD exclusive technology that would remove their dependence on the Guardian Forces altogether.

Based on the essence of the GF, the new system allowed all known Para-magic spells to be cast without the necessity of having a GF equipped. It was an unprecedented breakthrough that most saw as a great step in the right direction. The GF Essence Junction, or EsJ as it had come to be called, was in its final testing stages, ready to be used by the masses, and today would mark the initiation of the system within Balamb.

For all the hype and all of the paperwork it was generating, the exam itself was to be rather simple this year, much more docile then the battle for Dollet two years prior. The mission was to clear out a nest of monsters that had migrated to Mount Alta after the Lunar Cry. A high class resort on the edge of the monsters' new habitat had suffered attacks on its patrons and the resort was more than happy to pay the exorbitant fee for SeeD to eradicate their problem.

She finished sorting the last document and stood, absently rubbing her rear. She needed a new chair; the one she'd been given just had to go. Taking the papers that needed the Commander's signature, she headed for his office, entertaining herself with a plan to sneak her old chair out of the classroom she'd once commanded.

She knocked once as protocol demanded and receiving no answer, entered. Rinoa was there again—which was no great surprise—but what she was doing had Quistis' eyes widening in shock.

Though he was still fully covered, Squall seemed rather naked without the fur-lined jacket and leather gloves that were in a heap at his feet. Rinoa had him backed into a filing cabinet with her hands wavering between undoing his belt and just ignoring it entirely, shoving her fingers down the space between while kissing every bit of exposed skin that she could find.

Quistis would have backed out, as neither party had noticed her yet, if it hadn't been for the look of appalled horror adorning Squall's generally stoic face as he tried to guide Rinoa's hands back up to safer regions.

Taking pity on the obviously uncomfortable man, she cleared her throat. "Oh… excuse me, Commander. I didn't know you were busy…" She bit her lip, working to hold in her laughter, as a blush darkened his cheeks.

Rinoa turned, glaring with pure rage in her eyes. "Well, he _is_," she snapped snidely. Quistis was dumbfounded by the girl's reaction. She'd expected some form of embarrassment, not animosity. She searched her memories, wondering if she'd done anything in the past week to piss the otherwise cheerful girl off. Since the attack on Galbadia Garden she'd gone out of her way to remain on good terms with the new Sorceress. She'd even begun to like the girl. So what had her so angry now? Why was Rinoa treating her like a rival, rather than the friend she'd become?

Before she could say anything, Squall spoke up. "Rinoa was just leaving," he said to Quistis before looking back to Rinoa. "You were going to go see Selphie, Noa, remember? She won't be here very long; the mission is going to begin within the hour. I'll finish these and I'll come get you." He indicated the stack of papers still clutched tightly in his hand.

The rage that Quistis had been privy to melted as Rinoa turned to him. "Of course, my Lion, just don't take too long." She pulled him down to meet her in a deep kiss before turning, giving Quistis another cold look, and flitting out of the door.

_My Lion?_ Quistis wondered. _What __a stupid endearment._ Since when had Rinoa called Squall that? Squall blushed and Quistis just couldn't resist the opportunity to tease him. After all, how many chances would she have to see Squall so vulnerable?

"Well, now, Commander, the least you could do—if you're going to do that during office hours—is lock the door. What if it had been a student?"

She held back a laugh, thinking that to laugh at him would be just a tad bit cruel, as the color completely drained from him. She bit her lip while he gaped like a fish, unable to form the words to defend himself.

Dumping the pile of papers she carried into his already full inbox, she turned on her heel and left without another word. She managed to get halfway to her door before peals of laughter overwhelmed her. Rushing into her office she laughed until she cried.

The angel—as Rinoa had been dubbed—was going to get a firm talking to at the end of the day. Squall lived by the Garden code of conduct and Rinoa had just embarrassed him in front of a high-ranking official. It wouldn't matter to him that Quistis was a glorified secretary; she had the title, and command if he was ever unable to do so.

She almost felt sorry for Rinoa. Especially since the incident hadn't brought the twinge of hurt or jealousy she'd expected. Rinoa's reaction had also been surprising. Rinoa had been careful to hide her malice from Squall but the hate she had directed Quistis' way was simply startling. Even when Quistis hadn't been kind to Rinoa, she'd never received that kind of a response from her. Why now, when she'd finally given up her feelings for Squall, did Rinoa choose to hate her?

She didn't have time to ponder the mystery. There were still piles of work to be done, and the ball to plan—thankfully the Garden Committee had agreed to postpone the event for a full week to give them more time. Sighing, she stretched. Sitting back in her uncomfortable chair, she pulled the next item on her agenda towards her.

-oooOooo-

_Mount Alta Resort, Balamb, June 7, 082 ALC, 14:12 Hours_

"Nichole! Watch out!"

Nichole ducked as another huge blue bug with sharp teeth went flying over her head. Crossing her right arm over her chest, she gathered her magic to her and flung a Blizzard at the retreating Bite Bug. A large chunk of ice slammed into it, and the bug jerked once before landing in a heap of half-frozen guts.

Another one bites the dust.

They'd been at it for hours. She was covered head to toe in sweat, dirt, and random monster innards. She would quite happily kill for a shower, and the sooner the better. Fighting under the hot Balamb sun in a Trabia Garden student uniform was enough to make the most even-tempered lose it.

She hadn't expected it to be this bad when she'd arrived at the top of the mountain. It had been twenty degrees cooler and she'd thanked Hyne for small favors as a portly older man greeted the assembly. Introducing himself as Headmaster Kramer—or Headmaster Cid, as he'd said they could call him—he'd promptly launched into a long speech about glory and honor, that she was ashamed to say she'd mostly tuned out.

She'd heard that there was a large showing this year due to the war, but she'd never expected the amount of people present. There were almost thirty examinees in various student uniforms, and that wasn't counting the twenty-five that, like Zell, stood around in common clothes. Knowing that Zell was a SeeD, she assumed some of the others were as well, but still it was quite the turnout. In the past five years of the SeeD exam the average graduating students numbered four out of fifteen applicants, and there were probably three times that there.

When she'd caught that their directive was simply to clear the mountain of its monster infestation, she'd dismissed the test as child's play, even after she learned that they all were to be test subjects for a new junction system.

She was almost relieved to hear they wouldn't be required to use the GFs. The memory loss she already suffered was more than enough. Besides, the new system seemed quite similar to the one used at Trabia. There were more spell options and the EsJ was junctioned to the mind—rather than the talisman they had worn at Trabia.

She was assigned to Squad C with Gavin, and surprisingly enough, Zell, while the other members of her group formed Squad D. Her group was then given an area known to contain at least three nests of her least favorite monster, Bite Bugs. They were just so… creepy, with their long mouths of razor sharp teeth and their penchant for human blood. Just thinking about them sent chills down her spine.

Shortly after they'd finished flushing out the second nest of monsters, Zell had sent Gavin over to assist Squad D with a pair of T-Rexaurs that had popped up in their midst. Zell wasn't allowed to do much more than warn her of impending attacks, so she was left to clean up the third nest on her own.

Another bug turned in the air, acrid drool dripping out of its open mouth. Knowing she didn't have time to ready a spell, she swung at the creature with her quarter-staff, knocking it to the ground. Flipping the staff, she slammed it down crushing the creature's skull, and grimacing as bits of bug brains clung to the wood.

"Ewww," she squeaked, trying to fling the residue off, and transferring some of the mess to her boots instead.

"Nice one, Nichole!" Zell shouted, his muscles flexing while he swatted at a bug that insisted on attacking him. The monster exploded on impact, spilling gore all around him. She didn't have time to do anything but blink before it hit her, the stench of freshly digested blood rising up and gagging her.

Zell laughed. "Oops, sorry. I guess I should pull my punches."

She glared, torn between disgust, anger, and no little awe at just how strong Zell really was. She'd barely made a dent in a bug swinging full force with her staff and Zell had decimated one with one pummel from his fist. It was incredible.

She wiped away as much of the bug innards as she could, before picking off the last few stragglers with spells. She cast Cure on herself, and after a second's thought, Zell, to rid them of any superficial damage.

"Thanks." Zell grinned. "You don't have to worry 'bout me. These things are cake!"

"Must be kinda boring," she commented.

He shrugged, making a non-committal noise. A pained roar broke the silence; the last of Squad D's T-rexuars were defeated.

"Can we join them now?"

Zell looked around. "The area's clear. Officially that's all you were supposed to do. I don't see why we can't."

Starting in that direction, she stepped carefully around the bug corpses littering the ground. She didn't envy the person that would have to clean up the mess. She cringed as the heel of her boot sunk into something indefinable.

She caught a blur of movement out of the corner of her eye. Turning, she searched the trees surrounding them. Something was there, something big and fast. Breaking into a jog, she tried to get within range of the other group to warn them. Halfway there, it struck.

Ten feet passed in a stream of color as she was thrown through the air. Crashing against something hard she heard a loud crack. Agony exploded across her senses, every nerve ending on fire, her vision flickered. All of the air rushed from her in one swift excruciating exhale, as her scream of pain transformed into a low moan. A moment later there was only silence.

-oooOooo-

Anne held in her scream through sheer will; it would only attract the creature. She fought the urge to rush over to where Nichole had landed awkwardly at the base of a large pine. Instead, she forced herself to turn, and studied the monster.

It was ugly… extremely hideous, and towering in height, a mass of red and black. Its mouth of sorts jutted out from its torso at chest level and was lined with centipede-like legs. Its eyeless head sat further up upon a long skinny neck, and two sharp fins jutted out of either side of its back. The creature's arms were almost as long as it legs, and claw tipped fingers brushed the ground to either side of it, while its three clawed legs propelled it around the clearing.

Anne's grip tightened on her glaive, ready for the attack. The creature danced around the clearing, weaving in as if to engage, before backing away again. It was like it was expecting something. "Is it waiting for us to attack?" she whispered to Gavin.

He shook his head slightly, never taking his eyes or the line of his halberd away from the creature. "I think it is waiting for friends."

Tobias stepped in front of her, his dual-bladed broadsword ready to strike. "If it is, we shouldn't give it the chance."

Gavin nodded, stepping up to where Tobias was. Anne steeled herself as the two went in, their weapons twin blurs, and cast a Scan in the creature's direction. A dark screen overlapped her vision, numbers flowed into her mind; it took a few seconds to recognize her own stats. Something was odd, the strength of her magic was blacked out, as if the Scan couldn't tell what it was.

She dropped the spell, wondering if it was a side-effect of the new system. Her vision returned just as Gavin released a Blizzaga. She cried out a warning, but her voice was nothing but a rasp.

The magic zinged through the air, reflecting off the creatures own spells, folding back upon its master, encasing his entire body in deadly ice. Seconds dragged on into an eternity before the ice finally shattered, leaving Gavin leaning heavily on the hilt of his weapon.

Zell rushed forward, his fists a blur, as Anne rubbed her aching throat, wondering when the creature had the time to Silence her. Tobias struck out blindly, his vision blocked by a hovering black shroud of magic, clipping Zell before his blade sunk into the creature's hide.

The monster shrieked, falling over, the weapon still embedded in its chest. Anne clutched her ears in pain while neon red liquid spurted out of the wound, covering Tobias and splashing Zell. Both men screamed, Zell stripping out of his splattered leather jacket in a rush, using it to wipe at the biohazard on his arm while Tobias collapsed, still screaming in the dirt.

Gavin called on the darker blue magic of Water, casting it out at the writhing man. A bubble of liquid picked Tobias up, spinning him, before slamming him back into the ground. The goo was gone, but the price was heavy as Tobias fell unconscious, his chest barely moving.

Zell cursed. "Don'tcha die on me, I'm s'posed to keep y'all safe."

The creature wriggled, showing it still lived, but it didn't look like it was getting up anytime soon. Anne turned her attention back to Tobias, just as Zell cast Life.

Anne held her breath as Heaven's feather floated down, resting over the fallen man. The magic took hold, his body jerking, his amber eyes opening wide as his lungs drew in a ragged gulp of air. Zell was already casting Cure on him, healing the burns that killed him. A few tears fell from her eyes as Tobias rose shakily to his feet. She hated showing such weakness, and wiped her eyes at the first opportunity, but no matter how many times she witnessed the magic take hold she couldn't rid herself of the images of the times it failed.

Gavin cast Cure after Cure, working to get them back to full strength. Anne pulled out an Echo Screen and as the concoction nullified the block over her magic, she added her own Cures to Gavin's.

Tobias wrenched his blade out of the creature's chest, jumping out of range of any blood. When nothing rushed out of the opening, Anne wondered if the thing was dead.

The monster's arms jerked and Anne jumped.

_Nope, definitely alive._

Tobias twisted his weapon, separating it into twin swords while the creature screamed a challenge, charging them. Anne cast Protect on each of the combatants, searching for an opening where her magic, or her weapon could do some damage.

_Here we go again…_

-oooOooo-

Nichole gasped, her eyes opening wide as needle sharp pain radiated from every pore. She couldn't handle it, begging to slip back into the darkness, as her body itself rebelled, heaving the contents of her stomach up in one retch.

Her throat burned from the acid, her eyes watered from the stench as she curled away from the gore.

"Well that was lovely."

She twisted toward the voice, crying when the movement sent a spasm spiraling down her spine. It took all of her will to open her eyes, and look up into Adrian's face.

"Adrian…" she muttered, her voice sounding pathetically small, "the monster…"

"They're taking care of it."

She took stock of what hurt where. Her body throbbed from crashing into the hard surface she was laying against, her head ached horribly, and she couldn't feel her legs but once she got past the immediate pain, there was no feeling of fading, or weakness.

"Go help them," she ordered weakly, "I'm stable."

"I came to help you," he said. "You let out a pretty loud crack when you hit that tree, poor thing."

His tone set her on edge. "I don't need your pity."

He laughed. "Good, 'cause I was referring to the tree."

That was it, the proverbial last straw. A sob rose in her chest, escaping against her will. If she could have moved she would have strangled him, but she couldn't even draw up the strength to cast.

He wasn't even really looking at her; his irises were clouded with the magic of Scan, trying to assess the damage she'd taken. He was frowning by the time the magic dispersed.

He reached around her, his fingertips prodding gently along her spine. Pain bloomed, circling out until he reached a point somewhere near the curve of her butt. She cried out as all sensation vanished.

"Can you feel this?"

She shook her head, unable to form coherent thought, let alone words.

"Good, 'cause it would have gotten me slapped." The humor was lacking in his lame attempt at a joke, and it did little to negate her worry as he prodded the point between pain and nothingness.

"Your spine's been broken. I'm going to attempt to heal it, but I'm not entirely sure that it's within my capabilities."

She nodded slightly, as visions of wheelchairs danced across her mind. If Adrian couldn't heal her, no one would be able to. There was a reason behind _some _of his ego; he was one of the best Healers on Gaea, a rank that earned a title to go with it.

Anyone with a junction could cast a Cure and have it do something, but to actually bend the magic to the caster's will, to force it into the pathways where it would do exactly what needed to be done, that was a whole different story.

If he didn't succeed, her life as she knew it was over. His right hand rested on the space between pain and numbness, while the purple-blue sparkles of the Curaga gathered in his left. She shrieked as his hands met and the cold healing fire flooded into her.

She could feel each muscle, every tendon stretch and knit, fighting the unnatural force. Her nerves came alive as he cast spell after spell, forcing the magic to bend under his effort. She ran out of air, and the scream she hadn't even realized she was emitting cut off abruptly. Her vision blurred but the unconsciousness she prayed for never came.

Finally, everything slid back where it belonged with an inaudible sigh of _rightness_. As the last bits of magic fled her system, they took with them the pain, leaving her sobbing as her brain worked to catch up to her body's changes.

When she regained control of her senses she was cradled against Adrian's chest, his hand tangled in her hair as he murmured inane soothing phrases against her head. She allowed herself a moment to rest, to still her tears, knowing that this side of him, the side she loved more than anything, would be gone as soon as she could be considered "better."

The Jerk would return with a vengeance, as if to erase every bit of humanity and caring she associated with him. It left her feeling out of place. He was a contradiction, an enigma she couldn't figure out. Obviously when her life was at risk he could be counted upon, but when the danger passed he went out of his way to be mean, rude, sarcastic, and downright, well… he was just a jerk.

It was infuriating. And she… she was little better than a joke, because she took it. She couldn't bear to lose him entirely; he may be a jerk, but he was _her_ Jerk.

A sigh heaved through her, snapping Adrian out of his mutterings. His body stiffened beneath her and she pulled away so that she could see his face. He wasn't looking at her however; his attention was fixed on a point beyond her.

Suddenly the crash of swords and fists against flesh rushed back into her ears. She whipped her head around, scanning the area for her comrades, cursing herself for forgetting the battle that raged beyond.

The creature was quick, dodging and blocking attacks at a dizzying rate.

Tobias dove, narrowly missing a claw-tipped arm that shot out after him. He slashed at it, executing a spin mid-air to get in a second slice. Cura gathered in his hand, and he cast it out at Gavin, aiming for the wound torn in his side. The seeping blood slowed, then stopped altogether and Gavin rose to rejoin the battle.

Anne teamed up with a blinded Zell, keeping the tentacle-like arms away from him with her glaive, while he continued to try and hit the monster, keeping it distracted from the others. Even with Anne's help, the blonde seemed to be taking almost as many hits as he dished out, but the long, bleeding gashes barely seemed to faze him.

Tobias and Gavin struck to either side of the creature, aiming for the weak-looking legs that propelled it. Zell stepped into Gavin's attack at the last second, forcing him to pull his blow. Gavin swore as he narrowly missed the blinded man who in turn swung out at where the creature had been, only to meet air. Tobias's weapon struck true, hacking through flesh and sinew like butter. The monster screamed, flailing in agony as its blood hissed and spurted from the opening. Everyone leapt back, away from the liquid that coated everything in its path.

"Can you feel your legs?"

The question pulled her back to Adrian. Nodding, she forced down the flush of heat at their proximity. "Yeah, I think I can stand."

She didn't wait for his response, knowing that it would probably be something along the lines of _'So why don't you do so?'_

Her legs refused to lift her from the position she was in, so she rolled off of him in a rather ungraceful maneuver, making it to her knees. She pushed herself up, ignoring his offered hand, even as the newly mended muscles in her back protested.

Gritting her teeth, she forced her knee up, wincing as pain shot through her. She stood shakily, cursing. Magical healing wasn't the cure-all everyone thought it to be.

"Don't overdo it," Adrian warned, " but they could use your help. I'm not going to be any good for a bit. I'm not sure how much jostling the healed tissue will take, so don't be stupid."

Holding back the instant indignation at his words, she nodded, knowing that behind the insult there was concern. Whether it was for her or the healing he'd be forced to perform if she injured herself again was unclear, and she wasn't willing to guess. She retrieved her staff, leaning heavily on it while she stealthily made her way over to Anne's position.

Tobias and Zell took turns striking at the monster, and the creature retaliated. Anne was silenced; the cloying magic hovered around her, choking her if she attempted to cast. Gavin drew an Esuna from Anne, and then used it on her.

Between the creature's heavy usage of Silence and Blind, toxic blood, and crazy healing ability they had little time to Cure or recover from what hits they received. To top it all off, it seemed like the monster hadn't taken any lasting damage.

Nichole gathered a Cura, casting it on Tobias. A large gash on his arm mended under the magic but she was disappointed to note that he was still covered in cuts and marks that were sure to become bruises.

Nevertheless, Tobias threw her a quick grin before his face fell back into his usual battle stoicism. He adjusted his stance, using both of his blades to the fullest as he stepped up his attacks against the monster's left tentacle. Gavin worked on the other one, weaving in and out of its range, trying to keep it off of the still-blinded Zell.

Zell was a flurry of motion, tossing punches and kicks rapidly at the monster, most of which were dodged. One landed, ripping three of the long leg-like protrusions from the creature's mouth.

The monster emitted a high-pitched screech, and focused its rage on Zell, leaving its tentacle-arm wide open to Gavin's blade. He sliced through the flailing limb with ease.

Nichole thought her ears must be bleeding from the scream the monster let out. Gavin dodged the newly flowing blood gracefully while Tobias guided Zell out of range. Nichole cast Cura on them while they took the respite to rid themselves of the status spells the creature inflicted.

The fluid flowing from the stump slowed, becoming thicker, and a new appendage, exactly the same as the one that had been removed, wriggled out of the torn flesh. Nichole's stomach turned at the sight while the men moved cautiously back into battle.

"Has it been weakened at all?" Nichole asked Anne.

Anne cast another Cure in Zell's direction. "No, at least not that I can tell. I gave up scanning the damn thing after the third time it came back with my stats. It sure doesn't seem like it; every time they hurt it they have to fall back because of the stuff it bleeds. Now's the time we could use one of your harebrained schemes; Tobias' strategy is falling flat."

She resented her ideas being called harebrained, but tried to think of a plan anyway. If the monster still had Reflect up there was nothing she could do… unless… that was it! "Anne, don't waste any Cures on me."

She cast Reflect on herself before unleashing a Tornado. The spell brushed against the magical shield surrounding her before rebounding, bypassing the creature's shield. A vortex of wind carried the monster up into the sky. The monster just managed to right itself as the spell gave out, landing awkwardly on two of its legs.

It screamed in challenge, rushing straight for her. She ducked, just barely avoiding the charge. She winced as the muscles in her back refused to finish the roll, putting her in reach of a tentacle. Her flesh ripped under sharp barbs, its claws sinking into her foot, as the creature knocked her flat.

Pain stole her breath away but the creature gave her no respite, dangling her upside down before its gaping maw. She blinked, wondering if it meant to eat her while its hot, pungent breath wafted over her.

Griever pounced without warning, his body a streak of gray, his claws sinking into the creature's eyeless head. It screamed, dropping her to defend itself. Gasping, she blinked away tears and forced herself to move, crawling over to where her staff lay.

Griever took the monster for a ride, jumping nimbly through the air, dodging the clumsy attacks with ease. Without warning the creature overbalanced, falling in a tangle of sharp limbs.

Griever retreated, missing the arm that snaked out and wrapped around his back leg. The creature rose, pulling the cat along with it before throwing him like a shot-put into the group. Nichole heard the distinct pop of his hip dislocating, but in typical cat fashion he somehow still managed to land on his feet.

Tobias, Gavin, and Zell dove back into the battle, attacking with a ferocity verging on panic. Adrian joined the fray, his rapier a blur of motion as he sliced into the monster's flesh. Blood spurted freely, but Nichole's attention was drawn beyond the fight to the tree line.

Time slowed down; seeming to stop altogether as she noticed the second creature—a mirror image of the first—gliding speedily towards them. It was on them before she could blink, hitting Gavin and knocking him into Adrian. They went down in a heap, leaving Tobias and Anne to defend against the new creature while Zell did his best to manage the old.

Panic seized her as she caught the uncharacteristic fear in her brother's eyes. An idea struck in a flash, and she went with it, knowing it was madness, praying to whatever deity would listen that it would work. Gathering all of her energy, she pulled on the two spells she wanted most; Tornado and Firaga.

Pouring all of her energy into the effort, the two spells fought against her, before they merged into a swirling inferno of wind and flame. She smiled in satisfaction as her world exploded.

-oooOooo-

**AN:** Please review. (Update) I try to post new chapters every Monday but I'm going to be out/busy for the rest of the week so expect chapter 5 out next Monday.

Utmost thanks to Kimmae, the hubby, and all the rest.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

It's half the distance through the open door, before you cut me down… Again…

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, June 14, 082 ALC, 21:00 Hours_

Light flashed across the plain as lightning struck the rain-soaked earth. Waves crashed mercilessly against beaten rock and trees bent dangerously under forceful winds. Out on the raging sea, clouds circled hungrily, their smoky tendrils spiraling down to touch the water below. The waves rose gleefully to meet the air, dancing around the tunnel of wind.

Squall gazed silently out of his office windows, watching the water funnel forming south of Balamb's shore. It twisted and turned, growing larger with every rotation. The towering tornado headed west, on a course for Balamb Harbor, and he hit the alarm, warning the neighboring towns of the danger.

The Garden groaned as the gears wound up, raising the metal shutters over the windows. He sighed, moving away from the viewport and back to his desk. Storms had always made him uneasy, a feeling that had only grown since the ordeal of time compression.

Yet the storm wasn't what was weighing so heavily on his mind. No, that honor belonged to what was sitting on his desk, a blight on the shining mahogany. One piece of paper had the Commander of Balamb Garden, the leader of SeeD, tied in knots. It was so absurd it was funny, but Squall was certainly not laughing.

He glared at the words again as if they might disappear under his vehemence, but as before the gold calligraphy shined brightly against the blue and black Balamb insignia.

SeeD Graduation Diploma

Presented to: Seifer Almasy

On this day: June 14th, 082 ALC

This diploma is presented to the above recipient to show successful completion of Garden curriculum, and the passing of all SeeD Exams.

Welcome to SeeD!

Signed: Commander Squall Leonhart

Signed: _Cid Kramer _ Headmaster Cid Kramer

Seifer… even the name sparked such an array of emotions within him. It hadn't been his choice to admit his archenemy back into the fold. Cid had put in the request himself, and a directive from Cid, no matter how abhorrent, was not something to be ignored. Matron had appealed on her knight's behalf, her argument sound, as much as Squall hated to admit it; Seifer had been just as much Ultimecia's pawn as Edea had.

His hand forced, Squall had little recourse but to agree to admit Seifer into the exam; a last ditch effort for the fallen knight to prove that he belonged. Squall had looked forward to it, had dreaded it; had been so damn sure the cocky bastard would fail, as he always had. For five years running Seifer had never passed the field exam; he was too much of an arrogant prick to follow the directives and Squall had doubted that much had changed.

How could he have been wrong?

Irvine and Selphie had been assigned to Seifer's team for the test. Neither felt anything but animosity for the blonde but Squall had known that they could be trusted to be unbiased. Maybe a little too unbiased, as they'd passed the man that continued to be a thorn in his side. Seifer had scored low on the attitude portion as usual, but for the first time he'd excelled in attack, spirit, and even judgment. It put him well above the lowest score to pass, belonging to a girl that landed in the infirmary after blowing up her assigned area.

Zell's good report on the candidate's quick-thinking had been the only thing that kept her from failing, and since Squall had allowed her to pass, he had little grounds to dismiss Seifer's scores.

He was left with two equally distasteful options: Refuse to sign Seifer's diploma, look like an ass and probably have his position called into question; or accept back into Garden the potentially deadly man, who had committed treason not only against Garden, but against him personally.

Sickly sweet perfume clouded the air, pulling him from his thoughts as Rinoa floated through his office door. His heart sped up, but contradictorily a sense of calm settled over him at her presence. She was so beautiful… She looked as she had the moment he first laid eyes on her, the white cocktail dress hugging her slight frame as it had the night of his own graduation ball.

"Squall, I thought you'd be at the party by now. I had to get Quistis to tell me where you were." She wrinkled her nose, expressing her distaste for his blonde. It was unlike Rinoa to be so unkind and the jarring sentiment ruined his previous calm in an instant.

He wondered just where the sweet forgiving girl he'd fallen in love with had scampered off to. He didn't exactly blame her; he was as thick as a brick when it came to other people's emotions, but even he could tell that Quistis had previously had some sort of crush on him. At least Quistis had tried to be mature about it by refusing to let her feelings interfere with how she treated Rinoa. He wished some of that maturity would rub off.

"I just have one more thing to do and then I'll come. It'll only take a second." Quickly he grabbed the paper, hastily scrawling his signature on the line, before folding it roughly and shoving it into his jacket pocket. "Done," he said, turning back to her.

"Good, now let's go!"

He smiled, trailing her in her exuberant wake to the elevator. One thing could always be said about Rinoa: she didn't lack for energy.

Lively music spilled out into the hallway as the gilded ballroom doors opened and a slightly intoxicated couple stumbled out. He barely avoided crashing into them, and considered giving them a warning as they saluted.

Rinoa tugged on his arm, pulling him inside and effectively trapping him in the crowded, overly-bright room. Handsomely dressed couples, intermixed with those in SeeD uniform, swirled gracefully on the shining dance floor. At one end a buffet was set up, the plentiful food and drink drawing a sizable crowd, as waiters carrying champagne flutes wove through them. Tables lined the perimeter, most of them already occupied in some form or another, and it was toward one of them that Rinoa was steadily dragging him. There the rest of their group sat, their laughter easily discernible even over the din of the other partygoers.

Irvine leaned casually into a blushing Selphie, whispering something in her ear. Quistis sat on Selphie's other side, trying to carry on a conversation with Zell who was busy stuffing his face with Balamb's famous hot dogs. Zell's girlfriend—Squall couldn't remember her name—sat on Zell's other side, a look of complete adoration on her face.

Zell had tried stuffing just one too many hotdogs in his mouth _again _and was turning a peculiar shade of blue, while those around him laughed at his foolishness. A twinge of sympathy and some fear went through Squall as Zell sputtered. Tearing away from Rinoa, he went to help the struggling man just as Quistis rose from her seat, her laughter dying in her throat. They reached Zell in the same instant, pounding on his back until he managed to swallow.

Zell turned to his rescuers. "Th-Thank you."

Quistis laughed, and the tension was broken. "I told you to take it slower this time."

"I wanted to get more before they run out..." Zell explained sheepishly.

Squall shook his head slightly in wonderment. No matter how much things seemed to change, they would always remain the same. Pulling out Quistis' chair for her in a gesture so innate it required no thought, he waited until she sat before turning to do the same for Rinoa.

She'd already plopped into the chair next to Irvine and was busy carrying on an animated conversation with Selphie about plans for a Fall Harvest Ball. He sighed, and realizing he was hovering somewhat awkwardly behind Rinoa's chair, took the only vacant seat left between her and Zell's girlfriend.

He let the conversations flow around him, feigning attention when he caught his name but otherwise content to watch the faces of the couples on the dance floor. Occasionally he'd spot someone he knew—Xu dancing with Nida, trying hopelessly to avoid having her toes mashed beneath his somewhat clumsy steps—Headmaster Cid and Edea performing a perfect waltz across the gleaming wood. Yet it was the familiar blonde head of Seifer that truly caught his attention. He danced gracefully with a small, pale, platinum-haired girl, who Squall only recognized by the distinct eye patch.

So Fuijin had been reaccepted as well. Squall had wondered briefly about her when the request for Seifer's admittance had crossed his desk, but as she and Raijin hadn't applied for the SeeD test, he hadn't been informed.

He felt for the folded piece of paper within his pocket, intending to deliver it when Rinoa's exasperated voice finally cut through his thoughts.

"I'm sorry, I have to go do something." He tossed an apologetic look her way, wasting no time, unwilling to lose the chance of getting his onerous task over with. After he finished, Rinoa could have his undivided attention. He ignored Rinoa's response, taking off into the crowd.

Fuijin's one eye widened in surprise as he came up behind Seifer, calling his attention to Squall's presence.

"Seifer…" Squall said. Seifer turned, his usual smug grin auspiciously absent as his green eyes regarded him calculatingly. "I just wanted to give you this," he explained uncomfortably, handing him the slightly wrinkled certificate.

Seifer took it, reading it thoroughly with a look of utter disbelief that had Squall rethinking his earlier debate. "Just don't make me regret it," he warned, albeit in a friendlier tone.

"I won't… Commander." Seifer grinned, throwing a perfect SeeD salute. Squall watched, dumfounded, as Seifer tugged Fuijin away, the wide smile on her face only matched by the one adorning his.

It was unnerving how much Seifer had changed, how much Squall's own anger and prejudices had blinded him. Seifer still had some of his over-confidence, but it was tempered with a kind of… maturity.

Squall's thoughts were interrupted as a short, slight woman in SeeD regalia bumped into him, and a lock of her waist-length auburn hair snagged around one of the buttons on his jacket. Unfazed—as if she didn't even notice her blunder—she gazed at something on the other side of the ballroom. He sighed, debating on chastising the girl for her rudeness as he quickly untangled the snarl from his person. Something about her, however, kept him from speaking. He searched for what it could be.

It certainly wasn't her looks. From the glimpse he'd gotten of her face he would describe her as plain, kind of like Xu, not ugly but uninteresting compared to someone such as Rinoa.

Still, he couldn't help but trail her unconsciously, trying to figure out just why he felt he knew her. He'd seen her before somewhere, but where? An echo of thunder crashed over the music of the ballroom and he was lost in a memory of a storm, a storm much like the one raging beyond the Garden's walls.

_Red dots littered the horizon, standing out sharply from the muted yellows and blues amongst a sea of green. A sudden flash lit up the cloudy sky as the fields trembled in its wake. Waves crashed against weathered rock, the sound carrying for miles on the open plain. Dark clouds rumbled ominously, telling of the danger that would come. The storm had only begun._

_A figure glided through the dots of red heading calmly towards the looming safety of the orphanage. A flash revealed the form as a girl, young in age, small in stature. The girl continued on her trek as if the rising gales were gentle breezes, and the bolts of lightning harmless fireworks. Her eyes were unseeing as she walked through the sea of colors, yet they never left their target. _

_A child stepped away from the a stone pillar, waiting for the girl to come up the steps and Squall recognized the field now. It was the flower field by the orphanage. The one Rinoa had promised to be at if they were separated. The girl spoke, her crystal-toned voice interrupting his thoughts. "He send you out to watch me again?"_

"_Yes." He was older than he expected, perhaps ten or eleven but there was little doubt that the child was himself. He'd had too much experience with vivid memories to ignore this one. The girl looked to the clouds, the lightning struck in the distance. A faint cry echoed through the storm and he knew that the girl heard it as well when her head shot up. His younger self was startled when the girl took off in the direction of the cry, towards the cliffs. _

He was torn forcefully from the vivid scene by the insistent poking on his chest. Rinoa stood before him, tapping her foot in frustration, an irritated look marring her beautiful face. "Finally! Where were you, La-La Land?" He shook his head, clearing the images from his mind, as she continued her tirade. "I asked you to dance like four times already and you were just staring off into the crowd."

Still feeling out of it—GF locked memories were always intense and mostly unpleasant when released—he drew in a breath. "Not now, Rinoa…" he started, trying to think of some excuse for his discourteous behavior. "I…"

She threw up her hands in disgust, interrupting his attempt at an apology. "Fine!" she huffed, turning on her heel and stomping across the ballroom. Her heels rang out sharply against the marble floor and he winced with every resounding click, wondering just when everything had started to turn sour. Rinoa had always been the one to understand what he meant, sometimes even before he said anything. Why was it so hard to communicate now? He hadn't meant to chase her off, he just hadn't wanted to dance right then.

Seifer intercepted her halfway across the room, and while Squall couldn't hear their conversation, he could guess by the gestures that he was asking her to dance. An invitation she accepted with a bright smile that made Squall's heart clench. Jealousy warred with guilt when he realized that if he had just done the same that smile would have been directed at him, where it belonged.

The thought of upsetting her made him feel so small. Vowing silently to make it up to her, he wound his way back to the refreshment table, picking up two glasses of punch (since Rinoa didn't like champagne). With a glass in each hand he turned, almost crashing into his second red-head of the evening.

This one was most assuredly male, perhaps an inch shorter than Irvine. His hair was the same shade as the girl's and cropped close to his head. The eyes were also the same, and yet again staring off into the crowd.

Squall followed the man's line of sight easily; as he maneuvered through the crowded room his eyes were resting on a blonde woman dressed in SeeD regalia. Quistis?

No doubt about it, the guy was making his way steadily to Squall's assistant.

Squall wondered if Quistis knew the man, or perhaps the clumsy redhead from before. Setting the almost forgotten punch glasses onto a passing waiter's tray, Squall made his way over to the duo, arriving just after the man finished his introduction.

"Am I interrupting?" he asked courteously, surprised by the shock that crossed the man's face. A hint of recognition sparked in his amber eyes, leaving Squall feeling disadvantaged. This man seemed to know him, yet he was completely in the dark.

Quistis responded, filling the silence. "No, not at all, Squall. This is Tobias Skye; he's one of the SeeD graduates. I was just congratulating him."

Squall was disappointed that the revealed name hadn't triggered any recognition. "Then congratulations. You aren't from Balamb," he prompted, wondering where this Tobias had transferred in from.

"He's from Trabia. Honestly, Squall, do you even read the papers that I give you or do you just sign them and hope I'm not robbing you blind?"

He could tell she'd meant it as a wisecrack but her comment came too close to the truth for comfort. He had been counting on her to read all of the documents that passed his desk. He'd been too preoccupied with fretting over Seifer and trying not to think of Rinoa's sexual advances to pay attention.

It wasn't that he didn't want Rinoa, no… that was far, far from the truth. It was just that her change from staunch virginal maiden to crazy sex fiend had somewhat frightened him. He wasn't sure how to advance without feeling like he was taking advantage.

The uncomfortable silence was ended with a rich masculine laugh. "It's nice to see that some things never change."

Tobias answered, "I wasn't supposed to say anything. I was told you wouldn't remember, something about GFs, but she obviously didn't know he was here. This is very confusing!"

"Who told you?" Squall asked, a shiver of warning traveling down his spine.

"Nichole," Tobias answered absentmindedly, contemplating just how much he should tell them.

Quistis spoke up. "Who didn't she know was here?"

"Squall." Tobias sighed.

Quistis and Squall did a double-take. "What do you mean?" Quistis asked, all the more confused.

"I might as well tell you, but it would be easier if you remembered. We were at the orphanage in Centra together."

That would make sense. So the girl from before must have been the girl he was talking about.

"Your sister, she looks like you?" Quistis asked.

"We're twins. Do you remember her?"

Quistis shook her head before the connections completed in her mind. "Toby? She called you Toby! I remember! We were roommates until I was adopted, and I always thought she was a little weird. Everyone did, not that most of them would say it. Does she still wear pants under everything?"

"Yes, but don't call her weird, she gets unnecessarily offended," Tobias answered in a way that seemed long-suffering.

Quistis sighed, her blues eyes apologetic. "Sorry, I didn't mean it that way."

Tobias shook his head. "I don't particularly care, she _is_ a little weird. It just bugs her so I didn't want you to get off on the wrong foot, per se."

Suddenly the memories began pouring into Squall, rushing forward at a speed that left him drained and lightheaded. Sis had been taken from him almost three years before Nichole had arrived at the orphanage. He'd vowed not to depend on anyone again, not to care for anything, but then this little pale girl with eyes just as haunted as his own had stormed into his life.

He'd rescued her the first time they'd met. She'd run into trouble with a bully that arrived two years prior—Squall couldn't remember his name now, but it didn't matter. The little wraith of a girl had shown a spark, standing up to the tyrant, but Squall had known that she'd be no match for him and had intervened.

She'd followed Squall around the rest of the day, thanking him up and down, and trying futilely to draw him into conversation. She had irritated him then; he had spent so long trying not to depend on anyone and along the same vein, to not have anyone depend on him. It just wasn't worth it in the end.

She hadn't left him alone though, no matter how he'd snapped and snarled at her or tried to freeze her out. When it had been revealed that they were related, the dynamic had changed little by little. He came to care for her, to come out of the shell he'd hidden in for so long; if only for this girl that was too stubborn to leave him be. He'd eventually seen himself as her protector, a role that irritated her to no end, but no matter how annoyed they made each other they had a bond that couldn't be broken.

Then came that day… the day when the storm had wracked Centra, tearing his family apart. It had been morning when Matron had given them the news that she was shutting down the orphanage. That they were all going to live at a place called Garden. It was late that afternoon that they'd said their goodbyes, filing onto separate buses.

The betrayal he'd felt came rushing back, his fists clenching unconsciously against the tide. It was a year to the day after he'd arrived at his new Garden that he'd had his Griever ring forged as a reminder to never depend on anyone again. He would always be alone.

Some joke that had turned out to be. He'd forgotten the reason behind the ring just as he'd forgotten everything else and now that same ring hung around Rinoa's neck, as a pledge that he would protect her. It was a poetic quirk of fate.

"From the murderous look on his face I can see Squall remembers," Tobias said, "but before he kills me I'd like him to go see Nichole…. and to know that we had nothing to do with the Garden selections."

Squall fought to keep his composure, contemplating Tobias' words. He'd always been so sure that he was right, that depending on others, that caring about them only led to betrayal and heartache. Trust only equaled pain in the end.

Then he'd met Rinoa, another girl constantly falling into danger—another that wouldn't just let him be. He nodded curtly to the man who was still looking to him for some kind of response.

"Where is she?"

"Nichole has this odd fascination with storms. She says they make her feel free," Tobias informed him, rolling his eyes.

Squall moved away from them, eyes scanning the crowd near the windows. The shutters here were slatted, allowing a protected view of the storm. He spotted her, sucking in air as he noted that the grown version of his cousin wasn't much different than the child, in that both just couldn't stay out of trouble. She wasn't on inside looking out, no… she was out on the balcony, standing calmly amid the gale, watching the water tornado twirl in the distance. It had turned again, doubling in size as it headed back toward the Garden.

Outside, the wind wasn't as bad as he'd expected. It whipped around him, gleefully tugging at his hair and his commendation medals, but it didn't pose the threat he'd assumed. Some of the tension he felt dissipated, until he noticed a strange purple-pink shimmer intermingled with blue... Shell and Protect. There were three sets of them placed strategically around the area. Fear gnawed at his gut as he realized that without the spells they both would have been blown off their feet. He reached her just as she turned, slamming into him.

"Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't think there was anyone else out here," she said quickly. Her voice was as he'd remembered, albeit a little panicked. He shook off the impact, examining her in the dim light. She'd certainly grown from the girl of eleven in his memory.

"You just have a habit of running into people, don't you?" he said, remembering just how many times he'd watched her do the same thing.

She looked at him then, studying his face with an intensity that otherwise would have been uncomfortable. Her emotions played out in her eyes as they always had: shock, fear, joy, then finally love.

"Oh Hyne… Oh, Hyne! Squall!" She squealed, throwing her arms around him, laughing.

Dumbstruck, he nodded, not quite knowing what to do or say. Finally he hugged her back.

She pulled away, examining him from head to toe. "Wow, you sure have grown. What's with the scar?" she asked, touching the broad slash between his eyes briefly before shaking her head. "Hyne, I've missed you so much!"

"Has Tobias been treating you that badly?" he wondered aloud.

Their relationship had always been somewhat distant, and although they seemed to know each other inside and out, they didn't work or play together very much as children.

She laughed. "Of course not, he's been his usual self."

His usual self… Squall could barely remember what Tobias' usual self was… "Ah, I remember," he stated more to himself than her. "That means ignoring you, unless you're in trouble, and chasing after girls."

She shook her head, hitting him playfully in the arm. "No! Well, maybe it does, but Gavin's there."

He wondered who this Gavin was; he definitely didn't remember anyone by that name that lived at the orphanage. "Gavin?"

"Yeah, we met him at Trabia Garden. He was on the Disciplinary Committee there and bailed me out of what could have been trouble." She blushed.

"Is he your boyfriend or something?" he asked, not really caring, but curious about the blushing.

"Gavin? Ha-Ha. No, Gavin's not my boyfriend. For one thing, he's not that attractive."

The shallowness of the comment surprised Squall. "Is he deformed or something?"

"No, it's just… well, he just reminds me so much of you. If you were darker, that is."

A little shocked and a little hurt at being considered unattractive, he glared. "What do you mean?"

She just smiled mischievously. "You also share something else in common. A last name. Leonhart."

"Really?" That was a surprise; another Leonhart at Garden would surely have come to his attention at some point.

"Yep! We have another cousin. Remember our mothers had another sister? Well, the short version is it turned out she had a boy. He was sent to Trabia and given his father's name, Mortis."

"That would be why I haven't heard of him. So this Gavin took my place?"

"No, of course not. Like anyone could ever take _your_ silent, brooding place. I've never met anyone as somber." She laughed as he rolled his eyes.

Honestly, if that's what she thought, she could take her Gavin and go rot with him. He crossed his arms in frustration; he didn't need this.

She smiled. "Squall, I didn't mean anything by it. I could never replace you. I missed you. You have no idea just how much."

He dropped his arms, and was surprised when she took the opportunity to hug him again. He realized she was crying, sobbing silently against his jacket. He found himself at a loss for words. He was overwhelmed, bombarded by emotions he couldn't make any sense of. He squeezed her to him, wondering how he hadn't known this integral piece of him had been missing.

It felt somewhat like coming home, he decided. "I only just remember but the loss of all those years…" It made him angry.

Footsteps sounded behind him, and turning to deal with the intruder, pain exploded across his cheek. The slap resounded off the balcony walls echoing before being swallowed in the wind.

"How—how DARE YOU!" Rinoa screamed.

Squall's senses came back to him just in time to catch a glimpse of black on white as the girl ran away.

Nichole examined his red cheek. "Who was that?" she asked mildly.

Squall shook his head; he didn't have time for explanations. He needed to find her, to explain. "I'll tell you later. I have to go."

"I understand." Nichole smiled sadly. "I hope you find her."

The SeeD Ball was still in full swing when Squall stepped back into the ballroom. The crowd had thinned out a bit and it was much easier to navigate as he searched desperately for a hint of white amongst the green of the SeeD uniforms. She had to be there.

He didn't feel that the scene she'd walked in on had been wrong—it wasn't. But even he could see why she would take it as such. He wasn't known to be a touchy-feely guy, so hugging some random woman—random at least to Rinoa—on a private balcony was definitely out of the norm for him.

Still, he wished she hadn't jumped to conclusions, and his cheek still stung where she slapped him. He was angry… pissed even, that she had so little trust in him. He hadn't stomped over and ordered her to stop dancing with Seifer, even though his male pride had demanded it, because he trusted her. He knew that she would come back to him.

_Whatever…_ He tore himself out of his thoughts long enough to scan the crowd again, this time for anyone who might know where his love had gone. Seifer was sitting at one of the tables with his cronies, Quistis was dancing with a smiling Irvine. Selphie was dancing and chatting up a storm with an unknown man in a SeeD uniform.

Out of his choices, he headed for Quistis and Irvine.

"Squall, buddy," Irvine called out as he came close. "Here, why don't you take this lovely lady off my hands so I can go rescue… well, I'm not sure if I'll be rescuing Selphie or that guy she knows, but one of them."

He didn't wait for an answer placing Quistis in Squall's arms and prodding him into moving before dashing away. He danced rather stiffly, wondering just how in the hell he'd gotten into the mess he was in.

"I'm sorry," Quistis whispered. "You don't have to dance with me."

He shook his head; he wasn't against the notion, he was just frustrated with the time he was wasting doing so.

"It's fine." He held her more firmly out of courtesy. "Actually, I wanted to ask you if you'd seen Rinoa recently."

She shook her head. "No… wait, yes… she passed by a minute or so ago. I think Zell went after her. She was looking pretty angry about something."

"Did you see which way they went?"

"No, sorry. Irvine forced me into dancing at that point."

He nodded. The song ended, giving him the excuse to take off without being rude.

"Thanks for the dance," Quistis called out.

He nodded again but didn't turn, knowing that she wouldn't take any offense. He headed for the dorms, the most obvious place for Rinoa to go.

He thought about Quistis and her quiet acceptance of him. She was good like that. As much as everyone assumed he didn't like the blonde woman, they were wrong. He'd always liked her, just not in the way she seemed to like him. First he'd seen her as a mentor, well-meaning, but a bit stifling in her attempts to coddle him. Then during the War he'd begun to see her as a sister. She was someone to protect, as she did her best to keep everyone alive and cared for.

He didn't mind having her as his assistant. He knew that no matter what she could be counted upon. Now that he no longer got the vibe that she wished for something more, he'd begun to like spending time with her. She was always there when he needed her, unobtrusively providing support and advice. She was also completely willing to put him in his place—and embarrass him as well—he remembered with some chagrin.

He reached Rinoa's dorm, knocking on the door. There was no answer, and after five minutes of pounding, he'd worked himself into a state of frenzy. He gave up with a snarl, unwilling to attract anymore unwanted attention. She either wasn't there or was being a child and not answering.

He punched the wall beside her door in frustration, wincing at the bite of pain across his knuckles. Where else could she be? His emotions were more turbulent than the storm raging outside, as everything seemed to collapse in on him at once. Where else could she be? He shouldn't be running all over Garden looking for her when he could barely think straight. He needed her, needed her insight about the revelations of the night.

He walked without a destination in mind, not knowing where she would go. They'd only been back in Garden permanently for a few weeks and he hadn't had time to find out where she went when she wasn't with him. He didn't even know why he was trying to find her anymore. She was angry, and with his own rage flowing so closely to the surface, how was he going to deal with her?

He was overwhelmed. His head ached and he rubbed his scar in irritation. Why wouldn't his brain just shut up and let him think?

He snapped out of it abruptly as the sounds of flesh meeting leather assaulted his ears. The greenery of the Training Center greeted him as he stood just outside of the SeeD gym, wondering how he'd gotten there. Shaking his head, he realized it didn't matter; he was there, and so he might as well release some of his frustration.

Stale sweat and overwhelmingly sweet air freshener invaded his nose as he entered through the thick sliding glass doors. The room was empty, save the owner of the fists pounding the punching bag in the corner.

The man's back was to him and a vivid tattoo of a gold and red phoenix rising from the ashes covered most of it. Squall wouldn't have recognized the man however, except for the hair—the blonde spiky style that only belonged to Zell Dincht.

Zell put more force behind his swings, causing the overstuffed bag to rock on its chain. Squall admired his form, studying it as Zell flew up into a roundhouse kick that would have easily dropped a man. The bag shook and the chain creaked, threatening to drop its heavy load.

Squall grinned. This was just the sort of distraction he needed. "What'd that thing ever do to you?"

Zell started, whipping around in a fighting stance, but as his eyes focused on the intruder he sagged, the fight leaving him. "Nothin' really, just venting a little steam. These functions never were my kinda thing."

Squall gave a half-shrug, not really caring what the man's problem was. Shrugging out of the stiff formal jacket, he slipped out of his shiny black boots and peeled off his socks. He turned to Zell. "Spar me."

It was more a demand than a request but Zell nodded, falling back to the far side of the mat. He dropped into a fighting stance with Squall mirroring his movements. "Begin!" he called.

Seconds later Squall was forced to rethink his sanity as the fury that was Zell came at him. Zell was grace personified, performing a flurry of moves that Squall could barely keep up with. Pain arched across his chest as he failed to block a kick, but somehow he managed to duck the fist that followed. Blocking the knee aimed at his abdomen, he knew the battle was over almost as soon as it had begun.

If he'd had his gunblade the match would have been about even, but Zell was in a league of his own when it came to the martial arts, making Squall seem like the clumsiest of students. He blocked two kicks successfully but missed the punch aimed for his gut.

His breath left him in a huff as his senses exploded. He wheezed, doubling over as he fought to breathe. He waved off Zell's panicked apologies, fighting for composure. Gritting his teeth, he straightened, wincing as the abused muscles pulled taut.

"I just got carried away. I wasn't really thinking," Zell explained.

"Obviously," Squall grunted, annoyed when Zell's head hung in shame. He hadn't quite meant it the way it came out. "Nothing more than a bruise," he amended.

Zell groaned, plopping down on the mat in frustration. "Still, I'm sorry. I… just… well, today has not been my day."

Squall thought about just walking away. He had enough problems to deal with; he certainly didn't need anyone else's. Yet he found himself gingerly sitting next to the man. _What was that saying? Oh, yes… Misery loves company._

"Considering how much you guys love to tell me it helps to talk about it, I'm surprised you can't take your own advice," Squall commented. The expression of dumbfounded shock on Zell's face was worth taxing his vocal chords and Squall fought hard not to laugh as Zell blushed.

"I didn't think you were in a listening mood," Zell finally managed.

Squall shrugged. "Might as well be." Peeling off his sweaty tank he tossed it over to the pile of discarded clothes. He hated the feel of drying sweat more than he hated feeling exposed; besides, it was just Zell.

"Well, if you're sure…" Zell said warily. Squall nodded curtly, wondering just what he'd gotten himself into.

"This whole week has just been crap, but today just tops it all off. First I'm assigned to go pick up transfer students at the train station, which wasn't that bad, but I was pulled back from leading the SeeD team that went to Esthar."

Squall nodded—he'd been the one to assign Zell to that operation in the first place. He knew Zell was ready to take on more responsibility, and Zell was always looking for a fight so the mission had suited him. He'd had no choice but to recall him, however, when the Garden Committee had requested experienced SeeDs to assist with the exam.

He felt he owed some explanation, but didn't know what to say besides empty platitudes. For some reason it mattered that Zell didn't think he was the one who'd held him back. "The order came in from the Committee; I would have overruled them if I could."

Zell nodded, a slight smile on his lips. "Thanks, man. That means a lot."

As much as he still thought of Zell as a hot-headed loudmouth, he'd proven his worth a hundred times over during the Sorceress War. There was no other he'd trust to watch his back as much as Zell. He was his best ally, if not his best friend.

"I can't say I didn't like the new arrivals, though," Zell said, breaking the silence. "I don't think wiping out a bunch of monsters would be as amusing as that pair."

"Only two?" Squall inquired, unsure of which group Zell had been sent to retrieve.

Zell shook his head, the corners of his lips twitching as he suppressed a smile. "No, there were five of them, a group from Trabia." A cold spark of awareness shot down Squall's spine. There was no such thing as a coincidence today.

He traced his scar in a familiar calming gesture. "Nichole and Tobias Skye in this group?"

Zell did a double take. "Yeah, why?"

"I'll tell you when you're done with your story, it promises to be interesting."

"Not really, I just found their arguing funny. Apparently on the way here Nichole was seated next to this guy named Adrian, something I was assured by the others was the worst possible thing to do. Anyway, she was complaining about the heat and Adrian decided to remedy her problem with a bottle of water poured down her back. She didn't take too kindly to that."

Squall chuckled. No, Nichole never had been one to anger. Adrian… things clicked into place. That had been the name of the bully at the orphanage. "She never was someone to be trifled with, which is why Adrian has always done it. Standing on the brink of death amuses him."

"You're telling me you know these people?"

"You should too; you didn't leave until after they came."

Zell was bewildered. "Left? Left where?"

"The orphanage," Squall answered absently, trying to hash out the time-line in his head. "Adrian and Tobias were there before you left. I don't think Nichole had arrived yet."

Zell gestured wildly with his hands. "We were only in the orphanage until we were five, how I am supposed to remember?"

"We were in the orphanage a lot longer, we just don't remember after five because of the GF."

Zell picked at his stiff uniform pants as he thought. "I understand… The GFs make room for their power by compacting our memories. They're still there but they need a trigger to activate them. So we had one trigger with Irvine but it wasn't enough to release all of them."

"Memory loss is why Odine's new GF Essence Junctions were accepted," Squall reminded him. Although he'd thought it a crackpot idea at the time, one that played into the media hype about the Guardians, now he felt some relief that others wouldn't be going through what they faced.

Zell nodded. "I know, that's what everyone was using today at the SeeD test."

"How did that go? We've done field tests but nothing that large scale."

"The system itself does what Odine promised but it'll take some gettin' used to," he said with a shrug. "We were able to use magic like usual but a side effect seems to be magic-based exhaustion. We can cast any spell available when we are junctioned to the GF, but using the EsJ we rely on our own strength with magic. It's draining. Only those with a high magic affinity were able to cast more than your basic level one spells. They _were_ still able to cast, so I guess it serves its function."

"I'm glad it went well then." Squall was relieved. With this new technology the Garden as a whole would be stronger. Guardian Forces were becoming rarer as time went on. No one was sure where they were disappearing to, but something was happening to them. The amount that Squall had collected over the course of the war was almost unheard of.

Galbadia and Esthar both had technologies that allowed them to cast a small array of spells indiscriminately, and Trabia and Galbadia Gardens had their own versions, but Balamb Garden had felt that limiting their magic as such would be a huge detriment to their strength after having the GFs at their disposal for so long.

"It didn't really go as well as all that. A good GF could have saved our asses more easily at the end of the fight. The only thing that saved us was Nichole double-casting level threes. I've never seen anything like it; somehow the spells mixed, setting the whole area on fire. This GF dependency thing is just a bunch of crap. The GFs are stronger than we'll ever be, why not use them?"

Squall paraphrased what he'd been told when he'd voiced the same question. "Some feel that the GFs will not be around forever; not much is known on the history of the Guardians, they just simply appeared one day, and they seem to be disappearing again. If we're too dependent on their power, we won't be strong enough to protect ourselves, and that's besides the obvious effect of memory loss."

Zell punched the ground, "Tch… Fine, tell me how I know them anyways."

"I was six when you were adopted. You wouldn't have known Nichole—she came when I was seven—but Tobias and Adrian were there the year you left. Adrian took up with Seifer in bullying you, and Quistis just couldn't keep up between the two."

Zell concentrated on remembering for a few moments before sighing. "I just don't remember… So why were you on the balcony with a certain red-head this evening?" he asked, changing the subject.

Squall did a double-take. "Wait… You saw that?"

Zell shook his head. "I followed Rinoa hightailing it from the ballroom. She was pretty upset; I didn't get much outta her 'sides tears and a rant about some red-headed tramp. I don't know any red-heads 'sides Nichole now, and I told Rinoa she must not've seen what she thought she had, but she was pretty convinced that something was going on."

"Yeah, she hit me over it, so I'm not surprised she came to the wrong conclusion."

"I didn't hear that part of it. So what were you doing out on the balcony then, and who was the girl?"

Squall glared, wanting to snap that it wasn't any of his business, but something stopped him. Why did he feel the need to explain? "It was Nichole; she's my cousin on my mother's side. Tobias and Gavin are related to me as well, through the two older sisters my mother had, but I only learned that I had family after Nichole arrived at the orphanage."

"Ah, well that explains it," Zell said. "I wondered why those two reminded me of you."

Squall was confused. "Tobias and Gavin," Zell explained, "you all share some of the same facial characteristics. Gavin looks more like you than Tobias, though."

Squall shrugged. It was expected, knowing his father—he knew he'd gotten most of his looks from his mother.

"Well, damn!" Zell exclaimed suddenly. "Poor Rinoa, she's so torn up over nothing. Anybody'd be hugging family they hadn't seen in a while. It must have been tough being without them."

"It probably was. I don't really remember; it was one of the things the GFs took, but enough about this. What's the end to your horrible day?"

"Nothing as interesting as meeting long-lost relatives, just embarrassing myself with choking again, and Callista is thinking of transferring to Galbadia to help reorganize the library there. Apparently the soldiers occupying it ransacked the place."

Callista—he remembered now—that was Zell's girlfriend's name. "Sorry…" Squall mumbled, not quite sure what else to say. This was why he never got involved in other people's problems. What was he supposed to say to something like that? Hyne, sometimes he wondered if being with Rinoa outweighed the stress to his life that she invariably added.

Rinoa… "Did you see which way Rinoa went? I still need to find her and explain."

"Yeah, man, she was headin' for the dorms last time I saw."

Squall was frustrated all over again. He rose mindful of his bruising abs and traveled to the clothes pile. That meant she probably just hadn't answered her door when he'd gone to her earlier; she could be so immature sometimes.

Yawning, Zell rose and stretched. "Man, I need some sleep."

Squall pulled on his boots. Sleep sounded good; he was too tired to deal with any more stress. If Rinoa wanted to act like a child, she could just wait until morning for an explanation. He hoped by then he would be able to think of something to say. He slipped his jacket on over bare skin, refusing to think of pulling on his sweaty shirt.

They walked back to the dorms in silence, until Zell reached his room, hesitating in the doorway. "If you need anything, Squall, don't be afraid to ask."

Squall nodded, wondering what had possessed the man to make such an offer as the door slid shut behind him.

He had a lot to think over. He'd never been one for strong bursts of emotion, so the anger he'd felt—that he still felt—triggered a type of despair in him that he wasn't equipped to deal with. It didn't help matters that his first thought was to go find solace from the feeling with Rinoa.

His movements were slow and strained as he punched the code into his door. Slipping off his boots, he left them where they lay, slapping the pad that controlled the lights. He didn't even notice the figure sitting on his bed until it shifted.

Years of training overrode his senses as he fell into a defensive stance. "Honestly Squall, I'm not here to kill you."

"Rinoa…" Her name was a sigh, a prayer for her comfort.

She tilted her head in acknowledgment, "Who else? Or were you expecting that tramp from the balcony?"

All thoughts of peace in her presence fled, leaving him feeling as if he'd been upended into a pool of ice. "I wasn't expecting anyone. That was the point." He winced at his own harsh tone; he hadn't meant it like that.

Rinoa jerked back as if he'd struck her. "So you admit you were with that bitch!"

Squall felt his temper snap, as her tone grated against his last nerve. "The only bitch I know right now is you, Rinoa. If you aren't going to calm down and stop the name calling, I suggest you leave."

He regretted the words almost as soon as they'd left him. He was too angry and too proud to apologize, however, as Rinoa stood abruptly. Her eyes flashed at him, her hand raised as if she were about to slap him again. Uttering a guttural cry, she stomped past him and out the door. He could almost hear the slam she would have made if a sliding door were capable of such a feat.

Somewhat relieved but ultimately feeling like he was going to cry, Squall let go of the breath he'd been holding. Shedding his jacket, he slipped into his small bathroom and groaned at his reflection in the mirror. It was no wonder Zell had taken pity on him.

His hands shook as he fished for a vial of painkilling potion to dull the ache behind his eyes, knowing that nothing was going to dull the pain in his chest. He washed it down with tap water.

Stumbling blindly for his bed, he collapsed upon it, tracing his scar, wondering how he was going to get through to her. He'd blown it, had messed up so badly, how could he ever hope to fix it?

Resolving to grovel, to beg—to tie her down and make her listen—he barely noticed as his exhaustion won out and sleep claimed him.

-oooOooo-

**AN:** Sorry about the delay in posting. Reviews are much appreciated.

Thanks to Kimmae, and the rest.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Let me introduce you to the end

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, June 15, 082 ALC, 09:00 Hours_

Nichole threw one arm haphazardly over her aching eyes while the other groped for the clock causing the infernal racket that had awakened her. Hitting the snooze button once more, she snuggled back into her pillow, closing her eyes against the sun's bright invasive rays.

She was too tired to get up and close the blinds, too tired even to turn off the alarm that had been waking her up every thirty minutes since six am. As she fell back into the restless sleep that plagued her, a pounding arose in her head.

Oddly there was no pain, and she wondered disjointedly how her head could be pounding without it. A voice called out, the words muffled but the intent clear and suddenly she knew that it wasn't her head pounding but someone's fist on the door.

"Just a minute!" she slurred, stumbling out of bed. She slapped her hand on the release pad and promptly lost what little balance she had as the door dutifully slid open under her hand. She managed to regain her bearings just as Adrian sauntered in.

"Sure, I'd like you to come in, thanks so much for asking," she mumbled irritably as the door shut and a great yawn overcame her.

Adrian smiled. "You look like shit." Unconsciously she reached for her hair trying to smooth it down, cursing herself as Adrian smirked. "That's really not going to help." Snatching her hand down, she stepped around him to the blinds, closing them a bit before turning to him.

"What do you want, Adrian?" Her tone was icy as she stepped carefully over the still-slumbering Griever. He raised an eyebrow and she had the distinct feeling she'd walked headlong into a trap.

"I want a lot of things," he said, flashing the grin that always made her feel weak and girly. She hated it, hated the feelings it brought out in her. Sighing, she leaned against her desk.

"Look, I'm not really in the mood for jokes this morning so if you don't have anything important to say, just get out." She sounded unnecessarily harsh even to her own ears and she fought the urge to cringe.

"Excuse me, Your Highness, your lowly messenger has just come to tell you that your brother requests your presence in the Quad."

She hung her head, embarrassed, thinking she should apologize but unable to form the words.

Adrian quirked his eyebrows but said nothing as he walked to the door. "Oh, and Nichole—" She looked up. "—You might want to clean up first. You look like you got hit by a train."

"Out! Get out!" she screeched, but he was already gone, his rich laughter mocking her. "Lowly messenger indeed, damn jerk." Yanking her nightshirt over her head, she threw it in the general direction of the dirty clothes hamper, her pants and under-things following in short fashion.

Stepping into the bathroom and shutting the door behind her, she jumped in surprise at the sight that greeted her in the full-length mirror. Her eyes were enveloped by large dark circles and her hair looked like a bird had nested in it while she slept.

Reluctantly, she admitted that Adrian was right; she did look like a wreck, but she sure as hell wasn't going to admit it to him.

After her shower, what to wear on her first day as a SeeD bothered her. She couldn't wear the student uniform she was so familiar with and the official uniform was much too formal. She didn't have much by the way of casual attire and less that would suit well in battle.

Her eyes rested on the leather Anne had bought her as a joke. It was a matching set, tank top and pants in supple black leather that fit like a glove. Anne had said it would protect her well enough if she wore it in combat and it'd knock Adrian dead. Nichole had laughed and banished the outfit to the back of her closet.

It would have to do. She took it out along with a long-sleeved white shirt and slipped into it. It certainly was formfitting. Looking in the mirror, she wasn't sure if it'd be enough to catch Adrian's attention as Anne had suggested. Not that that was the goal of course, her mind protested habitually. The words rang false even in her head.

The halls were littered with students and SeeDs in varying states of upheaval. Summer break was upon them. The holiday where for six precious weeks everyone who wanted it was granted leave. Originally it had been established to appease the families of the children who attended the year-round boarding school. Now almost everyone took the break as a time to unwind from the harsh realities of life at Garden.

Nichole had never seen a point to it and as such, never requested leave. Turning away from the commotion, she headed for the Quad. As she reached the pale pink carpet leading to her destination she hesitated, leaning on the wooden rail, wondering why she was rushing to do as her brother bid. What was so damn important that he'd sent Adrian of all people?

He knew exactly why she tried to avoid the Jerk... What was with the thinly veiled attempts to throw them together lately? It didn't seem like something Tobias would do. Anne, maybe, but not serious-to-a-fault Tobias. And both of them should know better. Anytime she was thrown into Adrian's path she just ended up pissed off and hurt.

Even after his heroic rescue at Trabia, he had turned right around and ignored her. Not that she'd had time to notice. Garden's casualties had seemed unending, and in the wreckage she had discovered a body she simply hadn't been ready for, Anne's boyfriend, Jason.

She hadn't believed it, even with him lying dead before her, she couldn't reconcile why Jason would be there, underneath the rubbish, when he was supposed to be with the Disciplinary Committee.

Anne had been devastated by the news, but more than that, she had been livid. During the attack Jeremiah had lied to her, telling her that Jason had been called off to help the Garden staff. When Anne confronted him, he admitted that he'd helped Jason to slip off and follow after Adrian. In all the commotion none of them had thought to question why Jason wasn't around.

"He was stupid," Jeremiah had said, "risking his life for your brother. But Jason always did get crazy over a nice rack."

Anne's right hook had laid him flat, and Nichole's only regret was that she wasn't there to witness it. Jeremiah had been unwelcome in the group after that, which Nichole had been ever grateful for, and normalcy had slowly crept into their lives again.

Those who were lost would never be forgotten, but life continued on.

Taking a deep breath, she turned and headed for the heart of the Quad. Tobias had waited long enough.

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, June 15, 082 ALC, 08:30 Hours_

By six a.m. Quistis had known that she was going to have a bad day. Being awoken by Rinoa screaming at the top of her lungs about some tramp Squall had been intimate with was just the start. After fighting to get back to sleep for a half-hour she'd given up, chalking up her migraine to cosmic cruelty.

After listening to Rinoa's side of the argument for so long—Squall's responses were too quiet to carry through the wall between their dorms—she swallowed down a pain potion and commended Squall for having the patience of a saint.

To her, Rinoa was simply being ridiculous. Just the thought of Squall doing anything with anyone but Rinoa was laughable; the man didn't have a disloyal bone in his body. The pulsing pain in her head, however, kept her from fully caring about her next-door neighbor's womanizing ways, except to the extent that she wished Rinoa would just shut up already and leave.

Finally, after about an hour Squall lost his temper, throwing Rinoa out, and silence had blissfully descended upon Quistis' world once more.

Then at seven-thirty—just as she'd fallen back asleep—the boy she'd met the night before, Tobias, had shown up. She'd vaguely remembered agreeing to breakfast the night prior but hadn't expected him to be _that_ early. As it was, she taken one look at the smiling man and had promptly let the sliding door shut in his face.

She'd felt bad almost immediately for taking her frustration out on the poor guy and had relented after a few moments, opening the door to see if he was still there. The comical open-mouthed shock on his face was almost enough to pull her out of her foul mood.

"I'm sorry," she said.

He smiled disarmingly. "It's okay. We'll start over. Would you like to come to breakfast with me?" he asked, extending his hand.

She briefly looked down at her attire; it wasn't her worst pajama ensemble but she'd still feel a little out of place going in the peach spandex shorts and simple tank. It would send the Trepies—her somewhat irritating fan group—into fits. "Why don't you go on ahead, I'll be there in less than twenty."

When the door shut again he'd had a wide smile on his face and she was fighting against the waves of pain radiating from the base of her skull. After another dose of potion and a quick shower she felt vaguely human. Throwing on her typical long peach suede skirt and zippered tank, she wondered why she'd said yes to begin with.

Tobias hadn't even been on her radar during the orphanage days. She remembered him; he was often around when Nichole—her roommate for her last year at the orphanage—was, but beyond knowing who he was, she hadn't interacted with him much.

It was curious that he seemed to specifically seek her out at the Graduation Ball, even more so that he'd asked if she'd eat with him the next morning. Maybe that was why she had said yes; it was hard to turn down a mystery.

Breakfast was actually pretty decent mainly since the potion had kicked in as they ate, getting rid of her pain. Her partner seemed to sense her mood and most of the meal was spent in silence.

As they cleared the plates she realized that she still hadn't found out why he'd asked her out in the first place. "Would you like to go to the Quad?" she asked. "I was hoping we could talk."

"Sure," he replied.

She took him to one of the more public benches, and they sat, the uncomfortable silence reigning between them.

"There you are!" called a short woman with deep brown eyes set perfectly into an aristocratic face. Her raven hair just brushed her shoulders, and the straps of a low-cut black tank top that emphasized her voluptuous curves. She tapped her foot, placing her hands at the waist of her green khaki cargo pants. "I was looking everywhere for you. I thought you were supposed to be at breakfast?"

Quistis flushed. "I'm sorry. I invited him here."

Tobias spoke before the newcomer could get a word in. "What did you need, Anne?" he asked, before seeming to change his mind, turning back to Quistis. "This is Anne Sprite, I'm not sure if you remember her. She's Adrian's sister and hung with him and Seifer most of the time."

Quistis barely recognized her; she'd grown quite a bit since Quistis had last seen her. "I remember… you tended to hang in the background during Squall/Seifer altercations."

"Their fights were stupid," Anne supplied.

"They always have been." Quistis smiled. "It seems they might have finally gotten past it, though. Seifer's around here if you end up wanting to see him," she said, remembering that Anne had followed around Seifer in the same fashion that she had stalked Squall.

Anne shrugged. "If I see him, fine, but I won't seek him out. The past is where it belongs."

"Do you know if Nichole is awake yet?" Tobias asked, interrupting the somewhat awkward silence.

"No," Anne answered. "Last time I checked she was still asleep. She seemed pretty hyped up about something last night. She probably stayed up too late."

"We should wake her up; she's missing her morning routine," Tobias said.

Anne laughed. "Just because you live for your schedule doesn't mean that she has to. But you're right, if she doesn't get up soon she'll end up sleeping the day away. I can't do it, though, I'm off for a date with Gavin. I'm supposed to meet him in the Cafeteria and then I think we're heading out to Balamb Harbor to help the people recover from the storm that hit last night." She shook her head. "Of course that's_ just_ what I want to be doing on a first date, _really_. You couldn't have… you know, given him a suggestion or something? I mean, at least our first date was fun, Red… but I suppose I can coerce Adrian into fetching her. It's always interesting to hear the results."

Quistis couldn't count the number of times she'd found Nichole crying in their room after a bout of Adrian's malicious teasing. "You mean you actually force Nichole to deal with Adrian?" she asked. "He was so horrible to her when we were kids."

Anne smiled. "Oh, don't worry about her. Nichole can hold her own. Besides, we have a theory that his motivation for being mean isn't to hurt her, and hasn't been for a very long time."

"What do you mean?" Quistis asked.

"Well, we know for a fact that he gets upset if she's really hurt. Almost more than I do, so that's clue number one," Tobias answered.

"Yep," Anne added, "like when she passed out after the SeeD test. He stayed with her the entire time she was out—three days in a little hard plastic infirmary chair. And then he wouldn't let the Garden staff pester her about what she'd done during the test. He wouldn't even let us bug her about it, which was really disappointing because something crazy weird happened, but either way it was just so sweet!"

"Wait a minute," Quistis said trying to get to the heart of the matter, "you think he has feelings for her?"

"Not just feelings," Anne clarified. "He's head over heels crazy about her. Of course he won't admit it, and still treats her like she's scum on his boots to keep his distance, but there's no denying the facts."

"Problem is…" Tobias interjected, "because of the way he's treated her, she never believes that he has feelings for her. Everyone else knows he's running scared, but she's convinced he hates her, and only ever treats her with kindness because he's obligated or some other such nonsense."

Anne nodded. "He's done a really good job at showing her that he'll never be anything but a confusing jerk."

"I wish he would just get over himself long enough to tell her how he feels. Then I wouldn't have to deal with their fights and Nichole's moping."

"Listen to him." Anne scoffed. "He's _such_ a romantic! Let's set them up so I don't have to deal with her… _Humph_!" She glared at Tobias before leaning conspiratorially towards Quistis. "I suppose I should be grateful that he's agreed to help me at all. Sometimes I think he could care less about his sister," she stage-whispered.

"Hey!" Tobias snapped. "I resent that. I care, it's just… she's so different, it's hard. I don't want to see her hurt though, so you better keep a tight leash on that brother of yours and your own matchmaking aspirations."

"Oh come on, I know my brother… we just have to give him a push or ten in the right direction."

Tobias sighed. "Fine, but I don't want either you or Nichole to come crying to me when this all blows up in your face. I know she's harboring feelings for him; if he gets serious with the insults, she'll be devastated."

"Don't worry about it. Although it's nice to hear that you care. I think it's more likely they'll get it over with and kiss each other senseless."

Quistis agreed with Tobias. Even _if _Adrian felt something, they were pushing for disaster. Meddling in other people's love affairs rarely turned out well. Anne bid them farewell and left for her date with the mystery man named Gavin, promising to waylay Adrian en route.

"So what had you upset earlier?" Tobias inquired gently.

"Nothing important," Quistis replied, not really wanting to get into it. "I'm sorry I wasn't very good company."

He shrugged. "It's not every day I get to have breakfast with a beautiful girl." The comment was stated as a fact rather than a compliment but Quistis couldn't stop the heat that turned her cheeks rosy.

He had definitely grown from her vague memories of a scrawny kid with wild hair. He was taller than her now and almost classically handsome, with a strong square jaw that offset his sharp features. His hair was short and cut severely but still managed to be somewhat unruly.

Increasingly aware of his solid male presence she squirmed. He either ignored or missed her discomfort, asking her how her life had been since they'd last met.

She wasn't aware of how long they chatted. He was intelligent, funny, and easy to talk to. It was an irresistible combination and Quistis found that she was content for perhaps the first time in weeks. She was in the middle of a more detailed explanation of how the SeeD Ranking system worked when he interrupted her, looking over her shoulder.

"Morning, Nichole. What took you so long?"

Quistis turned, catching her first glimpse of her now grown roommate. She was still short, an inch or so below Quistis' own height. Her features had developed a little and even though she was a little plain, the sharp amber eyes and dark auburn hair that she shared with her brother gave her an interesting quality.

"I had to kick Adrian out of my dorm this morning; you wouldn't happen to know about that, would you, Tobias?" Nichole asked, her tone as cool as ice.

Tobias didn't quite pull of the innocent look, and Quistis wondered if the girl was more aware of the plans surrounding her and her archenemy than Anne or Tobias guessed. Nichole glared at her sibling until he threw his hands up in defeat. "Honestly, Nichole, it was Anne's idea. You know she's the only one that can get Adrian to do anything that has to do with you. He was probably going that way when she and Gavin caught him and asked him to do it."

Quistis held back a giggle at the blatant lie, letting it escape only when Nichole growled in frustration. The girl turned to her in obvious confusion.

"I'm sorry, I can tell you don't recognize me. My name is Quistis Trepe. We were roommates at the orphanage in Centra before I was adopted." Quistis extended her hand.

Nichole looked flummoxed then slowly recognition washed over her face. "Quisty!" she exclaimed, pulling Quistis into a hug. "Oh, wow! I mean, I never expected to see you here of all places! I thought the foster family that took you lives in Galbadia."

"They do, but I was sent here when this place opened up. It's been my home for almost ten years."

"Quistis has been busy here in Balamb," Tobias supplied. "She became the youngest instructor ever before becoming a hero of the Sorceress War. Now she holds the title of Assistant Commander."

Quistis blushed, wondering just where he'd gotten that particular information from. She certainly hadn't told him. She rarely mentioned her previous instructing position, as whenever she thought of that particular job, the failure she'd felt washed over her again. Still, it was flattering that he'd taken the time to learn about her.

"Tobias and I were just catching up." Quistis smiled at him before turning to Nichole. "I missed you at the ball last night. Plus, I noted that our beloved Commander himself had already headed your way."

Nichole shook her head. "Commander?"

"Squall was named Commander of SeeD during the war, and has held the position after leading us in triumph over the Sorceress."

Tobias whistled. "He's really made something out of himself, hasn't he?"

Nichole nodded, looking a little dumbstruck before Tobias started up a conversation about just when Gavin had asked Anne out. It was strained and awkward for a couple of seconds before they found a rhythm, and Quistis saw why Tobias felt like their relationship was hard. There seemed to be some kind of disconnect between them. It was almost as if some sort of switch had been turned off, leaving them groping blindly as they tried not to offend the other.

It happened so fast Quistis barely registered it. One second Nichole was standing next to her chatting animatedly with Tobias, the next she was on the floor with Rinoa standing triumphantly over her—hands still outstretched. The hair on the back of Quistis' neck stood on end as Rinoa cackled madly. Something was terribly wrong.

"You slut! I've heard about you," Rinoa spat. "They say you're a freak, that you're so easy you even spread em' for your own cousin."

"Rinoa!" Quistis called out, wondering what had gotten into the girl.

"Well, you can't have him, you bitch! You hear me? He's mine!" Rinoa kicked out, aiming for the girl's stomach. Nichole brought her legs up at the last second, absorbing the blow.

Quistis rushed forward, pulling the angry Sorceress away from the girl. "Rinoa, what's gotten into you?" she asked, knowing that wherever Rinoa had heard that particular rumor, it had to be wrong.

Her head snapped back, the slap resounding in her ears.

"You whore!" Rinoa screamed. "I should have known you'd be on her side. You were always lusting after him. Well, no longer. He's mine. All mine!"

Holding her stinging cheek, Quistis wondered if Rinoa had lost her mind. There was no other explanation for the behavior she was witnessing. She was so preoccupied she didn't even see the blast coming. The Quad flew by at a reckless pace before she landed in a heap on the far side of the courtyard. The impact knocked the breath out of her and she couldn't do anything but watch as Tobias was flung away, smashing the back of his head on a stone railing. His momentum carried him over it where he landed with a splash in the stream below.

Quistis struggled to see if he was alright, but couldn't move; something was holding her.

Nichole wasn't faring much better. She was on her feet but seemed to be frozen, while the Sorceress circled her like a lion stalking its prey.

Rinoa smiled, whipping around to scan the area, before raising her arms. A flash of jewelry caught Quistis' eye; the Odine Bangle still encircled the girl's wrist. Before Quistis could determine how Rinoa was performing such magic with it on, she turned again, speaking to Nichole. "This time you will die and everyone will know exactly what you are; a whore, a common plaything, nothing more."

Her voice was off, raspy and deep, and fear clenched Quistis' heart. Terror reflected in Nichole's eyes as Rinoa called, and lightning struck. Nichole twitched and shuddered under the force, her body sagging but unable to fall.

Quistis wondered where Rinoa had gotten the ability to cast such spells as she fought against what bound her. Rinoa's attention flashed to her seconds before the lightning followed. An echo of her pained scream etched into her mind, but no sound escaped Quistis' throat.

Rinoa fixated back on Nichole, giving Quistis respite from the nerve shattering assault of her powers. Air flooded her lungs as she took in one breath after another, warily watching the Sorceresses progress.

Nichole seemed lifeless, suspended like a puppet on strings, her eyes dull and glassy. Rinoa stepped behind her, her weapon—the Shooting Star—flashing against Nichole's pale throat.

A drop of crimson trailed down a white blade and the irony of the image was horrifying; the devil had angels' wings.

A silver-red light burst from Nichole, tossing Rinoa back into a bench. Nichole fell and the magic holding Quistis gave.

It was only a split second for Quistis to decide that Tobias was in the more immediate danger before she was on her feet, running for where she'd seen him hit the water. There… he was just barely clinging to the support beam where the path crossed over the stream.

She went to help him and found that she couldn't; Rinoa had caught her once more. Her eyes swiveled in the Sorceress' direction. Lightning flashed; her vision went white as the electricity ripped through her over and over again.

She screamed soundlessly, gasping for air; her vision flickered then died as her nerves overloaded and shorted-out.

She could feel her systems shutting down, knew her death was imminent. But then the spell just stopped. She dragged in one harsh, painful, breath after another; her eyes opening upon a world of blurred, colorless shapes.

"Rinoa! What's gotten into you, man?" Quistis heard Zell yell and the sound of his voice was the sweetest thing she'd ever heard. The cavalry had arrived.

Quistis tried to call out, to warn him of the danger, but already it was too late. Quistis heard a sickening crunch and the wet rip of bone tearing through flesh before all was silent once more. She prayed with all of her being that it wasn't his skull that had made such a sound, but couldn't turn to look.

A dark shadow entered her vision, bending to examine the unconscious girl a few yards in front of her. The spell holding Quistis in place suddenly disappeared, sending her crashing to the floor in a heap. She whimpered in pain, drawing the attention of who she guessed must be Squall, but before he could do more than look at her, Rinoa spoke. "Come, my lion, give the girl to me," she beseeched, her voice normal again.

Squall shook his head, turning back to the girl on the floor, placing himself between Nichole's prone form and the out-of-control Sorceress beyond.

Rinoa tried again. "Come, give her to me—or is she really that important to you? Is _she_ more important than me, your Sorceress?"

Squall shook his head once more but it was staggered as he bent down to Nichole, and for one short terrifying second Quistis thought he would do as Rinoa bid. "Squall…" she tried to shout, but her voice came out in a pained whisper.

"Stay out of this!" Rinoa screamed at her before turning back to Squall. "Answer me, Squall!" she demanded.

"I won't let you hurt them," Squall whispered furiously, rising to his feet.

"Oh, Hyne, you really are going to choose her, aren't you? What is it, Squall? I wasn't good enough for you? Well, we'll just take care of our little problem and then things will go back as they were, as they were meant to be."

A dark light hurtled toward Nichole. Quistis feared it would hit her but at the last second a flash of bright blue reflected the dark beam.

Squall's voice carried throughout the Quad, his tone full of fury. "You are no longer my Sorceress; leave this Garden."

Rinoa cackled wildly, answering in the deep raspy voice that sent chills down Quistis' spine. "Why, I believe the little lion is serious! My, my, how the tides have turned. Don't worry, little lion, I have other uses for you. I won't kill you now. Your companions, however, well… we'll just see about them."

Quistis screamed; her harsh cry echoing off the walls. Her body seized, spasming under the electric current. She could feel her end closing in and welcomed it, knowing that in it she'd find a blissful release.

Footsteps echoed down the corridor, announcing the arrival of more SeeDs. "It seems my time here has ended," the voice of insanity intoned. "I will be back though, don't fret, little lion. The girl is mine, and she will die!"

Quistis sagged with the removal of the spell. Rinoa cackled madly in that horrible voice and a powerful rush of magic washed over her abused senses. A split second later the presence of the Sorceress simply disappeared and all that remained of her passing was the laugh still echoing off of the Quad walls.

-oooOooo-

**AN**: Thanks to Kimmae, the most wonderful beta anyone could ask for. Special thanks to my number one alpha and thanks ZeroPanda.


	7. Chapter 7

******AN:** Sorry about the long delay. I hope to be back on a Monday posting schedule from now on. Thanks as usual to Kimmae and the rest.

**Warning: Rated M for mentions of sexual abuse and rape.**

**Chapter Seven**

And I feel the cold wind blowing beneath my wings

_Location Unknown, June 27, Time Unknown_

There were no walls, no light; only miles and miles of a darkness so black she couldn't see her hand an inch before her face. She had never been one to fear the dark but this… this was different. It was as if her surroundings were alive. Like the darkness itself was hunting her.

She was in a nightmare.

It was the only explanation. A prison would have walls, tangible barriers, but this... this was madness.

She was unaware of how much time she had spent in this place, only that it seemed to pass sluggishly and yet all at once. Terror was her constant. She was prey running from the wolves biting at her heels. Slowing only when her lungs heaved with the effort of drawing in air, and rationality overrode her survival reflexes long enough for her to think.

She collapsed again, breathing heavily, folding her arms across her torso in an effort to contain her sobs.

Fear drove her, but in the end despair always won.

She prayed for an end to the madness; for the darkness to clear. For someone, anyone, to hear her plea and rescue her from this awful place. Once again, there was no answer.

The urge to move became a tangible weight. The dark hadn't harmed her, but she couldn't convince herself that it wouldn't. It was just biding its time. Waiting for her to surrender. Then it would pounce.

She forced herself to walk; the pace she'd been setting would only tire her out faster. She hadn't slept since she'd come to this place, she didn't even know if one could sleep in a dream. Exhaustion bogged down her every step, but she pressed on.

Was that way a little lighter?

She examined her surroundings more thoroughly. It was probably her mind playing tricks on her, but any hope was better than none at all.

Switching direction she stepped toward the area, and the inky darkness directly in front of her dispersed. She rubbed her eyes, sure that she was seeing things.

She took a tentative step into the gray, wondering if this was some trick. A second later she was sure it was as the dark rushed in, filling the gap behind her.

She ran.

Her heart pounded in her ears. Her lungs wheezed with the effort of drawing in air. Her legs shook from the strain, but she was driven on.

She stumbled, her knees skidding along the ground. Her eyes slammed shut as she braced herself, expecting at any moment for the dark to crush her. After a few seconds of heart wrenching terror she opened them and was surprised to find that rather than overtaking her, the black simply hovered around the square of gray she occupied.

Feeling like a fool, she collapsed, tears running down her cheeks while she laughed humorlessly.

A path of gray opened up, marking the way. She hesitated for a moment, gazing at her hands. Whatever was ahead couldn't be worse than what was behind.

She was so very wrong.

A small, weak light flickered in the distance. She hurried toward it, but then realized that it was flying toward her. Before she could blink it was upon her, hitting her in a blinding flash.

-oooOooo-

_She was flat on her back, her jaw aching. Peering up through half-closed eyes, she could just make out the massive man hovering over her. She tried to get up, to fall into a defensive stance but her limbs ignored her command. _

_Abruptly someone else's fear overrode her own. She thrashed, trying to bite, kick, scream, none of it having any effect. She remained as she was; frozen, her eyes glued to the man removing his leather belt. The huge decorative buckle gleamed under the light, the Galbadian crest. _

_The man sneered. "I'll teach you not to lie to me, bitch!"_

_Her mind was invaded by thoughts that were, and yet somehow were not, hers and she knew then that the body she was stuck in was her own. Not the Garden trained SeeD of twenty-one, but a fear-paralyzed child. _

_She rolled over as the belt came down. The crack echoed; her body trembled, a whimper escaped. The pattern continued, each blow tearing her apart. The child was lost to it, retreating into her mind, trying desperately to find that happy place where each blow was a mere bee-sting, where it was all a dream and she would wake up at any moment. The adult knew better._

_The man began to grunt and moan, the strikes slowing. She wondered if it would soon be over, but the child's terror only grew. She couldn't focus, couldn't breathe as the horror of the girl's thoughts became her own._

_The belt fell, hitting the ground with a resounding thunk, even as the zipper dropped. Her tear-swollen eyes shut; the man flipped her, tearing off what was left of her clothes._

_Her head slammed against the floor and she saw stars, but then another pain overwhelmed everything else. Her screams echoed, in her head, around the room, as her body was cleaved in two. A moment later she knew no more._

_When she came to the man had finished, and was face down, snoring in a drunken stupor. She moaned, pushing herself up, the need to get away from him pushing her beyond the breaking point. The room spun; her stomach churned, the iron-sweet smell of her blood clouded her nostrils, but somehow she managed to stagger for the door._

_Oblivion called her but she ignored its lure, seeking the safety of her room. She stumbled on until she lurched over the threshold. Her body collapsed, falling even as the door shut behind her. _

_Whimpering in a pool of blood and pain she willed the darkness to come; prayed for death to take her and smiled as her world went black._

-oooOooo-

Suddenly she was back. Sobs racked her; bile hit the back of her throat. Hugging her knees, she curled into a ball, rocking herself against the pain and violation.

She had forgotten… how had she forgotten? She knew the end of the story now, knew everything that had been missing from her memories for so long.

She had been nine years old, and while it hadn't been the first time the man had touched her, it had been the first he'd gone so far. Two days after the incident she had awoken cold, weak, and alone; wondering why her prayers for death had gone unanswered. The next day she had opened the door to find a man on her doorstep.

He introduced himself as a social worker, explained that there was an accident and he was there to take her to an orphanage where she would live and play with other children. She had been afraid, leery to go with the stranger but anything was better than the thought of facing that man, her uncle, again.

She'd fallen asleep on the journey to Centra and had woken up on the orphanage steps with no memory of her past, or how she'd gotten there. She knew only her name.

A masculine voice spoke in the darkness, "That was for the best, you know… There was too much at stake for you to remember, to carry out your wish for death."

_Huh? _"Who… who are you?" she asked timidly, peering into the darkness.

"Now that's the question, isn't it? What would you like to know? My name would tell you little, my occupation more, and my importance… well, that would tell you nothing."

"All three, if you please," she asked, turning in a circle, trying to figure out where the man was hiding.

He laughed and it echoed around her, seeming to come from everywhere at once. "Ah, we have a smart one here! Not surprising, really, as you are who you come from. Always too simplistic, though. the question you should be asking is: Who are you?"

"What do you mean? Just answer the question…" Why was he being so evasive?

"As to that, I suppose since this is your consciousness, I can give you that courtesy. My name… you can call me Xavier. My occupation in the scheme of the universe, quite simply, is that I am an angel. As to my importance… less so now, but more so before."

"Angels don't exist." The denial was automatic; she denied it as she would have denied the existence of the tooth fairy, or any number of such fairy-tale creatures.

The citizens of Gaea lived in a world of magic. It was a fact. Garden simply trained those citizens that had an aptitude to utilize that magic in a very scientific manner. There was no room in that training for the superstitious belief in fairies, demons, or even angels. Most of those in Garden didn't even believe that Hyne was a god. It was taught that Hyne was simply the first person on Gaea with an aptitude for magic great enough that other humans called her a Sorceress.

Xavier chuckled. "And they'd all be wrong. I do exist, and so,too, do the others, except for the tooth fairy—don't know _where_ humans come up with that rot. We aren't the fanciful creatures bandied about in whatever stories humans are making up these days. Of course, we do have these cursed wings to deal with."

"Where are you?" she asked, tired of talking to someone she couldn't see.

"Oh yes, physical form… sorry, is this better?" The outline of a man appeared in the darkness before he stepped fully onto the gray path.

He… well… _glowed_, was probably the best term for it. His aura surrounded him, dark as their surroundings, but somehow visible and flashing with hints of blue and purple. She recognized him instantly. He was the man who had taken her from her uncle.

His wings, for he did indeed have them, were dark and barely visible in the gloom. He was breathtakingly beautiful, with perfect aristocratic features and beautiful dark brown eyes. His long dark hair flowed freely over his shoulders and onto his crisp linen shirt.

His hair had been shorter the last time she'd seen him, and he hadn't had the wings, but all in all, it was twelve years later and he hadn't aged one bit. "Of course I haven't aged… I'm an angel, we're immortal." He tossed his hair over his shoulder.

_And vain… must add vain_.

He laughed. "I'll just ignore that last comment. We are in your consciousness right now. Anything that you think is broadcast around, just as anything you intend to speak comes out like you were actually speaking it."

_Great…_ "Wait, since this is my mind couldn't I just think away the darkness?"

"No, not at this time, but your pleas for help created enough of a rift to allow me to penetrate it; it's a good beginning."

"What do you mean? Why can't I do anything about it if this is my mind? And why is it dark anyway? I'm not the sunniest person in the world but I wouldn't expect it to be black in here."

"It's dark because darkness causes confusion and fear; that's just how she works. You can't do anything about it because you don't have the power yet to manipulate the type of energy that is clouding your mind. My presence will eventually break her hold as at the moment she isn't powerful enough to keep us both trapped. In the meantime, there are some things that you should be made aware of."

"Who is 'she?'"

"So demanding… " He frowned. "She is Valora, an angel of great power. You do not know of her, but she has known of you since your birth. Still, we couldn't be sure until she targeted you and the pieces fell into place. It seems chaos truly does reside in the female mind."

"Umm, okay... so this Valora, is an angel like you? Why is she targeting me? For that matter, why are you here?"

He grinned. "Good questions but I am limited in how much I can answer. We are in a game, you see. Powers beyond us have designed it, and we are but characters played for their amusement."

"I'm not anyone's pawn."

He scoffed at her comment, but otherwise ignored it. "I can answer but one question, the ultimate question you might say; the question of who you are."

What kind of a question was that? She knew who she was. What she wanted to know was why she was there, what did all of this have to do with her, and how was she talking with this… _person_ inside her mind?

He sighed. "You are here because you are currently in a coma caused by the injuries you sustained while under the Sorceress' assault, and you're kept here by the spell Valora has woven. I expect she was hoping to play one of her twisted games after showing you that blissful little flashback, but I was able to circumvent it. Does that answer your question sufficiently? If you would only ask the right question I could say more."

"That still doesn't answer anything."

"Stubborn girl." He sneered. "I don't know why we didn't see it from the start. Such a short-tempered, inconsistent shrew, and yet somehow you draw them all in. I don't understand it. She never had that ability, at most she was tolerated, never loved."

She wasn't quite sure what he was talking about; she'd been insulted, that much was clear, but the rest... The term bat-shit-crazy came to mind.

"Haha. I like it! Perhaps they find you funny. Oh, well, it is of no consequence." He turned, looking from side to side. "Now, if you want any other answers, you will have to ask the right question. As I've said, this is somewhat like a game, and only the 'magic words' will release the information you seek."

The guy was definitely half-baked, but there was little else to do but play along. At least she wasn't alone anymore, even if what her mind had conjured left much to be desired.

"Fine, we'll play your game; now what was the question you could answer again?"

"Who you are."

She sighed. "Who am I?"

"Now that is the question! You are special, of course."

Oh, Hyne. She was getting the 'you're special in your own right' talk from an angel of all things. Was she really that pathetic? Seriously, that was what he wanted to say so badly?

"No, no, I don't mean it in that way." He shook his head. "I mean that by your very birth you have defied the laws of the Creator. You are a hybrid, a cross between two great powers, Sorceress and angel."

She'd heard of Hyne; a Sorceress that many religions across Gaea worshiped as they would a god, but, "The Creator?"

"The Creator is just that: a being of unlimited power whose sole purpose is to create. At the beginning of this universe there were six gods, six powers that ruled all. These gods each had an aspect—their sole function—and each was gifted with minions to aid them in their role. The Creator is the oldest of them all; he, in fact, bore the others. His sole function is to create… universes, worlds, gods."

"So are you, the angels I mean, minions of this Creator?"

He nodded. "We are servants to his calling, created to fulfill a specific purpose of his choosing. I was created to rule over the power of one of his brethren. Five others shared my task, each ruling an aspect. You see, the Creator made a mistake in the birth of his brothers. He formed them into everything that he was, all-powerful, but also fallible. They warred between each other, each vying for dominance, but it was when they joined forces and began to undo all that he had done that the Creator was forced to take action.

"Unable to do anything to go against his calling, he was forced to create a solution, and in the end he bound the aspects to physical towers above this plane; beyond the realm of their influence. This new space became known as the High Plane, it stretches endlessly across the universe, joining all of the Creators work."

"Okay, so the Creator made this 'High Plane.' What does that have to do with me?"

"I will get to it. The story is long and the time grows short. Please limit your questions as much as possible."

"Sure, whatever, just get on with it."

He turned on his heel, pacing a little ways before circling back. "When the Creator bound his siblings, some of his own power was also linked to a tower, creating balance. He was unsatisfied by this outcome as it severely limited his own power, but what he had done could not be undone."

"The strongest of the gods' servants were bound with them, now the living vessels of their master's aspects—you could call them Guardians I suppose—and for a time things prospered."

He crossed his arms, his dark eyes peering at her. "But all good things must come to an end.

"The Creator grew weaker by the century, his power draining into the physical prison of the tower. His brethren, still angered by their entrapment, were undoing his work faster than he could create it and with his power split between two planes he was unable to counter them as he should. It was then that he decided that he needed a god, one who wasn't limited in the ways that he was, one that would forever honor his great design, forever placing it above all else.

"He created Hyne, a partner in his image, a goddess above all others, the perfect balance of power. She was his most treasured creation, and her purpose was to carry out his will on the High Plane as he fulfilled his function in the realm below."

"So Hyne really is a goddess, then?" she asked. "So why is she called a Sorceress?"

He smiled. "We'll get to that. Hyne and the Creator ruled the planes for millennia, each keeping to their tasks, but working ever in tandem. It was a little over five thousand years ago that things turned ugly. Hyne had grown lonely, become bored with her eternal watch over the Creator's work and she wished for something of her own; to cherish, to love as the Creator loved. She wanted her creations to be special, to be like her with the balance of all aspects within them and so she went to the towers, asking the sleeping gods for their blessings.

"One by one the towers agreed, giving her works their graces, until but one was left. He above all of the others strained against his imprisonment and when such an opportunity for revenge was presented he could not resist. He agreed to give his blessing but instead of the balance she had asked for, he used his power to negate everything that the others did.

"Hyne finished her creations but they were not as she'd expected. They were base, fragile creatures; ultimately flawed. Still, she loved them above all else, even the Creator, and so when he passed judgment that her mistakes should not live, she denied him, fighting with him for the first time in her existence.

"She lost, but she won their survival. Her children were banished from the High Plane, and sent to a planet teeming with life and plentiful in the resources her children required. It was a young planet, untamed, and the Creator was satisfied. Without the power of the towers so near, the creations would eventually succumb to the burden of their own imbalance. Such a creature could never thrive and all would be right with his design once again.

"Of course he couldn't have guessed that for such fragile creatures, their resilience was unwavering. Hyne knew, and blinded by her love for them, she sought to find a way to keep them alive, to allow them more than just their brief lifetimes to find the balance within themselves. Eventually, she created a Plane of her own, a plane in between planes where her children could live on in spirit until they found their way back to her.

"The Creator wasn't happy with Hyne's rebellion but there was little he could do. His power was slipping away, Hyne's blasphemous creations were more draining than he could have ever imagined. Within them they had the potential for all six aspects, and they used that potential indiscriminately. Hyne knew that it was a problem, but she couldn't act without destroying all that she'd done."

Things started to click together. "You're speaking of humanity."

"Yes, humanity, as they call themselves now. Other races were created and thrived in other solar systems, but humanity has always been Hyne's most cherished. It was they who longed to come back to her. Over time, an idea took root in her mind, that her children could find salvation if they could be led into the balance. To this end she stole the seed of the Creator and placed it within herself in the hopes that a child born directly from them would gain everything that they had, power, eternal life, and above all, balance.

"It was a monumental failure. She bore six daughters, each with an affinity to an aspect, and the potential to use them all. Each just as imbalanced as humanity, but imbued with her power, the power of the gods. Hyne knew they were her greatest mistake, but she couldn't bring herself to be rid of them. Instead she choose to exile them to Gaea where they would live their lives before returning to her in death. She still had hope that they might fulfill their purpose and lead her children back into her light."

"The Sorceresses…" she whispered, completely enthralled. Even if it was all made up by some crazy figment of her imagination, it was a fascinating story.

He nodded. "Hyne's daughters, eventually titled Sorceresses. With their creation the balance of power shifted, some gaining strength while others became weak. The Creator and Hyne did all that they could to restore stability but the towers rebelled. If they fell, if the Creator's work was undone, the aspects would have a chance to be free."

"It couldn't be that simple," she mumbled.

"Indeed, it is not. If the towers were to ever fall, everything we know, everything that the Creator has done will cease to exist.

"In his last great work, he created six angels, each in perfect balance, each with the power to rule over his brothers, and himself. He gifted the tower's Guardians, with the ability to choose which of his servants would suit their aspect best. The Guardians made their decisions and each of the towers were linked to the pinnacle—the chosen angel.

"The Creator, nothing more than a husk of his former self, used the last of his power to create a set of rules. A contract that bound all of his servants. To oversee that the rules were carried out, a Council was formed from the oldest, wisest, and most impartial of his servants. Their purpose is to act in his stead should his work ever become threatened, but they too are limited by certain pacts."

"So what happened to him? The Creator?"

"He allowed himself to be become one with his aspect, bound to his tower for all time, no more powerful than the rest."

"And so you, the angels, just went on with things? How does this explain who I am?"

"Yes, we continued, and I will get to how you came to be shortly. As I said this is a long story and eventually Valora's power over you will fade. Once you wake up I will not be allowed to speak with you further until I am given permission, so please, let me continue."

"By all means..."

"It is after the Creator faded that _our_ story comes to be. The angels ruled the aspects and Hyne ruled the Planes, each working together to continue the great design. Things went on in this manner, uninterrupted for almost four thousand years. Humanity had survived—flourished even. They built grand empires, improved their technologies, and bettered their people, but nothing they ever accomplished was enough to bring them back to Hyne.

"The Sorceresses, Hyne's true daughters, survived as well. Some in the shadows, some in the light, but always six of her daughters retained her powers and lived on. Their story is also long and best saved for a different day. Suffice to say that they were there, and that even diluted by humanity, the blood of Hyne is strong. Power always calls to power, it is the way of all things.

"It was a little over a century ago that everything began to fall apart." He sighed. "Wars ravaged humanity. The Sorceresses were corrupted, feeding off the pain of the children they had been designed to save. Hyne was so despaired by her failures that they consumed her every moment. She became blind to all but them.

"On the precipice of disaster, the towers fought. The minions of the aspects grew restless; the little green planet called to them. Great and small they flooded to the outer reaches, turning its moon red with their numbers. The Guardians forsook their duties, gallivanting off into the unknown. The angels—we held on by threads. Fifteen years passed and things only grew worse, until finally something snapped.

"Eternity, a Guardian of immense power had fled to Gaea during the end days. Whilst there she met and fell in love with a human, but it wasn't just any human, it was a man with the blood of Hyne; an emperor amongst his people. Out of her love, she bore him a child, a gift to humanity, a Guardian all their own. Destiny, the Guardian-child was called, and presented to her sire."

"So there really is a Destiny? Is she blind like the myths say?"

"Yes, at the age of five her father burned her eyes out hoping to stem the visions she had of his empire crumbling into ruin. He feared her, was terrified of the power she held over his people, and ordered that the she should be put to death."

"Eternity was forced to act, to save her daughter's life. Her tears fell ceaselessly, mixing with the blood of her love as she stabbed him through the heart. The liquid turned to crystal, an eternal monument to her pain. The High Plane trembled with her deed, so against the aspect to which she served, and the cracks forming in the foundations of the towers widened. The minions swarming the planet's moon felt the power of Eternity, and could resist no longer. They flooded to the earth below. It was as if the heavens themselves shed tears of blood."

"The Lunar Cry. So the minions, they are monsters? Oh, my, Hyne. The emperor, was he the leader of the Centranian Empire?"

He nodded. "Minions can be of any strength. The lesser are those you call monsters. The greatest are the Guardians and the angels."

"So, GFs... Are they minions?"

"Of a sort. The Guardian Forces on Gaea are remnants. Children, that like Destiny, were born of a union between the Guardians and humanity. Their powers are not so extreme as Destiny's, but their tie to humanity is just as strong. They will often choose to ally themselves with a human born of power if the fancy strikes them."

"So why are they disappearing?"

He grinned. "Good try, but that is a subject best left for another time. For now, you simply need to know that Eternity fled and that Centra, the capital of human innovation, was destroyed."

He continued without pause, "The very fabric of the Creator's work was unraveling. Eternity's tower was irreparably damaged without her, and the angels were wavering under the stress of their burdens. Somehow we toiled on. Hyne was ordered by the Council to leave, to begin the search for Eternity while the angels carried on in her stead.

"Decades passed without respite. With the terrible lack of balance resonating within our souls. We sought comfort elsewhere, traveling to the far reaches of the universes, but no place soothed us as much as the lands of Gaea.

"Humanity had lived on. Now there were many empires and sixty years after the disaster, humanity once again forgot the terribleness of war and sought to dominate each other. It was during this horrible time that the angels had their first contact with the daughters of Hyne.

"Five of us frequented Gaea, together and alone. Each of us eventually met and fell in love with a Sorceress. We were, all of us, happy for the first time in centuries."

He shook his head. "Of course, it was not to last. Two of us had fallen for the same woman and each vied for her time and affections. Before we even knew of our plight, Valora, the sixth angel, cast a spell on us masking our identities to the Sorceress so that she only saw one when the other was near, only heard one voice when the other spoke. We became the same to her and none of us noticed the difference. We were all being played for fools.

"It was said that Valora was love struck over one of the other angels, and when she saw that he was in love with another she was determined to get revenge. To this day I am not sure if that was her true reasoning, but if that's what she wanted she certainly got it in spades.

"A year passed, and we lived in our own little worlds. Taking care of our towers when necessary and taking respite in our lovers whenever possible. Eventually the Sorceresses became with child and within the span of a year six children were born. The first was the child of the weakened pinnacle, one of those duped by Valora, and the last was my child, also part of Valora's game."

"Wait, so you were one of the angels who shared the Sorceress?" She shook her head at his nod. "That's kinda creepy. You weren't the one Valora was in love with, were you?"

He laughed hollowly. "I guess you could say that, and no, Valora loved the other. If she had loved me at that time things would have been very different, but we are getting off topic.

"It was after the birth of the youngest child that Valora chose to spring her trap. She went to the weaker angel and claimed that I had cast a spell on the Sorceress, that I had gotten her with child because I was jealous of him and all that he had.

"He had always been one to strike first and ask questions later, so he attacked. Only telling me the reason through taunts and barbs. I was angry, had been betrayed, but I knew that deceit was not his style, so I held him back as he battered against my tower—and waited for the culprit to show themselves.

"I didn't have to wait long. Valora appeared to me, using everything at her disposal to provoke me into killing my rival and winning the Sorceress. She fell right into my trap, exposing herself to all of the angels. She fled to her tower, where we could not follow, and attempted to destroy the one who had started all of her madness."

_She takes 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' to new levels. _

Xavier snickered. "Quite. The weaker angel was no match for her might, but he couldn't, wouldn't let the tower fall with him, and so he sacrificed himself.

"The backlash of his death was felt throughout the realms, to all reaches of the universe as the aspects deemed the pinnacles unworthy and sealed themselves against them. All of the towers fell to madness. The scales were tipped so far that we could see the end coming. Freedom was within the aspects' grasp, but one by one they righted themselves, led by the weakened tower they fought to keep the angel's selfless deed from being in vain.

"Hyne appeared in the madness, the Council on her heels, but neither arrived before the process was complete. The towers had closed and the Guardians bound to them, so that Eternity's folly could never again be repeated."

"Wow..." She whistled. "So the towers run themselves again? I thought they wanted to be free?"

"Only one aspect still vies for his freedom. But we did not know this until Hyne meted out our punishments. Valora was first, and because they had once been friends, Hyne was lenient, banishing her from the High Plane, and sending her to the farthest reaches of the universe where she would wander for the rest of her immortal life."

He sighed. "As soon as the verdict was carried out, Destiny spoke: 'Valora, the fallen one, will rise again. Her link unbroken, her rule supreme, unless those whose very births are bound to the aspects can bring an end to her madness'."

"It was said that our children would be the ones to rectify our mistakes. To take on our failed responsibilities, and lead us back to the Creator's path. It was also discovered that Valora was still linked to her tower. Her aspect, in his eternal quest for freedom saw an opportunity and kept her bound to him, leaving his tower open, and his Guardians free. Because of this, Hyne was soft on our punishment, instead of sentencing us to exile or death, she chained us to the High Plane and forbid us from ever seeing our offspring."

_Obviously that didn't stick._

"No, it didn't. For a time all was well, but eventually minions loyal to Valora began to hunt for the Sorceresses and the babes. Valora had learned that one of the children was set to replace her, but without knowing which one, she simply sought to kill them all.

"The Sorceresses begged Hyne to interfere, pleaded for the lives of their children, but Hyne could do nothing. She was bound, as we all are, by the rules set forth by the Creator. Her task was no longer on the High Plane; the hunt for Eternity had to continue. Still, unable to ignore her daughters she sent them to the Council.

"The Council passed judgment, giving the Sorceresses the power needed to protect their children. On the longest night of the year they gathered, stood in a circle and spoke a ritual of binding. They poured all of their power, all of their gift into the spell, and in the end it consumed them, leaving nothing of them, not even the wraiths that should have been.

"In their sacrifice they had broken the curse upon all who carry the title."

"What curse?" she asked.

He shook his head. "That is something to be saved for another time. The magic holding you weakens; the time where you will awaken draws near.

"Valora has not been heard or seen since, but her presence is felt. Everywhere her aspect grows. Now we know some of what she's done. Possessing the young Sorceress is just the last in a long list of her activities. Still, we don't know what it means, what she could be planning. The only thing we are sure of is that she is targeting you."

"I kinda got that from the whole electrocution/coma scenario. What gave you the first clue?"

He laughed. "You should have been dead. The Council have their spindly fingers everywhere these days. I'm sure they knew from the start how the aspects would choose. They have given you a great boon, my dear. They have linked you to the tower that shall be yours, probably long ago judging by what your memory revealed. As long as the link is there, the tower will be forced to protect you."

"I thought the towers choose who their pinnacle is?"

He nodded. "The Guardians chooses who best suits their aspect, and in the end it may come down to their choice, but for now you have been given a 'back door' per se. If your life is threatened the tower will respond."

"And you said this happened before that memory..." she murmured. "I wondered why I wasn't dead."

"I am sorry about that, about your life with him. When it was obvious that Valora's presence hadn't faded with her binding the angels were assigned to watch over the children, but in keeping with Hyne's punishment, none were to watch their own. I was assigned to you and your brother."

"Wait, you were watching me all of that time! Why didn't you do something!"

"The rules. Like I've said before, we are but pawns in a very deadly game. We bend the rules but they must never be broken. Your uncle, the son of your grandfather's mistress, was next of kin. The aunt that you were supposed to live with passed away in childbirth not long after your mother died. Your father didn't exist according to humanity. Your uncle was the first option. I'm not sure why he chose you, or why he refused to take the boy. I believe his stated reason was something about a girl being less to feed. Either way, the human laws were on his side and I could not interfere. I was told that I would feel it if your life were in danger and not to lift a finger otherwise."

She grit her teeth against the sudden onslaught of hurt his admission caused.

His eyes narrowed. "If I could have, I would have torn him to shreds, but such is not the fate we were given. There was nothing I could do, and no way that you could have stopped him. I fought the Council over their edict but they would not be swayed. I'm sorry."

She nodded, blinking back tears, and changed the subject. "So, if this is all true, then what are the aspects and who are the other children? Tobias is kinda obvious, but the rest?"

He shook his head. "The first is a conversation to be had at a later date. As to the second; your brother knows of the others, he is already bringing them together. He will include you when you awaken."

It was hard to believe. Sturdy, logical, Tobias agreeing to do something he was told in a dream. _Her_, maybe, depending on how much she felt it was the truth. Tobias? _Never_.

"Yes, he was quite stubborn about it. He didn't accept it at all to begin with. I'm glad you're more open-minded."

She shook her head. "Don't go counting your chickens. I haven't decided yet. It all sounds too fantastical. I mean, me, a savior of all creation"—she laughed—"it's ridiculous. I can't even save myself. I have no power... maybe an uncanny survival rate, but no real ability. I'm not special at all."

"Your abilities will grow as your link with your aspect does. You are special, you already show a great aptitude for the magic adapted for humanity. Not many could replicate your attempt at merging two spells. Do not doubt yourself, if we have our way you shall be a savior."

He shut his eyes briefly, before they popped back open. "The spell is weakened. We have said all there is to be said here. Tobias will guide you in the next step. I will come to you again when the time is right. Think on what I have told you."

She opened her mouth to protest, to ask any of the million questions she still had, but like a puff of smoke he was gone.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

It always leads me back to suffering

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, June 27, __082 ALC,__ 12:00 Hours_

The sun shone brightly on the inhabitants of Balamb, inviting all to bask in its warm glow. Laughter echoed from the courtyards of Garden, the merry sound carrying across the flowerbeds in full bloom. Summer had finally arrived.

There were few people in Garden who weren't out enjoying the day. One of them sat, hunched behind his massive desk, brooding in the gloom of his darkened office.

He had things to do—the list seemed to be never-ending—but Squall wasn't ready to face the world just yet. The past two weeks had been nothing short of hell and the coming days promised to be worse as the nations decided what was to be done about 'The Sorceress Situation.'

After Rinoa's… no… the Sorceress' attack, he had been the only one standing, the only one they could look to for answers. Unfortunately, he had none.

In the span of a few hours his life had been torn out by the roots, turned upside down, and then shoved back into the hole where it had started.

He'd been shell-shocked. His only thoughts were of finding Rinoa, but his panicked pursuit had been interrupted by the Disciplinary Committee. After their interrogation, he'd been confined to his quarters. It was standard procedure for a person of his rank involved in a crime of that nature, but it had infuriated him. He should have been out looking for her and instead they had shut him in his room to stew.

To wonder. To think that maybe if he had just done things differently, had just listened, none of it would have happened.

That morning Rinoa had come to him, had sought him out even after the way he had treated her the night before. He'd been so happy to see her, so willing to try and make things right between them, but somehow things had gotten out of hand. He'd tried to explain it to her then, to tell her of his family but she dismissed his explanations without even truly listening. She had screamed at him, and eventually he lost his temper and threw her out. It was perhaps what he regretted the most. If he could have just made her see reason…

Her last words as she left repeated over and over in his mind, mocking him with their cruelty. _"Don't you love me?"_

The answer was yes, would always be yes, but the words were lost to her as she ran from him in tears. If he'd gone after her, spoken so that she could have heard him, would it have still have turned out the same?

He couldn't be sure, and it tore him apart.

After four days of his 'voluntary' confinement, Cid came to collect Squall's official statement. Edea was with him, and Squall had been thankful for her silent support as he worked to form coherent sentences. The whole story came pouring out, from the SeeD ball up to the attack.

Edea had been livid. Squall could still hear her words. _"She was acting out of the ordinary and you didn't even think to tell someone? A _Sorceress_ with unimaginable power and you didn't once think to seek me out? I've never doubted your ability until this moment. What could have possessed you to ignore something so dangerous?" _He hadn't had an answer. He didn't know. At first he'd passed Rinoa's strangeness off to her recovery from time compression. They'd all had to sort themselves out after that, and then he'd excused it as her adjusting to life at Garden. He'd been so busy, so wrapped up in his own dilemmas he hadn't taken the time to notice the continuation of her strange behavior. He had told Edea as much.

She had given him the most heart-sinking look of disappointment before grilling him. _"Think_,_ Squall_,_"_ she'd said, her unnerving amber eyes locked onto his, as if she could see the answers forming in his mind, _"was there anything else, anything at all out of the ordinary that took place before, during, or after the attack?_"

He hadn't had to think that hard. There was plenty that was strange about the attack, the most prominent of which was: How the hell had she pulled that much power with the Odine Bangle still encircling her wrist?

Cid had spoken, his words cutting deeper than any blade ever could. _"We assumed you had removed it for her." _He apologized immediately after but the damage was done.

Squall had ignored the insult—and the fresh hurt—to tell Edea of Rinoa's voice; how it had changed and how she'd displayed powers he knew she hadn't had before. Edea had concluded that they had been wrong about everything, that Rinoa was most likely possessed, but by who, she couldn't say. There weren't any other Sorceresses; Rinoa was truly the last of her kind.

After the meeting, Squall had been infuriated with himself. Why hadn't he cared enough to notice what she was going through? She'd probably been screaming for help and he'd been off, buried in paperwork.

He was such a fool.

His isolation had been lifted and his position had been restored. He'd buried himself under a mountain of work, barely even bothering to come up for air, let alone sleep or food.

Everyone wanted to know what was being done to rectify 'The Sorceress Situation.' Day after day he sat poring over reports and Sorceress sightings trying desperately to find some clue as to where Rinoa had gone.

Reporters hounded him, wanting exclusives on the story behind the attack and Xu was only able to do so much to keep them at bay. The Garden's orders had been that _"no comment"_ was to be their only comment, but still the reporters came back, picking up rumors and tips from those who had no real idea of what had happened.

Because of the media frenzy, Squall had been 'encouraged' to avoid the infirmary, so as not to add to any of the rumors. But Quistis' absence was getting harder and harder to ignore. He worried for her. She had been in bad shape when the medics had carried her away, and that she hadn't returned to duty... well, Squall wasn't sure what to think. She had been a constant in his life for so long that now he didn't quite know what to do without her. She would have been the one to nag him into eating, or force him into stopping for rest.

Zell was suspiciously absent as well. He had been injured, but Squall had been sure it was only a fractured leg. Something like that wouldn't take long to heal with magic. While the blonde was often loud and rambunctious, he generally provided an unmatched distraction and Squall could use the serious side of Zell that was often overlooked.

He missed his friends. Something that before Rinoa he would have never admitted, even to himself. It was just one more proof of her astounding effect on him. He had to get her back. He needed her; he didn't know how he could do this without her.

Ten days post-attack, the newest bulletin had hit him like a ton of bricks.

The nations were calling for blood.

A plan of action was still up for debate, but Squall knew sooner or later he'd be called on as Commander to lead SeeD in the hunt for the Sorceress. Cid had visited that day, supposedly to see how his Commander was faring, but Squall knew it was to ask the question on everyone's mind: Could he, if ordered, kill the Sorceress, kill Rinoa?

His head said yes, his heart screamed no, and Squall's soul was left curled up and crying somewhere in between.

Whatever Cid had seen had satisfied him, and he had left, question unasked.

Squall had been relieved, as even he didn't know what his answer would have been. He couldn't just forget or turn off what Rinoa had become to him. Before her drastic personality overhaul she had been sweet and vulnerable, with just enough of a backbone to provide him with a wake-up call. But he also couldn't ignore the threat that she had become or the fact that she would never forgive herself, or him if he were to let her do something terrible.

The next day the headlines shifted. A student claimed that she overheard the fight, that it began with an accusation that Nichole had tried to steal him away from Rinoa. It was ludicrous but that didn't stop the gossipmongers from eating it up. He wondered if the world thought of Balamb Garden as some podunk backwater, with how readily they believed that he would sleep with his cousin.

Still, he couldn't complain much—the story and its popularity had unexpectedly worked in their favor. Crazy possessed Sorceress seemed much more frightening than spurned lover who happened to be a Sorceress. Rinoa even had some sympathizers out there, judging by the hate mail he'd received. It would have been comical if Rinoa had been there to share it with.

A sharp knock sounded on his door, breaking him from his gloomy thoughts and tossing him back to the present. It had been three days since the news broke and no one but reporters knocked on his door anymore. His SeeDs knew to report to Xu and she always rang ahead.

"Can't you read?" he shouted. "No interviews until a statement has gone out from the Committee."

A muffled voice answered, "Not a reporter."

Squall sighed. If this was some trick, he'd hurl whoever it was out of his window—Committee be damned. He hit the release, watching warily as the man stepped into his office. Dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, he didn't look all that much like one of the slick reporters that vied for his time.

"That's a nice way to greet people…" The man smiled, showing his teeth. "Or is that a privilege being in charge buys you? I'm still not quite sure how the skinny silent kid grows up to be the skinny grumpy SeeD leader while I'm stuck being a messenger boy, but hey, life sucks, right?"

Squall was taken aback, but before he could say anything the man continued. "Oh yeah…" he said, throwing a perfect SeeD salute. "At your service, Commander."

Squall was a breath away from either expelling the man or strangling him—he couldn't decide which—when an inkling of recognition shot through him from the golden brown hair to the uniquely colored eyes and the 'world owes me' attitude. The voice was a bit smoother and deeper with age, but there was no doubt: this was Adrian, the bully who'd run around with Squall's nemesis Seifer, and had lived to make Nichole's—and subsequently his—life a living nightmare.

Adrian had always had an authority issue; it was a wonder how he'd made it all the way to SeeD. Then again, Seifer's attitude was just as bad and he'd made it. "What do you want, Adrian? I'm in no mood for your shit."

Adrian did a double-take. "My Hyne, he speaks… and more to the point, you recognized me. I'm flattered."

"Don't be," Squall bit out, "I wouldn't have if Nichole hadn't shown up. I'd state my business fast if I were you, a past acquaintance will only get you so far before I demote you for your abysmal lack of respect."

Adrian just grinned, ignoring the threat. "Wow, you really are grumpy. Well, I guess that can be excused, I'd be a little cranky myself if the rumors were that I was screwing my cousin."

Squall growled, "If you've come to reiterate gossip, I've no need to hear it. Get out."

"No, I'm not here for gossip, but information I have in spades. Apparently I'm the best of those 'in the know' to enlighten you on the situation. Gavin was… well, I would say nervous, but I've never seen him display that particular emotion before. Either way, he didn't want to intrude, being a familial stranger and all, and Anne wasn't sure you'd remember her. Tobias won't leave Nichole's side—in perhaps the first display of loyalty I've seen from him—and Quistis is still on bed rest, so that leaves little ol' me to deliver the news."

Squall clenched his fists in a desperate attempt to calm the fury rising up within him. The chance for news was just too good to pass up. The Committee were doing their best to keep him out of the loop until they decided what to do, so he hadn't heard anything on the others in days, and what information he had was sketchy at best. "Go on," he prompted. "What news?"

"Starting with the attack," Adrian said. "Everyone except Nichole has made a successful recovery, which means that unless she dies, the charge against your Sorceress stands at assault, which shouldn't carry the death sentence." His eyes, for once, were serious. "Quistis informed us about the procedure for this type of an inquiry, so we felt it was important for you to know that. I have reports on the others as well but I can leave if you'd rather not hear them."

Squall shook his head, somewhat appeased by the news. "No, stay. Thank you for informing me about the Sorceress."

Adrian's eyes narrowed. "Man, there are rumors that you were screwing her, everyone says you love her, and you call her 'the Sorceress'? Can't you say or her name? Or is it against Garden policy?"

Squall saw red. That was it, the last straw. This asshole was not only getting demoted, he was going to be removed from Garden, forcefully if necessary, and with pleasure. "Her name is Rinoa," he ground out, "and at the point at which I have to consider killing her, yes, I have to refer to her as 'the Sorceress'. Now…"

"I'm sorry…" Adrian interrupted. "I didn't mean anything by it, it was just strange to her you refer to the girl like that. That's harsh, though… to have to think about…" He trailed off, allowing Squall the time to pull together the last shreds of patience to hear him out.

"Hopefully, it won't come to that. We have some reassurance that Nichole will wake up… it's just a matter of time." He sighed. "Your Sorceress is possessed, but this isn't quite your run-of-the-mill Sorceress from the future mumbo jumbo that you've dealt with. I can't really tell you how I know, just that the thing possessing her is an angel."

"An angel?" Squall asked incredulously. "I'm supposed to believe that angels exist?"

Adrian nodded. "Believe me, I know it sounds loopy, but apparently there are many mysteries man hasn't solved about the powers that be. Angels are just part of it. There's a power struggle going on right under our noses, and we all have a part to play."

Squall wasn't sure how much he was ready to believe, but from what he'd seen during the course of the Sorceress War he wasn't going to dismiss anything out of hand. "How much does this struggle involve me, and where does Rinoa fit in?"

"You aren't really involved as far as I know, except that you are tied to Sorceress Rinoa. Nichole seems to be the main target of Valora, but we don't know much more than that. I am supposed to tell you that Valora is very insidious and she likes mind-games, so nothing you could have done would have subverted the hold she has on Rinoa. So, if you're blaming yourself, don't."

"So if Rinoa is a pawn, what does an angel want with Nichole? She has no power that I know of. What could be so special about her to call for that level of hostility?"

Adrian shook his head. "We have a theory, but nothing concrete. It seems that Nichole was born with something Valora wants, and now that she's found her, she'll do anything to kill her. As silly as it sounds, we can't allow her to die, or we're talking destruction on a universal level."

Squall scoffed. Yeah right… his little cousin, the quiet little mouse with a hellcat temper, important enough to affect the universe…? It didn't make any sense. Although, he hadn't thought he'd be the one to save the world… so maybe it was possible, but still… seriously?

"This brings us to one of the reasons I'm here. Nichole is in a weakened state, kept alive mostly by the machines she's hooked up to and the doctors are convinced that she's brain dead. They're fighting to pull the plug. Even as limited as your powers are right now, you haven't been banned from seeing her. We're hoping that as kin and an official of Garden, your word will hold more sway."

It was a valid thought. Tobias and Gavin would have little power over such a decision. Unless they'd somehow made a fortune in their ten years at Trabia, their lack of rank and the funds to go with it would keep their arguments for life-support falling on deaf ears. Even in Garden, such things were expensive… well beyond what a beginning SeeD could afford, and Garden was not a place for the sick. If it wasn't curable, you were out of luck.

Adrian took his silence to be a dismissal. "I know you may not be in the best mindset to help someone you haven't had a connection with in a decade, and Tobias warned me that you didn't part on the best of terms, but I had to try. Please consider it… I… never mind."

It was somewhat gratifying to see Adrian reduced to asking for his help. Of course he would have done it anyway. Past hurts mattered little when it was life and death and the ties that bound them as family were not so easily broken. "I'll do what I can."

Adrian nodded thankfully. "Then the best thing you can do for her right now is to see her. It may start some of the rumor mills again, but we should be able to keep the chatter mouths at bay. They've practically shut down the infirmary, so once we're inside there will be less exposure. I have orders to escort you there if you decide to come."

"Fine," Squall said, ignoring the man as he stepped out into the fresher air of the corridor.

The main hall was mostly vacant due to the summer break and the trip to the infirmary was short and uninterrupted. A Disciplinary Committee member guarded the entrance but let them pass with a short nod. Squall quickly scanned the reception area for Dr. Kadowaki, not really expecting to see her. She rarely manned the front desk anymore, preferring the quiet of her newly remodeled office. Often, like now, a trainee in light green robes sat at her old desk, greeting the arrivals and performing simple triage if necessary.

He was just about to address the girl when the Doctor stepped out of a room. "Ah, Dr. Kadowaki, do you have a moment?"

The Doctor turned to him, smiling. "As the Commander of Garden, or as Squall, dear?"

Squall's lips twitched up, the closest he'd gotten to a smile in weeks. He'd always liked Dr. Kadowaki; she was everybody's no-nonsense mother. "As whomever it takes to get the job done."

"I thought as much. Just follow me; my office will be more private."

Adrian followed behind them as they entered the small space, and Squall was tempted to say something, wondering why the Doctor hadn't protested.

"Judging by the fact that Healer Sprite is present, I can only guess that this has something to do with the Skye girl."

Healer… well, that was surprising. Only those ranked Class A commandeered the title Healer. The rank rivaled the doctor's and would in some cases even surpass it. Squall wondered why he was needed; if a Healer had said that Nichole would pull through his word should be law.

Dr. Kadowaki continued, "As I've told him before, the decision to pull her from life support is not up to me. Cid requested the help of doctors from Esthar and in doing so placed them in charge of her care. I've tried to get them to accept Healer Sprite as a resource, but since they've declined his help, neither he nor I can pull rank without causing political upheaval.

"I'd be happy to help if I could find a reason, but her kin aren't making very good arguments to keep her on life support and don't have the funds to back up their request. There's been some talk of the girl being brain dead, and although I think the reports are fabricated, I can't do anything without proof."

"Fabricated?" Squall asked. Just what was going on here? Adrian had dragged him into something much more complicated than just a simple life support action.

"Yes, I've been suspicious of those fancy doctors from the start. They claim to be sent from Esthar, but I don't recognize any of them and I know a good deal of Laguna's doctors from medical school. One of them has a pretty distinct Galbadian accent and last I heard there wasn't a Galbadian to be had in all of Esthar. Then there's the fact that none of them are Healers, even though that was what we specifically requested. Healer Sprite was spread rather thinly between Zell's broken leg and Quistis' blindness, so we had hoped to bring in another expert for the girl."

It was still hard to associate Adrian with the title Healer. He was such a bully Squall would have had an easier time accepting ax murderer.

"As if that wasn't enough, when they put the limitations on visiting rights, they included all healing personnel…" Kadowaki continued. "They claimed, of course, that gossip was just as likely amongst the staff and the less disruptions the better. I worked to overrule that decision, but I feel it's above my rank to just outright abolish it. I don't want to get Cid involved on a hunch. The poor man's got enough on his plate; if he doesn't slow down some, his heart is going to force him to. He's not as young as he used to be."

That was true. Even Squall had noticed that the lines of fatigue had deepened on his face recently. He felt somewhat guilty that he'd been off in his own world, sulking, while Cid fought his battles for him. Not anymore. Whatever was going on, he would get to the bottom of it.

Kadowaki shook her head. "I went to the Committee, but they are useless in the matter. Half of them would rather see the girl die so that they can charge the Sorceress with murder and begin the witch hunt. Hyne… and that poor girl. She's seen so much trauma in her life, I shudder to think of it."

"What happened to her?" Squall wondered aloud. The statement he'd received had said extensive nerve damage, but from what Kadowaki implied, there must have been more to it.

"The next of kin opened the records so there should be no harm in telling you. She presented with nerve damage that eventually caused her to lapse into a coma. What we found once we started triage was something else entirely. At first we were sure that all of the injuries happened in the one attack, but then one of the trainees noticed something odd about the tissue surrounding the wounds. It was fibrous tissue—scar tissue, which is innately weaker than unblemished skin.

"There were so many of them that her back and legs were unrecognizable lumps of flesh; it was only after that we realized that the scar tissue continued up into her uterus. From the state of her injuries I'd say that she was beaten savagely and sexually assaulted, perhaps more than once and most likely before hitting puberty. We now think that whatever charge was run through her body during the attack was enough to reopen the old wounds."

It wasn't possible… he wanted to scream it, but the words felt like sand on his tongue as the Doctor prattled on, heedless to his plight. "We managed stop the bleeding and repair most of the damage but we can't heal what isn't there any longer."

His brain refused to equate the little girl he'd 'protected' from harm with the very real, very vulgar image Kadowaki was describing. He felt like he was going to be sick…

Kadowaki sighed. "Her death should be more than a sideshow in some political pissing match. No one deserves that. The doctors are either quacks—or fixing the records—and I'm almost positive President Laguna wouldn't employ such men."

Squall mulled over the information that he could handle, shoving the rest into a small corner of his mind that screamed DO NOT TOUCH… EVER! He didn't need to know anything about Nichole to know that this business with the doctors was trouble, and if Galbadia turned out to be involved like his gut was telling him… well, that opened up a whole new can of Abyss Worms.

Galbadia had been the most prominent thorn in Garden's side over Rinoa, and since the attack, they'd upped their political pressure ten-fold, even going so far as to issue ultimatums. Most of the statements were politicians blowing hot-air; as far as Squall knew, they were in no shape to fight another war, not after the losses they'd sustained to their ranks during Ultimecia's Campaign. But politically they retained a lot of support. They had come out of the war smelling of roses, claiming that they had been duped by the big bad Sorceress just as the rest of the world had.

They could thank their new President, Baron Hart, for that little piece of genius. It had seemed like a small matter at the time. Edea had been on trial for her crimes against humanity, and after the World Summit had ruled in her favor, they couldn't very well persecute the minions under her command.

Now it was coming back to bite them, as President Hart pulled in more support from the masses by running the country as a democracy. He had effectively ended the resistance in Timber, as all the citizens really were after was a say in their own system and a reduced military presence in their towns. President Hart had given them both, and for the first time in twenty years, Galbadia was ruled as one nation.

Of course, anyone that bothered to look closely enough knew it was still a dictatorship, but most were willing to turn a blind eye due to either greed or fear. Squall had absolutely no problem believing that Galbadia would do something like order a girl's murder so that they could go after the Sorceress legally, but he would need proof. Thankfully he had the resources to find it.

He shuddered at the thought of what he was about to do, but he would do anything to save Rinoa from the death sentence, and if he could help Nichole in the process, it was just that much more important.

Still, he hadn't ever wanted to think of the number again, let alone dial it. It almost made him regret that his travels had paved the way for international communication. "Can I use your phone, Doctor?" he asked. She nodded, and he dialed the number before he could think twice about it.

A dark, smooth voice answered on the third ring. "President Loire's office… the President is busy at the moment, may I take a message?"

Mentally, Squall sighed in relief. Maybe he wouldn't have to do it after all. "Yes, could you tell him that Squall Leonhart called and would like to—"

"Squall? Well, why didn't you just say so? Here he is…"

Squall cursed, and a moment later the tentative voice of Laguna Loire, president of Esthar, and personal pain in Squall's ass, came over the line. "Um, hello. This is Laguna."

"President Loire, thank you for taking my call. I have a question for you." Years of ingrained political training had him saying all the right words even as he cringed.

"Shoot."

He ignored the very crude response. It was just so… Laguna. Squall would have thought that somewhere between all of his journalistic travels and his political accomplishments he would've have gained some polish, but nope, not Laguna. "Is it true that you were contacted about the Sorceress attack and sent your personal doctors to assist with the wounded?"

"Sure was, Cid contacted me himself. He asked for Healers, though, and that's what I sent—we've got two of the best in the world here and they left right away. They came back two days later with a message that their services were no longer needed. I found it sorta strange, but they were talking about this Healer that was already there so I figured you must have gotten everything sorted out on your own. I tried getting a hold of Cid but he's a hard man to pin down."

It confirmed his suspicions, but he was reluctant to get Laguna further involved. One: it was Laguna, and it was just best not to go there. Two: Cid still preferred to run Garden as he always had, an entity separate from the nations. Everything was on a need to know basis.

"I think there was a mix up in the orders and we meant no insult to your Healers, or yourself. If there are any hard feelings I'm certain that we can find a way to compensate everyone."

"No. No, don't worry about it. We're not so easily insulted."

"Thank you, President Loire," he said, hoping to end the conversation there; Laguna had given him all that he needed.

"Oh, and Squall…" Laguna trailed off.

"Yes?" Squall answered, trying to keep his frustration out of his tone.

"Well… I guess I just want to say I'm sorry about Rinoa. I hope you both come out of this all right."

Unnerved and yet a little touched by his thoughtfulness, Squall thanked him again before hanging up. That was one mystery solved. He dialed Cid's personal line and wasn't surprised when Edea picked up on the second ring.

"Headmaster Cid's office, how may I help you?" Squall had almost hoped it was going to be her to pick up. While the Headmaster had power, he also had so much on his plate that small details sometimes escaped him. Edea had no such limitations and her mind was like a steel trap when it came to information.

"Matron? This is Squall, I just had a couple quick questions for you."

"I'll try to answer them, dear."

"Do you know anything about the Healer situation in the infirmary?"

"Sure. Laguna offered his personal Healers when we called him about the attack. Cid accepted his help personally. Are they not performing adequately?"

"According to President Loire, they were sent home with the message that we didn't need them any longer. Dr. Kadowaki has informed me that there are some doctors here claiming to be from Esthar, but now it's pretty clear that wherever they are from, they are imposters."

"Oh, dear, this news is most disconcerting. Just a moment, let me get Cid."

He waited only a moment before Cid came on the line. "Squall… what's this I hear about the Healers from Esthar being turned away?"

"It's true, but the strange thing is, there are still doctors here claiming to be from Esthar. They've taken over control of Nichole Skye's case."

"I sent the Estharian Healers down there myself with express orders that Dr. Kadowaki was in charge. I don't like this. I don't like it at all… I'll be right down to straighten things out myself."

"Thank you, sir," Squall said before the phone cut out. He was relieved; one way or another, the Headmaster would get to the bottom of this.

He turned to the doctor. "Apparently your hunch was right: whoever they are, they aren't from Esthar and the ones that were had orders that you were in charge. You were right to be suspicious."

"That's not what's important right now," Adrian interjected. "Right now the only thing that matters is that whatever the reason, these imposters want to kill Nichole. You should be in there with her. They kick out Tobias and Gavin every time they go in to 'treat' her, but I'd like to see them try that stunt with you."

Squall nodded. "Fine. Thank you for your time and the use of your phone, Doctor. I expect the Headmaster will be here shortly and he'll help you get your infirmary back in order."

"It was my pleasure," she responded.

Squall stepped into the infirmary proper, heading unerringly for the small ICU. He wasn't sure what he could do for Nichole at this point; after all, Cid would set everything to rights soon, but found that he was still somewhat eager to see her.

He'd avoided thinking on his feelings about his cousins' sudden reappearance in his life. Rinoa was always at the forefront of his mind, but now that he was about to come face to face with them again, he couldn't help but take those feelings out and examine them.

With Tobias there was a great deal of anger, stemming mainly from the years before the GFs when he'd believed he'd been betrayed. He felt only a vague curiosity for this Gavin he'd heard so much about… they were easy.

Nichole was much more complicated. There was anger, yes… she'd wormed her way into his heart after Ellone had left him, refusing to let him be alone… to depend on no one. Then when he was at his most vulnerable she'd left him, just as Ellone had, but the hurt had cut so much deeper. Deep enough that even with the memory loss caused by the GF he had never trusted anyone until he'd met Rinoa...

He'd felt betrayed, just as he felt now with Rinoa. Even though deep down he knew it wasn't either of their faults, it didn't stop the feeling, or the hurt. Sometimes he wondered if he was fated to be left behind, to always be the one left crying in the rain after being abandoned by those he loved.

The more he thought, the more he was convinced that he had been right to begin with. It was so much better to only depend on yourself. You suffered a lot less heartache that way.

The problem was, he couldn't seem to stop.

He was standing outside the ICU, had tolerated the insults of a pompous prick, had dialed a number he'd sworn he'd never touch, all because of the woman he loved and the little girl that had loved him. Part of it he could blame on duty. His duty to his Garden and his duty to his family, but even duty couldn't cover all of it. He almost wished it could. Duty he understood, duty he could do… it was caring that he didn't know what to do with.

His thoughts came to a grinding halt as a sallow looking man stepped into his path. "I'm sorry, sir, this room if off limits to visitors, you'll have to leave now." Sniveling, he gestured to the door.

"I'm not a visitor. I command this Garden. I didn't quite seem to catch your name, Doctor…?" The man was taken aback and Squall wasn't pleased by the fear that entered his eyes.

"My name is Dr. Driton; I'm the head doctor assigned to this case."

Trying to diffuse the situation, Squall smiled with fake enthusiasm—thanking the extra acting classes he'd been forced into with all his heart. "Then you must be the doctor assigned to my cousin! Thank you for taking such good care of her. If you don't mind, I'd like to see her now."

Squall sidestepped the floundering man with ease and slipped through the door. The kill 'em with kindness routine always tended to do that to overblown idiots. The door slid into place behind him, effectively cutting off the man's retort.

Nichole lay on the bed, her skin fading into the white sheets. Her hair seemed all the more red against the backdrop, eerily paralleling spilt blood. She looked peaceful, almost as if she were sleeping and if it weren't for the tubes jutting out of her every which way, he could almost pretend that she was. Two chairs were mashed into the small space beside the bed, each containing a weary looking man.

Tobias burst out laughing the moment the door slid shut. "Man, the look on that pompous prick's face was priceless!"

The other man, who he assumed could only be Gavin, was more subdued. "Yes, he's been quite the troublemaker."

Squall took a moment to examine him, seeing now why Nichole had said that Gavin reminded her of him. It was a bit like looking into a fun-house mirror. The features were a little different, a little in the slant of the eyes, a little more in the shape of the jaw, and the blue of the eyes was much darker, as was the brown of the hair, but the resemblance was a bit unnerving.

Suddenly recognition sparked; this was the SeeD that had been dancing with Selphie.

Squall acknowledged him. "So you must be Gavin."

Gavin snorted. "Yeah. I don't know what she's smoking though, we look nothing alike. I'm much more handsome."

Squall smirked. "Really? That's funny, she told me—and I quote—'he's not that attractive.'"

Gavin laughed.

"Well, aren't you two all buddy-buddy. I told Nichole you'd get along famously," Tobias butted in.

"Jealous?" Gavin asked, his tone so flat, Squall couldn't tell if it was meant sarcastically or not.

"Yeah, right," Tobias supplied, "I'm just happy everything is working out. By the way, Squall, I wanted to reiterate how apologetic I am that things turned out the way they did. I—"

"Oh, Hyne, here we go again…" Gavin interjected. "He's sorry, okay?"

Squall shrugged. "Whatever."

"See, Tobias, he's fine and now we don't have to listen to your day-long apology."

Squall hid a smile at Tobias' offended look. He decided he could like Gavin; someone else who agreed that Tobias was long-winded at best would always be okay in his book.

"There is just one question I had," Squall asked on a whim. "I know why you wouldn't contact me, but what stopped Nichole?"

Tobias sheepishly answered, "By the time the mandatory adjustment period was up, I'd forgotten about telling her where you'd been sent. She'd broken down entirely when she realized that we weren't going with you. She withdrew from reality for a while and anyone that tried to talk to her only received the nastiest of replies. By the time I'd thought about it again, she was already neck deep in a pile of enemies she'd made for herself, and I figured she didn't need any more stress.

"It wasn't until she'd met Gavin years later that I thought of it again. I did some research and found out that you'd been accepted into the SeeD program. I figured you had a life of your own at that point, and to reintroduce her into it would only hurt her in the end. You'd never be the best friend she remembered. Gavin filled the hole somewhat, at least more than I ever could. I guess I'll never understand her as well as you guys do."

No, even when Tobias had access to what Squall referred to as the "cheaters" method, he was never as in tune to his sister's feelings as Squall was. It was kind of sad in a way, but not the big deal that Tobias made it out to be.

The thing was, there was no secret to 'understanding' Nichole. She just _was_. Her moods changed in the blink of an eye, her passions ran in so many directions you couldn't ever keep them straight—and for that matter, neither could she. No, the 'secret' was to just go with the flow, to expect the unexpected and get lost in her whirlwind of life.

And it was for that reason that Tobias would never be able to figure out his sister. She would never fit into one of those tidy little boxes he liked to file things in.

Gavin smiled at him knowingly and Squall found himself returning the gesture. Tobias would forever be out of the loop.

"So what is going on in the world outside these four walls?" Tobias inquired.

"The Sorceress is still at large and we've discovered that the doctors caring for Nichole are fakes."

"I knew something was fishy about that guy!" Gavin exclaimed.

"How have things been in here?" Squall asked. "Has there been any change at all?"

Tobias and Gavin both shook their heads. "None."

"Are there any preparations if she doesn't wake up?" he asked, not liking the question but needing to know all the same.

"Oh, ye of little faith…"

All three of their heads whipped around to the figure on the bed, as she coughed, pulling out the long breathing tube.

Gavin was the first to move, grabbing a cup of water and handing it to her. She sat up and drank a good bit before handing it back to him with a beaming smile. "So… what did I miss?" she asked, reaching out for Gavin even as she kept her eyes on Squall.

Tobias turned his back to them, in gesture that Squall remembered from his childhood—one that meant he was holding back tears—as Gavin leaned into her embrace, wrapping her in his arms.

Squall sighed. "Nothing much, just a few weeks of political bullshit. You have once again proved that you are a trouble magnet. I may have missed you, but I can't say I've missed that particular bit."

She stuck her tongue out at him as Gavin pulled away and Tobias recovered, stepping up to the spot Gavin had abandoned. "How are you holding up?"

Nichole smiled. "I'm fine… never felt better. I'm sorry I worried you."

Tobias nodded, bending down to give her a brief hug before moving back to his preferred spot.

"Don't I get a hug from you too?" she asked Squall. "I mean, come on… I was on my death bed here…"

He smirked at her attempt at humor before obliging; there was little harm in a hug. He squeezed her gently, wary of all of the things still hooked into her.

She sighed contentedly against his shoulder. "Thanks, sometimes it just helps to know what's real."

He wasn't quite sure what she was talking about but nodded anyway as she pulled away and asked, "So fill me in here, who is the Sorceress to you?"

Squall shook his head, not wanting to get into the details of Rinoa just yet. "I'll let these two fill you in. I think they know most of it. I need to see the Headmaster and the Doctor to update your status."

"Okay," she agreed, "but you should come back later if you have time. We have a lot to catch up on."

He nodded as he left, heading back to Kadowaki's office.

Knocking once, he entered as he was bid to find the Headmaster sitting and chatting amicably with the Doctor. "Squall, we were just discussing your cousin's situation," she said, gesturing him to the unoccupied chair.

"Nichole has regained consciousness and seems to be fully recovered, although I'd rather let you make that call," Squall informed her.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, rising from her chair. "Good, I'll head in straight away. I'll talk to you later, Cid, thanks for the update." She bustled off without waiting for a response.

Cid turned to him as the door slid shut behind her. "Thank you, Squall, for looking into this matter. I fear I've been wrapped in so much red-tape lately I haven't been able to see what's going on under my nose. Unfortunately, the imposters escaped before they could be detained. We're going through their belongings now, but it's my impression that they were mercenaries, hired by someone else to carry out an assassination.

"We're looking into it but it will take some time. I have a few missions for you to organize, the details of which can be found on your computer. I want to be the first to tell you that the World Summit and the Committee have come to a decision in regard to the Sorceress.

"It has been decided that SeeD will be responsible for 'cleaning up the mess of their doing.' A team of six will be chosen to find and retrieve the Sorceress by any means necessary. The President of Galbadia has come forward; he believes that he knows where she is hiding. He has demanded to brief the team personally, and while I'm not happy about it, I can't find grounds to deny him. The choices for the team is up to you, but it has been determined that the Skye girl—if able—will accompany you."

"No," Squall said, his response automatic.

"This is an order, Squall. It's not one I'm happy giving, but I can't and won't change it. This girl was the catalyst behind the original attack, and now with this new attempt, we can't ignore her or her possible significance to the entity controlling the Sorceress."

Squall glared. "So you would use her as bait?"

"It is unlikely that the attempts will stop; she will be in no more danger there with five capable SeeDs than she would here. Don't make me into the villain here, my boy. I'm doing the best I can with what I have to work with."

"Whatever." Squall sighed. "She'll need time to recover."

Cid nodded. "The mission will be scheduled for a week out. The longer we delay, the more we risk the Sorceress moving or attacking. I expect the mission specs for both operations on my desk first thing in the morning. You are dismissed."

Squall sighed, reluctantly saluting before leaving the small room. The order to find the Sorceress was not unexpected, but he'd never thought that they'd stoop to using Nichole as a lure. It was a despicable move, one that would have tasted sour even had he not been related to her. He mentally went through the short list of SeeDs still active during the summer break. There were so few that he knew and less that he'd trust in a fight.

Arriving at his desk, he flipped on his computer panel and went through the security processes to log in to the mission specs. The first was interesting: a classified mission to gather information from the heart of the Galbadian Cabinet, looking for a link between Galbadia and the imposters. Cid apparently didn't trust the new Galbadian President's intentions. Even with the small pool to pull from, Squall was a little surprised when Gavin Mortis, Adrian Sprite and Anne Sprite were the most qualified and least recognizable SeeDs he had to work with. He would have preferred to send his go-to team, but Quistis and Zell were well known now, effectively removing them from any operations requiring anonymity.

The Sorceress Retrieval Team was easier; Quistis and Zell were obvious choices, and with Nichole going, Tobias would probably be a good choice. The last position—after a long internal debate—went to Seifer. For once, Seifer's past connection to Rinoa would work in Squall's favor. He would be just as invested in getting her back in one piece.

It was later than he expected when he finished his last report, but he knew his thoughts weren't going to give him peace. The past week circled like vultures in his mind, but exhaustion kept him from focusing on any one thing. He trudged on, determined to at least finish his paperwork. Before he knew it he had nodded off, his chin propped on the papers ready to file.

His dreams were of a flower field, his angel, and her million watt smile.


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning**: Mature themes ahead.

**Chapter Nine**

But I will soar until the wind whips me down

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, July 4, 082 ALC, 16:00 Hours_

Nichole huffed, shifting along the bed while her pillow let out a short growl at the disturbance. She glared up into the bright gray eyes of the only friend who hadn't abandoned her.

"Oh, knock it off," she told him. "I'm bored, and I'm getting a crick in my neck. You wanted to be on the bed, deal with it."

She shook her head as she realized she was arguing with an animal, that while incredibly intelligent, likely didn't understand a thing she said. She took comfort in the fact that she hadn't yet stooped to the insanity of expecting a response.

She couldn't be far from it now, though. She was so bored it was excruciating. The tedium of bed rest was all encompassing. The walls of the room were bare; what reading material had been left for her had been gone over twice; and she could only pet the cat so much before she got bored, or he got irritated. There was nothing to do at all besides think, and that was the one thing she was trying to avoid with all of her might.

Some thoughts were okay—were safe—but once her mind took off it always invariably circled around to her situation and then inevitably to things she'd rather pretend didn't exist.

It was all Squall's fault.

He'd been the one to agree with the doctor that she be kept on bed rest and then pulled Anne and Gavin away to prep for some silly mission when she needed their company. Tobias had abandoned her, Quistis was busy, and Adrian—her last ditch at entertainment—was with Anne and Gavin. She wanted to tear her hair out but was thinking it'd be more satisfying to start with Squall's.

At least she had Griever… Which she had to admit was entirely through Squall's benevolence; she'd heard he was the one to convince the Infirmary head to allow the creature. Still, the cat wasn't enough to make up for the five days of mind-numbing torture she'd endured because of the broody Commander's orders that she rest.

She pulled her legs up in an effort to get more comfortable, glaring at the cat, daring him to respond. He closed his eyes and turned his head away in a gesture that made it clear she wasn't worth his effort. Torn between huffing and laughing, she shook her head.

She imagined insanity would be a lot less boring.

The door slid open and the matronly doctor bustled in. "Good afternoon," Dr. Kadowaki greeted. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," Nichole replied. "I've been fine for days now, when do I get to move back to my own room?"

"Probably not for a while, dear. You've been cleared for duty and are being requested for a mission leaving in less than an hour."

"Really?" Nichole beamed as Kadowaki nodded. "Oh, thank Hyne!"

The doctor laughed. "Well, it's good to see that you're up for it. I'm to tell you to report to the Parking Lot immediately. You'll be briefed further there."

"Thanks," Nichole said, and then added, "and thanks for your care and support these past few weeks. I really do appreciate it."

Dr. Kadowaki smiled. "You're welcome, dear," she said before leaving.

Nichole jumped up, heading straight for the small wardrobe and the waiting SeeD uniform. After a short debate over the leggings she found with it she decided that it would be strange to go without them, despite no longer having scars to cover up, and pulled them on too.

"Come on, Griever, I've got a mission and you need to let the doctor have her room back," Nichole informed him as she gathered up her belongings and headed for the door.

Griever yawned, showing his impressive array of teeth before rising lazily and sauntering after her. She didn't normally take him on her excursions so she led him back to her dorm room and locked him inside. It would only keep him there until the lock released around midnight so he could hunt and do his business, but at least she'd made the attempt.

While she trusted Griever with her life, the general populace was uncomfortable with him. It was a natural response; he was a predator, but he never acted like one around humans. He treated them as if they were beneath his notice. Nevertheless, because of the fear he incited she always tried to leave him behind—try being the operative word.

She practically ran to the Parking Lot to make up for the lost time. It was bustling with activity; a stark contrast to the empty, tranquil Garden. A team of six upper-classmen were hustling around five vehicles, loading people and luggage indiscriminately. She caught a glimpse of Quistis as she was shuffled into an SUV, but there wasn't time to call out to her.

Nichole scanned the area for who was in charge and was about to head over to the man shouting orders when Squall walked in, followed by Zell.

"Um." She saluted, not really knowing how she should address him. "SeeD Nichole Skye, reporting for duty, Commander…"

"At ease," he answered. "I appreciate the courtesy but you don't have to be quite so formal."

"Okay. What are my orders then?" she asked.

"You are hereby assigned as a member of the Sorceress Retrieval Team. You are to travel with the team to the Balamb Hotel, there you will be briefed further on the specifications of the mission. The team is to leave immediately."

The blood drained from her face. They were going to send her on a mission to retrieve the woman who had almost killed her? What the hell were they thinking? She cursed violently under her breath.

Squall's choked laughter snapped her back to reality. She'd forgotten where she was and who she was standing before. Zell's jaw had dropped so far she wasn't sure how his mouth could open that wide.

"My thoughts exactly," Squall supplied. "Off the record, I think putting you on the team is ridiculous, but I have my orders and you have yours. What's done is done."

"You'll be there, right?" He nodded and she continued, "Then I'll be fine. Who else is going?"

"Quistis will be there, as will Zell," he said, indicating the blonde beside him.

"Nice to see you again," Nichole said in greeting, "I wanted to find you… to thank you. I heard you were the main reason I passed the test."

Zell smiled. "It was nothin'. You did what they asked you to do. What happened after was just a fluke."

"We have to go now or we'll be late," Squall interjected, shuffling them to the last SUV. "I'll tell you about the rest of the team during the ride."

She buckled into one of the seats and Squall slid in next to her. Zell sat across from them as the driver moved out.

Squall finished his briefing while the vehicle made its way out of Garden. "The two others assigned to the Sorceress Team are Tobias and a SeeD named Seifer Almasy."

"Is Seifer the blonde bully from the orphanage?" she asked.

Although Seifer had never really noticed her, he'd targeted Squall and the other children ruthlessly. Squall had always seemed to be his favored one though. She remembered thinking it was like a sibling rivalry between them, with Seifer vying for the attention and praise that Squall seemed to get handed to him. It had been kind of sad, but Seifer wasn't one to be pitied.

Zell gave a bark of laughter. "Yeah, that's Seifer all right, he hasn't changed much."

"Seifer has grown up some, but yes, he was there. Zell was also there but was adopted before you came."

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "What a small world!"

Squall nodded. "Smaller all the time."

"Can I ask something?" she said after some moments of silence. "Why was I placed on the sorceress team? I mean no offense, but the woman just tried to kill me. Are they hoping she'll finish the job, or am I to be some kind of human bait? Neither sound pleasant, but I'd like to know just what I'm expected to do."

Zell's eyes bulged at her frankness—like someone had squeezed him too hard, but Squall just sighed, a slight smile on his otherwise serious face.

"I expect as bait. Adrian told me a little before you woke up about Rinoa being possessed and you being the target of her possessor. Is there anything you know that might help keep her alive?"

Nichole paused, wondering just how much of the story she should tell, how much Squall might believe. Tobias had told her of what the Sorceress… what Rinoa was to him. He deserved to know what was at stake. Still, while Xavier hadn't said anything specific about keeping her story to herself, Tobias had pointed out that they probably should keep most of it secret.

She was torn, but she took his hand, offering what comfort she could. "I don't know much more to the story," she said finally. "I know that I'm the target. I think that Rinoa was chosen for convenience and I will do everything I can to get her back to you."

Zell sat up. "All your friends are behind ya too, man. I think even Seifer wants to get Rinoa back alive." Squall looked up, a little startled, and Nichole wondered if he had forgotten Zell was there. While Zell searched for something else to say, Squall nodded.

"Thanks… I… just… thanks."

She hated giving half-truths like that, but she couldn't betray the others' confidences. The ones sharing her fate—Tobias, Gavin, Anne, and even Adrian—had been part of her life for so long that it wasn't a shock to find they were tied together by one more thing. What had surprised her, though, was the sixth child, Quistis Trepe.

Nichole had only been included in a group discussion of the dreams once, after she had awoken, but it was enough to learn that everyone's visions had been the same. One of four angels had visited each of them, all telling versions of the same story. Nichole knew from the others that she had gotten a more detailed rendition but she wasn't sure if she should share the missing information or not. After all, most of the absent facts weren't pertinent to the others, just more of the back-story.

The only variance they knew that she didn't was that the others were undergoing a process facilitated by the angels to get them ready for their towers—which didn't matter because, according to Xavier, she was already linked to hers. The whole air of the meeting had been a mild sort of nonchalance that baffled her until she found out that each of them didn't fully believe what they'd been told. It was understandable; the whole thing was rather unbelievable.

Lost in her thoughts, she barely noticed as the vehicle pulled to a stop, only looking up when Squall gently pulled his hand from hers.

She trailed behind the two men into the hotel and waited patiently until Squall handed her a keycard. "Thanks," she said.

Upstairs at her door Squall called, "Meeting in ten minutes in the conference area downstairs." He walked past her to his own lodgings. "Don't be late."

She nodded and entered her room.

Anne was inside unzipping a black leather satchel on the furthest bed while Quistis came in from the attached bathroom. "Hey girl," Anne greeted Nichole, tossing her a quizzical look. "What are you doing here?"

"You're looking at the official live bait of the Sorceress Retrieval Project," Nichole replied offhandedly.

Anne cursed violently. "Just what the fuck do those imbeciles think they're doing? I oughta march right down there and give that piece of shit Commander a—"

"I told Squall it was important to keep you away, why would he do such a thing?" Quistis interjected, talking over the ranting girl behind her.

"Look, Squall gave me the impression he didn't have much choice in the matter, so don't blame him. I have a feeling this is an order coming much further up the chain and tactically, as much as I don't like it, it makes sense. I'm an unknown factor."

Quistis sighed. "Yes, they would want to know exactly what importance you hold and pulling the Sorceress of out hiding would be a bonus those bureaucrats couldn't resist."

"Besides," Nichole added, "Squall looked really upset about it and more than that, I have a feeling he's panicking over Rinoa. Maybe with me there Valora will decide she doesn't need her toy anymore..." Both of them looked at her skeptically. "It's worth a shot anyway."

Anne growled. "You and your damn bleeding heart. I swear, sometimes I just want to strangle you myself and get that death-wish permanently out of your system." Her eyes took on a scary glint and Nichole shivered. Behind the façade of the happy-go-lucky gossip monger lurked a much darker being.

"I don't have a death-wish. Don't worry so much, I'm always fine," Nichole reassured her.

"You cut things way too close and you know it," Anne said curtly, "but I suppose killing you wouldn't help. You'd just find your way back to haunt me."

Nichole grinned. "Don't you know it. You can't get rid of me that easily."

"Who's on the SRT anyway?" Anne asked.

"SRT?" Nichole repeated a little dumbly.

Quistis explained, "SRT—Sorceress Retrieval Team."

"Thank you, Ms. Smarty-Pants." Anne rolled her eyes. "So who's on it besides you two? I figure on the stoic Commander of course… Hyne, Squall hasn't changed a bit… Still silent as a stone, and just a wee bit creepy."

"He is not creepy… and even if he is, that didn't stop you from having that 'minor' crush on him now, did it?" Nichole defended.

Quistis cracked up as Anne blushed. "Yeah, when I was like ten, which is besides the point. Who else was assigned?"

"Tobias, Zell, and a SeeD named Seifer, who you might remember from the orphanage." Nichole answered.

"Yeah, I remember Seifer," Anne said. "I also remember Zell, although he's changed so much I almost didn't recognize him; he was such a crybaby back then."

Quistis nodded. "That's right, you came a year or so before he was adopted."

"Now that I've answered your questions; why are you here? Squall didn't say anything about you."

"What?" Anne asked, "You don't want me here? Some friend you are!"

Nichole laughed as Anne acted hurt, pouting for all she was worth. "Fine. Gavin, Adrian, and I are here for a different mission. We'll be leaving tomorrow morning."

"Must be important if that's all you're going to say on it," Nichole noted.

"Yes," Anne agreed. "It's getting late. I should be getting ready and you two should be heading for the conference room."

"See you after then," Nichole called, following Quistis out the door.

Nichole followed Quistis downstairs, wondering just what Anne's mission entailed. The rest of the team were already assembled when they arrived, and the tension in the room was so thick it could be cut with a knife. She was barely able to wonder at the cause of it before someone cleared his throat.

The Headmaster stood with another man who was dressed in an expensive-looking, hand-tailored, dark blue suit. He was impeccably groomed, his pants pressed to perfection and his thinning brown hair professionally styled. His looks were soft, suited to someone who'd seen the finer things in life—possibly in excess. They contrasted sharply with his steely blue eyes; which had a cruel look to them and were fixed on her in a piercing stare.

"President Hart has prepared a presentation outlining the mission. If you would follow me," the Headmaster requested, walking past the gathered SeeDs and into the room, "we shall begin."

She turned to follow but stopped, as the weight of that malicious gaze bore down on her. Most of the others had filed through as the president approached her.

"What, you don't recognize me, Princess? I'm hurt. One would think that after our time together you would come to recognize every inch of me." The sexual innuendo attached to the words was unmistakable, but it wasn't the words that turned her blood to ice.

That voice… it was the voice from her nightmares. She was a child again, frozen in terror as the belt slid through the loops that bound it. _This is not happening…_ She prayed that if she repeated it enough, maybe it would be true.

The man grinned. "Ah, so the Princess does remember, I'm so very glad. You'll have to come see me after this little meeting, we have so much to catch up on."

He reached out, grabbed her hand and raised it forcefully to his lips. His grip was painful, but rather than snap her out of the terrible images, it served only to toss her further in. His lips were warm and moist on her skin.

His mouth twisted in a mocking smile as he let her hand drop. Without another word, he turned on his heel and entered through the double doors.

Her body shuddered with the relief of his departure.

The entire encounter had taken maybe thirty seconds, but to her it seemed like time stood still. A twinge of discomfort informed her that she had forgotten to breathe in his presence, and she gulped in air, chastising herself for letting him have that much power over her. She was no longer a child; she was a SeeD. She could handle it.

She wasn't even fooling herself. She was trembling like a leaf in the wind.

She turned, thinking only of escape and noticed that she wasn't alone. Tobias and Squall stood off to the side, staring at her in a mixture of pain, horror, and disgust. A second later Squall shook his head, his eyes icy as he walked past her into the meeting room. The fear twisted within her, burning away in the pure fires of rage as she realized what the man had implied for everyone to hear.

Blood pounded in her ears; her vision ran red with it as power surged from the very heart of her.

A hand on her shoulder had her turning, the energy at her fingertips begging to be set free.

She reached out to touch, to let loose the burning madness, and met eyes the mirror image of her own. "Calm down, Nichi," Tobias whispered, releasing her.

What she was doing flashed before her and she froze, as if someone had thrown a bucket of ice water on her. The power and the rage behind it fled, leaving her empty and chilled to the core. She didn't protest as Tobias touched her then, leading her gently into the room and helping her into the empty seat beside his own.

She bit back her tears as the man from her nightmares spoke once more. "Now that everyone is here, we may begin."

She stared blindly at the table before her, trying to listen to his words.

"The Sorceress has been spotted in the canyon along the Galbadia/Timber border, approximately here," he informed them, pointing out the area on the vid-map. "Her headquarters are rumored to be a series of tunnels that lead to a cavern deep within the cliffs. There are two known entrances, one approximately here, and another around here."

His eyes kept meeting hers as he demonstrated the locations and she shuddered under the weight of his gaze.

"A third entrance was found here, but the tunnel has since collapsed and will be of no use. There are no maps but the main tunnel is estimated to stretch for a half-mile. Your mission is to infiltrate the Sorceress' hideout, find her, and capture her, After which you will return her to Garden where she will be held until we can determine what threat she poses. If she resists capture, or at any point becomes a threat, you will eliminate her. Your leader will make that call." The twisted pleasure in his voice was unmistakable and Nichole flinched. "You have your orders. Dismissed!"

"How are we supposed to capture her if she can just magic herself away?" Zell mumbled from her left. Squall shook his head, mouthing 'not now' and the room fell silent but for the scraping of chairs.

Nichole rose immediately, forcing herself to walk calmly behind Tobias to the door.

A foot from freedom a hand clenched around her upper arm and she barely managed to stifle a shriek of surprise. She knew who it was before sparing him a glance, and jerked free.

"Uh uh, little Princess," he murmured, reaching for her again. "We wouldn't want to make a scene now, would we?" he hissed.

She shook her head slightly, all the acknowledgment she was willing to give him while taking note of the others. No one seemed to notice her plight and she wasn't going to call attention to herself. She was terrified of being alone with him, but it was better than allowing her shame to be seen.

"You weren't going to leave without saying goodbye, now were you, Princess?" he asked finally when the last person had filtered out. "I wanted so much to catch up. I've heard so many good things about my favorite niece."

"I'm your only niece," she ground out between clenched teeth, "and I have nothing to say to you."

His eyes went frigid with rage and she took an involuntary step backward; he didn't allow her the retreat however as his grip turned bruising. "Oh, I don't know about that. I'm sure you have plenty to tell."

She shook her head, her teeth clenched in a desperate attempt to keep herself from stuttering out all of the empty platitudes she had as a child. She couldn't bear to give him the satisfaction of seeing her reduced to a blubbering mess. She fervently searched for the power she'd had before but it wasn't to be found. She was as she always had been. Weak, scared, and alone.

His eyes flashed dangerously before he shook his head, his gaze traveling the length of her body. "You certainly have grown up well," he noted, relaxing his fingers to run his hand up her arm. A familiar surge of panic had her freezing under his touch. "Yes, very well indeed. You were such a sweet thing then, I wonder how you are now."

"D-don't touch me," she choked out, swatting ineffectually at the roaming appendage.

He smiled cruelly. "You never did learn your lesson. It's truly too bad I don't have time to remind you. Ah, life is such a fickle mistress. Say goodbye to your uncle now."

She refused, turning to walk away, but he jerked her back, pulling her flush against him. "Don't test me, Princess," he sneered.

Holding back tears, she stuttered out, "G-Good-bye."

"That's a good girl. I shall see you again, quite soon I believe," he said, pressing his lips to the corner of hers. She thought of the fear, she thought of the rage, she tried to think of anything but the feel of his lips on her skin. He pulled back, smiling before he stepped past her and out into the waiting crowd.

She stood in shock, trying desperately to fight down the urge to run, to flee from this place. She managed to quiet the instinct for one full minute before it overwhelmed her, and thinking of nothing but her need to escape, she rushed blindly from the room.

-oooOooo-

"Dismissed!"

Adrian Sprite gently sealed the hole that had been made connecting the small broom closet to the meeting room. The meeting itself had been shorter than expected, taking less than fifteen minutes, and he found himself wishing that all dignitaries could be as short and to the point as Galbadia's president.

He examined the small room, checking for any trace of his presence before exiting into the empty hall on the outskirts of the lobby. His orders were to watch the president without being seen, so he stopped behind one the decorative plants, just short of entering.

The scene in the lobby was odd. Nearly everyone had some sort of emotion weighing heavily on his or her face, and Adrian got the distinct feeling that it had little to do with the actual briefing.

He tried to catch Nichole's eyes when she pushed out of the room, but they were downcast as she made a beeline for the stairs, almost running into Zell in her haste. Faces darkened as she passed, and Adrian was sure that once again she was the center of whatever was brewing. She attracted trouble like moths to a flame.

Keeping her whole was a constant, exhausting task and Adrian wondered how the hell Squall and Tobias had managed to pull it off as children.

He caught Tobias' eye across the room and silently beckoned him over. Tobias nodded almost imperceptibly and Adrian retreated to one of the small alcoves lining the hall to wait for him.

"What'd she do this time?" he asked, cutting to the point when Tobias appeared almost twenty minutes later.

Tobias shook his head, refusing to answer. "We need to meet. Get Anne and Gavin and get them to our room now. I think Squall needs to be a part of this and I'll make sure he and Quistis get there. Be discreet, the other two SeeDs don't need to know of this."

"And Nichole?" Adrian asked, fearing the answer.

"She is not to be included at this time." Tobias' tone was final and his eyes hard as he left without another word.

Adrian cursed. It was as he'd expected. There hadn't been many group meetings where Nichole was excluded, but when she was, it was always a doozy.

He found Anne and Gavin in another alcove, wrapped up in each other and kissing passionately. He went a little green at the sight of it, wondering just how much was real and how much was for cover.

"You know, you don't have to pretend to enjoy it so much," he drawled casually. Gavin jumped like the proverbial kid in the cookie jar, but Anne just batted her long eyelashes.

"Who says I was pretending?" she asked coyly.

Adrian was torn between a scowl and a smile. His little sister was the second most irritating woman on the planet. He decided to do neither. "Emergency meeting in my room. Something about Nichole, and since she isn't invited it's bound to be trouble."

"Oh, Hyne, what'd she do this time?" Anne asked, her voice filled with worry.

Adrian shrugged. "Enough to have Tobias calling a meeting."

Gavin pulled Anne toward the stairs without a word, his lips set in a grim line and Adrian followed.

The others were seated when they arrived and once they got settled Adrian turned expectantly to Tobias. "Could someone please tell me what the hell is going on?"

Tobias' gaze jerked to him, but it was Quistis that answered. "Before the meeting with the president he pulled Nichole aside and implied that they've had a… relationship. Now, normally liaisons wouldn't be that big of an issue, but with the situation, we have to wonder exactly what her relationship is with him and why she hasn't informed anyone."

Anne's eyes had narrowed to slits. "She would never!" she spat. "I've known Nichole since the orphanage, have been her best friend since we were sixteen—she's had no contact with that man. She keeps to herself; she's never dated, never left the Garden for anything short of a mission. As far as I know, the girl is still a virgin. If you can't figure out that there is something else going on, then you don't deserve to be here."

Quistis reeled back, looking like she'd been slapped. Gavin patted Anne's hand to calm her down and got a glare for his effort.

"She meant no offense," Squall stated. "It doesn't sound like the Nichole we knew, but we've all changed from the orphanage, and considering what was implied, we had to be sure."

"Well then," Quistis continued. "If we don't believe the president, we have to figure out why he would say such a thing. How does she know him?"

Tobias shook his head. "I don't know. But there was something odd about their meeting."

"Go on," Squall prompted.

"You know how when we were kids Nichole and I could feel each others emotions?"

Squall and Gavin were the only ones that nodded. Adrian glanced at Anne, wondering if she'd heard anything about it, but she shrugged.

Tobias continued, "Well, after we arrived at Trabia I figured out how to shut it off and it's been dormant…"

"That's it!" Quistis mumbled, blushing when she realized she'd said it aloud. "I wondered why something seemed off between you two," she explained sheepishly.

"Yes, well, the bond helped us to find compromise, but it wasn't worth being driven mad over. She was slowly killing us both by sending me her grief."

"You mean you forced the link closed and then just left her to deal on her own?" Squall asked incredulously.

"I'm not heartless; she refused to be comforted… it was overwhelming. Yes, I regret it in some ways, but that's not really what we're here to talk about. I simply brought it up because today the link was forced open. She was terrified, to the point where it overwhelmed _me. _She knows him but that knowledge is only associated with fear."

He sighed. "However, there was something else. Something almost more worrying. After the president went into the room, some kind of energy surged from her. I tried to calm her through the link, but it was like it wasn't there. She turned on me and I thank Hyne that she recognized me, or she could have easily killed me—and if I had to guess, I'd say she would have taken the hotel with me."

The others gasped, but Adrian didn't care about Nichole's power. What worried him was the fear. He'd tried his damnedest to forget what had been said that day in Dr. Kadowaki's office, but he'd never been able to. It was always right there in the back of his mind, waiting for the moment his guard was down. He would bet his last dollar that her fear for President Hart and her injuries weren't coincidental.

It made him sick to think about it. He turned his eyes to Squall the only other who might make the connection. It took him a few moments but Adrian knew Squall had come to the same conclusion when his face paled.

"Oh my Hyne…" Squall whispered.

"Huh?" Anne asked. "What's going on?"

Squall shook his head, looking rather green as his eyes met Adrian's. The plea there was unmistakable and as much as Adrian wanted to ignore it, Anne had turned her attention to him as well.

"Adrian? You know something, don't you?" she accused.

He hadn't wanted to be the one to explain. How could he say it, when it hurt just to think about it?

She crossed her arms. "Well?"

"Have any of you seen what Nichole hides under all of those extra clothes?" he started.

"No," Tobias answered, "she's never without cover."

"She's shy," Anne defended automatically, "it's just her style."

"That could be true," Adrian admitted, "but there's a different reason for it as well, or at least there was. Her back and her legs were littered with scars."

Tobias' jaw dropped. "She managed to hide something like that from us all of this time?"

"No," Gavin informed him, glaring at Adrian. "I've seen them. It just wasn't something I'd announce. She obviously didn't want anyone to know."

"Everyone here needs to know," Adrian snapped. "I saw them at Trabia and kept quiet for the same reason, but I found out in the aftermath of the attack that the damage doesn't end there. Whatever the Sorceress did ripped every single wound Nichole had wide open. Without going into much detail, the scar tissue didn't stop at her back. It extends all the way up into her... her uterus."

Anne made a small strangled noise, covering her mouth with her hand as her normally dusky skin went ashen.

"So you're telling me that from Nichole's reaction today, that man was the one who caused this?" Gavin asked, his voice a deadly whisper that sent shivers down Adrian's back.

"What I'm telling you is that I think the president of Galbadia is one sick and twisted piece of shit," Adrian clarified.

"She was nine when she came to the orphanage. She was just a little girl…" Quistis whispered. "The question is, how are we going to help her? We can't just leave her to deal with this on her own. If what Tobias has said is true and she's that powerful, it's too much of a liability. If she loses control around the president, we're talking the death penalty at best, if not outright war. Even if he deserves it, we just can't let her make that kind of mistake."

Tobias nodded. "Is there any way you can get her off this mission?" he asked Squall.

"No." Squall shook his head. "I've already tried. Someone is putting enough pressure on the Headmaster that he won't consider it."

"Something has to be done," Quistis reiterated, "but even if I knew her better, I have little experience with this kind of issue."

"Neither do any of us," Anne stated, glaring at the blonde. "Adrian probably has the most experience out of any of us, being a healer, but I doubt even he has had much."

Adrian did a double-take at his name. Oh no… they were _not_ going to pin this one on him.

"Well, if he has the most experience, he should be the one to do it," Quistis stated.

"Isn't his relationship with her a little touchy?" Squall asked.

"Understatement of the year," Adrian muttered.

"Well, she's not going to kill you on sight, is she?" Quistis asked exasperatedly.

Adrian crossed his arms in frustration, seeing where this was going. It was like a train wreck: he knew it was going to hit but all he could do was stand there staring dumbly as the light barreled down upon him. "Depends on her mood, but probably not. I haven't done anything to piss her off lately. I've been avoiding her and that's exactly how I'm going to stay. Go find a new errand boy, this one quits. I don't even want to think about it."

"Neither does anyone else," Gavin pointed out. "I would talk to her but I think you might be better suited because you don't get along. She thinks you hate her, and if someone who hates her doesn't think anything less of her, it will have more of an impact."

"Does anyone here think less of her?" Quistis asked, looking around the room.

No, he'd never think less of her. To him she had always seemed just a little...damaged. Like there was some hurt that she just couldn't leave behind. It was easily lost in her fury, though, and that was part of the reason he had always provoked her. She had such spark when she was angry. It was breathtaking.

"She never wanted to be coddled when we were younger, so I'm not going to start now. She is who she is, that doesn't change." Squall said.

"That's right," Anne agreed. "She's not even different. We are because we've gained this knowledge and we'll need time for it to sink in. Adrian will buy us that time. Go on, majority rules." She pulled out her room key and thrust it at him.

He shook his head, automatically rejecting the task. Gavin might be right though: If he could find the words, he might just be able to do some good for her for once. Maybe it was a pipe-dream but it was worth a shot. He snatched the key from Anne's fingers. "Fine… but if this goes as badly as I think it will, you all are going down with me. I don't even know where to start."

Anne laughed. "Start with the line: 'Are you okay?' and go from there. I'm sure you can blunder through it."

He shook his head as he stepped headlong into the disaster waiting for him.

**AN: **I think my new posting day is Wednesday. I can never seem to find the time on Monday anymore. I would really, really appreciate any reviews/comments/constructive criticism; mainly I'd just like to hear what people think. Thanks as always to my lovely beta Kimmae.


	10. Chapter 10

**Warning: **Rated M for mentions rape and abuse.

**Chapter Ten**

Leaves me beaten on unholy ground again

_Balamb Hotel, Balamb Harbor, July 4, 082 ALC, 17:35 Hours_

The turquoise hall was eerily silent as Adrian made his way past each navy blue door, searching for the match to the key held in his sweaty palm.

He had known that he'd be chosen for the task as soon as Anne had opened her big mouth. Even had accepted it, knowing that only one other of the group would volunteer.

He understood why Anne wouldn't want to do it and it hadn't surprised him that Tobias was as passive as ever, but Gavin's prompting had been a shock. Adrian had never expected Nichole's quiet, protective cousin to trust him enough to let him within three feet of her.

Were his feelings really so obvious? The notion disconcerted him almost more than his mission did and he still had no clue what to do about that.

How was he going to approach her? Even with his training he had very little actual experience with the effects of sexual abuse. There weren't many cases that cropped up within the Gardens, and he hadn't been part of SeeD long enough to treat the rare cases that came from missions.

So how in the hell was he supposed to approach the subject? _Hey Nichole, I know what you've been hiding for years?_ As if that wouldn't get him shoved out the door faster than he could blink.

He had to do something though. More than ever, he wanted to help her, wanted to be the one to bring her comfort.

He was at the door before he felt ready and it was all he could do to not turn and walk away. His heart pounded, the sound seeming unnaturally loud in the quiet hall. He knocked twice, running a hand through his hair nervously as he waited. After a few moments of silence he face palmed at his stupidity and used the key.

He could hear the shower running as he walked in, the sound of the water barely muffled by the paper-thin bathroom door. Sighing, he steeled himself to wait, crossing the room to flop onto the loveseat.

Half an hour passed, with the ticking of the seconds feeling like Galbadian water torture as Adrian was torn between glancing at the clock on the nightstand and frantically searching for just what he was going to say that wouldn't instantly piss her off.

Eventually, fed up with his lack of answers and the amount of time he'd spent waiting, he got up and marched over to the bathroom door. Rapping his knuckles against the wood, he listened intently for an answer. When none was forthcoming he felt a shiver of fear. He knocked louder. "Nichole, are you in there?"

Silence was the only response and his mind immediately flew to scenarios of why she wouldn't be able to answer. He avoided thinking of the images as he grasped the door knob, and let out a sigh of relief as it turned easily under his fingers.

"Get decent if you can," he called out, "I'm coming in."

He counted to ten before opening the door. The room was chilled but there were slight remnants of steam clinging stubbornly to the mirror, leaving Adrian to wonder just how long she'd been in the shower.

Nichole's uniform was strewn haphazardly across the floor as if she'd undressed in a hurry. The trail ended at the shower curtain. He crossed to it, calling her name.

When he received no response his fear overrode his small sense of propriety and he ripped the curtain aside expecting to find her unconscious, or…. his mind automatically skittered around the alternative.

Instead, she was sitting in the bottom of the tub staring blindly at the light blue tiles above the spigot. Her knees were pulled tightly to her chest with her chin resting upon them as she rocked slightly under the cascading water.

"Nichole?" he questioned. He thanked his lucky stars that her long dripping mass of hair covered most of the things he shouldn't be seeing.

She didn't answer, didn't even seem to hear him. He reached down to touch her before pulling his hand back as if he'd been stung—cursing all the while under his breath. She was freezing and the water streaming over her was like ice.

Quickly he turned off the faucet before dashing to the rack by the door and snatching one of the large white towels.

"Come on, Nichole," he intoned as he draped the towel over her shoulders. "We have to get you out of here and it would be easiest if you walked."

She looked at him then, staring with a dawning apprehension as if seeing him for the first time. Her response however was not the one he expected. "I'm not done yet," she whispered, reaching for the tap. Her voice was raw and gravelly, like she'd been crying, and his heart clenched.

"Not done with what?" he asked, grabbing her hand to stop her from turning the knob. "Freezing to death?" He shook his head, pulling her hand away from the faucet but refusing to release it. He gently twisted his grip, running his fingers over her pulse point, taking comfort in the slower yet steady beat. She looked at his hand, a frown creasing her forehead, but she didn't try to pull away. "Maybe that was the idea…" she said, turning her face away from him. "What do you care anyway? Just leave me alone. I don't need you. I don't need anyone." She yanked her wrist free, pulling her hand back to hug her knees.

"I don't deserve anyone." The words were a barely audible whisper, but they seemed to scream in his mind.

"Maybe you don't need anyone, but what about the ones who need you? Gavin, your brother, Anne… what about them?" he asked.

She shook her head with a harsh laugh. "They don't need me. Tobias has never needed me, and if by some miracle he did, I'm sure some girl will come along to distract him and he'll forget about me like he always does. Gavin has Anne and neither of them need me as a third wheel. They'll be happy together. Hell, even you wouldn't miss me. You'd have to find someone else to torment but that's easy enough. So really, just leave me alone."

He shook his head, wondering just how to convince her she was wrong without telling her how he felt. "That's not true."

She sighed, turning her tear filled eyes to him. "Why are you even here? What? Are they all too busy again, so they send you?" She shook her head before he could think of an answer. "Never mind, it doesn't even matter. I'm sick of this, I'm sick of everything. I don't want to feel anymore. Just turn the damn water back on and leave me alone."

He was completely lost, had no idea whatsoever on how to fix this, fix her. He'd seen her depressed before, most notably right after she'd been separated from Squall, but this… this was beyond that. He'd never thought that she—this strong, fiery girl—could ever be so broken.

He wanted to cry, but more than that he wanted to tell her just how much she meant to him. He couldn't do it though; the thought of how much damage his confession could do to her at that moment terrified him.

"You know I can't do that," he said finally. "Besides the fact that it would go against the oath I swore as a Healer, it would interfere directly with my goal of making your life as hard as possible. So… you have two choices here: You can leave the tub on your own two feet or I can carry you. Take your pick, you've got ten seconds to decide."

She glared up at him, her lips twisting into a snarl. "You fucking bastard, rot in hell."

He grinned madly. Now that was the girl he knew. Spitting mad was so much better than teary and despondent. Anger he could deal with.

"Guess that means I'm carrying you." He bent down, watching closely for the tell-tale bunching of muscle before her fists flew. He caught her right hand, dodging the slap with the left that followed, before grabbing that hand as well and hauling her to her feet.

She stood in all her naked glory, glaring with a look that told him that if she had her way he'd be six feet under by now. He grinned, carefully keeping his eyes on hers, ignoring his desperate want to move them lower. The towel he'd put around her earlier lay in the bottom of the tub but he didn't dare let go of her arms to grab it, and so he was left standing rather awkwardly as neither of them moved.

He could see the rage begin to dim and her self-consciousness start to surface as she suddenly broke eye contact. "If you promise not to attack me I'll let go," he said, still keeping his eyes firmly on her face.

She nodded but said nothing, and warily he loosened his grip before letting her go altogether. She crossed her arms over her breasts for modesty; his eyes followed the movement, watching for an attack before he quickly averted his gaze again, feeling like a peeping Tom.

He turned, unwilling to let her see how uncomfortable he was. If she was back in her right mind she'd never let him live it down. Adrian—the same Adrian who had 'dated' most of the females of Trabia Garden—blushing over a naked woman. It was laughable. Of course she would never know that it was different because it was her... the only woman he'd ever cared for.

He grabbed the remaining towel off the rack and went back to her, carefully avoiding her eyes and the rest of her as he held it out. She took it, wrapping it around herself in one smooth motion before looking back to him.

"Come on," he said, holding out his hand. "You should get dressed, get warm."

She shook her head stubbornly. "I'm out of the water now, you can go already."

"I can't go until I know you're okay. I'm obligated to stay."

"I'm no one's obligation," she spat, "least of all yours. Get out!"

He shook his head; "I didn't mean it like that. Come on."

"Like hell. I'm not going anywhere with you." She crossed her arms, and glared, daring him to respond.

He grinned. "Wanna bet?" He barely gave her enough time to move her arms before he was upon her, grabbing one arm and using his momentum to connect his shoulder to her stomach and lift her onto it.

"Let me down this instant, you asshole!" she screeched, pounding on his back with her free hand and struggling to move.

He held her legs in a vice grip off to his side so she couldn't kick him, but the whole position was rather precarious. He had to put her down and quickly, or she'd get free. As it was, his back was probably going to bruise and he didn't need any more damage from this little scuffle.

He turned on his heel and carried her into the bedroom, trying desperately to ignore her shapely thighs as she wriggled. He prayed for patience, for luck… for a cold shower, but knew that most likely the sick fucks Upstairs were laughing at him.

What had he ever done to deserve this?

He pulled back the covers of her bed, dumping her unceremoniously onto it and whipping the blanket back over her before he could get much more than a glimpse of the body that was revealed by the now undone towel.

He cursed everything and himself most of all before snatching Nichole's bag and rifling through it. He pulled out her standard nightwear and some under things, relieved that they were plain cotton and not some lacy contraption. He would have run screaming at that point, considering that the alternative was _not_ an option.

Tossing them at her blindly, he bit out, "Get dressed and get that mess you call hair dry. I'll be in the bathroom, you'll have about two minutes before I'm out."

He didn't wait for her response, but was relieved when he heard her scramble for her clothes almost as soon as the door shut behind him. He sighed, leaning against the wall, tempted to bang his head against it, only stopped by the knowledge that she would hear it.

This had been one majorly bad idea.

He had come in with intention to... what? To tell her that he knew she'd been violated and he still didn't care? Fuck… he was screwed from the start, but he'd never expected anything close to the scenario that had just played out. And he hadn't even gotten to why he'd come…

He felt like the worst sort of scum. She was out there feeling lower than dirt because some piece of shit had hurt her and he couldn't get the image of her in all her glory out of his mind.

Hyne, he decided, had it out for him. Destiny thought he was her fucking play toy, and the rest of them couldn't tell their asses from the broad side of a barn. He hoped, at least, that they'd gotten their laughs in so that maybe, just maybe, the rest of the night wouldn't be such an unmitigated disaster.

Somehow, he had a feeling that it wasn't going to be so easy.

"Ready or not, here I come," he muttered, stepping back into the room.

She sat defiantly on the edge of the bed but she was dressed and her hair was damp rather than dripping.

"I'm out of the shower, I'm dressed. Will you please just leave now? I'd rather pretend this never happened."

Oh, Hyne, how he wished he could.

"I don't know…" He pretended to contemplate it. "You obviously need someone to watch you so you don't pull stupid shit like this again."

"Fine. I promise I won't do anything stupid, now will you go?"

He shook his head—he wouldn't have taken that promise even if he could've left. Her version of stupid and his were in completely different hemispheres. "Not until I know what happened to make you pull such a stunt."

Her eyes sparkled in fury. "When pigs fly."

"I have all night you know, and come morning I could always be transferred to the Sorceress Retrieval Team. Just think, a whole two weeks or more in the wildness with me." He smiled genuinely at the thought.

She shuddered dramatically but said nothing.

"Come on," he said, keeping his tone neutral. "I'm not going to bite. Did it have anything to do with your meeting with the president?"

She shook her head, pulling her knees up. "No, not really."

"I heard he implied something rather unsavory about the two of you."

She looked shocked for a moment before she sighed. "He implied that I've slept with him. Tobias and Squall heard the whole thing, I'm sure Tobias has already told you."

"And did you?" Adrian asked, both knowing and fearing the answer.

"Well… no, not as such." She avoided his eyes.

"Really?" he dug, wanting to do just the opposite, but knowing that if he could get her to spill her story that he wouldn't have to tell her that he already knew. "You're telling me that he just out of the blue decided to pretend to recognize you and claim intimacy?"

"No, of course not. I'm not saying I don't know him, I do… just that what he implied isn't exactly…" She stopped, her words trailing off before her gaze snapped to his. "Why do you want to know?" she asked, her eyes narrowing with suspicion.

His mind blanked entirely. She wasn't supposed to ask such questions. She was supposed to be a blubbering mess by now. Of course, she always had to do the opposite of what he expected. If he hadn't seen her despair so clearly moments earlier he wouldn't have believed she was capable of it.

"No reason. Curiosity I guess. How do you know him then?" he asked, hoping to distract her.

"Baron Hart, or as he was born, Baron Leonhart, is—as the last name indicates—my uncle."

"Wha—?" was all he could manage. _What the fuck… Really?_

"Yes, really," she answered with some chagrin. "He bastardized his name I guess, sometime after he left my grandmother's house. It suits him, a bastard name for a bastard son. He was the product of an affair my grandfather had with some prostitute. The woman died and her offspring was brought into the family like he was the legitimate heir. From what I'd heard my grandmother never forgave either of them for it. I can't blame her."

"So your uncle is the president of Galbadia?"

"I guess… I thought he was dead." She shook her head. "It doesn't matter anyway."

"Why would your uncle imply he's slept with you?" Adrian asked.

She froze like a deer caught in the headlights and all of the color drained from her face. "I don't know…" she whispered finally. "I can't think of any reason that he would want to reveal… perhaps just to remind me of the power he has over me. I…" She clenched her hands tighter around her knees as she trailed off and he fought his urge to say something, anything to break the heavy silence. "I… well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to tell you everything. After that little scene I doubt your opinion of me could be worse."

"I…" he started, wanting to tell her that nothing would ever change his opinion of her, and then he lost his nerve. "Never mind, just continue."

Her eyes shifted away from his as she fiddled with her fingers, but she spoke and that was all that mattered to him. "I don't remember everything. I… I don't really want to. My memories were taken from me the day I arrived at the orphanage and it wasn't until a week ago that they were returned. The angels felt it was better that way, better that I couldn't remember, couldn't act on my own fervent wish to cease existing. So when it got to the point where my life was at stake, Xavier was finally allowed to intervene.

"But I suppose I should start from the beginning. I'm not really sure why it came about, but when Tobias and I were less than a year old we were separated and I was taken in by my uncle. I know that Tobias was adopted by a family living in Timber but I didn't find out why my uncle had taken me until I was almost eight. It seems his father's side of the family was rich and bestowed each of the direct relatives with a trust. He'd blown through most of his own, so I became his meal ticket. He had no use for two children, so he took me thinking that a girl would require less.

"He wasn't around much in the early days. Until I was four my care consisted entirely of nannies—none of which lasted long. He traveled extensively in those days, and while I don't remember much of him, he wasn't unkind.

"It wasn't until I was six that everything changed. He came home from one of his adventures injured, angry and cruel. He fired my nanny on the spot, saying I was old enough to take care of myself. When the nurses weren't around to take care of him it became my job. I learned how to cook and I learned how to clean, but nothing I did seemed to please him.

"He would hit me when something wasn't to his standards, first with his fists, but then later he turned to using his belt. He was smart and he was careful to hit me where it wouldn't show if I wore what he called a decent amount of clothing…" She paused, staring off at the wall obviously lost in thought.

It was a few seconds before she shook of her stupor and a small sardonic smile appeared. "He recovered a few months later, but instead of going back to his adventures like I prayed he would, he stuck close to home. I continued to play at being cook and housekeeper, and the punishments for my failures didn't stop. He began drinking, heavily, first in the evenings, and then later all day long.

"The beatings became less frequent, but when he was drunk he became—strange. He'd strip me down after a beating and just stare while I bled. It wasn't long after that he started to touch me—little caresses that at first seemed like affection, but soon turned into things that felt wrong. I don't think I remember him being sober at all during that year, but soon after he returned to his frequent trips and his attention began to turn away from me again. It..." she trailed off, chewing her lip for a moment. Adrian wasn't quite sure what he could say to help her continue. He was a little surprised when she shook her head and went on.

"It wasn't until I was a few months away from my ninth birthday that his focus fell back to me. I did something foolish, broke a dish or something—I don't even remember what it was now—but he was livid. He beat me black and blue and then about halfway through he began to touch his…" She trailed off, and it took all of Adrian's might not to call out, to tell her to stop. He didn't need to know, he didn't want to hear this, but ignoring his unspoken plea she continued, her face ashen and pinched, like she was fighting to keep from being sick.

_You were so young…_ The words wanted to spill out, but he held them back, afraid that if he said anything he would ruin whatever it was that had her confiding in him. He couldn't bring himself to tell her to stop, as much as what she was describing disturbed him—made him sick inside—he didn't want her to stop. For the first time since they'd met she was trusting him with something of herself, something that no one else knew. It was humbling and exhilarating all at the same time.

"H-He began to do that often. Sometimes, he'd touch me like he had in the past, and sometimes he'd—he'd make me touch him…" She broke off on a strangled sob, her humiliation plain, but before he could tell her that he already knew what came next, she continued, her eyes hardening and her voice steady with resolve.

"The day after I turned nine he punished me for something, but this time it went further. I didn't even know what was happening, one minute he was beating me, the next he was ripping me open from the inside. I couldn't do anything but scream until he finished. I—" Her voice choked off and she buried her face against her legs to hide her tears.

He was torn, his hand outstretched in an attempt to comfort her but he couldn't bring himself to finish the gesture. Reluctantly he drew back, and a few seconds later she had composed herself enough to continue. "Somehow I made it back to my room before passing out. I woke up a day later and he was gone. I was in a daze, wondering why I was still alive. I wanted so much to die, to go to sleep and never wake up, but consciousness always found me and eventually I had to get up and move. It was the third morning, while I sat contemplating just how I could make my wish come true that Xavier came, telling me that I was to be sent to an orphanage.

"I had thought then that my uncle was dead… he'd always promised that he'd never let me go, that he'd hunt me down if I ever ran, but even the thought of him being dead wasn't enough to drive me from my most morbid thoughts. I was determined that I should die, that I should have already been dead, and so the angels decided that it would be too much of a risk to leave me as I was.

"They took everything that day, all of my memories. I awoke alone on the steps of the orphanage with my nightmares and my scars and knowing only my name. I hid my scars out of shame. I couldn't remember how I'd gotten them but I couldn't rid myself of the feeling that I'd done something to deserve them. I couldn't let anyone else see… I couldn't bear to reveal my shame. I know you saw them that day in Trabia. I wanted so much to thank you for keeping my secret but I was too much of a chicken to ever say it. I'm sorry."

The thought of telling someone had crossed his mind, initially… he'd even gone so far as asking Dr. Crissun about her injuries, but when the doctor had indicated that she knew of them, but wasn't going to say more, he'd dropped the subject, letting her have her secret. He'd seen no harm in it.

"I don't know what to do, how to act. I thought it was over… the scars, they were gone, and even with the memories… without that physical reminder I thought I could be free, that I could just pretend it never happened."

"But you can't," he said, "you can't because your uncle is alive, alive and ruling one of the most powerful countries in the world."

She nodded, tears filling her eyes. "I'm scared," she whispered brokenly.

Before he knew it he was by her side, hesitantly reaching out to her. "No one will ever hurt you again." She turned away as a great sob gurgled up. He pulled her into his arms, ignoring the way her body stiffened at his touch and simply held her as she cried. It took a while, but eventually her limbs relaxed against him.

He rubbed soothing circles across her back, planning in detail the demise of one Baron Hart. He wanted to break every bone in the bastard's body, skin him alive, heal him and then do it all over again. His mind would break long before his body followed.

"You know," he said when the flow of her tears stemmed and her sobs turned to small hiccups, "things like this don't magically disappear. In time it will no longer have the power to affect you, but you can't just ignore it and hope for the best."

She stiffened and he loosened his hold enough for her to create some space between them but refused to let go. She sighed. "Does it change anything? Do you think I'm disgusting now? Am I tainted?"

"No." He shook his head. "You are the most stubborn creature known to man, but you will never be disgusting or tainted."

Her lips curved, but the smile didn't quite reach her eyes and he wondered if she believed him. "I got your shirt all wet," she said, patting ineffectually at the stain on his shoulder.

He brushed it off, holding her hand still. "It's fine." She could have soaked it through and he wouldn't have cared.

She pushed away from him then, awkwardly finding her feet and he fought the urge to pull her back. She retrieved her brush from her bag, pulling it through her hair.

She seemed more at ease with him now. It humbled him, and more than that, it drove home that she was the same, exactly the same as she had always been. The knowledge of what had happened didn't change anything, Anne's words were true. He froze as he thought of her, of the others.

"One more thing," he said, and she looked up. "You were right about the others… they did send me to talk to you—not because they were too busy, but because they didn't know what to say." He sighed. "Your medical records were opened in an attempt to save your life and so they know, or at least guessed from Tobias' description of your reaction, what had happened. No one knew how to approach you about it. Hell," he amended, shaking his head, "I didn't know, but since I'm the Healer I got the short straw."

She stopped mid stroke, glaring at him and he cursed himself as he saw the hurt behind her anger. "Wait," he backtracked holding up his hands in an attempt to ward off her response, "I—I didn't feel like I was the best candidate because on good days you could care less about me and on bad ones you'd quite happily murder me."

Her eyes softened and the corners of her mouth twisted into a small smile. "I don't not care for you," she admitted. "And you earn every moment that I want to kill you… Tobias says you must get off on it, Anne thinks you like me and Gavin refuses to comment, but I'm more inclined to believe Tobias. You're a sadist."

The blood rushed to his cheeks, but thankfully she'd turned her back to him. His sister was a traitor. He'd never told her of his feelings but that she'd guessed so accurately and then informed Nichole rankled.

He was curious though; Nichole had said who she believed more, but she'd never said what _she_ thought. "Do you mean that?"

She turned, pulling her hair into a loose ponytail at the back of her neck. "What? The whole sadist thing?" She shook her head. "Well, no, not really. At least not on a grand scale, like whips and chains and that kind of stuff."

He laughed; he couldn't help himself as the image of what she was describing flitted through his mind. She blushed, crossing her arms in a huff, but he'd calmed himself enough to answer. "You are… one of a kind. No… I meant about the 'don't not care for me' thing. I thought you hated me with a passion."

"Wherever did you get that impression?" she asked coyly, daring him to respond. He shot her a skeptical look and she laughed. "Yes, I mean it. I've never hated you. You just have a remarkable talent for pissing me off. Although, you've been rather civil. Maybe I'll have to break down more often if it causes you to be nice to me."

Hyne, please… no. "No more hysterical female for me, thank you."

"I was not hysterical," she snapped, glaring indignantly.

He grinned. "Okay, psychotic then," he amended.

He barely saw the blur of the brush as it flew like a missile toward his head. He dodged at the very last second, but the enraged female that followed was much harder to avoid.

"I'll show you psychotic," she hissed.

He laughed, catching her hands and bringing his knee up to block hers in an ingrained move. He'd learned long ago that Nichole would always, always go for the groin shot. Thinking about it now he couldn't blame her much.

She snarled at him, struggling. He winced as she landed a knee into his solar plexus, releasing her hands in favor of guarding his stomach. She smiled triumphantly, shifting so that she pinned him bodily to the bed, holding his arms in a vice-like grip.

While the position was rather interesting—although he didn't think she'd appreciate that particular observation—it left him very vulnerable and so when he saw her eyes light with a very sadistic glow, he used his heavier weight to gain enough momentum to flip her.

Holding her arms above her head, he leaned over her torso, pinning her legs with his. She fought like a hell-cat, bucking and twisting beneath him. His body responded readily to the stimulation and he cursed heavily under his breath, his grip bruising her in an effort to keep her still.

"Stop!" he ground out between clenched teeth, trying desperately to think non-sexual thoughts. "Stop moving! I'm sorry, alright, I shouldn't have said that."

She immediately did as he asked, looking at him with concern, "What... what's wrong?" she asked, her eyes searching his. He looked away, hoping that his internal battle wasn't playing too heavily on his face.

"Nothing, I just may have been out of line, that's all."

"Who are you and what have you done with Adrian?" she demanded, looking at him like he'd grown a second head.

He laughed, releasing her hands, only to realize a second later that it was possibly the worst thing he could have done. She shifted, pressing into him as he bit back a groan. Pure stark terror entered her eyes as she discovered his condition.

She froze and he cursed, pulling away from her. "Hyne, Nichole, I'm not going to hurt you," he reassured, pulling her to her feet. "I'm not going to apologize for what was basically a natural reaction, but I'm sorry it scared you and I promise it won't happen again."

She was looking down, and he wished that she would look at him so he could know what she was thinking.

The next thing he knew she was touching him, her hand fisted against his shirt as her lips found his. His eyes widened in shock, his mind went completely blank. His skin tingled where her lips met his and without thought he deepened it, pulling her against him.

She gasped as his tongue slid against her lips, seeking entrance. The sound was enough to bring his mind back with a stinging clarity. He ended the kiss abruptly, realizing just what they were doing. As much as his body was screaming at him to continue, his head had enough blood left in it to know that she couldn't be ready. He pulled away from her, trying to gain some distance from her, from the heat she was radiating.

"I'm s-sorry… I-I s-shouldn't have," she stuttered out, looking down in shame. "Rinoa was right, I am a whore… a plaything, nothing more."

"Don't say that!" he spat, her words sparking his anger. "Don't you dare repeat that ever again! You are nothing of the sort."

She nodded, but refused to meet his eyes and he wondered just how he could salvage this one. He ached to pull her back into his arms, but what little control he had left was slipping and he couldn't afford to lose it.

He wasn't sure what was going on in her mind but he didn't want to be her punishment, or her crutch. He respected her too much to take advantage. Still, he couldn't fight the fact that he wanted to be with her, in any way that she'd have him.

"Are you hungry?" he asked finally, breaking the silence. He hoped she'd say yes… even though food was perhaps the last thing on his mind, because then he could find an excuse to stay with her just for a little while longer.

"A little…" she admitted, still refusing to look at him.

"Good, then we can get dinner. Do you want to go out, or stay in?"

She sighed, looking down at her attire. "Stay in, I guess."

They ordered in-room service and after a little coaxing, a couple movies. He went out of his way to put her at ease and eventually it seemed to work enough for her to sit beside him. She stiffened when he reached out to hold her, but after a few moments she relaxed once more.

Sitting there was like coming home; the feeling she brought out in him was undeniable but still he was reluctant to put a name to it, as if once he thought the words—even to himself—something would irrevocably change.

It was pathetic, really... he barely could remember a time when he didn't seek her out, but he still couldn't admit his feelings. He knew it was likely that she'd regret everything that had happened this night and steeled himself for it, but was unwilling to give up this little piece of paradise just yet.

She fell asleep some time before the second movie's credits rolled, curled into his side. Shortly after that the phone rang. He cursed under his breath, fishing for the receiver.

"Hello," he said as loudly as he dared.

"Adrian?" Anne answered. "What's taking so long? Quistis wanted to go to bed an hour ago and I'm about ready to pass out myself."

He glanced at the clock for the first time in hours, noting that it was almost midnight. "Sorry, I didn't realize how late it was."

"Didn't realize!" she screeched. "What have you been doing for the past seven hours?"

"Mostly what you sent me to do."

Anne changed the subject, her tone becoming one of concern. "How is she?"

"She's fine now. Actually, she fell asleep a while ago. I haven't wanted to wake her."

"How would you wake her by leaving?" Anne asked incredulously. "We've been waiting all this time because you didn't want to leave!"

Her tone was really starting to grate on his nerves but he held his temper in check. "It'd wake her because she fell asleep on me after the movies."

"The movies…! Okay, hold up… just start from the beginning. What happened after you left here?"

He grinned. "Oh, you know, I walked down the hall…"

"You know what I mean!" she screeched.

"Fine," he said. "I knocked. No answer. I used the key. The water was running in the bathroom so I waited thirty, thirty-five minutes before I got impatient and knocked on the door. No response. Door was unlocked, so I entered. Subject was in the shower—"

"Not a damn report either," she snapped, "although that was more informative. Just what happened?" she pleaded.

He sighed, and told her what had happened, but he refused to go in depth on what Nichole had told him of her uncle. It was the one confidence she'd ever given him willingly and he wasn't about to flaunt her trust. If Anne wanted to know particulars, she could damn well ask Nichole herself. Anne was as surprised as he had been that Nichole had only been dealing with her memories for a week before having the living, breathing nightmare shoved upon her. Adrian had had to convince his sister that it wasn't the best idea to carry out an assassination on the president, no matter how deserved his death may be. He finally got around to where Nichole had flown at him, all teeth and claws.

Anne laughed. "She didn't hurt you, did she?"

"Just my pride. We landed in a very awkward and embarrassing predicament on the bed."

"Oh, no!" She giggled out, "My poor, poor brother! However did you get out of that one?"

"I managed, and I'm not going to say anymore on the subject except that she's fine and I'm currently in bed with a woman I've wanted for years, fully clothed."

"You always were a better man than anyone gives you credit for, you know that, right?" she asked.

"Telling myself that might get me through the night. Some chaperones might help as well, if you and Quistis don't mind me staying here. I don't want to leave until she comes to her senses and kicks me out in the morning."

"I can understand that. I'm sure we can manage. I'll be there after I let the others know what happened."

Nichole was still sleeping soundly after he hung up and he shifted her so he could lie down all the way as he waited for his sister to arrive, but eventually he dozed off.

He woke once when they came in, the dim light casting a pale glow on their faces. Quistis whispered an apology for waking him while Anne just smiled. The light was extinguished as they found their beds. Nichole slept through it all. She turned away from him at some point but was still curled up, using his arm as her pillow. He removed the alarmingly numb appendage, replacing it with an actual pillow. Turning, he wrapped an arm around her waist, and basked in the peace being near to her brought him.

**AN**: Thanks to Kimmae and her awesome beta skills. Reviews would be greatly appreciated.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

So tired now of paying my dues

_Location Unknown, July 5, Time Unknown_

She was in a dream. She was as certain of it as she was her own name; she could feel the power of another's influence humming in the background. The dreamscape had changed—whereas before everything had been black, now white stretched on as far as the eye could see. Fluffy looking clouds winked in and out of existence around her, giving her the impression that she was somehow standing on air.

It unnerved her, and she wondered what would happen if gravity asserted its dominance. Could she fall to her death, even in a dream? "While it isn't likely, anything is possible, my dear," Xavier said, appearing in the space beside her. "You would be wise to remember that."

"I somehow doubt _anything_ is possible. If it was we wouldn't be having this conversation as I would have already kicked you out of my head so I could get some sleep. I didn't have the most wonderful day and I have a feeling that the rest of the week is going to make it look like a cake-walk."

He laughed. "Again, anything is possible; you just don't have the power necessary to get rid of me yet. I could teach you how to do it with what you've got, but that would hardly benefit me, now would it?"

Her lips curved against her better judgment. "No, not in the least," she admitted.

"Then I think we are at an impasse, but you out of all of them must remember that anything is a possibility. Your nature suits the aspect well, and while he can't control you, he will try to influence your actions to suit him. You must learn to control yourself, to realize that you now have the power to make possibilities into reality and that this power can work for or against you. You are ever changing—volatile, but for you there will always be a choice given to you by your heritage. For _her_…"—she knew he spoke of Valora by the way he spat the word—"there was none. It is not in her nature to be more than she is, and none of us looked past her façade to see the twisted, wretched creature beneath. The Creator made her suit his brother a little too perfectly."

"Won't the aspect be fighting to keep her then?" It was something she'd been wondering about since he'd first told her of the tower and her link to it. Why would it protect her when it should be invested in making sure that Valora won?

"Not as such. The tower is not quite so sentient as all that. When the Creator made his prisons, he meant to undo his brothers entirely—to reduce them to the basest form of their powers. It didn't work because of how much power they held and they retained some of their more flesh and blood characteristics. They know enough to know that they are trapped, and as such most of them long for freedom—especially the one whose very nature makes him refuse to be chained. He fights the hardest, but because he has no real consciousness he cannot understand what he is doing or that while he is bound to the inanimate shell, his power still flows uninterrupted into the universe."

"Couldn't Valora just tell him this?"

"Yes, if she chose to, she could immerse herself with the aspects core and communicate with what's left of him. We can't be sure why she hasn't."

Somehow, Nichole wasn't surprised that they didn't know; Valora wasn't the type of villain who spouted off her plans to all and sundry.

"We have gotten a bit off topic, however, and there is much to tell you in little time."

Isn't there always, she thought, before remembering that he could hear her.

"Yes," he agreed. "The Council is concerned with Valora's latest scheme and the urgency of what we are attempting has increased. The others will be attempting to link to their towers tonight, but since you are already connected to your aspect you will be getting another lesson, of sorts. But first… a warning."

The scene shifted. Suddenly she was back in the lobby of the Balamb Hotel, her uncle's wet lips on her hand. The memory played until she felt the power burning under her skin and turned ready to unleash it on Tobias. This time however, what recognition she felt wasn't enough to override her intent and before her eyes her brother's face _melted_ under the blast. An unnatural vacuum sucked all of the air into the inferno of her energy before exploding, blowing the building apart as if it were built of matchsticks. Debris flew everywhere spreading the firestorm that ate everything in its path.

She was above the town, watching as the houses nearest the origin blew apart and pieces of bodies littered the streets. The fires raged on, chasing survivors. Balamb Harbor was nothing but a towering pillar of flame.

"This is what would have been had you not severed your power," Xavier said as the white clouds reappeared.

Nichole shook her head, unable to respond. She collapsed to her knees, fighting the urge to be sick, while tears ran unheeded down her cheeks.

Xavier squatted in front of her, brushing away the drops. "You are a wonder, girl. So much the same,"—he rubbed his fingers together examining the moisture with an indecipherable look—"and yet so very different."

"W-w-what do you mean?" she choked out, sniffling.

He shook his head, his eyes shuttered. "Nothing, I'm tarrying over subjects of which I shouldn't speak. I have shown you what could have done to prevent such an event from occurring. You, out of all of them, must learn to control yourself."

"Tell me what my aspect is," she demanded. How was she to control something she had no knowledge of?

"So demanding," he admonished, "but the time has come. I received quite the lecture about my slip of the tongue the first time we met, but apparently you already have some idea about what your tower is."

"Chaos resides in the female mind…" she uttered. She had wondered if his words were literal.

"Indeed. I shouldn't have been so careless. The aspect is Valora's to command, but she shares with you the realm of Chaos."

_We're so screwed_.

Xavier laughed. "Don't be so melodramatic. For every aspect there is a balance. Chaos is just one of the six. It is strongest now only because the others have been weakened.

"While Chaos has been labelled as a dark power, it isn't. True Chaos is neither dark nor light, it can be both and it can be neither. It's unpredictable, its goal ever shifting. Because of its nature its tower Guardians are among the strongest of their kind; they must be to protect it. The aspect of Chaos is the easiest to access, the hardest to control, and the one most likely to cause an imbalance such as the one now.

"Valora was chosen to be its pinnacle partly because her nature suited it and partly because her will is the only one strong enough to control it." His eyes bored into hers. "Now when I say Chaos is not inherently dark, I mean the power itself, not the wielder."

"So it won't turn me into another Valora?"

"Anything is possible, but if you become as she is then you will have done so because of your own choices. There is little chance of that happening. The six chosen are in better balance together already than we ever were. Having that support will keep you from straying from your path."

"So what are the others' powers?" she asked. "And what specifically is Chaos' power? I mean it's a pretty broad term."

"Yes, very broad. Chaos' power lies in many directions and in many areas. It is the nature of it to wax and wane, to appear when you need it or to fail to manifest. Only Valora, or perhaps one of the Guardians would be able to give you the short answer you seek. As for now, you will be as you always have been, an exceptional caster of what the humans have termed para-magic. This is but the beginning of your range, however. Chaos has the power to shift nations, transform worlds, and consume the universe."

It was a lot to take in. How could she be that powerful? How could she manage to control something like that? Could she do it without becoming evil as Valora was?

"This is why it is essential that you learn to control yourself. As a pinnacle, the aspect is you and you are it. There is nothing that will stop you if you give in to your darkest thoughts. You saw what could have happened had you lashed out in the hotel, but that is child's play to what your true capabilities will be."

"If I have that much power—if Valora has that much power—why hasn't everything been destroyed already?"

"There are many safeguards and quite a few are in play right now, but generally the balance assures that no one tower grows stronger than the rest. The aspect that counters yours is—or was—just as powerful as your own. Anything Chaos chooses to influence can be countered. The other limiting factor is that you both share the seat of power. The towers are not designed to have two masters. For now the power is split between you. In a less extreme situation it would be up to the aspect's Guardians to decide who is better suited to the tower, but that isn't an option."

"Why not? Wouldn't it be simpler to let them decide?"

"Simple? Certainly. Beneficial? Probably not. The most powerful Guardian has been swayed by Valora's power. The only thing she sees is that Valora has kept Chaos strong. She doesn't understand that that strength will prove to be everyone's downfall. The other Guardian was more aware of Valora's nature and after the attempt to kill the weakened pinnacle he tried to sway the stronger Guardian into locking Valora out. Valora tricked him, binding his power into a trinket and his soul into a mortal form. We haven't been able to locate him or the trinket that binds him."

Xavier sighed. "Attempting the transfer of power now is not worth your life. It is enough that you are here, that the tower is linked to you, and that it will provide you some protection against Valora's power. With you alive the tower will never be truly under Valora's control."

"Okay… so, that answers one question, but what of the other towers? What are their powers?"

"I'll explain it the best I can, so bear with me. To truly understand the aspects I can't just give you a list, you must know how the balance affects each of them."

She shrugged. "Okay."

"Chaos and Destruction are the most closely tied aspects in the universe, but Chaos needs Life to survive. Order is Chaos' twin, its counterpart, one will not survive without the other, but both constantly strive for balance. Life is tied forever to Death, and Death is sure to follow wherever Life may lead. Life powers Creation while Destruction counters it, Death will always follow in Destruction's path, Chaos and Order rule all. If all is as it should be, the balance is maintained.

"The difficulty is that the aspects are never in a stationary balance; they shift constantly, one rising above the others until it shifts once more. The aspects require interdependence and we, in our foolishness, sought to be apart from the others, trying to keep the balance without being balanced ourselves. Valora has tipped the scales. As her power grows the others weaken, but eventually Destruction will follow and Death will consume us all.

"Valora won't rest until the tower is fully hers again. At this point, if any tower kills another, both will fall. That's the reason you have become so important, why she focuses on you. You are the only one she can afford to destroy, and the only one with a chance of killing her.

"I know that this is a lot to take in, but you have proven yourself capable. The future is changing as we speak, it shifts and slides. It will depend on your actions. Travel well, chosen one, travel lightly."

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Hotel, Balamb Harbor, July 5, 082 ALC, 07:15 Hours_

She awoke with a start, Xavier's last words echoing in the unfamiliar surroundings. Her eyes adjusted quickly to the dimness and she soon recognized where she was. The alarm clock shone an eerie red, proclaiming the hour.

Anne's bed was rumpled and empty and she could hear the shower running. Shower… Adrian… She turned expecting him to still be asleep beside her but found nothing. It was unlikely that Anne had left the room so early, and even more so that they occupied the bathroom together so she could only draw the conclusion that he'd left, probably sometime after she'd fallen asleep.

She thought up a dozen excuses for why he was absent but no explanation cheered her. That he hadn't stayed hurt and left little niggling doubts.

What if he'd been disgusted by her? What if he decided that tainted goods weren't worth his time? Hyne, she was such a fool. He probably thought she was pathetic, with the way she'd practically thrown herself at him. How was she ever going to face him?

Eventually her stupor was broken by the bathroom door opening.

Steam drifted into the room and Anne sauntered in looking nothing like herself. Her beautiful chocolate colored hair was now a garish platinum blonde that screamed 'I came from a bottle!'

"So you're up." Anne grinned. "What do you think?"

Nichole wanted to tell her to go dye it back but held her tongue. "I don't know… I'm speechless."

Anne giggled. "Dramatic, I know, but it looks real with the blue contacts I've got. I look like your average blonde, a bimbo through and through."

"Not all blondes are bimbos," Quistis stated, stretching.

Anne conceded the point, unwilling to go so far as to insult Quist's intelligence but it didn't stop her from getting the last word in. "Just most…"

Quistis smiled facetiously. "I'll give you that, but I've met more brunettes that fall into that category and some are simply brunettes with colored hair."

Anne scowled and Nichole tried to preempt the battle that was brewing. "So, I'm going to assume that you guys had dreams last night as well. I think Tobias will want to meet before we leave today."

"Yeah," Anne agreed, still scowling. "I figured as much, that's why I got an early start on mission prep. I was hoping it wouldn't wake you and miss beauty sleep here was snoring away."

Quistis snorted indignantly. "I do not snore."

"I call the bathroom," Nichole said, quickly gathering her things and heading for it. She collapsed against the wood, breathing a sigh of relief. She had probably taken the coward's way out but she was too worked up over her own problems to play referee all morning. Besides, if the two of them got tired of griping at each other they might turn their attention to her.

She didn't think she could handle it if they confronted her. She was still too raw to play it off like it didn't affect her. She forewent her usual morning shower, as even the thought brought out the ache in her chaffed skin.

She'd scrubbed herself like mad after the meeting with the president, but still she couldn't get the feeling of his lips off of her. When that hadn't worked she'd turned the water as hot as she could handle it trying to burn the feeling away. When that had just about the same effect as the scrubbing she'd simply had a breakdown right there in the tub.

She wasn't even sure how long she'd been in there before Adrian found her. The water had long gone cold, but it had provided a kind of numbing backdrop to the turmoil of her thoughts so she hadn't bothered to turn it off.

Realizing that she was staring at the tub, she sighed. She still felt dirty, but knew that a shower wasn't going to fix it.

She dressed quickly in her leather outfit, thankful that it hadn't been irreparably damaged in the attack. She kept the long-sleeve shirt on underneath after a small debate. The scars were gone but the layers had become a sort of safety-blanket and that wasn't going to change overnight.

Quistis was alone in the room when she came out, already dressed in her typical peach outfit with a wicked looking whip attached to her hip. It was no wonder her brother was head over heels for the girl. Blonde, beautiful, caring, and carries a whip. She was perfect for him.

"Oh good, you're done." Quistis smiled. "Anne went on ahead; we're to follow when you're ready. You can leave your luggage here, someone will collect it and get it back to Garden, but bring your weapon and anything you want to take with us."

Nichole nodded, grabbing her staff from where it had been when she arrived before following Quistis into the hall in silence.

She tried her best to avoid looking at Adrian when they stepped into the boys' room. Quistis went immediately to Tobias' side and Nichole was left alone, feeling out of place. Anne and Gavin were sitting together on the middle bed, but she didn't expect either of them to welcome her. She was a third wheel at best to any of them now.

She took a seat as far away from Adrian as she could manage, feeling more depressed than ever. She couldn't begrudge the others their happiness, but she'd never felt so utterly unwanted. She was a burden to them all, truly a burden to the world, but she couldn't see a way out of it.

She had thought that the others would be able to stop Valora on their own. Now that she knew differently, her sense of obligation wouldn't allow her to rest until she finished the task given to her.

"Now that we're all here, let's get down to business," Tobias started. "Each of us had a dream last night, all with the same message. We are ready to assume our aspects and fully claim our towers. We were told of our power and a little of the Guardians that now respond only to us. We were also told a little of how to keep the balance and that the relationships between the towers must be maintained."

It wasn't exactly how her dream had gone, but wasn't willing to call attention to herself to say anything.

Anne shook her head. "Actually, I don't think I caught all of it and I can't help thinking that it's the key. From what they've told us all of the other pinnacles led very separate lives. Alexis wasn't very clear on whether he thought our closer relationships would be of help."

Tobias nodded. "Xavier seems to think it will be an advantage, but I'm not as sold as he is. Either way, the six aspects are: Order, Chaos, Life, Death, Destruction, and Creation. From what I can tell, our relationships are already forming in the way our towers balance and counteract the others. I was able to guess everyone's tower just by knowing my own."

"My tower is Order," Tobias started.

Gavin snickered. "Didn't see that one coming."

Tobias ignored the comment. "That makes Nichole Chaos. From that point: Gavin is Destruction; Anne, Death; Adrian, Life; and Quistis, Creation."

"So our relationships?" Anne questioned.

"Are based on our own feelings," Gavin answered, cutting off Tobias' reply. "We would be this way even if we weren't the towers."

A silence blanketed the room as everyone contemplated his words. Nichole fought the instinct to look at Adrian. She caught sight of him out of the corner of her eye, but his face was turned away.

Quistis was the one to break the silence. "So, Nichole is Chaos?"

Anne laughed. "Yeah, that one isn't a surprise."

"_Hey_!" Nichole said.

"Oh, don't be offended," Anne admonished, "I didn't mean it as a bad thing. I think you add spice to an otherwise boring existence."

"Either way, that's why Valora is targeting her," Tobias added. "I don't know what she hopes to accomplish. Her tie to the tower must be limited at best now that Nichole is accepting the challenge."

Nichole shook her head. What _challenge? _"Valora still has complete control of the aspect. She has the loyalty of the remaining Guardian as well, making it 'not worth the risk' for me to attempt to take it from her. The impression I got was that the only reason she doesn't have the power to sever my tie to the tower is because she can't access it directly."

"So to take back control she has to kill you?" Gavin asked.

"Yes." Nichole nodded. "The tower is linked to me and will fight against Valora's control as long as I live."

"It all makes sense then—why she's only targeting you. But if you don't have full control over the tower then it must be up to us to put a stop to her, once and for all," Tobias said.

"No!" Nichole cried. "You can't kill her! The best you can do is stall her, perhaps weaken her, but if you strike the final blow both of you will die, taking the towers with you and destroying everything. Didn't you get the warning?"

"Of course… claim our towers, kill the psycho angel. I knew it sounded too simple to be true." Gavin said.

"So that means…" Quistis started.

"Nichole has to be the one to kill her, and conversely is the only one that Valora can kill," Tobias finished.

"So basically she's been forced on this mission to die!" Anne cried out.

Quistis nodded. "And there's nothing we can do to remove her from it."

"Thanks guys,"—Nichole smiled sardonically—"you know… for all the faith, I appreciate it."

"It's not a lack of faith, just worry for your safety," Gavin pointed out, "and a general frustration at our own inability to do anything."

Nichole nodded. "You shouldn't worry so much. I'll be fine… I always am." She lied through her teeth.

She wasn't willing to tell them the truth. Not after Adrian's reaction to it. She couldn't lose everyone else more than she already had. She didn't think she could handle being completely alone.

"I hate to be the bearer of more bad news," Gavin announced, "but if my team doesn't leave now we'll chance missing our contact." He rose from his seat. "I'm sure Tobias and Nichole will think of something, they always do…"

Gavin crossed to her, pulling her up and into a hug. "Be safe, my lady," he whispered into her hair. She nodded against his chest, holding on for just a moment longer as her eyes watered with unshed tears. He made no move to remove her, holding her tightly while she composed herself.

Her eyes were still glistening when she looked up at him but she managed to smile. "Thanks."

He nodded, squeezing her once more before letting go. "I mean it, listen to your brother and try to keep out of trouble," he added, heading for the door.

Adrian followed him out the door, turning at the last moment to say, "Good luck," to the room in general.

Nichole felt her heart bleed. Had she fallen so low in his opinion that he wouldn't even say goodbye? He must have been truly disgusted by her, but then… why had he stayed as long as he had? He could have shoved her away when she'd so foolishly kissed him, he could have insulted her then, told her how disgusting she was but he hadn't. She almost wished he had; it would have hurt less than this confusion, then his blatant disregard for her this morning. At least then she would know for sure.

What had she done for him to leave her like this?

She was so lost in her thoughts she barely noticed as Anne approached Tobias. "Take care of yourself, Red," she said, using the nickname she'd given him when they were dating.

Nichole noted the look of envy on Quistis' face as Anne kissed Tobias on the cheek. He nodded in response to a whispered question and they smiled at each other. Quistis looked like she would have loved to step in and give them both a piece of her mind.

Anne went to Nichole, pulling her into a hug, "Don't be too hard on Adrian, he's doesn't think badly of you, he's just being an idiot," she whispered, before saying, "Take care of yourself, girl."

"You know me…" Nichole reassured her, somewhat startled by her revelation. If Adrian didn't think badly of her, then why had he left?

"That's what scares me…" Anne said as she let go, following the others out of the door.

"We should get going as well," Quistis announced. "Squall and the others will be waiting and we have a ways to go today."

Tobias nodded and they gathered up their things. One thing was for certain, what happened with Adrian was truly going to be the least of her worries over the next few days. Her top priority would have to be staying alive.

As the team filed out of the bustling town and into the cabin of the flying ship known as Ragnarok, Nichole couldn't help but look back at the peaceful harbor. For a second the nightmare image Xavier had shown her overlapped the real one and she shuddered, shaking her head to clear it.

She would never let it happen. She'd do whatever it took to control her power and keep the rest of them safe. She had to.

**AN**: Thanks to my awesome beta Kimmae. Any mistakes still contained within are mine alone. Reviews would be enormously appreciated.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

I start out strong but then I always lose

_Vaulny Canyon, Timber, July 8, 082 ALC, 14:00 Hours_

The stagnant heat of the dimly lit tunnel wrapped around him, filling him with the same exciting dread the he'd felt every time he'd visited this place. Sweat dripped down his temples and glued his silk shirt to his back as he took one last longing look at the sunlight streaming in behind him. Turning on his heel, he started the long walk to the center.

His face was utterly composed, belying the unease he felt as he trekked deeper underground. The hazy glow of the naturally heated rock lit the way, but he had little need for the light. He could walk this path in his sleep.

The caverns were safe enough; the monsters roaming the canyon avoided the area, fearful of his mistress' power. The entrance was well hidden amongst the cliffs, and with rumors of the caves being haunted, there was little reason for anyone to be poking about.

As safe as it was he'd always scorned it. The naturally carved tunnels and the cavern beyond would never be fitting of his mistress' splendor.

Pulling out his handkerchief he dabbed furiously at the sweat trailing down his face. He made to announce his presence, but as usual his mistress was a step ahead of him.

"Ah, my love… my faithful servant, here undoubtedly to hand me more pathetic excuses about his abject failures."

He smiled in adoration despite her harsh words. She was as he had found her, all those years before. Fused into the rock wall of the cavern, giving the impression that she had simply sprouted there. The stone hid her legs and arms but her torso was fully exposed, giving him a view of her dark hair as it trailed suggestively over her full, naked breasts and down to her flat abdomen.

He couldn't count the number of times he'd imagined what lay beneath the stone, what pleasures he would take from her once she was freed.

In the beginning he'd followed her out of gratitude. She had saved him when he'd stumbled into her cavern, injured from a fall and starving. She'd taken care of him, all the while seducing him with her words and her beauty. She had promised him power beyond his wildest dreams if only he could free her. It had been with a heavy heart that he'd left the cavern and headed home to recover.

To his greatest surprise and pleasure, her voice had followed him there, whispering in the night, telling him of what he could do to please her. He'd wondered at some of her requests in the beginning, especially when it came to her interest in watching his niece suffer, but eventually between her threat of leaving him and the pleasure filled images she sent him when he did as he was told, he'd simply followed her without question.

But all good things had to come to an end, and his fantasy world had come crashing down a little more than eleven years prior when in a drunken stupor he'd left his house, and the girl his mistress loved to torture, to visit her. She had rewarded him handsomely for the girl's pain, but when he'd gotten back four days later he'd arrived to an empty house with not a trace of his niece's presence to be found. His love had been furious, inconsolably so, cutting him off completely and barring his entrance to her cave.

It was humbling to remember how desperate he had been to fix the problem, how much he had begged and groveled for just one more chance. He'd felt he would die for wanting her.

He had never been sure what had changed his mistress' mind, why she had called him back to her and placed him on the path to becoming the powerful influential man he was today. Whatever it was, his devotion was irrevocable; she'd delivered everything he'd ever wanted and more.

It was all finally coming together. Even with the setbacks, with the return of his damnable niece, things were lining up nicely. Soon his love would be free and he would finally have what he wished for most.

"I'm waiting…" she prompted impatiently.

He smiled sheepishly. "I apologize, my love, I was simply admiring the view. Everything is as it should be; the girl is on the team as you requested. They should arrive within the week."

"Good… if sleeping beauty there holds up"—She gestured to the slumped form of the Heartilly witch—"I shall be free. Go back to your office and make the preparations for my triumphant return."

"As you wish."

-oooOooo-

_Deling Palace, Deling City, July 12, 17:55 Hours_

The palace shone in the darkening night, casting an artificial glow on the grounds outside. The building itself was a little overwhelming in its intensity, made up of a hodgepodge of styles. It was impressive in size, richly decorated, and heavily favored the Galbadian colors of red, black, and gold.

With Deling's rule its main purpose had been as a personal home, but now it had become the 'democratic' cabinet's center of state. The residence had been reconverted into the palace it once was and opened to housing as many dignitaries and their staff as it could hold.

Anne had been assigned a room at the heart of the building and living at her place of work had provided her with an immediate in amongst the staff. It also gave her access to the Lounge where the general populace spent their free time indiscriminately. Something about having a place of their own provided a sense of security that opened tight lips and loosened tongues and within the first few days her not too bright, terribly naïve, and eternally cheerful Mandy persona had gathered enough sordid information to blackmail half the cabinet.

She'd wondered how the higher ups hadn't noticed the blatant security risk, but she supposed with all of the other precautions they probably thought themselves safe from anything. Fools.

In the beginning she'd been excited, had even enjoyed herself. She was a plant in the cabinet of the most powerful government in the world and they didn't have a clue. That knowledge still gave her some exhilaration; at least until she was reminded that she was at the beginning of her second week and had nothing to show for it besides a constant aching cramp in her cheeks. The idiotic personality assigned to her and the ridiculously stupid people she was forced to make friends with were beginning to truly get on her nerves.

Anne was once again more than ready to retreat to her room where she could drop the act just long enough to work out the muscles in her jaw before heading off to the lounge for her nightly bout of intelligence (or stupidity as the case may be) gathering.

Her shift—manning a desk in the Presidential Office—was almost at an end. Her job was hands down the most boring part of her task; working eight hours a day as Baron Hart's personal undersecretary. She'd been pleased that Garden had secured her a job working so close to the president, one that would suit her purposes well but he had been mysteriously absent. Away from the palace on 'personal' business—sans his staff—since shortly before her arrival.

From what she'd been able to garner, Baron Hart was an almost obsessively meticulous man, preferring his office neat, his suits pressed, his wine chilled and his second secretary to be pretty, young, and buxom. He scheduled everything down to the minute—even his personal time, but was very private about what he did with it.

_Probably out raping little girls_, she thought, fighting to keep the scowl off of her face. She couldn't afford to let her smile falter even for a second. She was never alone when she was working. The first secretary was always present and watching with her hawk-like grey eyes.

From looking at his secretary number one, Anne almost understood the President's requirement that his undersecretary be attractive. It must provide some respite to look upon beauty after dealing with the old battle-ax. First Secretary Hilda Burnsine was exacting, harsh, and cynical; something Anne would have been able to handle easily as herself, but under the guise of her Mandy persona, Hilda simply terrified her.

Anne placed another document on the pile that would join those headed for the President's desk. It was a simple petition from a plumbers' union that wanted to broaden their base of operations. Technically she wasn't supposed to be reading anything, but she'd always been good at speed reading and so far hadn't been caught.

Her job, as it had been described to her, was to sort the President's mail, handle all of the shredding for the office, and perform any tasks that Hilda assigned her. If President Hart had been on-site, her duties would have shifted into the realm of personal assistant.

Hilda's job parameters were more ambiguous. Anne wasn't quite sure what she did with all of her time beyond doing the scheduling and answering phones, but she didn't dare ask. Mandy would have never thought of such a thing. Whatever it was, it kept Hilda decently busy, which meant that even though her eyes were always on Anne, she was out of her hair for the most part.

Anne glanced up at the clock, trying to be nonchalant in the action, but unable to resist the temptation it provided. Two more minutes… one hundred and twenty seconds and she would be free.

Hilda always left punctually at 18:00 hours, generally leaving Anne behind to finish up some task or other. Those few minutes of freedom were the only reason for her to be there. Adrian was hoping something might come of her limited access, but so far nothing was out of the ordinary.

Oh, there was corruption and misdeeds aplenty but nothing directed towards Garden or Nichole. The lack turned what Anne thought was going to be a bout of heart-racing, glamorous subterfuge into a monotonous task.

The top drawer of the filing cabinet slammed shut, jerking Anne out of her thoughts and back to her task. Hilda cracked her bony fingers in a habit that always put Anne's teeth on edge. Stretching out her claw-like digits, Hilda cleared her throat. "I'll be going home now," she stated, as she did every night. "Mind the emergency line and let the others ring to the answering service. I expect you to finish what you've got there before you leave. The President will be returning tonight and he'll expect everything to be ready for him. These here," she said, pointing to a neatly stacked pile of papers on her desk, "are to go into the President's inbox. Put your pile on top of mine and take it all in there. Lock up everything when you're done and slide the key into the slotted drawer of my desk. Understand?"

"Yes, ma'am," Anne drawled in the higher pitched Galbadian provincial accent she'd perfected for her mission.

Hilda gave her a short, stern nod and handed Anne the keys to the office before gathering her things.

A true smile graced her features for the first time that day. "Have a nice evening, ma'am."

Hilda said nothing in return as per her usual habit, instead giving one long glare of scrutiny before turning on her heel and marching out of the office.

If Anne could have risked it she would have danced a jig right there on the spot. As it was, her smile was beaming as she slumped against the back of her chair. She couldn't bring herself to care that she was just a little too happy for her alias. If she was, so what? She doubted the fools on security detail truly cared about a silly naïve secretary. Her plan was perfect and now… now she had the keys to the kingdom in her hot little hand.

Finally the chance she'd been waiting for had come. She knew the Presidential Office's layout by heart, had diligently memorized all of the security camera placements. This was it, her chance to see the inner sanctum for herself.

She scanned through the rest of the papers on her desk in record time for 'Mandy' but not quite as quickly as she could have. She wouldn't blow her cover if someone _was_ manning the cameras focused on her desk.

Straightening the finished pile, she stood up and gathered it into her arm. She crossed to Hilda's desk, already scanning the first page of the pile sitting there. It was a contract of some sort that didn't interest her, so as subtly as possible she slid it to the bottom as she picked up the pile and placed it on hers.

She read the next one, acting like she'd forgotten something and going back to her desk to rifle through the drawers. Again it wasn't of interest. She picked up the stack with some other papers that had been in her shredding pile and headed to the one blind spot in the entire room—the large paper wastebasket and the shredder above it.

She'd never been sure why they'd left such a place off the security grid. She paused long enough to toss the papers to be shredded into the bin before speed reading her way through Hilda's pile of papers.

She almost didn't catch it. The wording was so subtle, masked by both legal jargon and code but there it was. She had found it; the connection between the Presidential Office and the attempt on Nichole's life. It was a letter, written by a very angry sounding doctor who was complaining about payment being delayed. The best part was that the idiot had included a copy of the original contract to better illustrate his points.

Her hands shook in excitement as she clutched the papers to her. Hurriedly, she stuffed the contract down her bra, adjusting herself so it wouldn't show then headed for the President's office. She had to force herself to appear calm as she crossed to the President's desk and did as she'd been instructed with the papers.

The need to get the documents out overrode her objective of rifling through the office, so she turned on her heel and left, locking the door behind her. After placing the keys where Hilda had indicated, she gathered her things and clocked out.

She debated going to her room but with the papers buried against her skin she decided against it, choosing instead to head straight for where Adrian was supposed to meet her.

He met with her nightly, always in some out of the way hardly monitored area. That night the meeting place was set as an old utility closet that barely saw use anymore. She headed in the direction of her room, in full view of the cameras before slipping into their blind zone and dashing for the corridor leading to her meeting place.

It was a rush, playing what was essentially a very adult version of 'red light, green light' as she made her way through the halls. She stopped just before the closet door, in the only blind spot to be found and caught her breath as she waited for the camera to turn.

The thirty second cycle—a cycle that all the cameras seemed to be calibrated to—finally ended and she slipped inside the door. The room was tiny, dark, and covered in copious amounts of dust and grime, but it would serve their purposes nicely.

She scanned the area for traps and bugs—of both the mechanical and biological kind—before settling down into a kind of relaxed crouch. From her position she could see and disarm anyone coming through the door before they knew she was there.

If Adrian took the news of her findings as she thought he would, they'd be leaving that night and then she'd be able to see Gavin again. She hadn't even been able to speak to him the entire time of the mission and she missed him terribly.

She glanced impatiently at her watch; Adrian was supposed to have met her by now. She looked around nervously, searching for a good place to stash the documents in case she was caught. It was five more minutes before the short taps of the code she and Adrian had worked out sounded against the wooden door. Seconds later he was inside, glancing warily around the room before his eyes rested on her.

His face was drawn into a worried frown as he performed his own sweep for devices. "They've increased the security tonight, I'm getting a feeling I don't like. I think it might be time to scrap this part of the investigation."

Anne smiled; he always was a worrywart. "The President is due back tonight or sometime in the morning, of course the security has been increased. Either way don't get too far ahead of yourself. Look at these"—she pulled the papers from their hiding place and handed them over—"I think you'll find them very interesting."

He glanced at her, still frowning, before snatching them up. His eyes scanned through the words almost faster than hers had, before he started again, reading more carefully this time. She expected him to smile, to praise her for a job well done. She'd gotten what they'd hoped for and more, but by the time he was through his frown was practically a scowl.

"Where did you get this?" he demanded.

Hyne, he was such a kill-joy. "From Hilda's desk. She left me with the task of delivering our day's work into the Presidential Office. It was towards the bottom of her stack."

"This is just too neat, too perfect, the documents too damning. You were meant to overhear something incriminating, not have the kill contract fall into your lap," said Adrian.

Maybe he had a point, she admitted reluctantly. It had been rather easy to sneak it out of there, but it also could've been due to the serious lack of security or the fact that she was just that good. There could be many reasons why the crooks hadn't thought to hide the evidence better. Stupidity was at the top of her list.

"Look," she said, hoping to appease him, "either way we have enough now to shut down the operation like you want and still achieve our goal of in, out, and no one the wiser."

"Good, go pack your things. We'll leave right now. I don't want you here when the president shows up."

Anne shook her head; she wasn't in any danger, he needed to think of Gavin. Gavin, who'd been assigned to the slums of the city, following the group of mercenaries suspected to be the ones who'd executed the failed contract. "No. Get Gavin out first. It'll be a lot easier to make someone disappear from the streets and I don't need you here while I follow through with my exit strategy. Get him and get back here; I should be done by then. I'll slip past the guards and wait for you at the rendezvous point."

Adrian crossed his arms. "You're coming now. I don't like the feel of this place. I need to know that you're safe."

"Don't worry so much. I haven't been discovered yet, it doesn't make any sense to blow the mission now by storming out of here. This is supposed to be incognito, remember?"

"I remember, Anne," he snapped, and she knew he was reaching the limit of his patience; he almost never addressed her by her name. It was always darling, or rarely, the hated Annie—never Anne.

"If you're worried about me, that's just all the more reason for you to take the documents and get the hell out of here. The faster you retrieve Gavin, the faster you can get back and we can leave this rotten city." She knew he wouldn't be able to refute that logic and therefore wasn't surprised when he simply sighed and left, slipping the documents into his jacket.

Guilt weighed on her as she waited the few minutes to allow him to get clear so she could follow. She knew he was angry, an anger that was only due to the amount of love and worry he had for her.

It wouldn't take her long to be out of there, though. They'd notice if the undersecretary just disappeared, but to have one quit would just add fuel to the rumors that the position was cursed.

She made her way to her quarters with little struggle. Once there she packed all of her belongings in a rush before penning a note to Hilda in the overly flowery script she'd adopted for Mandy. She wrote to explain of a sick mother with no one to take care of her, apologizing for her abrupt departure, telling them where they could send her wages—an address in Winhill that hadn't been used in ages—then signed it with a flourish.

Folding it in two, she gathered her bag and took one more look around to make sure that she hadn't forgotten anything. Screwing on her Mandy smile she strode confidently out of her room and toward the offices.

For all that Adrian had complained about tight security, the halls around the residential areas and into the office corridors were rather empty. Which wasn't out of the ordinary, regular work hours had ended and most of the staff would either be in their rooms or in the all-hours lounge celebrating the end of the day.

Using her key she stepped into the large room leading to the offices. The offices themselves were dark… darker than she'd ever seen them, although—as she reminded herself—she'd never sneaked back in after hours before.

She made her way blindly towards where she knew the secretarial office was, relying on her mental map of the area to guide her. She forced herself to giggle openly and jump at some of the shadows, as Mandy would have.

She didn't have to pretend her squeak of surprise, however, when the lights burst on over her head, blinding her momentarily just as she reached her desk.

"Well, well, well… what do we have here?" a male voice, rough and low, asked. "Returning to the scene of the crime… Not too bright if you ask me."

She turned towards the speaker to find a skinny, light-skinned man with a hooked nose and sharp brown eyes leaning against Hilda's desk. His partner, a huge man both in height and girth, stood looming over him from behind it. The partner was thickly muscled, his face deeply lined and badly scarred. One of his eyes was sealed shut but the other was a pale blue, gleaming with a look that made her spine crawl even as she plastered on Mandy's smile.

"And what is this?" the skinny man asked, moving to her with a speed that sent alarm bells screaming in her ears. She fought the urge to fall into a defensive move, to not react at all as he ripped the note from her fingers.

She wished fervently for her Essence Junction, cursing her own ego-based stupidity as he read through her words.

"Ah, a family emergency, is it? How convenient." His smile was cruel as he crossed back to Hilda's desk, placing the note where she'd be sure to see it in the morning.

Anne found her words, praying she could somehow salvage the situation. "I'm sorry. I don't understand. There must be some mix-up here. I only came to deliver my note. My mama's real sick, you see, and I need to go to her."

'Mr. Slim' shook his head. "I'm afraid mama will just have to wait. There's been a theft and you'll have to come with us to answer some questions."

Her heart stopped. She struggled to keep the persona up, knowing that now—more than ever—her life depended on it. She'd been caught, but for the life of her, she couldn't figure out how.

She managed to nod, pasting a look of mild concern on her features. "Of course, I'll answer any questions I can, Mr.–?"

"Hayes. My associate Kyser will lead the way," he said, indicating the beefy man behind him, who grunted his affirmative and started for the exit.

"I'm sure we can get this little-mix up straightened out," she replied with a cheer that she didn't feel.

"I'm counting on it." Hayes grinned before sweeping his arm out. "After you."

Everything in her protested at letting the man out of her sight but she managed to ignore it, focusing instead on putting one shaky foot in front of the other. She thought about using the tower she'd been given, of simply killing the two men but wasn't convinced that she wouldn't suffer some sort of back-lash from abusing her new found power.

Alexis, the angel assigned to look after her, had warned her that she shouldn't dabble with Death until she knew exactly what she was doing. His words had put a good deal of trepidation into her about what she could and couldn't do with her tower.

She bit back a laugh as they traveled down yet another hall. Adrian was going to give her one hell of an "I told you so."

She was well and truly lost by the time Kyser stopped before a door that looked like every other door lining the hall. He fumbled in his pocket for a key before twisting it into the lock. As soon as the door was open Hayes shoved her inside.

She blinked a few times, crumpling to the ground in a facsimile of stumbling and let out a whine of protest. The light flickered on as Kyser lifted her bodily by her arm and placed her roughly on her feet.

A single bulb hung in a suspended cage over a shiny metal table with high-backed metal chairs on either side. She held in her sigh of relief; it was a standard Galbadian interrogation room and not the torture chamber she'd half-expected. Kyser guided her to a chair, shoving her down before stepping to the wall behind her, out of her line of sight.

Hayes took the seat across from her, resting his elbows on the table before him and bringing his long spindly fingers together to form a pyramid before his chin. "Where is your team?"

It was an unnerving move on his part and she fought to show only confusion as she answered. "I don't know what you mean. I'm not on any team. I mean I guess I could be on the President's team, if that's—" Her words cut off abruptly and pain bloomed across the back of her skull as her hair was yanked hard enough that her head smashed against the back of the chair.

Stars exploded across her vision and she let out a wail that would have made a baby proud, turning on the water works.

"Hair's real," Kyser grumbled from behind her.

"Of course it's real," she sniffled. "I was born with this hair. Why'd you have to pull it? I could've said so."

"Cut the crap, bitch," Hayes snapped, "we know you're working for SeeD. You took the bait so nicely; we couldn't have planned it better. We were prepared for the inevitability of SeeD humbling us with their presence. Of course I never expected it to be such a pretty looking toy. My partner here is very pleased... he likes the pretty ones."

Kyser's hot breath whispered across the back of her neck and she barely suppressed her shudder as Hayes continued his speech. "There was only one hitch to our wonderful plan… we haven't been able to track down your partner, or partners. What's a normal SeeD team…? Three? Ah, yes… they assign you in groups of three. So I'll ask once more: Where is the rest of your team?"

She barely felt the first touch of fingers against her hair but this time she was ready for the pull, using her hands and feet to shove against the table, knocking over Hayes, while tipping her chair backwards with the momentum, tripping up Kyser.

She flipped, landing with both feet on the fallen giant's back as he grunted in pain. She dismounted as Hayes scrambled to his feet, coming at her with deadly speed. She dropped into a crouch, dodging his first blow and the skinny black wand he held, sweeping his feet from under him with one smooth gesture.

She rose, aiming a kick to his skull, but wasn't fast enough as he brought the stick up, touching her leg. Pain radiated from where it touched and she cried out, missing entirely that Kyser had regained his feet and was behind her. She barely felt the blow to her head that took her swiftly into unconsciousness.

When she came to, it was slowly, painstakingly. Her head felt heavy and light all at the same time and somewhat detached, as if her mind wasn't quite connected to her body. Her vision blurred as she opened her eyes, the shapes grayed out and distorted.

She couldn't for the life of her remember where she was or how she'd gotten there but then the pain penetrated her fog and she couldn't bring herself to care. She was drowning in it; a deep dark sea of agony. Her vision cleared bit by bit until she was able to see the skinny harsh looking man smiling cruelly as he stood off to the side. Hayes, her heavy mind supplied.

Which meant the large man carving into her was Kyser. The blade glinted in the light, slicing through the flesh of her stomach as if it were butter. He was diligently writing a message but there was so much blood she couldn't tell what he was trying to spell.

She was terrified, but at the same time dispassionate, as if her fear was somehow separate from her. She struggled, shying away from the blade, only to find that she couldn't move.

She was bound, her arms outstretched, anchored to hooks that jutted from the ceiling while her feet were tied together to a ring of metal in the concrete floor.

"Enough," Hayes bark out suddenly, "she's awake now. We'll see if she's ready to talk, if not… well, you'll get to have your fun."

She barely registered the words but the relief from the pain cleared some of her confusion. Her head fell to the side, her panicked eyes meeting Hayes' glittering ones. "You can't be thinking too clearly with the amount of serum we gave you, so let's make this quick, shall we? Where are your teammates?"

"Teammates?" she repeated, her tongue feeling like lead within her mouth. _My teammates?_

"Yes, yes." Hayes nodded. "Your teammates… tell me about them."

Alarms rang in her aching head at the words; there was something… something he must not know. "What teammates?" she asked.

Hayes shook his head violently, barking at Kyser. Then the pain was back and her mind was unable to process more than the simplest of things. She let the waves take her far away from the man who screamed: "Where are they? Where are the SeeDs? Where are your teammates?"

"This isn't working," Hayes bit out sometime later. "We'll have to try a new method."

The slicing stopped abruptly, leaving her gasping for air. Hayes tapped a skinny black wand in his palm as he approached and unconsciously her body recoiled away from him, from the stick that sent her mind screaming 'danger!'

Hayes' lips curved. "So, you remember my little toy here. Good. I'll ask you one last time before I use it, where is the rest of your team?"

Only one word floated up through the haze, one she believed with all her heart. "Safe."

Hayes growled, bringing up the rod to touch her hand. Fire… fire blossomed from where flesh met metal, burning slowly, maddeningly up her arm. She recoiled, but had nowhere to go as he trailed the wand teasingly across the inside of her wrist.

"Where are they?" he asked as she clenched her teeth against the onslaught, tasting the smooth coppery tinge of her own blood.

He twisted a knob at the base of the stick and suddenly she couldn't think at all. The stick moved faster, and Hayes was yelling something about SeeD and there was screaming, someone screaming in the background and she wanted to shout at them, to tell them to shut-up and just let her think but she couldn't do anything. The screaming went on and on, Hayes shouting barely overcoming it, until suddenly all of the noise just stopped, cutting out entirely.

Her eyes opened in shock, leaving her to wonder just when they had closed. The stick clattered noisily to the ground. Hayes stood before her, his mouth hanging open and his eyes bulging out in surprise.

Her gaze followed his to where some sort of shiny metal poked through his chest. Anne stared dumbly at the crimson stain radiating across his white shirt. _What a pretty pattern,_ she thought disjointedly. The red was striking against the crisp white silk. Hayes gasped, his breath a wet rattle as he fell to his knees and then to the ground.

Adrian stood where Hayes had previously resided, his mouth set in a grim line as he pulled his rapier out of the dead man, wiping the blade on the back of Hayes' shirt. Anne had never been happier to see him in her life.

Cool blue-green magic surrounded her, burning brightly across her abused senses. The Cure closed the gashes on her belly before passing from her system with a whisper of comfort. She felt like a hollow shell as Adrian cut the ropes binding her and she slumped without the support. He caught her before she could hit the ground.

She cried out as his skin met hers, her overloaded nerves protesting wildly at the stimulation. "I'm sorry, darlin'," Adrian soothed, guiding her awkwardly as he sheathed his weapon. "I don't have time to fix you yet, we have to get out of here. Gavin is holding off the guards at the front gate. I'm not sure if it's with sweet talk or force but either way we've got to book it."

She nodded as he threw his leather trench coat around her and pulled it closed to hide the blood staining the front of her unbuttoned blouse. Her legs felt like gelatin as he guided her toward the door, past the large body of Kyser. Her head felt like mush, but there was something… something Adrian needed to know.

"Drugged me…" she finally managed, albeit weakly. He stopped, pushing her gently against a wall out of range of the cameras. He leaned into her, his hands positioned on either side of her so that he could keep from touching her and setting off more pain.

"They drugged you?" he asked, examining her eyes before reaching up to gently feel the pulse at her throat.

She nodded, happy that he'd understood. "Thoughts… hard, foggy," she clarified, proud when her voice was stronger that time.

"Okay… okay, we've got to get you out of here," he said, mostly to himself. He wrapped his arm around her, wincing at her whimper of pain but ignoring it to expedite his task. They rushed down the hall, Adrian supporting her weight as she put one stumbling foot before the other.

They found no resistance along the way and soon they stepped out into the warm July night. Adrian moved faster then, practically dragging her along as she fought to keep from crying out.

They moved steadily towards the front gate where a man with dark hair and dark blue eyes chatted with two guards. _Gavin__!_ Her heart rejoiced and it was all she could do not to call to him as Adrian shuffled her past and onto the streets of Deling City.

They moved steadily through the brightly lit streets, heading unerringly for the exit where the car rental place was located. It was their fallback 'everything has gone to hell in a hand basket' plan to rent a car, drive to Dollet and call in a utility sub for extraction to Balamb. That they were implementing it meant that Adrian felt the trains wouldn't be safe.

Gavin caught up to them at the entrance and she smiled at him, feeling like her world was now complete. His face was grim and worried, but she could see the stark relief in his eyes and it only served to widen her smile as her heart swelled with her love for him.

Adrian motioned for Gavin to take his place supporting her, and while the exchange was rather painful she couldn't have been happier to be back in his arms. She slumped in his embrace as Adrian left to rent the car.

"I'm so glad you're safe," Gavin whispered into her hair, "I don't think I'd be able to handle it if something happened to you."

She smiled up at him, but couldn't find the words to answer him. Now that she wasn't moving she felt bogged down with exhaustion. She wanted to just curl up in his arms and sleep.

Adrian pulled the rental car to a stop before them. "You can hold onto her for now," he told Gavin as he came to help him get her into the car. "She should be stable enough until we get a reasonable distance away."

Gavin nodded, shuffling her into the backseat before he crawled in next to her. Adrian went back to the driver's seat, put the car into gear and took off.

The lights of the city faded into the background as she curled into Gavin's side. "Good riddance…" she muttered to the last of the buildings fading from view. If she ever saw the city again it would be too soon.

-oooOooo-

**AN: **Thanks to Kimmae!


	13. Chapter 13

**Warning: **Mature-ish themes.

**Chapter Thirteen**

It's half the distance before you leave me behind

_Vaulny Canyon, Timber, July 10, 082 ALC, 07:00 Hours_

She was tired—unbelievably so—but when her watch beeped at seven AM she forced her body up with the same grim determination that had seen her through the week. Sunlight streamed warmly through the partially open flap separating the girls' section from the rest of the tent. The dark green canvas did little to protect her from the chill in the air.

It would be scorching in the canyon by noon, but now she shivered in the chill that hovered between the trees and the jutting rock walls.

As much as she wished for it, the luxury of a heater was beyond her grasp; SeeD didn't abide by heavy travel. On extended missions they were granted one shared tent, a portable burner, and one thin, heavily insulated sleeping bag each. They were mostly expected to forage for both food and water. The camps they set up were meant to be disposable, easily abandoned if the need arose.

When she entered the main portion of the tent she found Quistis and Zell huddled together, speaking in low tones while Tobias listened in. Seifer stood by the three-foot flat rock they'd made into a makeshift counter. Squall's absence was worrisome but expected, he'd been keeping to himself as much as possible over the course of the mission, brooding about the situation.

"Good morning," Quistis greeted.

Nichole mumbled her reply, wishing fervently for some of the harsh, dark coffee she could smell brewing. It was the only luxury they had, and it was due only to the penchant Seifer had for bending the rules to suit himself.

"Wrong side of the bed this morning?" Zell teased, and even as she grumbled her lips twitched up while she plopped down next to him.

Zell had complained of being cold the entire mission—probably due to the short jeans he wore—but his body simply radiated heat, making him the center of the group most mornings. Seifer also had the same uncanny heat production, but he wasn't as good-natured about being 'crowded'.

The first few days of being in close quarters had been hell, but now—besides the occasional awkwardness between Zell and Seifer—you wouldn't have guessed that less than a week ago most of them would have quite happily torn each other's heads off.

After they'd left Balamb, the group had headed for a small village on the canyon's outskirts to gather more information on the caves and what they might find inside. Between the unhelpful citizens and the eggshells her friends were walking on, Nichole had been ready to explode three hours into the mission.

By the second day her temper had easily reached its breaking point. Tobias, Quistis, and Squall were coddling her, for lack of a better word. Treating her like glass that would shatter at the slightest jolt. Even Zell, seeing how the others were acting, had begun to do the same without even knowing why.

That she _was_ actually close to breaking was just too much for her fragile ego to handle.

So when Zell had opened his big mouth and accused her of fraternizing with the enemy—all because she'd started a conversation with Seifer (the only one who didn't treat her like a broken Centra doll), she'd lost it.

She couldn't remember her exact words—something about immaturity and their mission not being of the babysitting variety. The memorable part was when, at the end of it, she'd burst into tears.

Zell and Seifer had looked at each other, and then to her with such abject terror it had almost been enough to send her into hysterical laughter. When they looked back at each other she half expected them to break out in a game of 'rock-paper-scissors' to see who had to deal with the sobbing female.

Instead they'd nodded at each other in some weird male fashion she'd never understand and then both had come over and apologized, like it was their fault she was in such a state. This had, of course, just made her cry harder.

At that point neither of them had known what to do. Zell tried rather awkwardly to comfort her, while Seifer ran for the hills, or at least that's what it had looked like. In reality he'd gone off looking for Tobias.

Meanwhile she was inconsolable, barely coherent, and couldn't have said why she was crying to save her life, which just added to her frustration and her tears. Seifer came back with Tobias and Quistis, having already explained the situation to them.

Tobias had taken one look at her and promptly told everyone else to give her some space. He'd then pulled her into his arms and told her to "let it all out."

"I'm sorry, Nichi, for not being there," he'd said when everyone else had cleared out.

She shook her head, clinging to him as she would a lifeline. "Not your fault," she sobbed out, "I'm sorry they had to call you to come deal with me."

He'd run his hand over her hair. "I know I don't come off as being caring but I do love you, Nichi, and you can always come to me."

She nodded. She knew it was the truth, had always known that he cared for her, but hearing him say it was more comforting than she'd thought it would be.

"I don't even know why I'm crying," she admitted, sniffling, "I-I'm not normally this big of a baby."

Tobias laughed. "No one in their right mind would ever accuse you of being a baby. Everyone needs to let out their emotions now and again."

She smiled at him shakily. "Thanks…" she said, then frowned as she remembered why she'd felt so stressed in the first place. "Do you think you all can lay off on the special treatment now? I'm still the same, and I'm getting pretty sick of being treated like I'm going to have a mental breakdown—this little incident aside."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to treat you any differently, and it wasn't because I was watching for problems. I was just worried about you. It scares me to see you looking so fragile when I know you're not," he explained. "I'll tell Quistis to back off a bit, if you'd like, but I know she's just worried about you as well."

It hadn't taken long after that for the dynamic to return to a somewhat normal state. Quistis and Tobias were inseparable. Nichole expected to hear the announcement that they were dating at any moment. Seifer and Zell seemed to put aside most of their differences, and actually started to work well together.

As for Nichole, after she'd informed Squall of everything she knew about the angels, the towers, and Valora, she had spent most of her time getting re-acquainted with him. It was pretty amazing, all the things her little cousin had done and seen since leaving the orphanage. It was like pulling teeth to get the stories from him and he absolutely refused to talk about Rinoa, but eventually Nichole managed to get a good picture of what things had been like for him.

Seifer bumped her foot with the tip of his boot, interrupting her thoughts, holding a steaming mug of camp coffee out to her. She accepted it with a smile of gratitude, taking her first sip without even flinching at the heat. It burned all the way down and tasted foul, but it served to wake her up.

She scooted closer to Zell, giving Seifer room to sit. Between the two of them and the caffeine, she was beginning to feel vaguely human again, and her thoughts went to Squall.

He was suffering.

The decision he'd been given responsibility of was weighing heavily on his mind. It was a cruel twist of fate to have to decide your love's.

Since Squall refused to talk of Rinoa, Nichole had finally gone to the others of the group. Quistis had filled her in on what she could, as had Zell. Seifer had refused to talk of it at first, but for different reasons than Squall—he hadn't wanted to tell her that he was the villain in most of the story—eventually though, he'd caved. Nichole couldn't quite equate the man she was coming to know with the Seifer of his stories.

Rinoa, Nichole had come to find out, was Squall's light. He'd risked everything to save her on many different occasions. He couldn't be the one to kill her now, it would simply destroy him. Nichole knew it, just as she knew that to even have a chance at saving Rinoa she would have to put herself in harm's way. She could feel the imminence of her death pressing down upon her.

It had been five days and still she was no closer to a plan to escape the coming confrontation alive.

"When you're done we should meet up with Squall. He's been itching to move since five this morning, but we convinced him to hold out until a decent hour," Quistis said.

"You guys could've woken me up," Nichole complained good-naturedly.

"You weren't the only one to want some extra shut-eye, don't worry about it," Tobias added.

Nichole nodded, draining the last of the 'coffee' in one gulp. "Well, let's go then," she said before rising and grabbing her staff from where it leaned against the canvas.

Outside, the air was chilled but rays of warm sunlight were already breaking through the tree canopy. Squall was huddled over a tree stump, where he'd unfolded the crudely-drawn map he'd managed to get from the locals.

"If you'll all gather round," Squall asked, motioning to the parchment. He pointed to the main tunnel.

"We'll break into teams here," he instructed. "According to the map, there are three tunnels that split from there, but all eventually wind back to the main cavern."

He pointed to the cavern. "This is the most likely place for the Sorceress to be. Seifer and I will take the middle tunnel, Quistis and Tobias the east, and Nichole and Zell the west. We'll meet up at the entrances to the main cavern. DO NOT engage the Sorceress until all of the teams are in place. Use the comm devices to keep in touch."

He paused, his hand traveling to the bridge of his nose to stroke his scar. "The order is to capture at this time. If at any point capture becomes impossible, the order is to kill."

Nichole's heart sank into her stomach at the anguish she knew he must be feeling. It was such a heavy burden—heavier even than the possibility that she might not make it out. _It's not fair._ She wanted to shout the words, to scream them, but whining about their situation wouldn't do any good. It wouldn't help Rinoa, and it certainly wouldn't help her.

She fell to the back of the pack as they made their way up the narrow path carved into the rock and Squall and Seifer led them into the dark of the cave. She barely noticed when she and Zell split off from the rest, heading down their assigned tunnel.

A wave of heat met them as they traveled deeper within the rock. Zell kept glancing at her, biting his cheek and then looking away in a somewhat cute, but ultimately annoying attempt to keep from speaking whatever was on his mind.

"If you have something to say, say it," she snapped finally, after the tenth such incidence.

"Nothin' really, just wondering what you were thinking that is making you look so sad. Sorry."

She sighed, smiling slightly. "Just about the situation, the orders," she explained.

"Ah," he said, his face brightening, "don't worry so much 'bout that, we'll find a way. None of us could ever kill Rinoa."

She didn't quite believe him but his attempt to pacify her was sweet, so she smiled at him and they lapsed back into a companionable silence. The tunnel was empty and the small alcoves jutting off of it deserted, so it wasn't long before they came to the cavern entrance.

The heat was practically tangible in the air, creating a haze. She could just barely make out the entrance across from her as Zell stepped back, whispering into the comm device.

She couldn't see the third tunnel, but knew it must have been to her left somewhere along the curving wall. The cavern itself seemed to be empty. A small pool of steaming water spilled out to the right, but otherwise the naturally-carved room was unremarkable.

She wondered if it was a trap. It would be easy for someone to close off the exits now, and while the bottle-neck of the tunnels would work to their advantage for a while, eventually they would wear down.

Her thoughts ended abruptly as fingers clenched over her upper arm. She started, whirling around to find Zell smiling sheepishly as he let go.

"Sorry," he whispered as she relaxed again, "I didn't mean to scare ya. The others are in position. They've got a visual on Rinoa; she's on the wall closest to us. They think she's unconscious. Squall is thinkin' it's a trap so you're stayin' here. Be on the lookout for anything suspicious, but you have orders not to engage."

She nodded silently, cursing Squall and his overprotective tendencies. Still, she would do as she was told… for the moment.

-oooOooo-

Squall's hands trembled with nerves as he made his way to the heart of the heated cavern. Something just didn't feel right.

Rinoa was slumped in the farthest rounded corner, seemingly unconscious. When he'd first seen her like that all of the breath had left him; he'd feared she was dead. It had been pure torture until he noticed the subtle rise and fall of her torso. A kind of draining relief had taken over then, but behind it had come a waterfall of questions. _Was she still a pawn? Why was she here of all places, out in the middle of nowhere? _

He bent down cautiously as he reached her, jumping back when she moved slightly. She lifted her head, smiling at him, and it took all of his willpower to keep from pulling her into his arms—to remind himself that things weren't always what they seemed.

"I knew you'd come for me," Rinoa said, rising to her feet. "She had her doubts, but I knew better."

"She who, Rinoa?" he asked.

They'd said that she was possessed—like Edea had been—but Edea had had little knowledge of her own actions during that time. She'd described it as a nightmare, trapped in her own mind, only receiving snippets of what her body was doing.

"My angel," Rinoa said simply, confusion prominent on her delicate features. "She said you wouldn't come for me like I wanted you to…" Her eyes grew suspicious as she looked past him to the other tunnels where the rest of the team waited. "She was right, wasn't she? You didn't come for me, you came for your duty. I'm just another '_mission_' to you," she spat.

"No!" he exclaimed. "You will never be just another mission to me, you haven't been since I joined you on the outskirts of that stage in Fisherman's Horizon. I have to take you back to Balamb Garden though, 'Noa. You hurt a lot of people."

She shook her head. "I'm not going back to Garden, to be the outsider, the ignored, again. I like it just fine right here. If you don't want to stay with me, well… _whatever_, but I've promised and I keep my promises, even if you don't."

_What promises_? he wondered. What could she have promised that would keep her away from him? She hung her head, avoiding his searching gaze as the rock beside her shimmered and then partially disappeared.

There was a woman there, fused into the wall, looking as if she'd been carved from it. She was beautiful, breathtakingly so, with naked curves to tempt any hot-blooded male. But her green eyes held such malice, such insanity that it ruined the image entirely.

"So, the lion has returned… and he brought friends." Her voice was a husky rasp, one that he recognized as the voice Rinoa had spoken with before her flight from the Quad.

_So this must be Valora_, he thought, reanalyzing her while praying that Nichole had followed orders and stayed hidden.

"Let Rinoa go," he demanded, inching his way closer to his love.

"I don't think so, little lion. Rinoa is happy where she is. She's appreciated here. She isn't cast off, abandoned in a world that fears her. She agreed to help me in return for my protection." The wicked smile echoing in her eyes chilled him and he tore his away, looking to Rinoa.

"What is she talking about?" he asked her.

Rinoa shook her head, tears in her eyes. "Garden was never my home, Squall. You left me, you said you'd never leave me and so I followed you to your home, but you just left me. They hate me, they all hate the Sorceress! And this… this chain—" She tore at the Bangle around her wrist, leaving marks on her skin in her efforts to move the bracelet that wouldn't budge. "—this shackle didn't do anything but give them an easier target." Her eyes narrowed. "You swore you'd protect me; that you'd be my knight, but when I needed you, you weren't there. My angel was. She has kept me safe. Kept me from being lost in the world of hate. I-I don't remember how I got here, but I know that she's kept her promise. Can you say the same?"

Squall felt blindsided, why hadn't she told him any of this. If he'd known she felt ostracized in Garden he would have seen to it that things changed. He knew he'd been busy with work, but he'd thought Rinoa understood. Had he broken his promise to protect her? Or was this just more of Valora's lies? Quistis, Zell, Selphie, any one of them would report to him if they thought Rinoa wasn't well received in Garden.

"What about the attack on Nichole? On us?" Quistis asked from behind him.

Rinoa's eyes snapped to them. "On who?"

"The red-headed girl," Zell clarified.

Rinoa shook her head. "That wasn't a dream? I-It felt like a dream, I dreamt I was losing you," —her eyes sought Squall's— "you were turning away from me. I saw you hugging that girl and telling her how much you'd missed her, and then I don't remember. You were yelling at me, telling me I was a bitch, to get out of your room. I had to talk to you, to get you back and you shut me out again. Then I saw her in the Quad, that girl, and I just… blacked out. I think I called her a whore, I don't even know why, it wasn't her fault, not her fault I couldn't keep you. Bits and pieces are all I know after that. I was thrown by something—something the girl did and my angel saved me. She saved me…"

It was worse than he thought, and all of his idiotic actions were coming back to bite him with a vengeance. He couldn't deny what she'd said, except for one thing. "You weren't losing me."

"Hahaha, that's rich," Valora said. "You deny it?"

"Stay out of it," he ordered tersely. "My orders have nothing to do you with, unless you interfere?"

"_Interfere_!? It is you who has interfered. Where is the girl?"

He shrugged. "What girl?"

"Do not lie to me, little lion. I know she is with you. I was assured that she would be on this mission."

_Assured…_well, that explained why he couldn't get the order rescinded. How high up the chain did it originate?

"Do not ignore me!" Valora screeched. "Where is the girl?"

"I don't know…"

"Liar!" she spat, her eyes sparkling with madness. "I shall show you what happens to those who lie."

One moment he was standing before her, the next he was on the floor, writhing in agony, his skin burning from the inside out. After an initial scream of surprise he grit his teeth, refusing to give her the satisfaction of hearing his pain. He couldn't see anything through his own tears, but he could hear the outraged cries of his teammates—and closer, the desperate pleading of Rinoa. "Please… Please stop. Why are you doing this?!"

Valora ignored her. "Where is the girl?" she demanded.

"Stop it." The crystal clear voice rang out across the cavern.

The pain stopped as abruptly as it had begun, leaving him drawing in harsh ragged breaths and blinking to clear his vision. Rinoa was at his side, cradling his head in her lap.

"Ah, so at last the jezebel arrives," Valora said.

Rinoa looked between Squall and Nichole in a mixture of pain and worry and Squall cursed his cousin's stupidity. He'd told her to stay put for a reason, he wanted her safe, yes, but he also hadn't wanted Rinoa to be confronted with her until he'd explained everything.

"I see," Rinoa said, soullessly. "I really have been replaced, then. I'm sorry." She moved to pull away.

Desperately Squall followed her, standing and blocking her path. "Wait, you've got it wrong," he said.

"I didn't replace anyone," Nichole spoke up. "Squall is my cousin, I hadn't seen him since we both left the orphanage. I would never try to take him from you, Rinoa. You're the best thing that's ever happened to him."

Rinoa shook her head in denial, but Squall could tell she was listening. "I tried to tell you, that day you came to talk to me, but you couldn't hear me," he added.

"Lies!" Valora screeched. "They stand there and lie to your face, you saw them together, you know the truth."

"She's the liar. She's been feeding you nothing but lies. She stole your body, and used you to hurt Quistis and Zell, Tobias and Nichole. I know you wouldn't hurt anyone like that." Squall pleaded, "I'm telling the truth, and you know in your heart I wouldn't lie to you. I tried to tell you so many times. I love you."

He touched her, sighing in relief when she collapsed into his arms. He crushed her to him, vowing to never let her go again.

"How touching…" Valora cooed, "the Sorceress and the lion together again… Enjoy it while it lasts."

Her words sent chills down Squall's spine. He shoved Rinoa behind him, putting himself between her and the demented angel. He backed up slowly, edging towards the far side of the cavern, where Rinoa would be safe.

Tobias and Quistis had closed ranks in front of Nichole, guiding her back towards their entrance while Zell and Seifer stood to either side of them. The blow they were all expecting, however, never came.

Valora just seemed to disappear, the rock where she'd been was solid once more. Rinoa, who'd been clinging to Squall's arm, suddenly went stiff.

"Oh shit!" Zell yelled, seeing the impending danger but unable to stop it.

It was the only warning Squall received before he was flung bodily across the cavern, hitting the wall with a thud that seemed to echo in the space before he fell to the ground, unmoving.

"No!" Nichole yelled, fighting against Tobias and Quistis, trying to reach him.

Seifer drew Hyperion, pointing it at Rinoa while Zell rushed over to Squall and felt for a pulse. "He's alive," he called back, already scanning him for damage.

Nichole ceased struggling immediately, allowing Quistis to guide her further away from Rinoa while Tobias placed himself between them.

Meanwhile, Rinoa was where she began, in the center of the cavern, her eyes closed. Her eyes opened, and the brown orbs were dull and lifeless as they surveyed the room.

Seifer sneered. "You always were so damn weak. Fight her, Rinoa."

Valora's voice came from the Sorceress. "It's too late, little knight."

Seifer cast Firaga at the witch, crossing in mid-air with Rinoa's Blizzaga. The spell encased Seifer but the fire bounced off of Rinoa's Reflect and melted the ice, leaving Seifer somewhat stunned, but mostly unharmed.

"You'll have to do better than that, little knight," Valora taunted.

Tobias cast Reflect on himself before using a Dispel to remove Rinoa's protection as Quistis—still blocking Nichole—cast a Cure at Seifer to speed along his recovery.

Seifer and Tobias charged in tandem but were knocked back by a wave of Water. Rinoa smiled while tendrils of magic wisped up from her outstretched hand, forming into three wickedly sharp spears of ice that she sent flying at Nichole. Nichole dodged and two shards shattered against the cavern wall but Quistis wasn't as quick.

The shard pierced her abdomen and she screamed. Falling to her knees, she clutched futilely at the projectile. Tobias yelled, charging the Sorceress, his joined blade raised over his shoulder while his rage tore open the link binding him to his twin.

Nichole grit her teeth against the assault—reminding herself over and over that it wasn't she who was angry—and cast Curaga on Quistis. The magic didn't respond to her attempts to guide it and she noted that it did little for the wound—only slightly stemming the flow of blood.

She caught movement out of the corner of her eye, and watched with divided attention as Tobias was tossed back by a burst of magic. Unfazed, he picked himself up, separating his sword into two parts before charging in again.

Nichole cast another Curaga at Quistis' wound. The blood that had been steadily dripping from it slowed to a trickle, giving Nichole hope that she could fix it—if she could just get the shard out. It hadn't traveled very far, maybe six inches in before its momentum gave out, and it was low enough that it shouldn't have pierced through any vital organs.

"I'm going to have to remove it before I can heal you," Nichole explained gently, her fingertips hovering over the magic-infused ice.

Quistis nodded slightly, her blue eyes clouded with pain. "Just do it," she gasped.

Nichole grabbed hold of the shard at its thickest part, readying the spell she wanted in her mind before giving it a mighty tug. Quistis cried out as the shard came free and Nichole cast her last Curaga, trying vainly to guide it to the wound.

Nichole's head pounded from the effort of trying to contain the magic and she held it gingerly, watching with relief as the blood flow stopped altogether and Quistis' insides melded back into their original form.

Tobias and Seifer were dodging spells and landing glancing blows seemingly with ease. Nichole watched their dance for a moment, looking for an opening where her spells wouldn't disrupt their flow.

There. She cast Fire just as Seifer stepped back from Rinoa. It missed, glancing off Rinoa's Shell before hitting the wall. Tobias spun mid charge, bringing his twin blades down in an arc and slicing Rinoa's arm open. Rinoa screeched, throwing him back with a burst of power.

Seifer took the moment of surprise, charging in and casting a Firaga, followed by the arc of his gunblade. The spell was deflected but the sword carved another line in Rinoa's shoulder and the bullet that followed pierced through bone. Rinoa screamed in fury and pain and Seifer retreated quickly, avoiding the magic that had thrown Tobias.

Quistis rushed to Tobias's side, checking him for injuries. Nichole felt his relief, his love at the sight of her and worked desperately to close the link. Tobias glanced at her, and shook his head slightly, smiling.

"That almost hurt," Valora sneered, glancing dispassionately at Rinoa's wounds. Seconds later nothing but the red stain of blood remained as her Curaga did its work.

Tobias charged again, Seifer right behind him in a calculated maneuver as Nichole readied another spell—Thundara. Quistis struck out with her whip, wrapping the spiked chain around the distracted Sorceress—holding her in place so that the others could strike true.

"Enough!" Valora screeched.

Nichole was frozen, the tingling energy of her spell crackling along her fingertips. She couldn't move, couldn't speak, and she realized then that Valora had merely been toying with them. Rinoa had used this magic on Nichole before, simply to play with her before attempting to kill her at her leisure. Nichole had escaped then, but didn't hold out hope to do so again.

Tobias had frozen mid-strike and Rinoa knocked his prone form aside, sending him flying into the stone wall behind her. Quistis' whip sunk uselessly at the Sorceress' feet and Rinoa simply stepped over the limp chain, heading for Seifer.

"It's too bad, little knight. I did so enjoy our time together, you made such an interesting toy." Valora grinned maliciously, before sending him flying in the opposite direction, behind Nichole.

Nichole struggled wildly, trying desperately to call up the power that had flowed so readily into her in the Balamb Hotel. The spell holding her seemed to give just a bit with her effort and so she increased it, focusing all of her will on making her arm move.

It felt like she was trying to push a brick wall, but she began to see a difference as her muscles twitched and Rinoa's face creased with the effort of holding the magic. Nichole tried harder to tap into the power, the tower that was hers, but it wouldn't come. It was so frustrating, knowing that she had the strength to end this battle, if only she could find it.

She struggled on, feeling more and more worthless, but then the spell gave. It was just a tiny fraction but it was enough. Nichole focused, using the energy of the spell still crackling on her outstretched hand to feed her effort.

Rinoa cried out as the spell broke and the energy back-lashed, releasing everyone. Nichole's Thundara flew from her fingertips, catching the already gasping Sorceress full-force.

Rinoa screamed, but recovered quickly, and Nichole gasped soundlessly as she was caught once more in the energy of the stasis spell. Nichole's eyes swiveled to Quistis who was already winding her way to where Tobias lay.

She was alone. Nichole knew then, without a doubt, that she was going to die. She would never escape from Rinoa's grasp, not when the Sorceress' focus was solely on her.

As the smoky tendrils of ice hovered over Rinoa's hand, Nichole cried out silently in terror. The world would fall because she wasn't strong enough to stop it, because she had failed at drawing on the power given to her.

Rinoa's face twisted into an evil smile as she sent the fully formed shards hurtling across the expanse.

All of a sudden Squall was in front of her, coming out of nowhere to leap in front of the oncoming projectiles. Pain exploded across Nichole's senses as the first shard hit—she couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything as the second pierced through Squall's shoulder.

"NO!" Rinoa screamed, as the largest shard, the one meant for Nichole's heart, stopped mid-air in front of Squall.

Nichole couldn't tell if it had entered his chest; she could barely even see past his shoulder as he stood in front of her. Squall sunk to his knees, in pain or relief, Nichole couldn't tell, but she could see then that the shard had just barely nicked him.

Tears streamed down Rinoa's cheeks as she held back the magic by pure will alone. "I'm so sorry, Squall… I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

The third shard wavered in the air, drawing a line of blood across Squall's white undershirt. "NO. I won't do it!" Rinoa yelled in answer to some unspoken command. "I won't be controlled anymore. Not by you… not by anyone…" Her voice held such anger, but underneath was a type of resignation that chilled Nichole to the bone.

_No! _Nichole tried to scream, but nothing came out.

"I won't… I love you, Squall." Rinoa cried, closing her eyes and with a gesture pulled the magic back. The shard followed, flying straight and true, stabbing her through the heart.

"Rinoa!" Squall yelled, running to her, chasing the ice, arriving too late. He caught her as she fell, casting spell after spell on her, trying desperately to heal the damage but nothing worked—the shard remained resolutely in her chest.

Nichole watched in horror, screaming in her mind and then aloud as the magic holding her broke. With a grim desperation she pulled all of her magic, all of the energy she had, pouring it into the only spell that she could think of—Full-Life.

The bright white light surrounded Rinoa, but Nichole knew—even as Heaven's feather floated down—that the magic would not work. She was too late, Rinoa was already dead. Helplessness overwhelmed her as Squall rocked Rinoa's pale form, demanding that she come back to him.

Nichole turned away, unable to bear the sight of his grief, tears clouding her vision. Zell appeared beside her, his own tears running unheeded down his cheeks as he held back an equally tearful and struggling Seifer.

Nichole watched silently, feeling like the scum of the earth as Seifer gave up, dropping to his knees where he put his head in his hands and wept.

She tore her eyes away, searching for Quistis, for Tobias—who she prayed was okay. She found them together, Tobias staring resolutely at the cavern floor while Quistis cried into his shoulder.

Everything else was forgotten as the last of the adrenaline drained from Nichole's system, leaving her gasping in pain. The shard, which she had assumed would melt away with the Sorceress' death, was still embedded between her shoulder blade and her clavicle. It had missed her lungs by millimeters, traveling all the way through her chest to emerge between the bones of her back. Still, she was sure that if she could just yank the thing out she'd be fine.

Theory and execution are often two very separate things.

In the end she almost drove herself to unconsciousness before the shard came free with a sickening slurp, leaving a gaping hole that refused to be healed by her Curas. The spells took the edge off the pain, though, for which she was grateful. She had forgotten the first aid kit back at the camp so she was forced to make do—stuffing the wound with strips torn off her cotton undershirt. If it was between an infection and bleeding to death, she'd just have to deal with the former. With her wound no longer threatening her life, and the pain dulled by yet another Cura, the sounds of mourning finally pierced through her haze.

Guilt rested squarely on Nichole's shoulders—while Rinoa wasn't Nichole's friend, she deserved better than she got. Squall deserved better. Squall who sat, looking lost and clutching Rinoa to his chest like one would a child. Pushing her self-pity and grief aside, she went to him, kneeling gently next to Rinoa. Squall didn't even seem to notice. Didn't even look up, didn't acknowledge her until she covered his blood-stained glove with her equally red fingers.

"Why?" he whispered brokenly, looking up at her with haunted, tear-rimmed eyes.

Her heart wrenched for him. It should have been her. She should have been the one lying there, not Rinoa. "I don't know…" she admitted, "there is no reason for this, not for this… Not for any of it."

His eyes traveled to the girl he held. "She's already getting cold."

Nichole nodded, feeling entirely inept. It was such a waste, she thought, brushing a stray hair off of Rinoa's pale porcelain cheek.

A spark of energy passed from the girl's skin to hers, and for one breathless moment Nichole wondered if they had been mistaken, if Rinoa still lived. A bluish-white light spilled from the Sorceress' every pore, gathering into a sphere above her forehead. It was beautiful, ethereal and brilliant as it rose until it was level with Nichole's face.

"I need to move on…" Rinoa's voice called, sounding like she was already in a far off place.

Nichole stared at the light, wondering if she was seeing things, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from it, couldn't move, couldn't call out.

"I need to move on," Rinoa repeated, "will you accept the burden?" The light shimmered as Nichole nodded, not knowing what she was agreeing to, but willing to do anything for the woman who had sacrificed herself; the woman her cousin loved.

A profound sense of peace washed over Nichole while memories—those of Rinoa and those of the ones that came before her—poured into her. As the images slowed the feelings of peace dispersed entirely, replaced by a pain that she'd never felt the likes of before.

The burden. This was the burden—she knew inexplicably—as the pain stole from her everything that she was. She couldn't scream, couldn't writhe—there was no relief as Hyne's gift and curse flowed into her, filling her, twisting her very soul. She was losing herself under the weight of the power and the memories not her own, but could only sit, frozen, praying for it to end.

Finally the flow lessened bit by bit, and she was able to focus, to find herself amongst the memories. The pain trickled down into nothing as she shoved them back, instinctively putting them and her power away until she could afford to examine them more closely.

The light dimmed. "I'm so sorry," Rinoa said.

Nichole shook her head; she had accepted the burden, it wasn't Rinoa's fault. The lingering bits of memory afforded her the right words to say, "Be at peace Rinoa, child of Hyne, may you walk always with the Mother's grace."

The light faded entirely, leaving Nichole with a feeling of loss more intense than she'd ever encountered. "She loved you so much, Squall," she choked out.

He looked up at her, startled, then shook it off, gazing back down at the empty shell of Rinoa's body. "I know… I loved her…" His voice cracked and he cleared his throat.

"She knew," Nichole said, hoping that it was the right thing.

Squall sighed. "We need to get back to Garden. She deserves to be buried with honors."

"We'll get you fixed and then we'll see to her." She grabbed the shard in his shoulder, ignoring the pain in her own—it was nothing compared to the burden. She pulled it out in one swift move, already casting Cura.

Her stock of spells was seriously depleted, she noticed, as she cast yet another on him when the first did nothing. The hole in his shoulder was smaller than hers but proved just as difficult to heal, so rather than wasting the few spells she had left, she gave up, ripping yet more cloth from her shirt and stuffing it into his wound. He flinched as she tended to him but didn't speak.

Feeling rather exposed with her midriff bared, she went to where she'd dropped her leather, taking note of the others along the way. Seifer was still kneeling, gazing sadly at Rinoa. Zell was leaning against the cavern wall behind him. Pulling on her tank top—and wincing at the four inch tear in the leather—she turned to where Quistis and Tobias had been.

They were mostly as she'd left them. Quistis was no longer crying, but they still sat wrapped up in each other, and the woman behind them…

_Holy shit! _Nichole did a double-take—they'd forgotten all about Valora.

"Tobias, move NOW!" she screamed, gesturing wildly at him, her eyes riveted to the woman in the wall.

"Yes… Run, little lovers…" Valora croaked, sounding very much worse for wear.

Tobias, finally realizing the danger, was up and shoving Quistis behind him all in one smooth motion. Quistis scrambled for purchase as he set her down, almost falling over as she tugged Tobias backwards away from the witch.

"Such fools…" Valora sneered at them. "I have no time for this," she said, her gaze falling to where Squall sat clutching Rinoa. They all watched in horrified shock as Rinoa's body rose into the air.

Valora smiled cruelly, "You thought you'd won, my little Sorceress… Oh, how wrong you were." Rinoa came to a stop before the angel, tilting forward until their foreheads touched in a weird display.

"It can't be!" Valora screamed, after a few seconds of contact. "You little witch!" she cried, flinging Rinoa's body from her.

"No!" Nichole cried, reaching out, not knowing what she could do, but knowing that somehow, someway, she had to stop it.

To her surprise Rinoa's flight halted, stopping mid-air as the body slumped, hanging there like a rag-doll. Nichole looked at her hand in shock—had she done that?

As soon as her focus diverted the body shook, wavering. Terrified and yet somewhat thrilled, Nichole put all of her will into guiding Rinoa gently to the ground as Squall scrambled over to her.

"YOU!" Valora's scream was almost inaudible. "Decades stuck in this infernal cavern… all of my beautiful plans, all of my work _wasted_ and it's always, _always_ back to YOU!" she raged. "_All of that time_, working to get enough of Hyne's power into one shell, and with one fell swoop, _you ruin it_!"

Valora shook her head, her dark hair flowing out wildly as power gathered around her, crackling with a red-black light. "Fine! So be it! I'll just kill you and have everything I've worked for all in one package!"

Squall stood, placing himself between Nichole and the angel. Tobias and Quistis had used the distraction to move around to the group and they joined their leader, flanking him on either side while Zell and Seifer hovered behind her. Nichole turned slightly to look at them and that was when she noticed it.

A streak of gray amongst the rock… Griever… it couldn't be… He bounded towards them, all two-hundred plus pounds of him, skidding to a stop before Squall. Stretching his neck up, his nose just barely touched the silver pendant hanging from Squall's neck.

Brilliant lavender light flooded the cavern, radiating out until they were all forced to shield their eyes from its blinding effect as a wave of energy slammed into them, leaving them breathless.

When Nichole was able to look again, she gasped. Standing where her cat had been was a Guardian, one she'd never seen before. Part lion, part man, he stood over twelve feet tall. Deep purplish-gray fur covered him, interrupted by deep crimson markings and two wicked looking crimson blades that were merged into his forearms. A silver white mane surrounded his feline looking head. Five red horns jutted out of the top of his skull, curling around to where two feathery wings emerged from between his shoulder blades.

She stood in awe as he turned towards her, his gray eyes the only thing that she recognized. "Forgive me," he said, his voice a deep rumble.

She nodded, unsure of what he was speaking, as he turned to the witch in the wall. "You have caused enough harm this day, Valora. It ends now."

Valora shook her head, shock and rage morphing her features. "Griever… what an _unpleasant _surprise. I didn't expect to find you here of all places."

Griever just laughed, casting Meltdown on her without pause, and smiling carnivorously when her defensive spells fell. He followed with a barrage of spells at an alarming speed giving Valora no time to cast or recover. She jerked and twitched against her stone prison, her screams echoing around the cavern. Finally Griever paused, breathing heavily.

Valora cackled. "Tired already, Dearheart... Such a shame, you used to have so much more... stamina."

Griever roared, casting Blizzaga at the witch but she deflected it easily, casting Quake. The cavern shook, groaning as the magic tore through the stone. Griever flew above the spell, avoiding it easily, but the rest of them weren't so lucky.

Nichole threw herself over the slumped form of Squall—unconscious from whatever method Griever had used to change his form—shielding him from the rocks raining down from the unsteady ceiling while the rest did their best to find cover. By the time the Quake was through Nichole was bruised and somewhat bloody but otherwise unharmed.

She got back to her feet just as Griever landed with a roar that shook the very walls. "This ends now! Shockwave Pulsar!"

Valora's scream echoed as a brilliant white light surrounded her, tearing her from her rocky outcropping and shooting her up to the roof of the cavern. A black hole formed at the center, sucking in everything with such power that Nichole had to crouch down, bracing Squall against the pull.

Suddenly the pull reversed, the energy exploding outwards, blinding all of Nichole's senses momentarily before diminishing back into nothing.

Valora was left, naked, broken, and bleeding on the cavern floor. She screamed in pain and fury, then gasped, looking down at her hands before smiling shakily. "You've made this so much easier, Dearheart," she rasped, "I'm so glad you came."

Griever roared, readying his attack once more but before he could cast it, she was gone. Only the blood on the stone remained.

"Is she gone?" Zell asked from behind Nichole.

"She has gone to lick her wounds, she won't be back today… but she will be back," Griever growled out.

Nichole stood, dumbfounded until Tobias tugged on her hand. "Come, Nichii; let's get Squall and the rest out of here," he said.

"What about Griever?" she whispered, noting that Zell and Seifer were staring at the Guardian with a mixture of wariness and shock.

"I don't know. Ask him what he wants, I guess. I'll herd the rest of them out, we'll have to come up with something to tell them though. I mean, your cat just turned into... that..." he whispered back, gesturing to the twelve foot creature hovering where Valora had been.

She nodded and whispered, "Tell them that he's a new GF, and he's chosen me to junction to, or that he didn't want to stay. Hopefully they won't care past that with everything else." She gestured slightly to Squall's unconscious form and Rinoa's body.

Tobias nodded slightly and turned casting Float first on Squall and then on Rinoa's body. "Zell, can you and Seifer take Rinoa?" he asked, before they could say anything. "The spell should hold until we get out, but if it breaks I don't want her to fall. Nichole's going to see if the GF planned to join us."

Zell nodded, taking position at the floating girl's feet, while Seifer took point at her head and they guided her out.

Tobias followed them with Squall, guiding him around the rocks with Quistis' help. Nichole waited until they had cleared the tunnel entrance before she turned back to Griever.

Griever stopped her before she could ask him anything. "I want to thank you, mistress, for saving me all those years ago. I know you have questions, and I will try to answer everything I can in the time I'm allotted."

"You aren't going to stay?" she asked—the first question that popped into her mind.

"No," he grumbled, "the tower calls me, pulls me to its source. My power is the key to the aspect's full power in this world, and now that I am whole again, I won't be able to fight his summon for long."

"Oh… well… does that mean that you'll be under Valora's influence then?"

"Not entirely," he replied. "Unless she gains direct control over the tower, I will be able to ignore her. You, however, I will always answer. If your need is strong enough I will come."

"Why were you out on that cliff?" she asked abruptly.

"I was searching, both for my power and for you, but a kitten's senses aren't all that keen and so I stumbled. When Valora cast me from the tower she bound me into the mortal form I resembled the most, a wild cat. She wanted me to die in that helplessly weak form, but what she didn't understand, what she couldn't have known, is that the Twelve Aspect Guardians cannot truly die.

"So while my mortal form perished, I was always reborn. Destiny guided you to me that day, just as she guided you in bestowing my trinket to her chosen, so that he might be recognized by my children and be given their favor. The rest of my tale you already know."

Nichole gasped. _but that meant…_"I found your trinket—the necklace—on the Centra beach. I gave it to Squall... is he Destiny's chosen? And how did he come up with your name?"

"As to my name; my power was locked inside the trinket he wore, it gave him the knowledge of me, of my true form. You were separated from him before my mortal form was old enough to handle the change and so I was stuck. As to Destiny's chosen, yes, Squall has become the fated one. Destiny is the true Guardian of humanity; when the need is great enough she can choose a child of Hyne to be her vessel. Squall has already saved us all from Chaos. My children, and the children of the other Guardians were needed on his quest, and so Destiny supplied her chosen with the means to attract them. Power begets power; it is the truth of all things."

"Is that why the Guardians are starting to disappear, the need for them is gone?" Nichole asked.

"No, not entirely. The need on Gaea is waning, this is true, but the need for power on the High Plane has grown to such a degree that the children are being called to it, to the towers of their heritage. It was never in the design—the Twelve's children were deemed as inferior, rabble half-breeds at best, created by our joining with humans and monsters—but the need outweighs everything else.

"Valora did herself no favor when she broke my bond with the tower, the angels have never understood the Guardian's role. I am the tower's Power, the mediation between magic and knowledge. Eris, the other Guardian, is my mate, my other half, and without the two of us working together, the aspect itself is greatly weakened. Had Valora known the extent of our ties, I doubt she would have acted as she did."

"How did she do it—bind you, I mean?" Nichole asked.

"I can't be sure—but most likely with help from Eris. Valora has a great deal of will and power, but even so, to usurp the aspect's hold—well… she would need some help. Eris and I were of two minds of Valora. I did not trust her, could see her being the end of us all, but my Eris, she only sees strength where I see madness. She would know that I cannot die, and thus binding me to a mortal form would be a fitting punishment for my disloyalty. Or perhaps it was a test. Eris is sharp, she could have designed it all simply to limit Valora's power while determining if I was right."

Nichole frowned. "Either way, it seems rather harsh."

Griever laughed, a rumbling sound. "Yes... dying hurts, and being reborn is disorienting, but we are harsh creatures. Eris will get her comeuppance... she will never live down being wrong."

Nichole shook her head, then changed the subject as another question popped into her head. "How do I tap into the power of the tower? I tried while Rinoa—Valora—had me in her spell but I couldn't find it."

Griever smiled. "There is no way to 'tap into' Chaos—as you say. The power is already yours, it simply waits for you to command it. It already feeds off your strongest emotions, but to control it your will must be strong, stronger than its own, or it will simply choose to follow its nature and ignore your command—or surprise you entirely and heed it. Unpredictability is the key. When forcing your will upon the magic you must learn to never second-guess, never show any doubt. You are strong, you are stubborn, and you are in control."

"That's a lot harder than you make it sound," Nichole said.

Griever's laugh rumbled out across the cavern. "I'm sure, but I'm also sure that you can manage. Was there anything else you wanted to know? The call is becoming demanding."

She shook her head, there were dozens upon dozens of questions she could think of but not one of them was worth his obvious discomfort.

"Valora has been weakened, she is near death now. If you can reach her before she regains her strength you'll have a better chance of defeating her. Keep what I've told you in mind and you'll have no trouble using Chaos' might. Farewell for now, little mistress, I will be waiting for your call."

She smiled lightly at him before a more demure version of the same lavender colored light enveloped him, removing him from the cavern.

-oooOooo-

**AN**: Thanks to **Kimmae** for all her help.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

It's such a waste of time…

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, July 15, 082 ALC, 09:00 Hours_

The blue hull of Balamb garden gleamed brightly, shining like the sun; a beacon of hope, shedding its light on the otherwise dreary day. Nichole couldn't have been more thankful for the sight as it grew steadily larger out of the port side window of the Ragnarok. Her nightmare was almost at an end.

After the smoke had cleared and Squall had awoken from his unnatural slumber, their group had little choice but to hike out of the canyon the way they had come in. It had been three long, hot days as Tobias, Quistis, and she had toiled, keeping Rinoa's body moving and preserved while the others had taken care of the countless monsters looking for an easy meal.

Quistis had been the one to think of modifying the Blizzard spell to suit their need to preserve Rinoa's body—lessening the damaging effects of the spell while keeping the freezing ones. She had tried to teach it to all of them, but only Nichole and Tobias had any success with it. So the three of them had taken turns maintaining the magic surrounding the Sorceress. Nichole had gotten the day in the middle and by the end of it she had wanted to fall asleep and never wake again.

It had been grueling to say the least, made even more so by the hole in her shoulder that refused to heal. When she'd first gotten out of the cavern she hadn't had the time or the thought to do any more than pull the t-shirt material out and replace it with sterile bandages. She didn't think to have anyone else look at it, and before she knew it, the wound had become infected. By the end of day two, between the fever and the magical fatigue, she hadn't known which way was up.

The two days she hadn't been on duty, she'd spent every moment she could with Squall. She'd had to bully him into eating, coax him into sleeping, force him into taking the antibiotics Tobias carried—she couldn't heal his wound any better than she could her own—and generally watch him like a hawk. All while trying her best to both comfort him and allow him the time and space to grieve.

She felt like an overworked nursemaid, but couldn't begrudge him his sorrow, or assuage her own guilt. If he hadn't stepped in front of the attack meant for her, Rinoa never would have turned it upon herself. It was her fault Rinoa was dead, and in her darkest hours she wondered if Squall regretted his choice to save her.

She barely felt the jolt as the Ragnarok landed in Balamb's hanger. The fever was burning her again, clouding her thoughts until they became a jumbled mess.

She followed the others out of the cockpit and into the hatch, leaving Squall seated. Quistis had informed her earlier that Squall didn't need to be present for the debriefing and that she would do her best to see to it that he got a few weeks of leave.

Zell released the lock, and with a mechanical grinding sound, the ramp lowered onto Garden's deck.

Headmaster Cid was waiting for them, a short-haired brunette woman in SeeD regalia by his side. "Welcome back," he greeted as they all saluted wearily. "At ease—" He looked up and down the line. "—where's Squall?"

Quistis stepped forward, taking up her position as ranking officer in his absence. "Inside, sir. He's resting. He respectfully requests a leave of duty."

Cid shook his head, his brow creasing with concern. "I can't grant that request at the moment, there is too much going on to lose any of the command at this point."

Quistis started to protest but Cid cut her off with a look not often seen on the cheerful man's face. "Report the status of the mission, Assistant Commander."

Quistis' posture was stiff, her tone short and clipped but she did as she was told. "Mission successful, sir. Sorceress Rinoa Heartilly is dead."

Cid closed his eyes, as the brunette beside him gasped out, "So that's why…"

"Continue the report, please," Cid requested, ignoring the woman's outburst.

"It was as we thought," Quistis explained. "Sorceress Heartilly was being controlled by an outside force. The main target was SeeD Nichole Skye, reason unknown. SeeD Commander Leonhart intercepted an attack meant to kill SeeD Skye and was injured in the process. Sorceress Heartilly stopped the attack from killing him, using it instead to take her own life, ending the entity's hold on her. The entity attacked, but with the help of an unknown Guardian, was injured and fled. That is all, sir."

"Noted. I expect everyone's full report on my desk no later than 18:00 hours tomorrow."

"Most of them have already been prepared," Quistis started. Nichole tuned the rest out.

Sweat dripped down the back of her neck, but her body shivered with cold as she stood waiting to be dismissed. She was so tired… but she couldn't sleep. Her obligation to Squall wasn't over. She had to see him to his room as she'd promised before she could even think about her own bed. She just needed to get through this briefing. Another hour wasn't going to kill her… if only they would hurry up!

Cid finally finished with Quistis and turned to the rest of the group. "I'm sorry for keeping you all this long. I know you must be tired; please take the rest of the day to recover. Any injuries should be checked by the Infirmary by the end of the day. You are dismissed."

_Finally!_ she rejoiced, watching the others file off. "Headmaster Cid, about Rinoa?" she asked.

Cid turned, looking at her with some surprise. "Yes, something must be done," he agreed, his eyes sad and distant.

"We kept her preserved during the trip back… her body is in the airlock. Commander Leonhart respectfully requests that we hold a service for her," she said, mimicking Quistis' earlier words. "She died defending the Commander of SeeD, she deserves full honors."

"Yes… yes," Cid agreed absently, "that can be arranged… Xu?"

The brunette—Xu—nodded. "Yes, sir, I'll start the arrangements immediately—" She paused briefly before adding, "—Shall I notify next of kin?"

"Hmm? Oh, yes, do that. Let him know about the ceremony too. Be kind, Xu, he's not going to take the news well."

Xu nodded again, saluted, and left.

"Thank you, sir," Nichole added, throwing her own weary salute before leaving him to his thoughts.

The interior was brightly lit as she stepped back into the hull. She found Squall exactly as she'd left him, slumped over in his seat, head in hands.

She touched the back of his hand lightly and he looked up at her with a heartbreaking sadness. He took her offered hand after a second's pause and she led him out of the ship and into the hanger.

In the corridor connecting the hanger with the main hall, he stopped. "Rinoa?" he asked quietly—the first time he'd spoken that day.

"She'll be taken care of," she reassured him, pulling him back into walking. She was losing strength fast and the quicker she got him taken care of, the faster she could take care of herself. "Xu is arranging a memorial service as we speak and she'll be contacting the next of kin, whoever that is," she added.

"Her father, General Caraway," he explained absently.

She looked at him in surprise, partly because he'd volunteered the information and partly because of what he'd said. "The Galbadian General?" she asked, knowing he probably wouldn't answer. He nodded.

Arriving on the main floor, she guided him towards the infirmary hoping that he wouldn't notice her objective until it was too late to argue with her about it. She'd feel better about leaving him if the wound in his shoulder was taken care of. He had refused to let the others treat him, refused to even interact with anyone but her—and would have refused that if she'd let him—and so she'd done her best with what she had. The wound was now a gash, about two inches long and two inches deep, rather than the three by six puncture it had been. Still, it was just asking for infection to set in and she knew he would probably forget about it.

He followed her quietly until he recognized the pale pink carpet under his feet. "No," he said, stopping dead in the path.

"Squall, you need to get that arm looked at," she explained, hoping he'd see reason.

"My arm is fine," he insisted, "what I need is to be left alone."

The words were like a slap. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice wavering, "I just—I'd feel better if someone healed it. I don't know when Adrian is due back from his mission so the infirmary is the only option. Plus Cid ordered everyone to check injuries in with the Infirmary," she pleaded, hoping that his sense of duty would win out. When he shook his head once more, she cajoled, "Just a quick visit—if the Doctor says its fine I'll take you straight to your dorm."

She felt lightheaded and had to let him go so she could lean shakily against the railing. He looked at her as if seeing her for the first time, which was probably the truth of the matter, she thought; he hadn't paid attention to anyone or anything for days. "You're the one who needs a doctor, you're pale," he noted with a tinge of concern.

"I'm always pale," she said, laughing a little and taking his arm again—thankful that he didn't stop her.

The infirmary was quiet when they stepped in and they were immediately ushered to a treatment room by a trainee. The trainee was much more adept with a Cura than Nichole could ever be, and soon they were on their way toward the dorms.

A wave of dizziness overtook her a few feet from his door and she had to clutch his arm to keep from falling. "Hyne, Nichole," he swore, steadying her, "you could have said something."

"Its fine," she lied. "I just missed a step, that's all."

He didn't look convinced but left her alone about it, punching in the code. She tapped the pad for the lights, taking note of her surroundings. His room was nicer and definitely cleaner than her own.

"I'm tired," Squall announced when she followed him into the bedroom, before he plopped onto the bed.

"I'll leave you to sleep then," she told him. "If you need anything my dorm is in the next hallway, five doors down. Quistis also said she'd most likely be in hers after she checked in with the Infirmary, which is closer."

He nodded, and as she left, she glanced back to see that he'd already curled up facing the wall. She worried about leaving him there, but knew that she couldn't be with him all of the time.

She concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other, the dizziness catching up to her again. The infirmary seemed impossibly far so she headed for her dorm instead, thinking that if she could just get some sleep she'd feel strong enough to seek her own treatment before the end of the day.

Her concentration was such that she didn't notice the man standing in her path until she'd run into him. He caught her by the shoulders, keeping her from falling and it was all she could do not to scream as his thumb pressed into the inflamed flesh around her wound.

"You never could watch where you were going." He sighed.

She blinked up at him… Adrian. Of course… could this day get any better?

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Can you move your hands?" she managed to ask—relieved as he complied—disconcerted when he simply moved them to her elbows. "Thanks for catching me," she added, trying awkwardly to remove herself from his grip.

He scrutinized her from head to toe, frowning. "I was actually coming to find you," he said absently. "I ran into Tobias and he gave your whereabouts. How's Squall doing?"

She sighed, hoping that he wouldn't notice that she was shivering again; as much as she knew she needed treatment, she wanted to find her bed that much more. If Adrian found out about her state she'd be stuck listening to a lecture in the Infirmary instead of sleeping. "He's not doing well, but he's coping."

"That's good to know. Tobias wasn't very helpful… he kept falling asleep in the middle of sentences, but that he sought me out to say he was worried about the two of you was rather telling."

"Tobias had the last preservation duty. I'm surprised he stayed awake long enough to talk at all, it was very draining," she explained, carefully avoiding Tobias' cause for concern.

"You look just as wiped out," he added, bringing the subject back to her again.

She nodded, gritting her teeth in frustration. The wound was bleeding again—she could feel the wet sticky liquid drip down her chest. She prayed it wasn't showing through the hole in her leather tank.

"Where are you off to then?" he pressed, before adding, "You should be in bed."

"That's where I was heading."

"I'll walk you there," he said.

Knowing she'd just waste what little energy she had left arguing with him, she turned, leading the way.

She managed a total of four steps before the dizziness overwhelmed her and her legs simply crumpled. She would have fallen but Adrian was right behind her, scooping her into his arms. She'd forgotten just how fast he could move.

"You always were such a terrible liar," he muttered into her hair. "Just how bad is it, really?"

"Bad," she said, noticing that some of her blood had transferred to his khaki-green over-shirt. He followed her gaze, cursing as he spun on his heel and rushed for the Infirmary.

"Why the fuck did you stand there and let me ramble on while you were bleeding?"

"I knew you'd overreact… I don't know… it seemed like a good idea at the time. I can walk, you know. Put me down."

He shook his head. "Walking will just make you bleed faster. What the hell happened, anyway?"

"The Sorceress used these magic ice shards in an attack," she explained absently. "One of them hit me in the shoulder."

"Did it exit through the back? Did it hit anything vital? How big was it?" he fired off.

She fought to concentrate enough to answer. "No, no, and I don't know, maybe four inches diameter."

"Did you try to heal it?"

"Of course I tried," she snapped, "you think I'd leave a hole in my shoulder for kicks?"

He had the decency to look sheepish. "I didn't mean it like that. I meant what did you try? Sorry."

"Wow, I must really look like shit to get an apology so easily. You're only ever nice when you're worried."

He didn't say anything and she sighed before answering his newly phrased question. "Cura and Cure. I ran out of Curaga pretty early on tending to a similar wound on Quistis. Luckily it worked on her—these things seem rather magic resistant. Then it got infected and I stopped trying; I remember enough of my Med training to know that you can't cure an infection with magic."

"I know Tobias carries antibiotics; why weren't you taking them?" he asked.

"Squall took one of the attacks meant for me. I couldn't heal his wound either and he's barely bothering to function right now. He needed them more than I did."

"Fucking useless," he bit out as the infirmary doors came into sight. She couldn't tell if he was talking about her or something else as he rushed inside.

The trainee that had help Squall earlier rushed over. "Healer Sprite, what can I do for you?" he asked.

She tuned Adrian out while he listed the supplies he needed, and set her down in a treatment room, but couldn't help but watch him as he worked. He was beautiful—she'd always thought so—but never so much as when he was in his element.

He peeled off his bloody outer shirt, turning his attention to the supplies the trainee brought back. He snatched a three liter bag of fluids from the pile, focusing on it. The purple-blue sparks of the Curaga gathered at his fingertips, then flowed through the plastic to fuse with the crystalloids in the liquid within. The spell wavered, trying to disperse but Adrian wouldn't let it, continuing to pour energy into it until the magic bent under his will.

The trainee looked on in awe at the now swirling blue mixture and Nichole knew it was probably something he knew how to do in theory, but would never be able to do himself. Adrian made it look so easy too, easy enough that after seeing him do it for the first time in Trabia, she'd tried it herself—with a simple Cure of course. She found the task completely impossible. Magic didn't like to be bound, especially to inanimate objects, and she'd gotten distracted, letting it escape after the initial push.

She lay her head back, feeling dizzy again. She didn't know if she fell asleep, but the next thing she knew she had an IV with antibiotics and the Curaga infusion hooked into her. The latter wouldn't do much while the infection still raged in her system but it would serve to lower her fever and keep her from bleeding out.

Adrian asked, "Did you want me to cut off your clothes or do it the hard way?"

"Hard way," she muttered, unwilling to let him further destroy her favorite outfit.

He sighed, motioning for the trainee to cap off her IV while he unzipped the leather tank. Between the two of them they managed to get her undressed with little fuss—leaving her bra in place to her relief.

Adrian slid the strap down her arm gently, examining the gaping hole stuffed to the brim with blood soaked bandages. He swore under his breath as the trainee gasped, but neither said anything as they got to work.

They injected anesthetic around the site and besides the sting of the needle, she felt nothing of what they did to clean it up. Soon they were done. The trainee inquired if the Healer needed anything else, then left them alone.

She fell back asleep—must have—because the next time she woke she could see the bone and muscle slowly re-knitting. That could only mean that the majority of the infection was out of her system. Adrian leaned casually against the treatment counter, watching the healing progress.

She felt remarkably better but was still exhausted, and it was everything she could do to stay awake.

"Welcome back," he muttered. "You should be feeling relatively pain free at the moment."

She nodded, gesturing to the pitcher of water on the counter, her mouth felt like a desert. He sighed and poured her a glass, then helped her sit to drink it. "Thanks," she whispered roughly when she'd finished.

He nodded once tersely and returned the cup to its counter. "What's wrong," she asked, her voice just a bit stronger.

He scoffed. "Whatever could be wrong? If you want to kill yourself so badly there are easier ways to go about it though. I recommend a clean slice through the jugular; you bleed out in seconds, no fuss. A lot of mess but beggars can't be choosers."

"What are you talking about?" she asked.

"You. Your constant death-wish. How stupid can you be, I mean, really? You stuff a wound with your t-shirt—found that out from Tobias—and then refuse to let someone else look at it—Quistis told me that—and then to top it all off you slip Squall your ration of antibiotics, which I had to learn from Seifer who'd seen you do it. The bacteria had already spread to your lungs; a couple more days and you would have drowned in your own bed, quite deliriously of course, but in more pain than you can imagine."

"I was coming to the Infirmary tonight," she retorted, but it sounded weak even to her own ears.

"And they wouldn't have been able to do shit!" Adrian yelled. "My mission was supposed to last a month; they wouldn't have had anyone here that could fix you! You would have died waiting for some healer to come in from Esthar, only this time awake and completely aware from all the drugs they force fed you trying to heal you themselves, and I-I wouldn't have even known about it." He raked his hand through his hair, his face a painful grimace.

"I'm sorry," she cried. "I wasn't thinking, they was so much to do and Squall—"

"Fuck Squall," Adrian hissed. "To take care of others, you have to take care of yourself first. It's the first thing you're taught in medic training; a dead medic is no use to anyone."

She smiled slightly. "Yes, well, if you remember correctly I flunked out of medic training and lost a student rank for it. And why was that?"

His eyes snapped to hers, trying to read her mood, and then he sighed, chagrinned and looked away. "It wasn't my fault you never paid attention."

She laughed, and although it hurt, she did it again. "Excuse me? You did everything you could to distract me, teasing, bullying, _flirting_…" she spat the last one; his biggest offense in her eyes. "…and then when that crotchety old Healer singled me out you played innocent and let him flunk me."

"You should have been paying attention, if I was able to do both you could have too," he commented.

She gritted her teeth. "Now listen here mister. I—"

"Look, I'm sorry okay? I shouldn't have messed with you during classes. Especially when what we were learning could have saved your life."

All of the wind left her sails, and she smiled. "Are you done lecturing me then? I really don't have a death wish, I promise. I happen to like living, even if life isn't kind."

They looked at each other and then both cracked up.

"I wanted to talk to you when I found you in the hall," Adrian said suddenly when they'd calmed themselves again, "about a few things, but namely about Anne."

"What happened?" she asked, knowing that it must be serious for him to seek her out.

"She was caught by the Galbadians and tortured. She seemed okay at first, but after we got back to Garden, she shut down. She won't talk to me about it, and Gavin says that if he even brings up Galbadia she gets nasty with him. She says she's fine but she's not acting like it. I was hoping you might be able to help her."

_Oh Hyne… first Squall and now this._ "Of course, I'll do what I can, but you know Anne, she'll take the time she needs to process things and then go back to normal."

"I know… I just don't like watching her suffer," he said, then changed the subject. "You should get some more sleep, I can tell you're fighting it."

"Could you make sure Squall's alright?" she asked, her words slurring. "I left him in his dorm, but I'm worried that he won't take care of himself."

"Sure," he said with a sigh, "your wish is my command. Now get some sleep."

"Thanks," she mumbled, before doing just that.

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, July 21, __082 ALC,__ 10:00 Hours_

The day of the funeral had dawned dark—dreary and drizzling—as if even the sky joined them in mourning. Nichole stood, some hours later, watching the rain-dotted forests of Balamb, noting that even they seemed more somber than usual.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been there, waiting for Squall to be ready. It had been five days since their return to Garden, and after her day-long stay in the infirmary it had been four days of nonstop activity, so she took the downtime given to her gratefully.

Four days prior she'd awoken alone in the small treatment room. For the first time in days her shoulder hadn't hurt, but with that relief came the distant ache that Adrian had just disappeared, yet again. The female trainee manning the desk had assured her that the Healer left no further instructions; just that she was free to go.

It had confused her; she had no idea where she stood with him. He'd acted so caring—like he actually gave a damn about her—but when she'd recovered, he simply abandoned her. If she hadn't been so used to the dance from Tobias, she would have given up on Adrian entirely. The difference was that she knew Tobias loved her, but when it came to Adrian she just couldn't tell. He treated her like an irritating brat that he was forced to babysit, but there were those times… times when she swore she felt something more from him.

After feeling sorry for herself, she'd gone to check on Squall. Adrian had checked in on him, she'd found out, but Squall didn't know or care where he'd gone after. She hadn't had time to go searching for him, or Anne as she'd promised, because shortly after that Quistis had shown up with an armload of documents. The Headmaster hadn't relented on giving Squall a leave of duty, and the things requiring the Commander's attention had been piling up while he was gone.

Quistis did her best to take on Squall's duties, but without being handed the Command she couldn't make the decisions for him, so it had fallen to Nichole to bully him into signing papers. When that didn't work Nichole had had to decide what could and couldn't wait and sometimes on the things that were urgent she'd been forced to make the decisions herself. She prayed constantly that she'd made the right ones… if they were wrong, doing as she had would get both Squall and her court marshaled.

The bathroom door opened revealing the worn but clean looking Commander. "You shaved…" she said, noting the lack of eight days' worth of growth.

"Rinoa wouldn't have liked the stubble, and she wouldn't like what I've been doing the past week. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused."

"You've been in mourning," she pointed out, waving off the apology, "there's nothing to be sorry for. You look snazzy," she said, changing the subject, "much better than the basic SeeD thing." She picked at her own skirted uniform.

He accepted her attempt to lighten the mood with ease. "You look fine. C'mon, we'd better go or we'll be late."

She smiled. "Rinoa would never forgive you," she teased without thinking. She froze when she realized what she'd said, praying that he wouldn't be upset by her callous humor.

He studied her for a moment, then his lips twitched into a facsimile of a smile. "No… no she wouldn't," he agreed, and Nichole let out the breath she'd been holding.

They walked in silence toward the Quad, where the ceremony was to be held as it was the only place large enough to hold all of the people who wished to attend. Nichole held nothing but contempt for those attending just to gawk at the last Sorceress or to see that she was truly dead, but she'd heard that General Caraway had insisted on a public memorial, so there was little to be done about it.

The Quad was packed with people when they arrived and very beautifully decorated. White and blue roses lined the room, presented in artful arrangements against black silk backdrops. The flowing water had been turned off for the occasion, and black candles floated peacefully amongst white lilies in the still pools. Rows upon rows of gleaming silver chairs lined the stadium area, separated into two sections by a deep sapphire carpet that paved the way up to the raised platform where Rinoa lay.

Rinoa seemed to float inside the center of a crystal box that rested on a table draped in black and light blue silk. She was dressed entirely in white and holding three blue roses in her folded hands. Nichole couldn't help but think of her as sleeping beauty, or perhaps Snow White, with her dark hair and pink lips. Nichole's eyes clouded with unshed tears at the comparison. Unlike the fairy tales, a kiss wouldn't wake this sleeping princess.

A few mourners were lined up down the right side of the room, waiting their turn to walk by the coffin and pay their respects, but most were now seated in the chairs. The viewing had been going on for hours—Squall had opted out of attending—but the actual ceremony would begin shortly.

Headmaster Cid was dressed in a severe black suit and stood gravely by the coffin, speaking to mourners as they approached it. He would oversee the ceremony, and then they would move the guests into the halls that had been set up to accommodate the mourners.

Nichole was a little surprised to see her old Matron standing next to him. She'd read somewhere that Matron Edea had been the Sorceress that led Galbadia during the last war but she hadn't expected to see her here of all places, clutching the Headmaster's arm.

Realizing they were starting to draw attention—standing as they were in the back of the room—she nudged Squall forward. All of the noise seemed to stop as they stepped onto the carpet leading to the front and Nichole caught sight of Quistis in the first row. Steeling herself against the stares, she nudged Squall again and they walked side by side down the aisle. Whispers followed in their wake but she ignored them, trying to pick out familiar faces in the crowd.

Gavin and Anne sat with Adrian about three rows behind where Quistis was. Seifer sat between a burly looking dark-skinned man and a very pale platinum-haired girl in the second row. To the other side of the burly guy sat a tiny woman with big auburn hair who waved wildly at Squall as he passed. The man next to her wore a cowboy hat with his SeeD uniform and tipped it at them.

Quistis smiled slightly at them as they approached their seats, but her usually clear blue eyes were red-rimmed and bright from where she'd been crying. Nichole sat next to her, putting Squall between herself and a solemn looking Zell—who just didn't quite seem himself dressed in the stiff formal SeeD attire.

"Man, this is depressing," he said, looking around at all the tearful faces. "Rinoa wouldn't have wanted people blubbering all over her, she would have told them to cheer up!"

Squall looked at him for a moment, like he'd grown a second head, but then he nodded. "You're right…"

Zell's mouth dropped open in a comical display as he gaped like a fish for a few seconds before he grinned widely and declared, "Welcome back, man. We missed you!"

Squall shook his head, exasperated by the display, but couldn't hide the fact that his lips quirked up just a little.

Quistis poked Nichole, leaning over to whisper, "At least something around here is getting back to normal. How'd you get him to come around?"

"I didn't," she whispered back. "He spent almost two hours in the bathroom this morning and came out clean and shaved and apologizing for being a burden. Said Rinoa wouldn't have liked what he was doing and got on with his morning."

Quistis nodded. "I'm so glad."

Tobias leaned over from Quistis' other side. "What are you two whispering about?"

Nichole shoved his face away. "Nothing that concerns you."

Quistis added, "Girl talk. Go away."

"I can tell when I'm not wanted, sheesh…" He pouted.

"I'm glad this all seems like a joke to you," a strong male voice butted in, "although it's not much more than I expected from SeeD."

Nichole looked up to find an older gentleman—probably somewhere in his fifties—dressed in full Galbadian regalia, his hands behind his back and an intense look of loathing on his face. Although she'd never met him personally, the spark of recognition was too intense to deny; feelings of hatred mixed with loving adoration washed over her. Rinoa's feelings, she realized after a few panicked moments. She shook her head to clear them away.

"General Caraway, sir—" Squall began, but the man raised one white gloved hand, cutting him off.

"And as for you…" he said to Squall. "I warned you that she hadn't had the training you had, the ability to fight. I didn't raise her to go off and join some military group. She didn't deserve to die in battle!" he spat, his face cherry red as he roared, "You killed her, you son of a bitch, you and your insignificant little mercenary outfit killed my little girl!"

"General," Cid greeted, clapping a hand on Caraway's shoulder. "I'm glad you could come… I'm so sorry for your loss."

Caraway turned on him. "Don't pull that diplomatic bullshit with me, Cid; it's as much your fault as it is his. I hope you all rot for what you did!"

"Be that as it may, I'm sure your daughter wouldn't appreciate us making a scene at her memoriam. Please, let's take this someplace more private." Cid laid a hand on the General's arm.

He shook it off violently. "I have nothing to say to you or anyone associated with your fool mercenary group. You'll get what's coming to you. I guarantee it!"

Rinoa would have been horrified at his behavior, but Nichole found it sad that she hadn't known how much he cared for her. What Rinoa would have seen as an embarrassing show-down was simply a grieving father who had loved his daughter. He'd wanted only the best for her. Nichole felt for him as he turned and walked with an air of dignity across the aisle to his seat. What he said wasn't true, of course; Rinoa had chosen her path, even in death. It wasn't Squall's fault, or SeeD's.

Squall collapsed back into his chair, his head in his hands, and traced his scar. Cid shook his head sadly before returning to the casket.

"Ignore him, man," Zell said, placing a comforting hand on Squall's shoulder, "Rinoa knew what she was getting herself into. She fought with us during the Sorceress War, went through time compression and handled becoming a Sorceress. She wanted to fight with us for the good that we could do, and in the end she gave her life to stop a someone from hurting those she loved. The only regret she would have had is that we never saw through the liberation of Timber."

Quistis smiled wryly. "We're still under contract…"

"So let's do it, then." Zell said enthusiastically, starting to rise. He was halted by a sharp look from Quistis, and sheepishly sat back down and whispered loudly, "Let's go liberate Timber… For Rinoa!"

Squall didn't look up, but his shoulders relaxed some and the rhythmic tracing of his scar slowly halted. Nichole was completely lost as to what they were talking about but when she turned to Quistis for answers, Quistis just mouthed the word 'later.'

Cid cleared his throat, the sound amplified by the mic that had been attached to his collar. "If you would all please find a seat." He waited until the stragglers did as he asked and the hall fell silent.

Looking around at all the mourners he began. "_A butterfly lights beside us like a sunbeam. And for a brief moment its glory and beauty belong to our world. But then it flies on again, and though we wish it could have stayed, we feel so lucky to have seen it...__(1)_

"We are gathered here today to give thanks for Rinoa Heartilly, who shared her life with us and died at the tender age of eighteen. It is in her memory that we gather."

He gestured to the girl. "She was a passionate, cheerful young lady, loved by many. We will remember her with the joy she has given us and the sorrow that her loss brings. A few eulogy poems have been selected in keeping with Rinoa's wishes for a short ceremony.

"_Birth is a beginning  
And death a destination  
But life is a journey  
A going – a growing  
From stage to stage  
From childhood to maturity  
And youth to age.  
From innocence to awareness  
And ignorance to knowing;  
From foolishness to discretion  
And then perhaps, to wisdom.  
From Weakness to strength  
Or strength to weakness  
And, often, back again.  
From health to sickness  
And back we pray, to health again.  
From offense to forgiveness,  
From loneliness to love,  
From joy to gratitude,  
From pain to compassion,  
And grief to understanding—  
From fear to faith.  
From defeat to defeat to defeat—  
Until, looking backward or ahead,  
We see that victory lies  
Not as some high place along the way,  
But in having made the journey, stage by stage.  
A sacred pilgrimage.  
Birth is a beginning  
And death a destination.  
But life is a journey,  
A sacred pilgrimage -  
Made stage by stage -  
To life everlasting_."_(2)_

Tears ran down Nichole's cheeks as he turned towards the casket, his arms spread wide. "In this we celebrate her life."

He turned back to the crowd. "We have elected today to keep with the family's wishes and will have halls one and two open and available for those who would like to honor Rinoa's memory. Refreshments will be provided and the Quad will re-open in an hour for private viewings.

"_Do not stand on my grave and weep;  
I am not there. I do not sleep.  
I am a thousand winds that blow.  
I am the diamond's glint on snow.  
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.  
I am the gentle autumn's rain.  
When you awaken in the morning's hush,  
I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight.  
I am the soft stars that shine at night.  
Do not stand at my grave and cry;  
I am not there. I did not die.__(3)_

"Thank you all for coming."

Squall was silent beside Nichole as people began to move, and whispered voices rose in the background. She placed her hand on his and he took the offered comfort, saying nothing. Quistis cried noiselessly to her other side, Tobias' arm wrapped around her shoulders.

A tall man approached, followed by a shorter, stockier one. "Squall… I heard what that man said to you and we wanted to tell you he was wrong. The princess was never happier than when she was with you, fighting with you and your friends."

Squall looked up. "Zone… and Watts, thank you… I'm glad you could come."

The man Nichole thought must be Zone grabbed his stomach, "OWW! My stomach hurts." He left quickly, hunched over, and she wondered what had happened.

"Same old Zone," Zell said. "How've you been, Watts?"

"Good, sir. We've been traveling on the White SeeD Ship. At least until we heard the news." Watts looked around, noticing that Zone had left the room. "Wait, sir! Don't leave me!" he yelled as he ran from the room.

"And same ol' Watts as well," Zell said with a laugh.

"Squall!" a higher pitched voice exclaimed, and the tiny woman with the big hair, that Nichole had noticed earlier, attached herself to him, squeezing her arms around his neck. "I'm so sorry about Rinny—" She sniffled loudly. "—It's such a Super Duper Mega Bummer!"

Squall nodded, untangling the girl from his person as the man she was with, the cowboy, strolled up. "I'm sorry, Commander. You know Selphie, hard to contain her."

"Heeey! Irvy!" the girl—Selphie—exclaimed.

"Anyway, I'm sorry about Rinoa, she was a beautiful girl," the guy said, ignoring her.

Squall just nodded again, and there were a few moments of semi-awkward silence before Zell spoke up. "Well, since the gang's all here, what do you say we go see what they meant by refreshments?"

"Hoping for hotdogs, are we?" Quistis chastised. "You never change. Well, we'll accompany you if you want."

Nichole started to rise to follow them, but stopped when Squall's grip on her hand tightened. "You guys go on ahead," she told Quistis, "we'll catch up."

"You sure?" Tobias asked, concern showing briefly on his features. Nichole knew he didn't fully approve of her need to take care of Squall. He couldn't understand that she felt she owed Squall, not only for saving her life, but for the lost life of his love.

She nodded at him, and he left with the others. It was a few minutes before the room cleared, leaving only her and Squall with the Sorceress floating amongst the crystal.

"Will you wait for me?" Squall asked her finally, pulling his hand from hers, his voice roughened with unshed tears.

"Of course," she agreed, assuming he wanted time to say his goodbyes. "I'll wait in the back if you'd like?"

He nodded and she rose leaving him to go stand by the edge of the pool of water furthest away from the rostrum. She leaned against the railing that separated the water from the walkway, staring at the candles, giving him the space he needed.

"How you holding up, girl?" Nichole jumped slightly at the words, then smiled as Anne leaned against the railing next to her. She looked gorgeous as usual, making even the stodgy SeeD regalia look like it was made for her, but Nichole could see the ghosts of fatigue around her eyes.

"Fine, just waiting for Squall. I could ask you the same."

"I've been better, I've been worse…" Anne said, staring into the flames of the little black candles. "I heard that you were wounded on the Sorceress mission," she said, changing the subject.

_Adrian and his big mouth…"_Yeah, took an ice shard through the shoulder. Hurt like hell but wasn't that big of a deal."

"That's not what Adrian said. He said it was bad enough he couldn't actually heal it right away—said you were stupid of course, but that's Adrian for you."

"Yeah," she agreed sadly. He thought her stupid and immature and probably disgusting to boot.

Anne pulled on Nichole's arm so she was facing her, her concern evident. "What's he done this time?"

"Nothing, really," she admitted—that was the problem. "He's just so damn confusing."

"Girl, the first thing you need to realize is that all men are confusing."

"How much did he tell you about the night before you guys left?" Nichole asked suddenly, before she could stop herself. She was just so _tired _of walking on eggshells.

"Just that we would have to find out your story on our own, he wasn't going to violate the confidence you put in him. A little about the situation he found you in. I'm so sorry we didn't notice how much you were hurting."

"You wouldn't have known," she reassured her, "I didn't remember most of it myself until I was in that coma… Anyway, did he tell you anything else?"

"He said that you had fallen into a rather awkward position and rather than ravish you as he wanted to he settled for dinner and a movie." She giggled. "Honestly, you two have been dancing around each other for so long it's no secret. Well, to anyone but yourselves."

Nichole blushed. "I was that obvious?"

Anne laughed. "In a word—yes—but it's okay. It's not obvious to him or he'd have done something by now."

"I don't think he likes me like you think."

"What makes you say that? The man is head over heels for you. What you called no big deal with your injury, about gave him a coronary."

"Sure has a funny way of showing it," Nichole muttered. "I mean, he did carry me to the infirmary all commando style then gave me the lecture of my life, and when I woke up the second time he was just gone."

"Oh my Hyne," Anne giggled out from behind her hand, "he wussed out."

"What?"

"I know for a fact he was heading back to the infirmary, that yellow-bellied coward." Nichole couldn't wrap her mind around the thought of Adrian as a coward, he seemed invincible. "And now I see what happened," Anne continued, "he left you on the day of the mission as well. So you were understandably hurt, and I bet he's been avoiding you the past five days."

It was probably true, but Nichole gave him the benefit of the doubt. "I don't know about that, I've been so busy I wouldn't have noticed either way. I'm just so confused, and what exactly would he be afraid of anyway?"

"Rejection, of course. He'll either come around, or you could always make the first move, but don't doubt that he likes you."

Nichole nodded, still not believing her, but conceding the point. "Thanks… but speaking of Adrian, he wanted me to talk to you."

"I figured as much… he never can leave well enough alone." She shook her head. "I'm fine, really. The bastards did a number on me but he healed the damage. It was my own fault I got caught. Adrian wanted to get me out right away, but I told him no, to get Gavin out first. Now Adrian feels responsible in one way and Gavin in another and both are treating me like I'm made of glass. Instead of laying the blame on my bad decision, they're blaming each other and themselves."

She smiled dreamily. "And the thing is I'd almost thank the guys that caught me, considering the outcome on Gavin's front."

"I don't need to know details if you're implying what I think you are." Anne had always been just a touch promiscuous.

"That goes double for me when Adrian finally gets the balls," Anne agreed.

Nichole choked at the thought.

A hush settled over the room and she was reminded of why they were there to begin with. It was an odd conversation to have at a funeral. But life went on, and at Garden life went on rather quickly. To SeeDs, funerals were just another part of being a mercenary, and the mercenary's path was never easy. But knowing that it was part of who they were didn't stop the mourning, it didn't cure the hurt of those left behind, and it didn't help when it became real, when the job took everything from them. She smiled sadly at Anne, seeing her thoughts reflected in her friends eyes, and they turned, linking their arms and leaning on each other while they waited for Squall to finish saying his goodbyes to the Sorceress that had stolen his heart.

-oooOooo-

**AN:** I expected reviews after killing Rinoa, even if it was of the flaming variety, but nothing, nada, zilch. Crazy. I'm kinda disappointed.

Thanks as always to Kimmae for her wonderful editing.

(1) The excerpt from "A Symbol of Hope" is by **unknown****.**

(2) "Sympathy Poem" is by **Rabbi Alvin I. Fine**

(3)"Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep" is a lovely poem by Mary Elizabeth Frye


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter ****Fifteen**

'Cause my shackles, you won't be, and my raptures, you won't believe

_Deling Palace, Deling City, Galbadia, July 20, 082 ALC, 11:26 Hours_

She hurt… the pain was a constant buzz sitting at the base of her skull, tormenting her with its endless hum. Griever had come closer to ending her than she'd ever thought he could.

Still, she was grateful for her freedom. She'd been planning an escape of some sort since she'd first been bound to the rock. She'd searched for a way to subvert the spell but hadn't held much hope until she'd stumbled across the Sorceress separated from time.

Ultimecia, a woman after Valora's own heart, had cast out a web for a fly and managed to snare a spider instead. Following the strands of power back to their source had been child's play, and discovering the Sorceress' intentions, simplistic.

Ultimecia's idea of time compression, while interesting, was not what Valora had in mind. Time was a fickle mistress, who didn't tolerate any meddling within her realm. Still, Valora could see the beauty of the mayhem that the plot would cause. The problem was that Ultimecia's scheme hinged entirely on finding a girl in the past with the ability to cast a mortal's consciousness through time.

Valora had eventually agreed to help, if only to ease her own boredom. She'd gotten so much more than expected.

Ultimecia's true power shone the moment her consciousness entered another's. The Sorceress' ability to manipulate minds, to lock away the consciousness within the body and force hers into its place, was simply delicious. There was much Valora could do with a gift so similar to her own ability of seeing others' innermost thoughts and influencing them to do her bidding.

However, nothing had gone to plan. Destiny—the fool Guardian of humanity—had obviously known of Ultimecia's goals and had taken the necessary steps to place both her daughter and her chosen directly into the mix. Thankfully, the prized daughter became Ultimecia's pawn and when he finally got around to interfering, the hero's knowledge of the Sorceress' plans had been vague at best.

It gave Valora time to convince Ultimecia to change her plans, to try something else, but the future Sorceress could not be swayed. With Ultimecia determined to follow her own goals, Valora moved on to greener pastures.

Rinoa, the girl Ultimecia had dismissed as useless in favor of the seemingly stronger Sorceress Adel, had become Valora's new vessel. Ultimecia had dismissed the girl's special ability out-of-hand, saying that anybody could accept the Sorceress' burden, but Valora knew it was so much more than that. Rinoa had accepted a burden from a Sorceress not yet dead. It was simply unheard of. Hyne's curse upon her children had been absolute—the passing of power could only take place when their human hearts no longer beat.

Rinoa suited Valora's plans perfectly. It had been easy to gain access to her mind; the girl was so afraid of her gift that she did her best to ignore it. Which made it that much easier for Valora to slip past her defenses and implant herself deeply within the girl's psyche.

Valora had studied Ultimecia's mind control method extensively and found that while the process was draining and left her vulnerable, she could mimic it for a short time.

It was—dare she say it—fun. Manipulating people had always been her favorite pastime, and Rinoa was so easily fooled. That her little pawn was 'good' had made it that much more exciting. Destiny and her chosen wouldn't know what hit them. Valora had watched gleefully as power after power was given to the child; all the while guiding her, molding her into the perfect servant. When time compression had failed, as she'd seen it would, Valora had finally been ready to put her plans in motion. The Sorceress with the power of four would be the one to free Valora from the prison built by her predecessors.

Once Valora was free from her curse, she would put humanity on the path to such destruction that even Destiny wouldn't be able to save the wretched creatures.

Of course, since the universe was one cold bitch, it was then that Valora's grand plans began to unravel at the seams. Her niece—the chosen successor to her power—reappeared. It had only taken seconds for her to recognize the girl. She was the spitting image of her mother—the head bitch of the witches who'd stuck her in that infernal cavern. There was only one difference. She had Alexis' eyes.

She'd seen the girl before, through the memories of her most loyal servant, Baron Hart. Baron had stumbled upon his mistress through sheer blind luck—the will of Chaos itself. She'd been so bored at the time—was always bored—that rather than kill him outright, she'd searched his memories to see if he'd be any use to her. She'd expected to find something to torment the man, but instead what she had found had been most unexpected. One of her darling brother's brats right there in the man's custody.

Suddenly she found herself with the means to get revenge on Alexis, who—while not directly responsible for her current predicament—hadn't lifted a damn finger to help her. She knew that the remaining angels were assigned to watch over the children; almost everything that went on in the High Plane was reported to her in some way or another. She wasn't entirely sure of the particulars, but the idea of her brother having to watch his baby girl suffer day after day, and not be able to do anything about it was too great to pass up.

Baron, in perhaps the most upstanding move she'd seen out of him, had been a tough sell on her plan for revenge. He had no interest whatsoever in the brat—she was just a means to an end for him. Eventually between her promises and influence, he'd fallen to Valora's whims and done as he was told. She only wished she could have seen the look on Alexis' face as his little girl was violated.

When the girl had disappeared, Valora had been livid. The tower of Chaos had reacted—for the first time since Valora's banishment—the day the child disappeared. Valora had held her salvation in her hands without even knowing it, and it had slipped right through her fingers like grains of sand. She had almost self-destructed in her rage.

As it was, it had taken Valora a few years to forgive Baron enough to re-include him in her plans. She would have done away with him, but she'd decided that she needed someone with the bloodlines and the money to become influential in world politics. She could have played the part directly, but what, truly, was the fun in that? No… having the little maggots destroy themselves would be so much more satisfying.

With the return of the girl, however, she could see all of her carefully laid plans crumbling to dust. In all her strategies, she'd forgotten one simple thing: With her replacement still breathing, Valora would never be able to succeed. The threat of having her tower taken from her was just too great to ignore.

The aspect was fighting her now. She tried not to think of his ultimate betrayal, but there was no avoiding it. Chaos had given the damnable girl Valora's power. She was under his protection. After all of the years Valora had put into realizing the aspects goal of freedom, he had decided he no longer wanted the destruction of the universe... that he _liked_ his new chosen. It made Valora want to scream, to rage, to breakdown, but she wouldn't. She would follow the plan and end this miserable existence once and for all.

Valora had known that Chaos wouldn't heed her call to destroy its chosen, so she'd been forced to use other means. Rinoa had proven quite useful in that regard. It had been easy to plant the idea that her niece was trying to steal Rinoa's love from her. Rinoa's own insecurities provided fuel for the rest.

The tower had thwarted Rinoa's attempt on the girl's life, but her attack had provided Valora with a chance to invade her niece's mind. She'd planned to trap the girl within her memories of pain, but was surprised to find that they were gone, hidden behind a very elaborate spell. She'd settled for throwing the girl into a comatose dream instead.

She hadn't expected Xavier's interference, or that Baron's assassination attempt would fail. Rinoa had surprised her as well, throwing off her control long enough to take her own life.

She could see now that she should have known better. Love lay just as much in the realm of Chaos as it did in Order. Bringing the little lion into the mix had not been the best idea, but he was just so damn… tempting.

Valora smiled just thinking about the horrified grief on Squall's face as the shard struck Rinoa's chest… yes, having him there had definitely been entertaining.

It would have been worth it if the girl that just wouldn't die hadn't foiled her yet again. That her successor still lived simply rankled, but what was even more worrying to Valora was that now, not only did the girl have ties to the tower, she was chock full of the power Rinoa had gathered.

Valora's only hope was that the little bitch still couldn't control the tower. She'd tried; Valora had felt the power calling out in its need to answer her, but the girl couldn't control _herself_ well enough even to think about controlling Chaos.

Valora had learned long ago that the only emotion Chaos truly channeled through was anger. Anything else it would twist to suit to its own needs. Until the girl learned that, Valora would always come out on top.

The waiting was getting to her, all her careful planning had come to naught and her powers were regenerating too slowly for her tastes. However, all of the time she'd spent cooped up in Baron's meager infirmary had given her time to rethink her strategy.

The girl couldn't be touched directly, at least not until Valora herself was ready to confront her, but indirectly… That showed promise… She would torture her dear niece with her own inadequacies—her helplessness—as her life came crashing down around her.

Baron was working diligently to see the first part of Valora's plans through.

It was almost too bad that she'd have to kill him. He was such a useful little minion. His lust-driven ways were just so predictable… almost cute. She'd never planned on fulfilling her promises, so she'd simply have to use his demise to the best effect.

The plans were in motion… all she had to do now was wait.

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, August 4, 082 ALC, 14:30 Hours_

Squall sat, head in hands, at one of the bright blue tables in the back of the Cafeteria, as Nichole gleefully took yet another of his level 8 Triple Triad cards. She'd just finished beating him for the third time in a row, and while his ego was in tatters, he was counting himself lucky that she wasn't playing for keeps.

"And they call you the king of cards?" she asked, her amber eyes sparkling with mirth.

"Having level 10 cards helps a lot, eh, Squall?" Tobias ribbed from further down Nichole's side of the table—where he sat studying his own game against Gavin.

"Yeah, see if I dumb down my deck for you again," Squall warned the gloating girl, who was sorting out his cards from her own.

He stopped, wondering what the hell had possessed him to say that. Nichole beamed at him, handing him what he'd lost. It felt weird to have things getting back to normal, but Rinoa would have wanted it that way.

Rinoa… thinking of her brought an ache to his chest that he knew would never quite go away. It had been so bad when she was taken from him that he was sure a piece of himself went with her. He hadn't wanted to continue living. He'd been so deep in his grief that even functioning had ceased to matter.

Nichole hadn't let him stay in that place for long. She'd bullied her way into his presence and then refused to leave, no matter what he said or how much he ignored her. She had saved him, but it was Rinoa who had finally convinced him to start living again.

He'd had a dream—it had seemed so real—Rinoa had told him to remember what she'd said. He couldn't just depend on himself; he had friends, those who loved him. He needed to live for her, to see that the world continued and that Valora fell.

He felt like she asked too much. When she disappeared and he'd awoken knowing that her empty shell was all that remained, it felt like she had already taken his world with her. Gaea wasn't worth saving without her in it. But he couldn't let her down, so he'd followed her words, trying his best to return to how she wanted him to be.

"Eh, don't mind her, Squall. It's hard to beat someone who has no strategy," Gavin soothed.

Squall shook his head. He'd forgotten for a moment all about the conversation and Nichole's victory.

Nichole pouted. "I do too have a strategy," she declared. "Just because you guys can never figure it out doesn't mean anything!"

Squall smirked at her indignant huff. As much as he'd protested being dragged out of his office to play cards, he had to admit it was a good idea. He felt closer to the verge of happiness than he had in weeks.

From his vantage point, he noticed Quistis enter the Cafeteria. She made herself a cup of tea before heading in their direction.

"Playing games, I see." She smiled, taking the vacant seat between Tobias and Nichole. "Who's winning?"

"Can't tell at this point, could be a draw," Tobias muttered absently, studying the board intently for his next move.

Quistis nodded, then leaned over, whispering something into his ear. His face lit up and he played his Wendigo Card, flipping two of Gavin's.

"Hey, no fair!" Gavin protested. "I call interference! Cheaters, the both of you!"

"How do you know she said anything that had to do with cards?" Tobias asked, wiggling his eyebrows in a comically suggestive manner.

Nichole and Quistis giggled while Gavin frowned. "You never would have seen that move on your own…" Gavin grumbled, placing his last card and setting the game at a draw.

"What are we all up to?" Anne asked, as she walked to where Gavin was.

"I _was_ beating the pants off of him, until he received some outside help," Gavin complained.

Anne smiled, kissing his cheek. "Looks like a draw to me," she said, before sitting between Gavin and Squall. "And how did you fare?" she asked, turning to Squall.

"She won," he admitted.

Anne shot Nichole a mega-watt smile. "That's my girl!"

Nichole shook her head. "He dumbed his deck down for me or I'd have never had a chance."

"So," Anne said, changing the subject, "there's a movie playing at fifteen hundred on the Quad's big screen, anyone want to join me?"

Squall shrugged as he watched the others nod. There hadn't been anything pressing on his desk when he'd left. Quistis would have told him if that had changed, so he might as well make a day of it. He wasn't very interested in going to the Quad—the last time he'd set foot there was for Rinoa's funeral—but he supposed he'd have to face it sooner or later. At least the others would be there.

It had been surprising how quickly he'd fallen into Nichole's group of friends. It helped that he knew most of them from the orphanage, but still, he would have never expected the amount of acceptance or friendship that they'd so easily given him. The only two people at Balamb that he still felt close to—Quistis and Zell—were integrated as well, so it had become the norm.

He didn't realize everyone had cleared out until Nichole gently tapped his shoulder. "You don't have to go, you know. We could do something else if you like, or if you have to get back to work I'm sure everyone will understand."

He shook his head, grateful for her thoughtfulness, but unwilling to back down. He wouldn't turn tail and run; he would go to the movie and he would try to have fun with his friends, as Rinoa would have wanted. "No… I'll be fine. Is that where everyone went?"

She nodded. "They're going to save seats."

"We should go, then."

They walked in silence to the Quad and were just entering as Zell burst out, crashing headlong into Nichole. Squall—who saw the impending collision a second before it happened—just barely managed to keep her from going down, but overbalanced Zell in the process, sending him to the floor.

"OWW man, that hurt!" he exclaimed, climbing to his feet while rubbing his backside. "Just who I was looking for, though! You guys gotta come quick, there's a big announcement comin' in over the air from Galbadia!"

Squall's stomach flipped, even as his mind raced. "Like the one in Timber?" he asked.

Zell nodded, his mouth a grim line. "Exactly," he agreed, turning on his heel and rushing back into the Quad.

"Come on," Squall prompted, grabbing Nichole's hand, and dragging her behind him._ What could it be this time? _

The screen rolled over the front part of the stage had a timer displayed boldly across it, ticking down. Zell waved them to a row of blankets strewn across the floor to provide makeshift seating. He sat with a cluster of people near the front. Anne scooted closer to Gavin, giving Nichole room to sit beside her, while Squall squatted at the end.

"What's going on?" Nichole asked.

Quistis, who was sitting next to Tobias on the other side of Gavin, answered, "They've said that they're going to make a world-wide announcement in five minutes, and then the timer appeared. As you can see, we've got less than a minute to go."

"I don't like this…" Squall muttered, thinking aloud.

"Don't like what?" Adrian asked as he came in behind them. He tugged Nichole's hair affectionately, and she turned, glaring and slapped his hands away. He smirked, plopping down behind her. She stiffened at the proximity but otherwise ignored him. Squall wondered just what the hell was going on between them.

"About time you showed up," Anne groused. "They're making some big announcement. Now hush, it's about to start."

The numbers reached zero and the screen went snowy before clearing to show the Galbadian Sigil prominently displayed over an empty podium. A short blonde man crossed the stage, walking up to the microphone.

"People of the world," he started, gesturing with open arms, "it is with great sorrow that I stand before you today. The beloved President of Galbadia, Baron Hart, is dead. He was assassinated in his office yesterday. Here to comment on this horrible tragedy is his widow—and the new President of Galbadia—Valora Hart." Murmurs rose behind Squall as those gathered took in the information and the woman of his nightmares walked sedately to the podium. She looked every part the grieving widow; from her stylish black gloves to her demurely cut black dress. Her hair, once free and flowing, was twisted up into a chignon, topped by a small lace hat to which her veil was attached.

"Thank you, Counselor…" she said to the man in a mournful tone, before turning to address the nations. "I come before you today as a widow, grieving for her husband, and as the ruler of the greatest nation on Gaea. I wish to extend the hand of diplomacy to those who would stand with Galbadia in this, her darkest hour, while we work to bring those who killed… who killed our beloved President to justice. He was murdered in an act of cowardice by people who cling to the shadows and kill for the highest bidder."

She bowed her head as she discreetly wiped away a tear. Squall had to hand it to her; she certainly had flair for the dramatic.

"My Chief of Security discovered that it is the mercenary group, SeeD, that is responsible for my husband's death. It is unknown at this time whether they were acting alone or under contract. For too long have these mercenaries wreaked havoc on the law abiding citizens of the world. For too long have they gone unchecked, allowed to do as they will, wherever they will. I am here today to say no more! No more will we allow SeeD to go unpunished."

_SeeD… shit, shit, shit! Why is she targeting SeeD?_ Had he pissed her off so much that she decided to target his people? Or was this just another ploy to bring Nichole into her grasp?

"It has been unanimously decided that Galbadia declares all of SeeD and its affiliates to be terrorists. Anyone known to be harboring said terrorists will be tried to the fullest extent of the law. The Gardens have twenty-four hours to surrender to Galbadia or Galbadia will be forced to declare war on them and all who support them."

Her eyes clouded, rather convincingly, with tears. "No longer will we stand by idly while a highly trained militant group does what it pleases with people's lives. No longer will we allow these murdering mercenaries to cast fear amongst the law abiding citizens of the world. No longer…" She bowed her head, choking on her last words, allowing a tear to spill over. It trailed down her cheek, glinting in the light of the cameras, before she turned and left the stage.

Squall's brain was racing a mile a minute, going through scenario after scenario of just how another SeeD crusade would affect his people as the Counselor took the stand again.

"Thank you, President Valora, for that moving speech. It is truly a sad day for the people of the world. Those that have grievances with the parties mentioned are urged to contact the Galbadian Legal Department. Thank you all for your attention," he said, before the camera panned to the Galbadian Sigil and contact information for the Galbadian Legal Department scrolled across the screen.

The room that had been so silent you could've heard a pin drop suddenly erupted into pandemonium as students and staff alike postulated on what the announcement meant for Garden—for them. Only amongst his group did the silence remain.

Ding, Ding, Dong… "Squall Leonhart and Quistis Trepe, report immediately to the Headmaster's office. I repeat, Squall Leonhart and Quistis Trepe, report immediately to the Headmaster's Office. Everyone else, please return to your dorms. Further instructions will be provided shortly," Xu's voice ordered over the intercom.

Quistis rose. "We'd better go."

Squall nodded. Rising to his feet, he took one last look at the group before turning and leaving.

"We'll figure out what's going on," Quistis told Tobias, then including the group in general, added, "I'll fill you all in as soon as possible."

Squall felt Nichole's amber eyes on him all the way to the elevator. He hadn't meant to look at her, hadn't wanted to, knowing what he'd see. Guilt, sorrow, worry… She'd shouldered the responsibility for Rinoa's death, and he knew she would shoulder this as well.

As much as his head was sure that Rinoa's death wasn't Nichole's fault, some traitorous part of him—the part that was still raw, angry, and grieving—felt that maybe it was. Just thinking of it left a sour taste in his mouth, and having her look at him with such haunted eyes had left a chunk of lead in the pit of his stomach.

As if he didn't have bigger things to worry about…

The junior staff members were running around the halls in a barely controlled frenzy as he and Quistis disembarked the elevator on the third floor. The Headmaster's office was calm by comparison. Cid, Xu, Nida, and Dr. Kadowaki gathered around Cid's desk, waiting for them to arrive. Edea came through the door leading to Cid's private apartment, holding a steaming pitcher of hot coffee in one hand and a stack of cups in the other.

"I thought we all might need this before the day is through," she noted, as she set her load down on the small oak coffee table that sat between two blue wing-backed chairs.

Cid smiled at her as she joined him, before turning to all those gathered. "I've called you all here to talk of the new President's demands. At the same time that she was making her public speech, a list of terms was sent to each of the Gardens." He folded his hands behind him. "We are to surrender the Gardens to the Galbadians at once. Those who are not SeeD will be spared, given a sentence of one year's probation with 'community service'. Those in SeeD will be tried publicly for their 'crimes against humanity' and punished accordingly. Capital punishment can and will be the outcome of most of these trials."

"We can't surrender!" Xu exclaimed. "We've done nothing wrong."

Cid held up a hand. "Let me finish… If we resist, Galbadia will declare war against all of the Gardens—not just Balamb—as well as anyone—and they mean _anyone_—known to be affiliated with them."

"That'll mean the families as well," Dr Kadowaki said sadly.

"Were there any demands specific to us?" Quistis asked.

Cid glanced at her over his spectacles before shaking his head.

_What was Valora playing at? She would go through all of this just to get at one woman? No, there must be something more to it… but what?_ In the meantime, surrender was not an option. Yet how was he going to protect those who were merely affiliated with them?

Everyone had turned to him, looking for his opinion, for the answers. He couldn't let them down. "Surrender is not an option," he said, putting his thoughts into words.

Cid looked both relieved and determined. "That is my feeling as well," he agreed. "We will put it to a vote in a moment, but I needed to know your stance as once again, Garden—in truth, all the Gardens—will be handed over to your command."

Cid's eyes bored into him, studying his reaction. Squall didn't care. For once, he actually felt ready for the responsibility. He knew what needed to be done, and this time he wouldn't let his fear of failure stop him from doing his duty. "I'm ready and waiting, sir."

Cid smiled sadly, before bringing up the links to Trabia and Galbadia Gardens on the big screen behind him. There were three people waiting on each screen, and with them present, the entire Garden Committee was on hand.

"Your votes, please," Cid stated.

The head of Galbadia Garden, Headmaster Martine, sighed. "We vote that surrender is not an option, but at this time we have little to offer in the light of war. We've already foiled one attempt to acquire the Garden. There have been indications of a military force gathering in the Roshfall Forest and the repairs to the Galbadian Missile Base have been deemed top priority by the government. As such, we are mobile and moving and plan to stay that way while we wait for further orders."

Cid nodded. "Understood… and Trabia?"

"We agree," Headmaster Dascal of Trabia said, "surrender is not our choice, but at the moment we are not able to support any war efforts. We are currently ninety percent repaired and should be able to join the fight soon. All of our concentration is on getting mobile, and the two SeeDs you've provided have been invaluable to us. With help from the technicians of Fisherman's Horizon, the repairs are being completed in double time. We request that the SeeDs remain here until the Garden is fully functional."

"Yes, we should be able to swing that," Cid agreed. "I want you mobile as soon as possible. I don't like this new business with the rebuilding of the missile base. As always, Balamb is at your service, should you need reinforcements."

He turned back to Squall. "It is decided then. Come what may, Garden will not surrender. Commander Leonhart, you are in charge. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, we will contact you when plans have been made."

The screen behind him went blank after the others saluted. Cid sighed. "I will work on following up with the President's claim of 'assassination'; if there is any truth to the matter, we'll need to be informed."

Squall nodded absently, thinking about just what would need to happen now, and what could wait.

Xu turned to him. "Well, Commander, what are your orders?"

He sighed. "I want Garden mobile ASAP; sound the departure for thirty minutes—Nida, you think you can get this thing started and ready to go by then?"

"Roger! I'll get right on it." He nodded, saluting quickly before running for the door.

"As of now, all SeeDs are back on active duty," Squall continued. "I want all SeeDs currently on leave to be contacted and debriefed on the situation. Orders are to meet with Balamb Garden at Fisherman's Horizon by 22:00 hours; anyone further out than that can arrange to be picked up by the Ragnarok."

Xu saluted. "Okay, got it. I'll start the calls."

He'd already moved on. "Dr. Kadowaki, I want you to lead the efforts to contact the students and their families. Commandeer as many staff as you need to get the job done. I want all of the students contacted, and all of the families informed of the situation. Each of them should be given the option to cut all ties or set up arrangements for the students to return to their assigned Gardens and the families to be taken aboard either Trabia or Galbadia Garden."

Dr. Kadowaki nodded with an approving smile on her lips. "Of course. I'll get right on that."

Squall shuffled through the hundreds of details needing to be addressed for the most important.

"Matron…" he called.

"Yes, dear?"

"Could you lead the round-up of the junior classmen? I'd like to send all of those without family to the White SeeD. I don't like the idea of them sitting around the Gardens."

"Oh… yes, I can arrange that." Edea smiled at his thoughtfulness. "Just the ones here, or from Trabia and Galbadia as well?"

"From all of the Gardens, if the ship has enough room," Squall amended.

"Certainly, I'll get right on it."

"Thanks," Squall said, a little uncomfortably. It just felt weird having his Matron as part of those he commanded.

Cid—finished with his phone calls—approached, looking for an update.

"Headmaster," Squall acknowledged him, "as of now the plan is to be mobile within the half-hour; call all of those directly associated with Garden and offer them sanctuary within either Trabia or Galbadia Gardens. All of the junior classmen without families are going to the White SeeD; and all SeeD have been called back to active duty and are to meet us at FH or contact Xu for pickup. If you could contact Trabia and Galbadia and get them prepared to handle refugees, we should have all the bases covered."

"Understood," Cid said. "Good job. Offering asylum to the families is an excellent notion and it should help the other Gardens feel useful in this." He went back to his desk, absentmindedly picking up the phone.

Squall almost stopped him—he was curious as to what the Headmaster had found out about the supposed assassination—but decided it was best to let him do what he was doing.

"Once Garden is mobile, where are we heading?" Quistis asked.

He just barely stopped himself from jumping—he'd forgotten that she was there. "We'll stay at sea until the rendezvous time. I don't want to overstay our welcome at FH, so we'll dock just long enough to load those that meet us and as many supplies as they can to spare."

"Sounds like a good plan. There doesn't seem to be anything to do at the moment but wait. Dr. Kadowaki and Xu will need to finish their tasks before we know what we're really dealing with. You should make an announcement before we depart; it's always managed to calm the panic before."

"Hyne… do I have to? I hate those speeches," he admitted, "I never know what to say."

Quistis looked shocked for a moment—probably because he'd actually volunteered something of himself—but recovered quickly. "Yes, you have to," she teased. "Apparently stumbling around for words motivates the general public like nothing else."

His lips curled in a tiny smile. "Fine, be that way… see if I choose you for my team."

Quistis' short bell-like laughter rang off the walls, and it took her a moment to calm and speak again. "Yeah, well… who _are_ you planning to recruit?"

Squall smiled fully now, feeling like for the first time he'd actually found some middle ground with his blonde assistant—stodgy Quistis actually had a sense of humor… who knew? "Well, you, maybe, if I don't have to do the speech, and probably Nichole. Zell's the only one I trust to pilot the Ragnarok, so he'll be busy for a while. Besides, Nichole did a good job while I was…" He searched for the right word.

"Indisposed?" Quistis offered.

"Yeah, that'll work," Squall agreed.

"We should go let her know then."

All of the decisions he'd made so far weighed heavily in his mind as he followed Quistis to the elevator. What if he transferred all of the junior classmen to the White SeeD Ship and then it was overrun? What if they couldn't get to everyone before Valora began her crusade?

He'd always felt so inadequate in the seat of command. There were so many people depending on him. Even when he knew exactly what Garden should do, he never felt it was good enough. He'd been so relieved when the war had ended and he'd been assigned as _just _the Commander of SeeD.

The title sounded impressive, but unless there was an emergency, he was just a glorified paper pusher. The only power he had was determining who went on what mission. The missions themselves were all chosen ahead of time by Cid or the Garden Committee. He had some minor influence over the running of the Garden, but the Headmaster was the one in charge.

His thoughts were interrupted as the elevator dinged its arrival on the first floor. Zell was waiting for them just outside, throwing a flurry of punches and kicks at an invisible foe. Squall was struck by the parallel of when he'd first been assigned to work with the hyperactive blonde.

"About time, man!" he called out, executing a round-house kick that would have easily dropped a man. "The rest are waiting for ya on the first bench."

"The rest?" Quistis wondered as they followed him around the bend.

She received her answer when the bench came into view. Tobias, Anne, and Gavin sat in a row on the carved wood, while Nichole perched on the arm leaning on Gavin's shoulder. Adrian was slightly behind them, resting against the wall lining the circular area.

"The gang's all here, then," Quistis said.

Tobias nodded. "What's going on?"

"Valora has demanded that we surrender the Gardens and everyone in them to Galbadia. We would stand trial for 'crimes against humanity', the outcome of which would most likely be capital punishment. Of course that's not an option, so we're preparing for a fight. Garden will disembark for Fisherman's Horizon within the hour," Quistis recapped.

Gavin whistled. "Anything we can do to help?"

"Try to calm the panic where you can," Squall said. "Adrian, they could probably use you in the infirmary. Dr. Kadowaki is currently leading a massive project and I'm sure she'd appreciate you keeping things in line."

"Of course…" Adrian sighed, boosting himself to his feet. "My job is never done." He performed a mock bow and half-assed salute before sauntering off.

"He never changes," Nichole muttered under her breath.

Anne laughed. "Nope."

Squall ignored them. "Zell, I want you to go find Xu. She's setting up transports of SeeDs to be picked up in the Ragnarok and I want you to pilot it."

"Alright!" he exclaimed, jumping up and cracking his knuckles. Squall shook his head at his lack of restraint, but couldn't help the slight smile Zell's antics caused.

"She's probably in her office!" Quistis called out to him as he ran off.

"That leaves us to restore order," Tobias stated.

"Not quite," Quistis said, "we're stealing Nichole away as well. She'll be the final member of the Command Team."

Anne bounced a little in her seat. "Oh! Congratulations!" she squealed.

"Uh… thanks," Nichole replied, looking a little lost. "What do you need me to do?"

"Nothing much," Quistis answered, then her face twisted into a freakish mask, "we just want your braaaiins," she exclaimed in a horrible impression of a zombie.

Nichole laughed, her previous discomfort forgotten as she joined them.

"We need to head to the bridge," Squall said. "I suppose I have an announcement to make."

Quistis nodded. "We'll bring her back in one piece," she reassured the others before dragging Nichole off to the elevator.

"Didn't know you had it in you, Instructor," Squall whispered to Quistis when they were inside. She smiled mysteriously but didn't answer, and Squall was left feeling like maybe he really didn't know her at all.

Rinoa had always said that it was a weakness to close himself off to the point that he didn't know the people he worked with—those he called friends. A weakness he'd have to correct. He couldn't afford any more flaws, and maybe Rinoa was right. Maybe this whole getting to know people thing was better than being alone.

When they arrived in the Headmaster's office, the solid metal pillar that held up the bridge was once more jutting up through the floor. Cid was still at his desk, slightly behind the pillar but mostly visible. He waved them on, barely lifting his head from his work.

Nida was working diligently, calibrating the helm and making sure that everything was in order when the lift brought Squall's party to the top.

"Almost ready here, Commander. I'm waiting to start her up until we have everyone aboard. Don't want any accidents with the power ring."

Squall nodded. That would definitely be for the best. The first time Garden had gone mobile, everyone outside of the main structure were left behind. Those not killed by the power ring had been by the missiles. They had been Balamb's first true casualties of the war. Now, since they had the time to make sure of it, they would see that no one else suffered the same fate.

"The comm is ready for you," Nida announced. "I'll start her up when you're through."

He wanted to put it off, but knew that he couldn't, so he simply nodded and went to the device. The chimes played and suddenly he was on the spot, yet again, with truly no idea of what he should say. Then, like every other time, the words came.

"Everyone… This is your Commander, Squall. This is an emergency, so please listen carefully. This afternoon, a new president has come to power in Galbadia. She has claimed that SeeD murdered the previous President in cold blood. We are sure that this is not the case. SeeD had nothing to do with his death, and we will be working tirelessly to prove it.

"As some of you may already know, President Hart has issued an ultimatum to Garden… to us. We have been ordered to surrender. To lay down our lives and be tried as criminals or risk Galbadia declaring war… War, not only with us, but with all who associate with us.

"The Garden Committee has ruled that we won't give in, we won't give up, and we will not surrender. Steps are being taken to assure the safety of all those who support us at this time, the first of which is to get our Garden mobile. We'll be asking you all to make a stand, to fight for your Garden, for our way of life.

"Garden will be departing in ten minutes. Please see to it that everyone is within the safety markers before that time. We'll be docking in Fisherman's Horizon at 22:00 hours to receive those who were on leave and pick up supplies. Please contact a staff member if you have any questions. That is all…"

His throat felt raw as he turned off the comm, but he was satisfied with what he'd said. He just hoped it was enough to keep the residents from panicking. He was almost glad the majority of Garden's occupants were on leave. As much as it complicated matters, it also made it that much simpler to keep the panic under control.

"Nida, start her up in exactly ten," he said before turning to Nichole and Quistis. "Let's go see what Xu has come up with."

"It was a good speech," Nichole told him, while they rode the lift down, "very moving."

"You should have heard him when Galbadia and Balamb Gardens were fighting," Quistis said, grinning.

Squall glared at her halfheartedly, which just made her laugh.

"Squall, a word," Cid called out, and sighing, Squall went over to him.

"I just wanted to inform you that I've finished looking into the new President's claim. As I had thought, no one was informed of a contract for Baron Hart and there weren't any SeeDs in Deling City at the time of the President's assassination."

"I knew it was fabricated!" Quistis exclaimed. "Will we be able to prove it?"

"Yes." Cid nodded. "If I can get in touch with the Galbadian cabinet, I should be able to prove it sufficiently. The problem is, I haven't been able to get through to anyone. It's all the same message: they are refusing to talk to terrorists."

Quistis frowned. "Then we'll have no choice but to fight."

"No," Squall interjected. He was in charge now, and he was not going to let this become the massacre they'd faced with Galbadia Garden. "We won't fight until we have no choice. I don't care if they think we're cowards, I won't have this be like the last time, when we were forced into action without a plan and with all the junior classmen sitting around."

"On that end," Cid said, changing the subject, "I've contacted Galbadia and Trabia Gardens, and both are very pleased with your plans. Galbadia is happy to host whomever we send, and are working on plans to convert into a mobile refugee camp for the interim. Trabia is focusing on repairs, but will take any able bodied workers we can afford to send. The Committee is proud of your thoughtfulness on the matter."

Squall shook his head in dismissal. It wasn't anything special. He could see the situation getting very ugly very fast, when Galbadia realized they couldn't touch the actual Gardens. His people wouldn't be at their best if they were worrying about those they left behind.

"Oh good, I'm glad I found you, Squall," Xu said, coming in from behind them. "Am I interrupting?"

"No, no," Cid assured her, "he's all yours; I've got to get back on the horn. Let me know if you need anything else."

Squall nodded, turning to look expectantly at Xu. "I have the preliminary reports," she explained. "Out of the sixty SeeD called back to active duty, fifty have relayed their intent to join with Garden, five are currently unreachable, three have requested an honorable discharge, and two are contracted out to Trabia Garden."

"How many of them will meet us at FH?" he asked.

"Twenty-five of the fifty will make the 22:00 deadline. With no delays, we should have everyone on board by 24:00, which will give us a few hours to load supplies while we wait. Zell is already en-route for his first pick-ups. I've got them grouped together to await retrieval."

"Good. The numbers are better than expected," Quistis said.

Xu nodded. "More of them were willing to come back when they were informed that there were plans to see that their families would be safe. Dr. Kadowaki came to let me know about your idea, Squall. It's pure brilliance."

Squall nodded absently. It was nothing less than what he'd hoped for. "Keep trying on the five you couldn't reach. Give them forty-eight hours before changing their status to MIA. I want you to collaborate with Dr. Kadowaki, and as soon as Zell gets back, I want him out again. I also want a team of six SeeDs with him at all times. I don't want to take any chances when we pick people up. Seifer Almasy, Anne Sprite, Gavin Mortis, and Tobias Skye will be good choices; you'll have to pull up files for the other two."

"Right away," Xu agreed, saluting.

Squall sighed as he watched her rush off. What needed to be done next?

Ding, Ding, Dong… "Everyone… this is Nida, your pilot. This is not a drill; please proceed quickly and orderly to the safety zone. I repeat, this is not a drill. This is your last warning. Proceed quickly and orderly to the safety zone. Garden will be mobile shortly."

The Garden jolted under Squall's feet and he rode the movement with ease, reaching out to steady Nichole as the massive engine housed within Garden's bowels started with a clanging of machinery.

A minute later the yellow and blue spiked ring that floated over Balamb's hull like a halo extended, flashing with a bright burst of magic as it slid down over the windows, leaving a glimmer of its protective energy clinging to every surface.

Squall held on as the Garden swayed and warped into the ship that had saved them all once before. He had faith that it would do so again. As the setting sun illuminated their path, he prayed that one day he would see the Garden return again to the Alcaud Plains of Balamb, to the place they called home.

-oooOooo-

**AN**: The plot thickens…

Thanks to Kimmae and all of her wonderful beta skills.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

And deep inside you will bleed for me

_Balamb Garden, Nortes Mountains, Esthar, October 7, 082 ALC, 10:16 Hours_

From the moment the Garden had arrived at Fisherman's Horizon they'd been off and running with barely a moment's pause.

Galbadia had given no quarter to those left behind. When they realized that they couldn't touch the Gardens themselves, anyone that could be said to have ties with them were rounded up and thrown into the D-District Prison to await 'trial'.

After the first death due to those 'trials' went public, Zell hadn't been able to keep up with the demands for refuge. Balamb Garden had broken out the utility submarines, staffing them with SeeD teams just to try and keep up. The original plan had been to take all of the refugees directly to Galbadia or Trabia, but with such a large influx of people they'd had to make do with simply getting them all to the nearest Garden and sorting them out there.

It was at this point that two things happened. The first was that Esthar had contacted them, offering all three of the Gardens sanctuary within its borders. The offer had been considered heavily and then politely declined. They could make it work; having a home base wasn't worth bringing war to Esthar.

The second was that Nichole was given the task of finding room within the Gardens for all those seeking refuge from the SeeD Crusade. It was an overwhelming mission, made even more so because she had no one available to help her. Quistis was occupied keeping Garden's residents calm and orderly and making sure that they got what they needed. Xu worked non-stop to find enough supplies to keep them all afloat and Zell was practically chained to the Ragnarok's cockpit, along with the rest of the gang who acted as his bodyguards. Squall was probably the busiest of them all, performing his regular duties, while heading up an effort to form an army from the masses. Which left her, with more responsibility than she thought she could handle. She'd thought that there was a general plan in the works but it had been shot to pieces with the huge influx of refugees.

When Squall had agreed to take on everyone who wished for asylum, Nichole was positive he hadn't known just how many people that would mean. Balamb Garden alone had over a hundred and fifty students, not to mention the seventy-some-odd SeeDs, and the thirty-or-so staff members. Add in all of their families and the various odds and ends to the mix and you were talking four times that; almost the population of Balamb Continent, right there in one floating ship.

With nothing solidified on the plans to house everyone, Nichole had started at the beginning. At her request, Headmaster Cid had arranged for Galbadia and Balamb Gardens to rendezvous off of Centra's Shamal Peninsula. There, she'd spent over a week overseeing Galbadia Garden's conversion into a floating refugee city. All of the space Galbadia had to offer, from its classrooms to its MD level, had been stripped down to the bones before being resupplied to accommodate as many people as possible. When it was finished, the Garden—which had been designed for a living capacity of three hundred and fifty—had room to house over a thousand individuals.

Almost everyone had volunteered to help in whatever way they could as payment for the shelter Garden provided them. Everything was remarkably organized; everyone was fed, everyone clothed, and the majority of the work was done by volunteers.

There was some discontent of course but it was nothing that the Garden staff weren't able to control, especially once Squall gave the belly achers an outlet for their energy: he'd decreed that anyone willing to fight for Garden would be accepted into a militia army and combat trained.

It was a good idea, but Nichole hadn't been happy with it or him; after she'd just spent the better part of two weeks finding housing for everyone, he'd insisted that only those in the army be housed within Balamb's walls. She'd thrown up her hands, turned and walked out on him—it was that or give into her first impulse and leap across his desk to strangle him. After a couple of hours spent venting at Gavin, Nichole had eventually calmed enough to see the logic in the maneuver and start the work of reorganizing.

She still might have resented Squall for it, had he not been just as busy as she was. He severely underestimated the interest in the army. Every single student from both Galbadia and Balamb Gardens signed up, as well as over eight hundred refugees. The showing had been so huge that after getting everyone settled in, yet again, Squall had commandeered her to help him sort through them all.

Between the two of them, the members of the SeeD Army (as it had begun to be called) were split into squads of fifteen to twenty, assigned a SeeD squadron leader, and given a practice schedule.

Things had settled for a little bit, at least until Galbadia Garden had broken off, floating away with the non-combatants.

Cramped was an understatement for Balamb in those days. It felt like there were people coming out of the woodwork. Thankfully, it wasn't long before Trabia Garden was mobile and joined them on the outskirts of the Island Closest to Heaven.

It wasn't a moment too soon. Just a few hours after Trabia started their engines, Balamb received word that Galbadia's missile base had become operational. An hour after that it was reported that an attack had been launched for Trabia Crater—where Trabia Garden had previously resided.

Celebrating their narrow escape, the residents of Trabia were all too happy to be sorted into those who wanted to fight and those who didn't. The latter were sent to Galbadia Garden, while the former stayed behind.

Once Squall had the final count on combatants, the entirety of the SeeD army was split into two halves with half housed at Balamb and the rest housed at Trabia. It had given them all room to breathe, lifting morale to the highest it had been since they first started running. Sleeping arrangements became a breeze. Some of the dorms were rather stuffed, but with finagling, everybody had fit, leaving more room for training and other recreational activities.

After two months of planning and training for war, the Galbadian Government had finally made an offer: they were willing to negotiate. It was such an unlikely maneuver that Nichole had been sure it was a trap of some sort. Squall had arrived at the same conclusion and refused to consider the proposition.

After a week of arguments, Cid and the Garden Committee had worn him down. As much as they understood the Commander's reasoning, they couldn't fund this venture indefinitely. Tuition was not being billed while classes weren't in session and funds weren't flowing in from SeeD contracts, because no one was desperate enough to hire those Galbadia labeled as terrorists. Their only income came from the fees for room and board, which wasn't enough to cover even half the costs of the refugees. Gil was tight.

Squall had been forced to relent, but only to the point of agreeing to meet with the Galbadian delegates on his terms. He wasn't going to give Galbadia any chances to use the talks as a trick to capture the Gardens. It was decided that the talks would be held at the Presidential Palace of Esthar City with President Loire himself mediating.

Thus, with the President's permission, Balamb Garden had touched land for the first time since the SeeD Crusade began. The Garden had stuck to the Nortes Mountains, a region just outside of Esthar City. The plan was to stay there while those attending the meeting were shuttled to the Palace by the Ragnarok.

-oooOooo-

As part of the Command team, it was expected that Nichole would be attending the meeting. It was perhaps the last thing she wanted to do, but there was no getting out of it. Squall had made his ruling and she'd just have to go along.

Almost immediately after informing her of that, he'd been called away for a last minute meeting of the Garden Committee—probably to decide what terms they could and couldn't agree to—and she was left to her own devices, with nothing pressing to attend to for the first time in ages. She had found herself on the bridge contemplating the view.

The high-tech city gleamed brightly in the morning light; a dazzling glass gem amongst the dull red sands of the plain. Huge and sprawling, the crystal city was as much a highly defensible fortress as it was a work of art. After months of nothing but the deep blue sea, Nichole was ready to call it the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

Deciding she'd seen enough of Esthar City for the time being, she turned on her heel and left the bridge, heading for the Cafeteria to get her and Anne some lunch. Anne had been sick for over a week now, often heaving three or four times a day, so Nichole had made it her mission to make sure she kept up with her fluids.

Nichole was glad that Quistis had agreed to let her and Anne move in during the space crunch. It had made it possible to actually see her friends, and now it made it convenient to keep track of Anne's health. It seemed the only time she saw anyone besides Squall and the Headmaster was when they passed each other in the dorms.

"What'll it be?" the woman behind the counter asked impatiently.

Nichole jumped. She'd been on autopilot and hadn't even realized she'd arrived. "Um, a turkey club and two bowls of today's soup, please."

The woman nodded, slipping Nichole an electronic pad where she punched in her ID code before moving down the counter-line to pick up her order.

By chance, she spotted Adrian heading towards her.

After the group had finished their stint on the Ragnarok, they (along with the rest of the unoccupied SeeDs) had been assigned their own squads of the SeeD Army to train. Which made it so that Nichole had only seen Gavin a few times, as his squad training schedule was almost directly opposite of her own work schedule, and she hadn't seen hide nor hair of Tobias or Adrian the entire time they'd been at sea.

Nichole had heard from Anne that Adrian was spending nearly all of his time in the Infirmary on his assignment of training the SeeD Army Medics. She was only partially surprised to note that she was really happy to see him.

"Adrian," she called out, when he was close enough to hear her.

He looked up, a brief flash of surprise crossing his features, before they smoothed into a look of indifference.

Her stomach sunk like deadweight. _Why was he so confusing?_ One moment he was regarding her affectionately—even if it was just playing with her hair—and the next he was acting like he might ignore her. Men… or maybe it was just him. She didn't think Gavin was so infuriating, and Tobias might be a pompous ass sometimes, but at least you knew where you stood with him.

"Healer Sprite, a word, please," she tried, hoping that it would be enough to assure him she wasn't after chitchat, or Hyne forbid, wanted to talk about their rather laughable 'relationship'.

"What can I do for you?" he asked, relaxing noticeably.

Nichole had the sudden urge to scream. There she'd been, all stupidly happy to see him, and he was relieved when it was just business. The Jerk!

"It's Anne," she bit out, motioning for him to follow her—she didn't have much time—"she still has that stomach bug. She threw up three times this morning. It's been over a week now and she doesn't seem to be getting any better."

"She should have been over it by now. I have some time free, where is she?" he asked.

"She's still in our room, as far as I know. I try to make sure she gets at least one meal a day, but her squad trains in the evening, so who knows if she gets another."

"She's still leading her squad?"

Nichole nodded. "I tried to talk her out of it, but she says she doesn't do much, just shows them a move and then watches them do it. She talked me out of the Infirmary too, but I'm starting to really worry…"

She punched in the code on the key pad beside the door and entered the dorm. Adrian followed her as she set the meal down on the small counter in the living area before entering the bedroom.

Anne was where Nichole had left her, curled up in bed. Crossing to the window, Nichole opened the blinds a bit, letting the bright morning light into the room.

"Can't a girl die in peace?" Anne groaned, throwing an arm up over her eyes.

Nichole grinned. "Not today, love. Adrian's come to look at you."

Anne peeked one eye out from under her arm. "He can look all he wants, but I draw the line at stripping."

"Can't be that sick if you're still making wisecracks," Adrian muttered.

"Want me to decorate your shoes to prove it?" Anne asked, looking somewhat green.

"Not especially," he conceded. "You should have said something to the medic on your squad. She's completely capable of treating a little stomach bug."

"I didn't want to disturb her," Anne admitted, sheepishly. "I know they're working the healing staff double time. I thought it would just go away. If it makes you feel any better, I'd already decided to ask you about it tomorrow, if it wasn't gone."

Adrian looked skeptical, but didn't comment, choosing instead to just cast the Scan on her and be done with it. His features morphed from skepticism to concern as he cast the spell again, double checking what he'd seen.

"What is it?" Nichole asked, more worried than ever. "Is it serious?"

Adrian shook his head. "No. Well, at least not in the deathbed sense. She's pregnant."

Nichole's hand went to her mouth in shock as Anne's eyes widened in disbelief. "WHAT!?" Anne screamed.

"Two sets of stats." Adrian ran a hand over his face. "It's conclusive, you're expecting. Approximately two and a half months along if I'm reading this thing right—you know I don't do women's issues, and pregnancy kinda falls under that. You'll have to see the doctor for all that prenatal stuff."

Anne shook her head. "I can't be pregnant. I got those damn contraceptive shots just like every other SeeD."

"It should have worked, but magic doesn't lie. Maybe the drug just isn't effective for you, or it burnt through your system faster," Adrian supplied. "Either way, that's your nausea problem. I'm sure there's something in the Infirmary that can take care of that. You'll need supplements and stuff as well, if you decide to keep it, but like I said, you're better off going to the doc for that stuff."

Nichole wanted to ask why he would even suggest such a thing as not keeping it, but then remembered that they were SeeD, elite mercenary forces. Children didn't really fit into the scenario. There was nothing in the code strictly against it, but there _was_ a reason every SeeD was required to have birth control injections.

Anne seemed a little lost, and Nichole's heart went out to her. She had no idea what she would decide if the tables were turned.

"Is there anything else I need to know?"

Adrian shrugged. "Take it easy; miscarriage is common with excessive injury."

"Don't play rough with the boys, got it."

"Did you need me to get Gavin some time off to talk?" Nichole asked.

Anne shook her head. "He's supposed to meet me here tonight. I just hope it sinks in before I have to tell him."

"Just make sure you have him sit down first," Nichole ribbed.

"Yeah..." Anne agreed absently.

"You should eat something," Adrian said.

Anne scrunched up her face in disgust at the mention of food.

Nichole smiled. "I brought some soup, but there's a club sandwich there as well if you'd rather."

"No… no, the soup will be fine," Anne assured. "Would you bring it in to me?"

"Sure."

"I'll go get something for your stomach. It should help until you can see the doctor." Adrian sighed.

"Thanks."

Nichole followed Adrian into the living room. "Adrian, wait…" she called.

He turned, almost to the door. "What?"

"Thanks for coming to see her. I never imagined… Anyway, I know you're missing your lunch for this, did you want the sandwich? I can pick the bacon off," she teased.

He grinned at her little dig. She and Anne had once replaced an entire mission's rations with various bacon-filled treats, knowing that he couldn't stand the stuff. It had been one of the few times that Nichole had actually turned the tables on him.

"Sure," he said, "thanks."

Nichole went to the counter to collect it. He took the opportunity to move in behind her, effectively cutting her off so that when she turned she either had to step back into the counter or run into him.

"Here," she said, handing him the sandwich, wondering why he'd gotten so close. He started to take it from her and then apparently changed his mind, snatching her hand instead. She froze in surprise at the contact. His eyes burned into hers as he opened his mouth to say something.

Ding, Ding, Dong… "SeeD Nichole Skye, please report immediately to the hangar," a voice she didn't recognize called out over the PA.

She cursed silently at the horrible timing as Adrian dropped her hand like it was fire, plucking his prize easily from her limp fingers before stepping away.

"Uh, thanks," he said. Then he was gone, the door sliding shut behind him.

Saying a few choice words under her breath about men and their general stupidity, she snatched the soup off the counter and took it into the bedroom.

"See," Anne said, looking like the cat that ate the canary, "I told you he was a chicken."

"Spying, were we?" Nichole scowled, shoving the soup at her.

"Of course," Anne replied shamelessly, "I was hoping you'd offer him your lunch. You guys are so cute!"

Nichole shook her head, biting her tongue. It wasn't Anne's fault that the world just didn't like her today. "As you heard, I have to go. I'll see you later."

Anne was already digging in. "Later, girl…"

Nichole made it to the hangar in record time, pure frustration driving her. The Ragnarok was running and the area clear as she hurried onboard. Squall waited for her in the cockpit with Quistis, Xu, and Headmaster Cid. Zell was bouncing impatiently in the pilot's seat.

She sat next to Squall with a sigh. It seemed Cid had gotten his way after all. None of them had wanted him to attend the meetings but Cid had insisted, overruling their concern.

With a roar of engines, the Ragnarok sped out of the hangar and into the sky.

"How's Anne?" Quistis asked quietly from behind her.

Nichole shook her head; it wasn't her place to announce the news. "I'll tell you later."

The trip was short and uneventful, the only interruption to the silence being the radio contact instructing Zell where to land. Two guards dressed in a slightly darker version of the Estharian soldier's uniform met them as they disembarked.

"Welcome to Esthar," the first greeted.

"President Loire would like to extend his hospitality to the SeeD delegates. There will be refreshments provided while you wait for the meeting to begin," the second added before guiding them into the palace.

The first brought up the rear as they left the courtyard. Nichole heard the roar of the Ragnarok as it took off. Zell would fly back to Garden and wait there for the meeting to be over.

The inside of the Presidential Palace was gorgeous. Everything gleamed in the light as the guards led them down hallway after hallway to a small reception room. The room was sparsely decorated, allowing the amazing architecture to become the focal point.

"The meeting is set to begin in half an hour. Please stay here, we will retrieve you when it is time," the first guard instructed. "The President humbly requests the presence of Squall Leonhart."

Squall jumped a little and Nichole had to hold back a laugh at the panic in his eyes.

"I'm Squall," he managed, with only a hint of a squeak to his voice. She held back a cry of surprise as he grabbed her arm, whispering, "_Stick__ with me_," before pulling her after him.

She nodded slightly, confused, but not willing to make a scene.

"The invitation was for one," the guard pointed out.

"I don't go anywhere without a bodyguard," Squall replied.

Nichole blinked at his blatant lie, wondering what was going on as the guard looked her over, measuring her. She couldn't tell if he found her lacking; his tone was very neutral as he said, "Very well, follow me."

Three turns and a hallway later they came to a stop before a door guarded by two very intimidating men. "The President will see you now," the man on the left said, opening the door. The guard that had led them there bowed before taking his leave. Squall looked back at her before entering, as if to reassure himself that she was still there.

Nichole was beginning to have an inkling of why he was so shaken up, and her thoughts were confirmed as she saw President Loire for the first time. She'd thought the name sounded familiar—she'd only seen it once, over a decade ago, when she'd gotten a look at Squall's birth papers, but it was a rather unique name… Laguna Loire… Squall's father. They weren't quite spitting images, she thought, but there was a very definite resemblance.

"You requested my presence?" Squall asked, his manner cool and collected, contrary to the anxiety she knew he was feeling.

"Uh, yeah." Laguna nodded, his hand going to the back of his head in obvious embarrassment. "I was hoping you'd be alone."

"Whatever you need to say can be said with her present," Squall deadpanned.

"Uh, okay," Laguna agreed reluctantly, as a stiffened look of pain crossed his face. "I guess there's no easy way to say this, so, Squall, you're my son."

Squall nodded, crossing his arms. "I know," he said indifferently.

Nichole fought back the urge to slap him as poor Laguna looked dumbstruck. The man had made a big, probably painful revelation, and all the insensitive ass could say is 'I know?'

"Okay, then," Laguna said finally, "I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am... that I wasn't there for you.

"Is that all?" Squall asked.

Laguna nodded, obviously unsure of what else to say.

"Then I'll get back to the waiting room. Thanks for your hospitality, President Loire." Squall turned on his heel, walking from the room.

She froze, panicking as she watched the door close behind him. Now what was she supposed to do?

"Man, I blew it!" Laguna cried, as he clutched his right leg.

Her heart went out to him. He hadn't blown it, Squall had just been Squall. "You did fine," she reassured him. "Squall will process things in his own time."

Laguna looked at her in shock. "I'm sorry, I forgot you were there."

She smiled a little. "I figured," she said more to herself than to him, wondering why the hell she _was_ still there. Squall shouldn't have brought her and he definitely shouldn't have just walked out on her. Commander or not, she was going to chew him a new one. "I'm sorry he brought me," she added, feeling it was only right, "I know you wanted this to be private."

"It's okay," Laguna said, waving her apology off, "I'm sure he must trust you a lot if he wanted you here. You seem to know him well."

She nodded. "He didn't introduce me. I'm Nichole Skye… I guess you could say I'm your niece. Squall and I are cousins on his mother's side."

Laguna looked thoughtful. "That would explain it." He nodded. "I knew Raine had sisters, but they weren't around when I met her, and then she heard that they'd died."

"My mother passed away within a year of our birth. My twin brother and I, I mean. I'm almost a year and a half older than Squall, not that it feels that way most of the time."

Laguna laughed. "Yeah, he seems to have the maturity thing down. Much more that I did at that age—heck, even now."

She sighed quietly. "Mature or not, I'm sorry for his reaction."

"There's nothing to be sorry for, if you're sure I didn't blow it." He looked at her hopefully.

She smiled. "I'm sure."

Honestly, she couldn't begin to guess what Squall was thinking, but she doubted Laguna telling him information he already knew had blown anything.

"Then it's fine. I hope eventually he'll be able to forgive me." A clock chimed on his desk and he sighed. "Well, it was lovely meeting you, Nichole. I look forward to talking to you more when this business with Galbadia is cleared up."

"Thanks," she said, before her diplomatic training kicked in and she added, "Garden extends its gratitude for hosting us and the meeting. We appreciate what Esthar has done for us and thank you, President Loire, for your time."

He grinned. "No problem. You should head back to the reception room; the meeting will begin soon."

She nodded, turned, and left. The guards shot her curious looks as she passed, but no one stopped her as she made her way back to where the others waited. Quistis, Xu, and the Headmaster were sitting on the couch, chatting amicably when she arrived. Squall sat in a wing backed chair in the far corner, his face buried in his hands.

Her heart wrenched a little for him and all thoughts of telling him off went out the window. It was obviously affecting him more than he'd let on. It was so typical of him. She went to him, sitting on the edge of the chair next to his. "Want to talk about it?" He glared at her through his fingers. She smiled lightly. "I figured. I wonder why he decided to tell you now?"

"Who knows?" He shrugged. "He certainly had better opportunities."

"I know the timing and the delivery weren't the best, but your response was kinda harsh," she pointed out.

"What would you have said?"

She shrugged. "I don't know… I just feel for him a little. Just as I feel for you. He may not be hurting as much, but you can tell he feels horrible. I wouldn't be surprised if the main reason he's doing this is for you."

Squall closed his eyes, slumping. "I've wondered. It's why I didn't want to accept his offer. If this ends up as the war we think it will, I don't want him to drag the people of Esthar into it over me."

"That's not what I meant," Nichole explained. "If the people of Esthar get into this war it will be of their own choosing. Laguna's reason may be you, but that doesn't make it your responsibility. We all make our own choices."

"Maybe," he acquiesced.

She knew it was as good as she was going to get from him so she dropped it, accepting the silence until the second guard from earlier entered. "It's time. I'll lead you to the council chambers. President Laguna and his aides are waiting, the Galbadian delegates will enter after you are seated. Right this way, please," he said before leading them to the room.

Inside, a massive glass table filled the center of the space, spanning its length. Twenty leather chairs surrounded it, with two more on either end. Laguna sat at the head, surrounded by two men. One was gigantic and beefy looking, even under the robes he wore, and the other dark-skinned and lanky. They were led down the side where the smaller aide sat, and Squall took the seat a chair away from him.

"Kiros…" Squall said, acknowledging the man who nodded back, "and Ward," Squall added, nodding to the burly man as the Galbadians were led in.

Nichole noted with relief that Valora wasn't with them. She hadn't really expected the angel to attend, but had been fretting about it nonetheless. Instead, General Caraway seemed to be leading the party of two unknown men. Once they were seated, Laguna cleared his throat and the meeting began.

-oooOooo-

Six hours, two breaks, and countless arguments later, Nichole was ready to tear her hair out.

She swore that if she looked up stubborn in the dictionary, she'd find pictures of all three Galbadian delegates. They ignored every attempt to reason with them, wanting nothing less than the total surrender of all Gardens to Galbadia. Some part of her had known that speaking with them would be futile; she just hadn't realized how utterly maddening it would be.

General Caraway seemed rather uneager to be involved, even bored by the proceedings. He'd said very little, only paying attention enough to send Squall death-glares any time he opened his mouth. The other two, however, were very outspoken. Skirl, a short, balding man, was the most talkative. Geoff, a pudgy man with short brown hair, seemed only to be there to provide an agreeing voice for the other two.

The outcome continued to be the same: Garden would not surrender. Laguna had made it clear that Esthar didn't want the surrender of the Gardens to Galbadia any more than they themselves did.

Tempers had once again seen the fraying point before Laguna had called for another short recess and they were escorted back to the reception area. Nichole picked up some of the refreshments offered before joining Xu and Quistis.

"They're like robots with only one setting," Xu complained. "I wish I had one of those universal remotes so we could mute them."

Quistis laughed, and Nichole smirked. The delegates did seem rather programmed on what they could and couldn't say. The whole thing seemed pointless—neither side was going to budge, so why were they there? Nichole had had a bad feeling about this meeting from the start, and it was only growing more insistent as time moved on.

She left Quistis and Xu to their venting, heading over to Squall's corner. "I don't like this," she declared as she sat next to him. "It stinks of something… I'm not sure what, but I don't like it."

Squall nodded. "I agree. I've ordered the Gardens on full alert. Zell is back in the Ragnarok. I've told him to do a few flyovers just to be cautious."

"I'm sure Laguna's—President Loire's—" she corrected at his sharp look, "security is the best and all, but I'd feel better if we'd gone against the truce and placed our own among the Estharians."

"It's too late now." Squall sighed.

A guard stepped through the door. "We are ready to begin again, if you would follow me."

The Galbadians were already present and seated when they arrived. "Welcome back, all," Laguna greeted. "Let's start the discussion where we left off. Galbadia, you have the floor."

General Caraway nodded. "Thank you, President Loire." He turned towards the SeeD party. "We're here to negotiate the terms of Garden's surrender. If we can't come to an agreement, I'm afraid that the soldiers stationed outside the Gardens will have to take them by force. We're here simply to prevent unnecessary bloodshed."

Squall shook his head, but remained silent. Nichole could feel the tension radiating off of him. It was a trap, just as they'd thought. There was nothing they could do about it, though. The Garden was on alert; they could hold their own against the Galbadians, at least until they could run away.

"As I've said before," Headmaster Cid said, "we cannot surrender the Gardens. We are not guilty of the crimes we're accused of, and would be happy to prove it in a World Summit."

Skirl smirked. "You would do well to consider our offer _very carefully_. We wouldn't want there to be any _unfortunate_ losses."

Nichole shivered. Something wasn't right. They were too smug, too conceited. Garden had eluded them successfully for months and yet they sat there, acting like they had all of their eggs in one basket. She tugged on Squall's sleeve under the table, warning bells ringing in her ears.

"Your offer bears no consideration. I don't see the point of this meeting, gentlemen." Cid stood abruptly. "Until you are ready to talk of a fair trial in front of the World Summit, I have nothing more to say to you."

Geoff sighed. "I'm sorry it must come to this."

Everything in her screamed that something was wrong, something was going terribly wrong. Then like a canon blast, a shot rang out. Panic clawed in her throat, at her heart as she shoved Squall from his seat and to the floor.

Power burned inside of her, welling up until she had no choice but to release it, shielding Squall and herself in a blaze of silver-red light.

She searched the room for the source of the shot and the target. Laguna sat on the floor, seemingly uninjured, Kiros and Ward standing in defensive positions before him. The Galbadians were exactly as they'd been; the General looked rather shell-shocked, but the others looked smug.

The bastards planned it, she realized, as she turned to her own team. Squall rose to his feet, uninjured, staring at her with questions that she couldn't answer, and they turned to see how the others had fared.

Quistis and Xu had covered Cid when the shot rang out, and both were untangling themselves. Nichole noticed a dark stain of blood on Quistis' gold bordered lapel, and rushed over to her.

"You've been hit," she said, taking her by the arm, searching frantically for the wound.

Quistis shook her head, gazing down at her chest. "Not me…"

Unable to find a wound, she agreed with her, "No, not you… Who?" she asked, searching the others.

Xu sat shakily on the ground, but the Headmaster… Headmaster Cid hadn't moved.

"Shit." Nichole dropped to her knees beside him, Quistis following her in an instant as they worked together to turn him over. His eyes were glazed, his kindly face contorted in anguish. He was still breathing, but they were shallow, rasping breaths. She searched his body for the wound.

There… in the upper quadrant of his chest sat the bullet hole. She tore open his red vest and the white shirt underneath, pressing down on the wound to stop the bleeding.

Quistis swept the hair from his forehead, speaking to him in low tones, trying to keep him alert and with them. Nichole tuned her out, stripping her uniform jacket off and bunching it up to use as a compress.

She wanted to cry, wanted to scream, as she searched madly for the power that had been hers seconds before. If she could just find it, maybe she could do something, anything. The magic refused to come and without it she knew there was nothing more she could do.

Cid coughed, bright crimson spurts of blood staining his lips as he tried to speak. Tears ran freely down Quistis' cheeks as she talked to him, making him focus on her every time his eyes clouded and it seemed he would shut them.

Small feminine hands covered Nichole's own red-stained ones and she looked up dazedly into kind green eyes. "Let me take over for now," the woman in the pale green Healer robes said. Nichole nodded dumbly, letting the woman transfer pressure before rising to her feet.

She turned her back on the scene, choking back tears of hopelessness. She couldn't bear to watch. She looked to the others in the room, trying to distract herself from the grief, pulling what little composure she had left around her like a shield. The room was eerily quiet, the silence filled only by Quistis' low, desperate, heart-wrenching pleading, and the wet rattling sounds of the Headmaster's breathing.

Laguna was upright, surrounded by a half dozen guards in their dark periwinkle uniforms, talking in whispers to a serious looking older man in a darker purple uniform. Kiros and Ward stood flanking him, each surrounded by their own smaller contingencies of guards, watching the efforts to save Cid with saddened gazes.

The Galbadians were still sitting as they had been. The General looked shocked, and full of sorrow. Geoff looked on the situation with pity in his beady eyes, but it was Skirl who held her attention. He looked down on the Headmaster, a pleased smile on his ugly face. Suddenly his eyes met hers across the table and—his grin never faltering—winked at her.

Until that moment she hadn't known it was possible to literally see red. Her vision clouded with it, as the power—the power that had been so elusive before—surged within her. She only had to think about it, reaching with her power to yank the man out of his chair, hanging him in mid air by his throat. He dangled above the table, struggling, clawing at invisible hands.

The rage burned within her as she squeezed harder, her empty hand mimicking the movement in the air before her. She watched in satisfaction as his eyes bugged out from the pressure and he turned red, then purple in his efforts to breathe.

She was surrounded in the blink of an eye, but the shield she'd cast earlier—and had maintained without thought—kept the guards from getting close, and their physical attempts at subduing her rebounded with flashes of silver-red light.

Smiling, she twisted her arm, increasing the pressure just a fraction more, grinning as the man turned blue, struggling wildly now in terror. _He's not so smug now_, she thought with satisfaction, _not when it's him the life is draining from_.

Her vision of Skirl cut off abruptly as Squall—smart enough to stay out of range of her shield—stepped into her line of sight, his eyes fixed on her. The awe she saw in them was humbling, but the fear… the fear was devastating.

She looked away in shame, realizing finally just what she'd done—what she was doing. The power receded, but this time it stayed with her. She could feel it pulsing just beneath the surface, ready to leap to her aide if she called upon it again. She dropped her hand, watching as Skirl plummeted to the floor, unconscious.

The satisfaction in Squall's eyes at that moment was worth whatever trouble she was in. He stepped closer to her, cautiously, and she concentrated on letting him past her shield, sighing in relief when he touched her without being pushed back.

"Nichi." He sighed, grief raw in his voice. "Cid died."

She nodded, taking the hand he offered, staring for a moment at the blood already drying on her skin. "I know," she said, leaning her head on his shoulder as tears burned her eyes. He put his arm around her, to comfort her or himself, she wasn't sure; while the guards, seeing she was no longer a threat, settled for surrounding her.

She dropped her shield entirely, half-expecting to be taken into custody immediately. Instead, the guards simply ignored her until a man's rich baritone voice called out, "At ease."

The circle of men parted, allowing the man in the darker purple uniform to step through. His hazel eyes were serious but not unkind as they focused on her. Laguna followed behind him, his face lined with sorrow.

"Squall, I'm so sorry," he said, then shook his head gesturing to the man beside him. "This is Hagar Instrone, he's the head of Palace security."

The other man nodded shortly. "I'm sorry for your loss. I want you to know that I have everyone working to find out who did this and how they got past the extensive measures we took to ensure this meeting went smoothly."

Squall nodded politely but she could feel him tense with anger. "I'd like to know that myself," he bit out. "I was ensured that our safety would be top priority. I agreed—against my better judgment—to leave our weapons and magic behind. I agreed—unwillingly—to leave the tactical and defensive decisions to you and your team. Because of this, our Headmaster is dead. What do you have to say? What am I supposed to tell his wife?"

Laguna looked ready to break down on the spot, but Hagar didn't flinch. "When we've found the answers, you'll be the first to know, Commander Leonhart. We took every precaution here today. Speaking of the agreement to leave all of your weaponry behind, I'm forced to question why you thought bringing a Sorceress would be appropriate."

_Sorceress?_ she wondered, as he stared pointedly at her. Technically speaking, she did have the blood of the Sorceresses running through her, but… then it struck her… Rinoa… Oh, Hyne, she'd forgotten entirely about the transfer that had taken place that day, about the burden. She'd been so caught up on simply trying to survive that she'd completely sealed off her new powers, buried the memories so deep she forgot they were even there.

She had real power now, she knew, brushing against it in her mind. Not the wild, elusive magic of the tower, but something tangible, something solid. It was terrifying… She could forget about her birthright, forget about the towers, the angels, Valora… When that power wasn't burning through her, she felt normal, was normal, but this… She'd opened a door she couldn't close.

"I don't owe you an explanation," Squall said gruffly, "and I don't appreciate being detained in this manner. There was only one murder committed here today."

"An attack on the Galbad—" Hagar began, but was silenced when Laguna placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Leave them be, she's no threat to us," he declared.

Hagar sighed, but nodded. "You heard the President," he said, turning to the surrounding guards, "I want answers, go find them. Now." He sent her one last piercing look before retreating himself, leaving them alone with Laguna.

"Well, I'll say one thing, you certainly know how to shake things up," Laguna whispered conspiratorially. "Bastard only got half what he deserved."

A ghost of a smile flitted across Squall's face, echoing eerily the one of the man across from him. Nichole didn't feel their satisfaction. She had lost control, had almost killed a man. She was trained to control her temper, on how to act in situations like this, but all of it had been thrown out the window because she'd been angry and had the power to do something about it.

She was still angry, but this time the anger was directed where it should have been in the first place: herself. She should have been able to save him—to save Cid. She was supposed to be a pinnacle of the universe, she was a Sorceress with the power of Hyne, and still she could do nothing for a man that hadn't deserved to die. And it was all because one crazy bitch decided to play games rather than come after her directly.

Nichole left Squall with Laguna. She had to get away, she needed to breathe. The entire thing, from beginning to end, was her fault. No one else should have died—not Rinoa, not Cid—no one else should have been hurt. After she cleaned her hands she walked the hallways blindly, searching for someplace quiet, somewhere she could think.

Valora wanted her, needed her to die so she could take control of the tower. Nichole had wondered time and time again why Valora hadn't simply come to kill her. She was free to do so now, free from the magic binding her to Gaea. Why play these games? What could possibly be gained from it? What could be more important than the power to destroy the universe?

It had to stop. All of it had to stop, even if she had to hunt down the bitch herself. She wasn't going to stand around while more people died. She needed Griever, wondered if her need was great enough for him to answer. Xavier had said that there were ways an angel could die. She wanted to know all of them and she wanted to know them now.

Pushing her hair away from her eyes, she was surprised to find herself in the courtyard where they'd arrived earlier that day. Dusk had fallen, and the lit pathways lead her to a quiet raised stone bed lined with trees. She hoisted herself up the wall, walking over to the largest tree and settling back against its trunk.

Seconds later the Ragnarok roared into the courtyard.

The ramp lowered and Zell's head peaked out under the wing. She contemplated going to him, but froze as she heard the sounds of footsteps ringing out on the cobblestones. Two parties were approaching: one from the south and one from the north. She caught a flash of uniform as the party from the south walked right by her little spot. It was the Galbadians. She wondered just what they planned on doing now; they had won… They'd cut off Garden's head. What more did they need?

She heard Zell's cry of shocked outrage as the Headmaster's body was wheeled in from the east. She shook her head to clear her own guilty tears as she leaned over to get a better view. Zell stood with Quistis, their arms linked as they held onto each other for support. Xu stood off to the side, observing stonily as two men transported the gurney into the ship.

The Galbadians reached the small group just as Squall and Laguna came into the courtyard. Nichole could see from where she was that Squall was pissed, and could only hope his anger wasn't directed at her.

"Leaving so soon?" General Caraway asked, stoically.

Squall glared but otherwise ignored him. Quistis dragged a struggling Zell onto the ship and out of Nichole's view as Xu moved to flank Squall.

"And where's the little Sorceress now?" General Caraway asked, with polite indifference. "She's a spitfire, that one."

Squall's expression darkened. "SeeD has nothing more to say to you. The Headmaster's decision stands."

Caraway tensed, but it was Skirl—the man she'd almost killed—who spoke. "Not anymore. Your Headmaster is dead, and you are guilty of harboring yet another dangerous Sorceress. You will hand her over immediately, and then we will negotiate the terms of your surrender."

"We'll be handing over nothing to you," Xu spat, "no one will be backing Galbadia when they hear of the assassination of Headmaster Kramer."

"Your words mean nothing, little girl," Skirl sneered. "What does the Commander have to say about it?"

Squall crossed his arms. "I say that you wanted a war, and now you've got one. As to the Sorceress," he continued, his voice taking a hard edge as he stepped towards the man, "get the fuck out of my sight you sniveling little moron, before I finish what she started."

Nichole slapped a hand over her mouth to hold back her laugh as the pompous little prick took two full steps back in fear. _Go Squall!_

"You'll regret that!" Skirl said.

"Not likely," Xu muttered as Caraway held out a hand to keep Skirl quiet.

"If you won't see reason..." he said. "President Loire, a word, please."

"Yes, General?" Laguna asked, struggling to keep his mirth from showing.

"There are criminals of Galbadia standing on Estharian soil; we demand that you extradite them to our jurisdiction immediately."

Laguna frowned. "Esthar has extended political asylum to both parties for the purpose of this meeting. You came into Esthar as free parties and you will leave that way."

General Caraway shook his head. "Then you give me no choice but to declare that Esthar is harboring fugitives. Until such a time as that the criminals are extradited into my custody, we are at war."

"So be it," Laguna agreed, as six guards stepped out of the shadows. "Gentlemen, I bid you farewell. Guards, escort these men from the city, please. I don't expect that they will be trouble, but be careful all the same."

Nichole, seeing her chance to move without being seen, got up, joining the group as the Galbadians were escorted out. Squall raised an eyebrow at her when she came to his side, but said nothing, turning instead to Laguna.

"While Garden appreciates Esthar's protection, we don't want to cause political hardship between the two great nations—"

"I think we can cut the crap," Laguna declared, "now that the idiots are gone."

"Esthar's already in this war," Zell announced, coming down the Ragnarok's ramp. "Galbadia's here in force. I'd hoped you'd gotten the message."

Laguna nodded. "We did. Troops have already been deployed to reinforce the villages you gave us coordinates for." He turned to Squall. "They brought the war to us before the negotiations even began."

"It's a good thing you sent Zell out in the Ragnarok, or we wouldn't have known about it until it was too late, communication has always been spotty in that region," Kiros added, Ward nodding at his side as they came in from the left.

"I stuck to Esthar's borders," Zell explained, "and on one of the passes I noticed movement on Minde Island. It looks like they're trying to come in from the south to avoid the magic of the Salt Lake and catch Esthar by surprise."

"Numbers?" Squall asked.

"Massive," Zell supplied. "A regiment of foot soldiers—at least 8,000 strong—a couple squadrons of MG casters, a couple hundred each of those GIM52A and GIM47N combat units, and three of those Iron Clads—that thing we took on at the missile base during the Sorceress War. It's an army capable of wiping the Gardens off the map."

"Or Esthar," Kiros added, sighing. "We have the numbers and the technology to beat them eventually, but it will take time to gather that much force."

"You're sure they mean to attack Esthar, and not just Garden?" Squall asked.

Zell sighed. "They've already obliterated the two residential towns on Minde Island. I saw smoke and carnage, but I didn't dare land—I didn't think we could afford to lose the Ragnarok."

"It seems they've given us no choice," Laguna said. "The people of Esthar won't stand for an attack on their own. We will fight; they'll still have to make it through the Abandan Plains and the Sollet Mountains before they'll reach the city's territory. The monsters from the Lunar Cry still roaming those areas will do some of the work for us. We have much to do. I want to have a discussion about hiring SeeD to repel the invaders, but for now you should go back to Garden. Take Cid home. I'll have Kiros set up a time to meet to begin the planning."

"We look forward to it," Squall replied, before walking up the ship's ramp. Nichole followed him, her stomach in knots. Squall sighed as she sat next to him but said nothing to her during the trip back to Garden..

Nida, Dr. Kadowaki, and Matron Edea were all there as they disembarked. The mood was somber while Quistis and Xu guided the gurney down between them.

"No!" Edea cried out harshly, rushing to it, throwing back the sheet that covered Cid's face. "Oh, Hyne, NO!" she cried louder, staring down at his pale form in shock.

Dr. Kadowaki was behind her the next moment, tears clouding her eyes as she pulled the sobbing widow away, murmuring words of comfort as she guided her out of the hangar. Nida shook his head, his eyes shining with tears but his face was as still as stone as the sheet was pulled back over the body.

"Commander, a word?" he addressed Squall.

"Yes?"

"At 18:48 hours today, Balamb Garden was attacked by Galbadian paratroopers. No casualties have been reported and the attack was successfully repelled. At the same time, Trabia Garden also came under attack; their status is the same; no casualties, attack repelled. We estimate that this would have been almost the exact time of the assassination."

"A distraction…" Squall muttered, "just a distraction. Thank you for the report. I want the written copies on my desk by 0700 tomorrow."

Nida nodded, saluted, and left.

Squall glanced at Nichole, his eyes hard and shrouded. "Report to your dorm and stay there. I'll expect to see you first thing tomorrow morning."

If it had been anyone else she would have told him to stick his orders where the sun didn't shine, but she simply nodded, not trusting her voice. He walked away without a backwards glance and she was left, standing alone, feeling like her world had been ripped apart at the seams.

-oooOooo-

**AN**: I hope everyone who is reading this is enjoying it, but I'd really like to know what people think *hint* *hint*.

Thanks to Kimmae and all of her wonderful advice, encouragement, and editing skills. She's the best!


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

So here I slave inside of a broken dream

_Balamb Garden, Esthar Airstrip, Esthar, October 31, 082 ALC, 8:12 Hours_

Sounds of retching greeted her from the small bathroom, echoing off the tiled walls and bouncing straight back to her groggy brain. Nichole groaned, swinging one arm up to block out the sun.

Feeling a little queasy herself, she pushed her wild tangle of hair back and crawled out of bed. She found Anne sprawled ungracefully on the bathroom floor, hugging the toilet.

"I thought Adrian was supposed to get you something for that?" she asked, running a cloth under the tap and wringing it out.

"Yeah," Anne agreed, wiping the corners of her mouth with the offered cloth before pressing it against her forehead, "he was supposed to. He got caught up with the attack yesterday, something about observing the medics in action. He's going to bring it by this morning…" She slapped a hand over her mouth, looking a little green. "It can't be soon enough," she choked out.

"Is there anything I can do to help in the meantime?"

Anne shook her head slightly, waiting for the wave to pass before she answered, "No, I know it makes you sick to watch. Go find something else to do. Me and my porcelain pal here will be just fine."

Nichole giggled. "Okay. I'll send Adrian in when he arrives."

She closed the bathroom door just as more sounds of retching spilled out. She pulled her brush out and started going through her hair. She wondered how Anne's news had gone over with Gavin, and made a mental note to ask her—after she'd gotten her remedy.

Yawning, she walked out of the bedroom to check if Quistis had left any coffee and straight into Adrian. He caught her by the shoulders, his eyes dancing with laughter. "You really do have timing, don't you?" he said, steadying her. "Do you ever watch where you're going?"

She was surprisingly happy to see him. "Nope, never."

He laughed, and she wondered why he didn't do so more often. He was so vividly beautiful. She forced herself to snap out of it before she embarrassed herself. "Anne's in the bathroom hugging the toilet, if you want to put her out of her misery."

He nodded. "Might as well."

She shuffled out of his way, watching the door slide shut behind him, sighing. Why was it always so hard? She knew he liked her—or at least Anne said he did. Nichole could have all the courage in the world and she still wouldn't be able to approach him… Stupid, Hyne, was she stupid.

That he hadn't approached her… well, maybe that spoke volumes in itself. Maybe Anne was wrong. But then what about yesterday?

She threw herself on the little futon with a sigh of frustration. Who was she kidding? She wasn't fit for a relationship. She was soiled goods. Maybe she didn't have the physical marks anymore but she was the same freak she'd always been. She still couldn't bear to go without leggings, and wearing a simple t-shirt—rather than the long sleeved shirts she'd always wore—just about gave her conniptions.

Anne was prodding her every morning to just try something new, to make a step toward normal. She'd even gone so far as to buy her some new things for her wardrobe: a pair of Capri leggings, a three-quarter-length sleeved shirt. Nichole had tried, she truly had, but she'd felt like everyone was staring at her both days she'd worn them.

Hyne, she was a mess. Her family knew it, her friends guessed at it; hell, even Adrian knew… Why couldn't she fix it? Feeling even more miserable, she hugged her pajama clad legs. Of course, now, just to top it all off, she was a Sorceress.

She couldn't be enough of a freak already. No, let's just add a title to it.

"Gil for your thoughts, milady," Gavin said, playing up his corny Centrian accent.

She looked up, startled that she hadn't heard him come in—did everyone have the code to their dorm? As much as she'd missed him, even missed his odd sense of humor, she just wasn't in the mood.

"They're not worth that much."

He frowned, crossing the room to squat in front of her, so he was at her eye level. "What's wrong, my lady? Do I sense dragons that need slaying? Or perhaps a knight who needs some sense knocked into him?"

Any other time she would have laughed at the image of Gavin rushing off to slay dragons and knock some sense into her knight, but her problems weren't so simple.

"Nothing's wrong, no dragons, no knights…" she managed to get out, but because it was Gavin and because he'd always been there for her, she couldn't help but choke out, "it's just… everything."

Sitting down, he pulled her into his arms before the first traitorous tear slid down her cheek. "Everything is a lot to be wrong," he soothed, dropping the corny accent, rubbing circles on her back while she cried.

"There, now," he said, when her tears turned into small hiccups. "Want to talk about it?"

She shrugged, keeping her face turned, holding onto the reassurance he offered. "I don't know," she said, finally straightening—comforted when he kept his arm around her, "just a bit overwhelmed, I guess."

"That's understandable; everything seems to be focused on you. Whether by fate or design, you seem to be the key to everything in this mess."

"I don't want to be," she cried, "I'm not some Hyne damned hero! I can barely keep myself together."

"I know, and so does everyone else. We're doing our best to make this as easy on you as we can. That's part of why Tobias frowned so heavily on you being on the Command team. He wondered if you were going to be roped into more than you could handle."

"I'm not incapable—" she snapped.

"I know you're not," Gavin interrupted, "and so does he. We just worry about you because we care. It would help us worry less if you'd talk to us occasionally."

"Everyone has their own problems to deal with," she explained, pulling away from him, "they don't need mine."

She only managed a few inches before he pulled her back, forcing her to look him in the eyes. She flinched, surprised by the anger she saw simmering there. "I don't need to hear that particular pity party," he said, his voice quiet and lethal, "we—like it or not—are your support in this, and we expect and need you to confide in us. Let us know what's going on." He shook his head. "If you remove emotion entirely, if you aren't at your best, we all die. It's as simple as that."

He sighed, his eyes softening as tears pooled in hers. "Maybe that's not what you needed to hear," he said. "We are counting on you, but that doesn't mean you have to do it alone. We love you, and we will support you to the end, no matter what."

She nodded, throwing her arms around him. "Thanks… I think I needed that."

Sniffling sounded from behind her and she let go of Gavin enough to turn, finding Anne standing with tears running down her cheeks, and a somewhat mortified looking Adrian. Nichole blushed dark enough to match her hair.

"It's the damn hormones," Anne cried out, moving to Nichole and pulling her into a bone-crushing hug. Nichole grinned at Gavin who had suddenly become rather crowded, but he just smirked, motioning for her to continue.

She hugged Anne to her, smiling against her hair. "Don't cry or I'm going to start again," Nichole warned.

"Women…" Adrian complained in that exasperated, annoying tone that grates on every woman's nerves.

Anne stiffe ned in anger, but Nichole just grinned. "Shall I get him back?" she whispered.

Anne nodded slightly, her eyes dry and furious as she straightened, pulling herself to her feet. Nichole flicked a hand in Adrian's direction, extending a tendril of her Sorceress magic into him. She'd been up most of the night studying the memories given to her by Rinoa and she was eager to try out this particular trick.

Nichole hugged Gavin briefly, whispering, "Thanks," Before removing herself from the couch.

Adrian's eyes were looking around frantically and Nichole cracked up at his panicked eyes. Anne looked at her in confusion but Nichole was too far gone to tell her what the joke was, so it took a moment for Anne to figure it out.

Gavin, looking amused, just shook his head as Nichole cackled like a hyena.

Anne went over to her brother. "Well, that's one way to shut him up," she noted, poking the frozen Adrian in the stomach. When she got no reaction, she did it again, hard enough that he should have flinched. "Where did you learn this little trick?" she asked.

Nichole composed herself enough to answer, "Rinoa pulled it on me a few times. I could probably keep him that way indefinitely."

Anne was still poking, trying to elicit some reaction. Nichole took pity on him, grabbing Anne's finger before she could poke him in the eye. "He can still hear, see, smell, and feel everything that you do to him, so be nice."

"You mean you're going to let him out?" she asked, winking at her from where he couldn't see. "I rather like him this way. No off-handed comments, no insults. Besides, I'd think you'd want a living statue… all of the benefits, without any of the mess…"

Nichole blushed at Anne's implication, but played along anyway. Adrian deserved just a little torture after all he'd put her through. "I don't know." she pretended to contemplate it. "Maybe you're right. He is _so_ much more attractive when he can't open his mouth to ruin it."

Gavin snickered. "You two are terrible."

Nichole laughed as Anne exclaimed, "Don't you know it!"

Nichole began to feel little tugs on her magic, a jab here, a poke there, as he tested it for weaknesses. He was much more powerful than she'd given him credit for. Maybe she wouldn't be able to hold it.

"Uh, uh, uh," she said, ticking off the words with her finger. He just glared at her. "I suppose I don't want a statue. What fun would that be?"

"True." Anne smiled.

"I'm not stupid, though. Before I let you go, you have to promise there won't be any retribution, especially on Anne's part." She watched him for a sign he agreed but it wasn't like he could show it; she'd just have to let him go and pray. She was pretty sure he wouldn't hurt Anne, and with her new powers, she could take care of herself.

She pulled the power back to her, but before the last of it came, before she could even blink, he was moving, barreling toward her. She squealed in fright, forgetting all about the power, all about her plans in pure blind panic. She ducked, rolling just barely under his outstretched fingers. Her blood pounded in her ears but over it she could hear Gavin's howls of laughter.

_Men_...

"What's going on here?!" Quistis' shocked cry gave Adrian the time to strike.

Nichole was up and over his shoulder before she could blink. Automatically she aimed a foot for his groin which he blocked with ease.

"Let me down," she demanded, going still, hoping that he'd give up if she didn't struggle.

"Put her down this instant!" Quistis agreed sharply.

Adrian sighed, doing as he was told let go of her. She almost took a nose dive off his shoulder with the lack of support, catching herself on his back. She had to clamber over his body to shimmy her way back to the ground. He kept his hands up, refusing to assist her in any way. She was red by the time her feet hit the floor.

His eyes were dark and laughing as she stood with her hands still clasped around his neck. She removed them quickly and backed up.

"Now what in the blazes is going on in here?" Quistis asked.

"Just the normal retribution," Nichole explained. "Thanks Quisty, I owe you."

She shook her head, bringing her hand up to her forehead. "Would you two just go get a room already? The tension is enough to drive anyone insane."

Nichole's blush deepened, going from her head to her toes as she gaped at Quistis, completely mortified. She stared at the floor, hoping that a void would open up beneath her feet and swallow her.

"You either want me to put her down or you don't," Adrian said quietly. Nichole stared at him in shock, knowing that she couldn't have heard that right, as Quistis smiled.

"Carry on then, the room next door is vacant at the moment."

Nichole, too dumbfounded to do anything, didn't protest as Adrian tossed her over his shoulder once more, carrying her like baggage. The only rational thought going through her mind was the desperate hope that no one else saw her like this.

"Well, that's one way to shut you up," Adrian quipped, setting her down in the living room of Squall's dorm. She searched his eyes, looking frantically for some clue as to what had possessed him. Finding nothing she could decipher, she sighed.

"I'm sure you're wondering why you're here."

She nodded, stepping around him to lean against the wall.

"Anne knocked some sense in to me. She can be rather… persuasive, when she wants to be." He crossed his arms, staring at the wall above her head as he spoke. "She told me I was being a fool. Maybe I am…" He shook his head, and then actually looked at her. "I wanted to tell you that I haven't forgotten about the night in Balamb Hotel. I just… I don't know how to proceed. All I seem to do is fuck it all up."

She shook her head, wondering what he wanted from her. Was he backpedaling, trying to explain everything away, or was he implying he wanted to start something? She had no clue. She wanted to scream at him for sending her even more mixed signals.

"Talking is a start," she managed to say, proud of herself for being just as vague as he was.

"I'm sorry I was a coward," he said, the words all coming out in a rush, so that she had to work to decipher them. "Old habits die hard, I guess."

Old habits? What was he talking about? He'd never avoided her before. "I'm not sure what you mean… If you want to forget about the whole thing all you have to do is say so, I don't need an explanation—I know I'm not your type."

"That's the thing," he said stepping closer to her, "you're so damn wrong." He shook his head. "Look, before I explain, could you just answer one thing for me? Honestly?"

She nodded.

"Do you care for me?"

"Yes." Her response was automatic, out of her mouth before she even thought about it. She wanted to take it back, to add something safe to it like, 'you're one of my friends', but she couldn't. He'd asked for honesty and he'd gotten it, now she could only hope he didn't make fun of her for it.

He stepped even closer. "Good. That is to say… I mean… Well—why is this so damn difficult?" He turned, punching the wall to her right. She jumped, exclaiming softly about why men had to be such idiots as she grabbed his hand, looking it over for injury.

She realized just what she was doing as he stared down at her in shock. "Just don't laugh," he asked, and she shook her head. She wouldn't, she couldn't ever be that cruel, not to him. "I've been running from you—from the way I feel about you—for years. It's no excuse really, but even after that night… That night in Balamb, it just seemed best to leave it be, I thought you would regret what you said."

_Years… Years? What the hell… Years!?_

"Yes, years," he agreed. She hadn't even realized she'd spoken it aloud but his answer was irrefutable. "I had a crush on you when I was twelve, starting the year we left the orphanage. I teased you, picked on you, and did everything I could to get your attention, just like any other boy." He smiled, a self-depreciating gesture. "I was sixteen when I knew it was something more… It scared the hell out of me. I ran… I ran fast and hard and tried not to look back. I dated serially and I avoided you. When I couldn't avoid you I was rotten to you."

She didn't want to hear this, didn't want her heart to beat so quickly in her chest; didn't want the hope fluttering in her stomach to exist.

"When the missile attack on Trabia happened, when I thought I would lose you, that's when it all sunk in. I stopped running from myself… but I told myself it was too late, you hated me by then… I'd never have the chance."

She reached out shakily, putting her fingers on his cheek. She didn't need to hear anymore. He shook his head. "I need to finish… If I don't I'll probably chicken out again," he said, pulling her hand away, but keeping it held in his. "I threw myself into work, became the prodigy of the Healers, until we transferred here. You almost died and they wouldn't let me do anything. I've never felt so helpless in my life. When we found out about your injuries, what caused your scars… Hyne, Nichole, I could have killed the bastard myself for what he did to you, slow and painful. He deserved so much more than a quiet assassination.

"Then… that night in Balamb. You scared me, in the shower, and then after... You wouldn't believe how hard it was to stick to dinner and a movie. I woke up from the dream… and something about what Alexis said… I wasn't good enough for you. I'd only end up hurting you. It was enough to give me second thoughts. What if he was right, or worse, what if you regretted what you'd said? So I left…"

She shook her head in denial, of the words, of the truth in them. "You did hurt me. I thought you'd lied to me. That you were disgusted and just didn't know how to tell me. That you thought I wasn't worth the trouble." She shook her head, trying to hold back her tears. She'd done enough crying.

"You are trouble incarnate, but you are worth every bit of it, always," he whispered, tilting her chin so that her eyes met his before his lips descended on hers. The kiss was gentle, undemanding, and sweet, but there was an underlying heat there that had her heart racing all the tension leaving her body.

She reached up, hooking her arms behind his neck as the kiss turned to something _more._

Ding, ding, dong… "SeeD Nichole Skye, please report to the Headmaster's office. I repeat, SeeD Nichole Skye, please report to the Headmaster's office."

They had incredibly rotten timing. She just couldn't catch a fucking break. Adrian laughed, kissing her again briefly. "I'll still be here when you get back," he assured her, "I won't run this time, I promise."

She wanted so badly to ignore the summons, afraid that if she left now the whole thing would turn out to be just a dream. "I'll see you tonight, then?" she asked.

"Count on it," he said, kissing her again, this one a promise of things to come. Reluctantly they broke their embrace. Feeling dazed, like she wasn't quite herself, she left. Her fingers went to her still tingling lips as she walked down the hall and to the elevator.

He liked her. He really liked her… Had liked her for years. The mantra repeated over and over in her mind but still she couldn't quite believe it. The elevator dinged and she squeezed into it with four others.

She wasn't naïve enough to think he loved her; he'd avoided the L word so carefully, but even "like" was so much more than she could have wished for. She wondered if the words—the actions—would ever sink in as she disembarked on the third floor.

She forced herself to shake it off as she entered the Headmaster's office. Squall sat behind Headmaster Cid's desk, scanning through a stack of documents, while Quistis—when did she get up there?—and Matron Edea sat in the far right corner, talking in low tones over more stacks. Xu and Zell huddled over even more stacks on the coffee table by the low leather loveseat.

"Nichole, good, thanks for coming," Squall greeted, his tone chilled and formal. She'd hoped he wasn't still angry with her, but it seemed she was wrong. She saluted, waiting for his orders. "At ease," he said finally, glancing up from the paper he was holding. He did a double-take, his mouth dropping open in shock.

Wondering what the hell he found so appalling she looked around. Finding nothing out of the ordinary she looked back to find that his eyes were laughing. Looking down she finally saw the source of his amusement: She was still in her pajamas.

White and gray kittens played with green balls of string on her purple pants. Her top could have passed for normal, being of the solid white long-sleeved variety, but Hyne…

For the second time in one morning she wished fervently that a hole would open up beneath her and end her miserable existence—just get it over with.

"Nice uniform," Squall choked out, managing—just barely—to keep a straight face.

She grimaced. Funny… real funny. She was standing there in her freaking pajamas for Hyne's sake, and Squall—Mr. Stick-Up-My-Arse-The-Size-Of-Balamb—learns how to make a joke.

Why did it have to be the kitten pajamas? The one day—one day—it just had to be the pajamas Anne had given her as a gag.

"Just go ahead and laugh," she snarled.

To add insult to injury, that's just what he did, snorting with laughter.

Of course everyone in the room looked at him like he'd grown a second head, at least until they noticed her, then the snickers started. She refused to look around, too embarrassed to do anything but blush, trying to hold back tears of humiliation. She had walked through Garden in her pajamas, had stood—like an idiot—in an elevator with four other people in her pajamas. She had walked into the Headmaster's office to report to her Commander in her pajamas. She was losing it.

At least someone was enjoying her predicament. Squall was trying vainly to control himself. Nichole had never seen him laugh—not like that. He was always so serious, so mature. She knew he had a sense of humor but he rarely showed it. It was almost worth the humiliation… Almost.

"Sorry," he said, finally winning the battle, but still smiling widely.

She found it hard to be mad at him. "Sure."

"I called you here for a couple of reasons: First, we've been searching for Headmaster Cid's will for a couple of hours now; Quistis was supposed to retrieve you to help, but she said something about you being tied up. Anyway, Cid wasn't the tidiest record keeper, and his filing system leaves a lot to be desired, so we could really use the extra eyes."

"Okay," she agreed.

"Secondly, I want you to sit down with Edea to start your training as a Sorceress; we've decided that it's too essential to wait. I don't know why you didn't think it was important enough to inform your Commander or include it in your report, but it doesn't matter any longer on a professional level. As of now you are discharged from SeeD; all pay, rank, and titles are hereby stripped from you."

She felt as if he'd thrown a bucket of ice water on her. Her heart skipped two full beats as a protest formed on her lips. "But I did—"

He shook his head, cutting her off. "There has never been a Sorceress in SeeD. SeeD was created with the ultimate goal of keeping the Sorceress' power in check. To have a Sorceress in the ranks would be counter-productive to this goal. However, there is precedence for a Sorceress to be housed in Garden and even serve on her Committee, or in any other advisory role."

He sighed. "Garden officially requests that you, Sorceress Nichole, remain in Garden as an adviser to the Commander; you will be paid for your time, and room and board will be provided for you."

She was dumbfounded. He was stripping her of her status, of everything she'd spent her life trying to achieve. Tears clogged her throat, burning her eyes. She could stay here, that much she understood, but what would she do? She would be an outsider, no longer a part of the group. An outcast…

"Give the poor girl time to think it through, Squall," Xu called from the couch.

"I agree," Quistis said from behind Nichole. "Here." She handed her a small black satchel, the one Nichole used during missions. "I brought your clothes. There's a bathroom through that door there." She pointed to a half-hidden door in the wall to the right of the desk. "Go get changed and think about it."

Nichole was relieved by her thoughtfulness, but didn't thank her. Couldn't, as the tears started spilling onto her cheeks. She turned, dashing for the door, not wanting her sorrow to be broadcast to those in the office.

She felt numb as she pulled on her leather. Lost. The place she'd worked so hard to get to was gone, and all because she'd accepted power from a dying girl. She knew inexplicably that it was part of the burden. She'd thought at the time that it would simply be the pain that came with the transfer of that much energy, but now she knew it meant so much more.

She had seen the way the guards in Esthar had looked at her; fear, awe, loathing… She would never be herself again, never just Nichole. Now she was the Sorceress, the child of Hyne, cursed.

She looked at her reflection in disgust. The leather—which had always made her feel so empowered—just made her look even more menacing. She needed new clothes, she didn't want to look dangerous. She wanted to look normal, wanted to be normal.

She wondered briefly if Anne had any of that hair dye left, contemplated how she'd look as a blonde. Maybe she could just dye her hair and leave—find someplace in the world where Valora's SeeD hunt hadn't touched.

She sighed, wondering why she'd even thought of it. She already knew what she had to do. She had no one else, no place else. Her family, her friends, Adrian… what ever happened, she didn't have much choice. Squall had said she could stay, she'd just have to earn her keep.

"I'll do it," she announced as she stood before the desk once more.

"Good," Squall said, glancing up from the papers he'd been studying. "We can use your help. Just look for anything that looks like a will. Sort the other documents by type, we'll worry about a filing system later." He indicated a chair with a table next to it and three stacks resting on its top. "I've got a meeting with President Loire in four hours. I'll announce your decision to them then. During the meeting you'll stay with Edea to start training as a Sorceress. I've been advised by the Committee that you should be chained by the Odine bangle. I'm disregarding this. You are a target in this war, and being able to defend yourself may be critical. I've been informed that my decision will stand as long as there are no signs of outside influence or corruption. You will be carefully watched."

"Okay," she agreed, and went to get to work.

The task was mind-numbing and sad. It still hadn't quite hit home that the Headmaster was gone, would never be coming back. Nichole hadn't had a lot of interaction with the man, as he was often busy, but she'd gotten the impression that he was ultimately kind. She couldn't imagine what Edea felt about it all and kept stealing glances of her. She seemed composed, but the calm looked forced, and the lines around her eyes bore the strain.

Nichole was most of the way through her third stack when Zell called out, "Found it!" She grinned at his enthusiasm—he did a little victory dance punching the air—but kept working through her stack.

Squall barely even looked up. "Bring it here."

Zell nodded, doing as he was bid and Squall took a moment to read through it.

"He had a plan for everything," Squall said.

"What's it say?" Zell asked impatiently.

"I'm not going to read all the legal mumbo, but the break down is: He gives Quistis his Triple Triad deck, Seifer his gunblade collection, and Edea the rest of his worldly possessions as well as full control over Garden Inc. and all of its assets." He turned to Edea. "He leaves it up to you, whether your dream continues on or dies with him. He gives the Committee the option to try to buy you out rather than close, but the decision is yours."

Edea nodded. "I will keep the dream alive. Our dream," she said, wistfully.

"In that case," Squall continued, "you inherit his seat as head of the Garden Committee. Xu, you are hereby promoted to Headmaster. You are to assist Edea in whatever fashion she requires. I'm to retain my position as Commander unless Garden code dictates otherwise. Congratulations," he added, almost as an afterthought.

Xu looked floored as Zell slapped her on the back, and then had to catch her before she fell over from shock. She blushed as he set her back on her feet. "Thanks," she said, rather meekly.

"Cid wishes to be buried in the flower field outside of the orphanage. We'll arrange a small service there and a memorial should be held in the Quad when we can get all the Gardens back together. His body will be kept in stasis until we can arrange the funeral." Squall sighed.

Xu nodded slowly, while Edea looked away, her eyes gazing out of the window blindly as tears dripped down her porcelain cheeks.

"I hate to be the bearer," Quistis said, regretfully, "but we need to go, or we'll be late to meet with President Loire."

Squall nodded curtly. "Yes, of course. Xu, are you comfortable with taking on your title for this meeting?" Noticing Xu's small nod, he continued. "Good. Zell, you're flying, let's go."

Squall didn't even acknowledge Nichole as he strode out of sight. Quistis smiled at her—a gesture meant to be reassuring—before following him. Xu and Zell both nodded politely before leaving her with the still zoned-out Edea.

Nichole sighed. This was just great. She knew Squall was hurt because she hadn't told him of her new status. The thing was, she would have told him if she'd remembered herself. The only time she'd thought of it at all was during the funeral when Rinoa's memories pushed their way to the surface. Once she'd shoved them back down she'd dismissed them, ignored the fact that she was a Sorceress.

As it was, both times she had used her new-found abilities—the shield and her attack on the Galbadian delegate—she'd thought she simply been able to finally use the tower. It wasn't until Hagar Instrone had pointed it out that she remembered.

So, really, Squall had very little cause to be upset… Still, she knew why he was. She'd taken Rinoa from him and now she had Rinoa's powers too. But what did he expect? He knew that a Sorceress had to pass her powers on before she could rest. The lack of a Rinoa zombie was proof enough that someone had to have her powers… Argh… thinking about it was getting her nowhere.

Edea was still in her chair, staring out the window, and Nichole studied her as the afternoon light bathed her face. She was as Nichole had remembered her to be: beautiful, untouchable. The years hadn't dulled her beauty in the least.

Nichole's feelings were all mixed up when it came to Edea. She was the only mother Nichole had ever known, but she had willingly split Nichole from the person she'd held most dear. Why? Why had Edea done it… and why couldn't Nichole bring herself to hate her for it?

She got up, intending to go ask when a wave of dizziness struck her. She plopped back down, holding her head in her hands as a humming pain radiated through her skull. She collapsed, falling out of her chair—Matron's gasp ringing in her ears—as her world faded to black.

-oooOooo-

She awoke slowly, rolling her head side to side experimentally, relieved to find that the pain was gone. She was resting on something firm, yet soft, and she opened her eyes.

"Ah, awake are we? So glad you could join us." The masculine voice was so familiar, but she just couldn't place it as she looked around. One thing was for sure, she wasn't in Garden anymore.

"Where am I?" she asked, still getting her bearings. The room was large, some sort of reception hall or sitting lounge, with old high-backed chairs sitting on the other side of the large wooden coffee table. She was on a velvet settee the color of ripe bananas with gold studded trim. The room was bright and airy; something she might have picked if she'd had the extravagant budget the decorations required.

"This is Hyne's... house, I guess you'd say. This is her reception room; it changes to suit what would be comfortable to whoever is visiting it. It's a rather remarkable bit of magic, but not really what we're here to talk about."

She turned to the speaker—Xavier. He was dressed casually in a white t-shirt and black slacks and leaning against a white bookshelf that was packed to the brim with all sorts of books. His wings were tucked into his back.

"It's very nice," she said, breaking the silence. "So we aren't in the dream world?"

It didn't seem like he could hear her thoughts this time around.

"No, we're on the High Plane, which—while incredibly magical and somewhat in a realm of its own—is based in reality. You are not, however, physically here. You are… well, humans tend to call it having an out-of-body experience."

"So my body is lying somewhere and this is, what? My spirit, my soul?"

He shook his head. "No. Without the soul, the body dies. We would never do such a thing. You, as you are right now, are simply a representation of your consciousness. It won't last long; the consciousness doesn't like being separated from its soul. It's easier to do it with a host, but we don't have the luxury of one, so we shall do the best with what time we have. There's much to tell, and as always, little time."

She grinned. "Of course. Well, let's get to it, what's so important?"

"Always to the point. I've really begun to like you, Pinnacle of Chaos. You've been such an interesting charge." He smiled. "You remember the story of the towers, correct?"

"How could I forget?" she asked.

"Good, then I won't rehash it. The Council is worried about Valora's newest moves. They aren't sure what she's after, but they've declared that it's time for the pinnacles to learn their duties and the best place to do so is in the towers themselves. Therefore the council has overridden Hyne's punishment—the angels not being able to see their own children. You'll be meeting your own father today, and I'll have my own and my brother's child to take care of now."

"Really?"

"Yes. It's happening earlier than we expected; the youngest child has not yet reached the age of majority, but that can't be helped. The towers need to be back to their full strength. Griever, the second Guardian of Chaos, has returned to the High Plane, and with him the power Chaos wields only grows. Your presence limits Valora only so much. Alexis—your father—wanted me to be here when you awoke, as a familiar face, but I don't mind saying my good-byes."

"Sure, thanks for watching out for me," she said, meaning it. He'd done what he could, and she liked him. He was funny in an odd way.

"It's been a pleasure, child; you give an old cynic hope. You probably haven't seen the last of me, but Alexis will be your main contact now, he'll take over your training. Travel well, travel lightly."

She nodded as he walked out, rubbing circles on her temples. She was getting a fuzzy feeling—like something was pulling at her. She closed her eyes, trying to ease it. When she opened them again, a new angel was standing before her.

He was tall, taller than Xavier, with sandy brown hair and amber eyes. His face was handsome in a kind of classic way. He had somewhat delicate looking features and a strong square jaw. She and Tobias obviously got most of their looks from their mother, but she could see some of the resemblance.

He was dressed far more formally than Xavier, wearing nice slacks with a polo shirt and blue blazer. His wings were a brilliant gold and his aura sparkled with both gold and silver light. Angel of Order… he certainly looked the part.

"Alexis, right?" she asked.

"Yes. I am sure Xavier informed you about me. I apologize for the wait. You should be feeling quite out of sorts. That will continue until your soul pulls you back so we'll have to skip all of the reunions and get to the point. The Council has decreed that it will be more beneficial for you to stay on Gaea. You will train with Edea Kramer on how to use the power of Hyne."

"What?!" The word flew out of her mouth like a gunshot as her brain tried to process what he said. Xavier had said 'they' would be staying.

"The Council believes—and I agree with them—that you will be safer on Gaea learning the Sorceress power from Edea. Valora knows her power inside and out; she has had centuries to become familiar with it. The tower is still under her control. Eris—the strongest of Chaos' Guardians—will not be persuaded to just hand over your birthright to you. She demands to meet you, to give you the test, but we cannot risk it."

"Why would meeting Eris be such a bad thing?"

"If she deems you unworthy she has the right to kill you. If you fail, everything that we have worked for will be for naught. Eris has always liked Valora. I have never understood their bond, but then I have never really understood anything when it comes to my sister; it is hard to believe we are related."

"Related?!"

"Well, yes, dear. Xavier did not inform you? She's always been different, but this time she's gone too far."

He spoke as if she'd broken his mother's favorite vase. She wanted to scream at him. He was a fool. "Do you know anything of what your sister has done to me?" she asked, trying to keep her tone level.

"No, dear. We were not permitted to know anything of our children. I am quite sure she has done some awful things. It is still unclear how she managed the dirty trick she pulled on Xavier and Shiloh, but she obviously has her ways. I do apologize for anything she has done, and I agree entirely with the Council. She has taken her games too far, punishment must be rendered, and if that means her death, then so be it."

Her father was certifiably insane, heartless, or incredibly naïve—she couldn't decide which—perhaps a mixture of all three. The fuzziness was making it hard to concentrate. What did he want from her? "What am I supposed to do?" she asked.

"Like I have said, you will train with Edea. Valora does not know how to use Hyne's power, she will not understand it. If you engage her using the power of Chaos we fear you will lose. However, if you use something she does not understand you may have a chance. In the meantime we will teach the other children how to use their towers in ways that may help. Their first priority, however, will be the balance. You know the consequences if Valora succeeds in killing one of them. It will come down to you and you alone."

But Valora had possessed the Sorceress, she wanted to say; that alone screamed to her that Valora knew how to use Hyne's power, but she couldn't form the words. Her tongue—the representation of her tongue—felt completely disconnected from her 'body'.

"We know it is a great deal to ask of one so young, but nevertheless we are counting on you. The other children have requested to say their farewells before you are pulled away. By my estimation that should be any time now." He went to the door, opening it. "You may all come in now," he announced.

Tobias was the first through, heading straight for her with the others trailing behind. "They told us about what's happening. I'm sorry it has to be this way. Keep the Garden safe while we're gone. In the records we'll be on leave, and everyone's memories of us are going to be vague until we return, it's part of the magic of the towers. Keep safe and study hard." He hugged her gently, kissing her forehead before rising to let Gavin take his place.

"Take care of yourself," Gavin said, pulling her into a bone-crushing hug. "Remember that we love you, no matter what. Try not to worry so much; things will work out, they always do. Confide in Squall, he'll support you, I'm pretty sure he loves you just as much as the rest of us. I'll miss you, my lady." He squeezed her once more before letting go.

She was crying but her tear ducts seemed to no longer be working, and she could do nothing but stare through dry eyes as Quistis took his place. "Keep safe, Nichole. I don't envy your task. Try to keep out of trouble and don't let Squall work too hard," she said, giving Nichole a quick hug.

"Move over, you've had your turn," Anne demanded, shoving her way in. Quistis sighed indignantly but backed away. Anne threw herself over Nichole, clinging to her as tears slid down her cheeks. "Damn hormones," she complained, "I'm sorry."

Nichole tried to shake her head but realized she had no control over it. The fuzziness had turned into a full blown pull—and the overwhelming feeling that she just didn't belong. She fought against the urge to give in, to let the pull take her back but she was fading fast, literally. Her vision was blacking out around the corners, making her world seem narrow and dull.

"Stay out of trouble," Anne continued, oblivious to Nichole's plight. "We love you, and we'll miss you, girl. They haven't said much about how long this will take; just that time flows very differently here. We'll do our best to get back to you quickly." She gave Nichole one last squeeze before stepping back into Gavin, who put an arm around her.

Adrian stepped into her view just as her vision cut out, and she fought the now insistent tug of displacement as his arms came around her. She could barely feel his touch, barely hear his voice as he whispered, "I'll miss you." As her consciousness gave up the fight—flying back to join with her soul—as if in a dream, she heard his last whisper, "I love you."

**AN**: Thanks so much to Kimmae. I really hope to hear from any readers, what they think.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

Forever holding onto splitting seams

_Balamb Garden, Esthar City, Esthar, October 10, 082 ALC, Time Unknown_

Things flowed...

"She's coming around."

"Someone call Edea, things are flying again!"

"Give her more sedative."

Thoughts shifted...

"Get Nirn down! Dammit, she's doing it again, get more sedative, stat!"

Her consciousness rose, only to fall under again.

Pain, sadness, anger... Clarity came in a haze of emotion.

"Edea! Thank Hyne! She's fighting off the sedative, she won't let anyone near her! There's some sort of barrier..."

"Back away, leave her."

_Edea…_ she knew that name… _but where? Who?_

Images flashed. A woman, tall, beautiful, with long black hair and sad amber eyes—untouchable; the woman, hair bound and bedecked, dressed vivaciously, those eyes broadcasting hatred. The images mixed, merged, overlapped until she couldn't discern one from the other.

Edea: Sorceress, wife, Matron—Mother. Memories of the Sorceress flowed through her mind; her love, her children. Then sadness, darkness, despair. She had been trapped, locked away in her own mind, seeing glimpses of what was, of what would be.

"Nichole, you've got to come out of it now," Edea coaxed. "That's a girl, you need to wake up."

Nichole followed her Matron's voice, clinging to it as her own memories rose to the surface.

Adrian… everyone… they were gone…

They'd left her there… alone.

"Nichole! Wake up! You're going to hurt someone!" Edea called.

She didn't want to wake up. She didn't want to be there, there was nothing for her there.

"Dammit, child, if you don't get a hold of yourself, I'll put the Odine Bangle on you myself!" Edea snapped.

All at once she was awake, alert, ready. Medical implements flew around the room, some unlucky trainee was slumped in the corner, and Edea stood in the center of it all, her eyes snapping in fury.

Nichole could feel the power flowing wild and unchecked, but try as she might she couldn't stop it.

"H-how do I turn it off?" she stuttered.

"Control yourself, get a hold of your emotions," Edea replied.

Her emotions… she could see now. They were tied so closely to the power, she couldn't tell them apart. She couldn't stop feeling, no matter how she tried; everything was too raw, too present.

"I can't," she admitted, tears of frustration gathering in her eyes.

"Then the best you can do is to channel the power into something non-destructive," Edea advised. "Try to focus it into that shield you've got up. The memories will show you how to see the currents of energy. Merge the uncontrollable stream into the magic of the shield."

Nichole did as she was bid, looking into Edea's past to find what she sought. Energy flared to life in her vision. The heady yellow-blue spark of Edea, the lesser light green of the trainee, and all around her the distinct silver-red of her own essence. She pulled the power from the objects and fed it into the energy surrounding her. The implements stopped mid-air, defying gravity for a moment before plummeting to the ground.

"Good, that should be enough to keep things from happening outside your will," Edea said. "We'll have to start the training sooner than I expected. I'm not sure what caused you to pass out in Cid's office, but whatever it was, you've been in and out for two days now."

She pulled up one of the hard-backed blue chairs. A trainee skittered in, glancing frantically at Nichole as he dragged his comrade from the room.

Edea nodded to him before speaking to Nichole. "They had to keep putting you back under. You were delirious and your powers were fluctuating. That will be the first thing we'll work on. A good Sorceress is always in control of herself. You cannot let the power control you."

Nichole nodded.

"First things first, you need to learn to keep your energy inside of you at all times. Imagine a barrier that lets nothing pass. The image of bricks or glass tends to work best."

Nichole did as she was bid, imagining a glass bubble. The power pushed against it, searching for weaknesses, but ultimately it held. When she felt she had the energy contained, she let the shield drop and breathed a sigh of relief when the objects and persons in the room stayed as they were. It wasn't so hard after all.

"Good," Edea praised. "Although you must remember that the Sorceress' power is infinite, and you only have limited space within you to carry it. If it becomes too great or your emotions run too high you will have to expel some of the energy or it will build up and you will unwittingly perform a Final Strike, killing yourself and all those caught in the blast."

Nichole was horrified. "How am I supposed to get rid of the excess?"

Edea smiled. "Eventually you will learn to control your emotions but for now your shield may make a good conduit for that purpose; it seems to handle it rather well. You're learning quickly. I have something I wanted to tell you, if you'll listen, and then I'll give you another exercise to keep improving your control."

"Sure," Nichole responded. "Actually, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to hear a little about the Sorceresses as well. I haven't had the time to sort through all of the memories yet, and I'm wondering if knowing our history would help me."

"Going through the memories can be a daunting process," Edea sympathized. "I only had time to examine the first half before circumstances prevented me from continuing. A Sorceress is nothing without the memories given to her. They explain who we are, why we are here, and how we came to be.

"In the beginning, Hyne intended the Sorceresses to be a guiding light for humanity. They were to be her vessels, her conduit into the lives of her cherished children. Where her children were created in her image, her daughters were born of her flesh. Six of them came into the world, each with a gift, an affinity for power. Graced with immortality, they would stand against time, carrying out their mother's will.

"Unfortunately, Hyne's power, power never meant to be wielded by anyone but her, was too much for the Sorceresses to bear. One by one they all were taken over by their base emotions, and began using Hyne's gift for their own gain. Hyne saw some of what her daughters would become but she couldn't abandon her hope and so they were sent to Gaea, to fulfill their purpose.

"There they scorned those they were to protect, enslaving them. The humans rebelled under their tyranny, but with the Sorceresses' immortality there was little they could do, and none stood long under their wrath. It was some time before Hyne heard of her children's plight. Upon learning of it, Hyne decreed that the Sorceresses were a mistake, and were no longer her messengers, but she could not find it in her heart to kill her most beloved daughters.

"Instead she stripped them of their immortality, damning them to a life no better than the humans they were to guide. When they died, the power that was Hyne's was to return to her, never to be seen by humanity again.

"As you can attest, this never came to be. The six, angered by Hyne's punishment, sought to keep their power, to take it with them into the afterlife. In secret they gathered, and performed a ritual. Using every bit of power given to them, and a piece of themselves, they bound Hyne's gift to their mortal souls. Each gave something vital in the creation of the spell but none so much as the eldest, who used her very life essence. Her body perished in the process.

"Death appeared to guide her soul into the afterlife and it was then that Hyne discovered what her daughters had done. Anguished, she turned her back on them. There, in the place where her children had defied her, she cursed them. When their mortal lives came to an end Death would not touch her daughters, but neither would they live. They would walk the world as wraiths—ghosts of their former selves—unable to rest, or interact with the world around them, unable to pass on until they relinquished the gift she'd given them.

"The five Sorceresses still amongst the living fled, leaving the sixth, now a wraith, to wander the world alone, forever seeking someone to take her burden. Eventually she found a descended daughter willing to accept Hyne's power, and thus Sorceresses have been created throughout Gaea's history. To this day we still suffer the same fate as the six, unable to die unless we pass Hyne's gift; only able to pass it at our deaths."

"But you passed your power—" Nichole started.

"To Rinoa, yes," Edea supplied. "I'm not quite sure how that came about. My best guess is that it was her own innate gift that caused the power to be drawn to her. Each Sorceress is special, unique in her own way even as she has the abilities of those who came before. The tricks of the trade, you could say. Rinoa's allowed her to accept my burden before I was dead. Your own seems to be your shield. Every Sorceress has something to contribute, and part of your training will be learning how to use them all."

Nichole nodded. Maybe there was something that could be used against Valora. "You mentioned another exercise?"

"Yes, yes, we'll get to that, but first… you've grown so much. I know that you have borne more than any of my children, perhaps save Squall. I'm sorry for it, and yet I'm so proud of what you've become." Edea smiled wistfully. "You know, when you first showed up on my doorstep looking lost and confused, I knew you would be something special, but it is only now that I can see clearly just what that means."

Nichole wasn't sure how to respond; did she mean the Sorceress powers, or was she talking of something else? "Umm… thanks?"

"Your path is still unclear. I can't tell if it's due to your nature, or if it just hasn't been decided yet. My powers aren't as strong as my mother's."

"Your mother?" Nichole asked.

"Ah, yes, sorry... I thought the angels would have told you. My mother, Destiny."

"You're Destiny's child!?"

"I'm not sure what you have heard of Destiny, but, yes I am her daughter. She saw my creation and so it came to be. I fulfill a purpose here on Gaea. Everything that has happened is how it was meant to be. Even Cid's death was preordained."

"You knew he was going to die?" Nichole whispered.

"Yes… not how or when, but I knew he would be taken from me before his time. My mother warned me of it before I became involved with him. She knew it had to happen, that everything that has come to pass depended on me being with him, but still she gave me that choice. Of course, I chose the path I was to be on, and now even with the emptiness that his loss brings, I can't say that I would do it differently."

"I'm so sorry…"

"Don't be. I have earned my place with him, and when my work here is done, I will be with him again. Until then I am comforted by my purpose, by his memory, and by our dream. The future is getting ever clearer."

Edea shook her head. "But enough about this, we should get back to your training."

Nichole nodded.

"When you have mastered the barrier in your mind, you will need to work on the energy-sight. Everything has its own 'signature' and with time and practice you will be able to 'see' these signatures from across Garden. Practice your second-sight until you can see that far and then come find me for another lesson."

"Okay, does that mean I can go back to my dorm then?"

Edea nodded. "Yes, that should be acceptable… Be warned, however, that your actions will be under close scrutiny. I've kept them from putting the Odine Bangle on you so far, but if there are any further incidents with uncontrolled powers, I won't be able to stop it."

"I understand," Nichole said. "Thank you for your help."

-oooOooo-

_Tower of Death, High Plane, March 3, 083 ALC, 10:40 Hours_

She was bored, her back ached, her feet hurt, and the next person to ask if she was okay was going to find out just why she'd been chosen to be the pinnacle of Death.

When they'd said time flowed differently here, they hadn't thought to mention that while their minds were tied to the High Plane—and its double rate of time—their bodies (and everything attached to them) would continue to age as if they were still on Gaea. Which meant that while the baby grew at the normal rate, Anne was suffering an extremely extended bout of the joys and discomforts that pregnancy brought.

After twelve months of backaches, swollen ankles, and mood swings, she was about ready to kill anyone who even looked at her funny.

Worst of all, the High Plane just couldn't properly replicate Balamb Hotdogs. She didn't even _like_ Balamb Hotdogs, but for the past six months it seemed like they were all that she craved.

Azrael, her tower's strongest Guardian, sighed. His silver eyes shifted worriedly under his perfect brows. He looked like an angel, but unlike the angels, he had no aura and his wings were blindingly white. He wore white armor that molded against his slim frame, defining every muscle. His face was beautiful, his features amorphous to the point where it was hard to tell his gender. His hair—the only color on him—was a brilliant gold that spilled over his shoulders, trailing in neat waves to his hips. "Mistress, are you—" he started.

"Don't say it!" she snapped. "If you value your life, you will turn around and walk away without another word."

"I told you to leave her alone. You should know by now that it's best to let her mood swings pass on their own." Thanatos, the tower's other Guardian, pointed out. Where Azrael was light, Thanatos was dark, looking more like Death in Anne's opinion. His eyes were a glittering black, standing out harshly against a pale face mostly hidden under a black shroud. Strands of dark hair wisped against his cheeks but the majority of it was tucked away, covered under his hood and the animal skull that sat atop his head. His body was hidden behind layers of flowing black material that constantly moved, shifting in a non-existent wind.

"I don't appreciate your tone," Anne snarled.

"None of us appreciate your attitude, but we live with it anyway," Thanatos replied cheekily.

Anne growled, "I can remedy that if you'd like—the living part."

Azrael—ever the peace keeper—jumped in. "No, no, that's not necessary. I only came to tell Than that we're needed elsewhere."

Anne nodded. "Go on, then."

Thanatos glared at her but followed Azrael without speaking.

She sighed, feeling guilty for being so short with them. She was on edge today, although she couldn't say why. Something was in the air, something brewing. The last time she'd felt like this was before she'd found out just what Alexis had failed to mention about her heritage.

Finding out that your brother was also your cousin would be a shock to anyone. Finding out that her uncle had killed himself to protect his tower was even more so. She had been pissed that such a thing had been kept from her, but Adrian—Adrian had been devastated. The rage still bubbled up every time she thought of what Valora had done to her family.

Thankfully neither of them had had long to dwell on it. Learning to be Death was actually a rather complex task. Because it was physically impossible for her to be everywhere Death was, most of the time the actual 'Death'—the moment the body could no longer sustain the soul—was handled by the tower and the Guardians. The tower 'remembered' her soul and projected it out to the dying to lead them to the afterlife.

Only deaths that were complicated required her presence. For those, at the moment of Death she traveled to collect the unbound soul and escort it to Elysia—a paradisaical plane in between the two natural planes. Every soul she appeared before saw something different, something they wanted to see. She was judge, jury, executioner. Their worst nightmare, and greatest comfort; most bitter enemy and best friend. She'd celebrated with them and she'd mourned with them, but mostly she just ached, because no matter what they saw, they didn't really see her.

Xavier had once said that loneliness was truly the hardest part of being Death. She had thought it was silly at the time but now she understood what he had meant.

She winced as the baby kicked her in the kidneys and she cradled her belly. He (she had taken to thinking of him as he because 'it' just seemed too clinical) was very active today. His active state mixed with her edginess had her wondering if there was something wrong.

She didn't exactly have access to all the wonders of human medicine, and while Adrian was keeping a close watch on her and Quistis monitored the babies growth, neither of them really knew what they were doing. It appeared that the baby was growing normally according to the time on Gaea, but no one knew how Anne's stint on the high-plane would affect him.

She was worried, frazzled, and totally insecure. It was hard enough to find out that you were meant to be some goddess directing the fate of the universe, but becoming a parent on top of it… her coping skills had reached their limits.

What kind of mother could she be? She was Death, she lived it, breathed it—what could she know about creating life? And her Guardians, they would be around the kid all the time too. Azreal might be okay, but Thanatos was enough to give adults nightmares. And Gavin... well Gavin would be a great dad. He was always so supportive. His Guardians were also less likely to scar the child for life. Scarlet looked like a woman, she dressed a little skimpily and her hair seemed to be flames, but she wasn't scary. Desvin was a little more odd, appearing as a man with feline features, including short fur that covered his body, pointed ears, and a tail. Still, a kitty-man should be a lot less frightening than a shadow who wore an antelope skull as a fashion accessory.

Of course worrying about the effect the Guardians would have on the child was kinda pointless considering that fact that everything could be destroyed tomorrow.

"Are you torturing poor Azrael again?" Gavin asked from the doorway of her library. She looked up in surprise.

"Me…? Never…"

"I suppose he's out in the main chamber pouting over nothing then," he conceded. "I'd ask how you were feeling but since we both know that's a subject best left untouched, how has your day been?"

She smiled; was it any wonder she'd fallen head over heels for him? "Okay. I've got that feeling again, on edge. I don't know. I'm worried it might be the baby, he's been kicking all day."

He frowned, placing his hand on her belly. "I thought kicking was normal."

"It is. I'm probably worrying about nothing again. All the waiting must be getting to me. Anyway, I'm glad you came to see me. I've missed you."

He pulled her into a heated kiss. "I've missed you too," he whispered. "I'm sorry I haven't been able to come here as much as I'd like."

She wasn't exactly happy with the time spent apart but she knew he was just as busy as she was. Destruction was quickly gaining power due to Valora's meddling and so Gavin's work to keep it in check was never-ending.

He wasn't the first person she would have thought of as Destruction incarnate; save the odd fascination he had with things that went 'boom', he was as normal as you got. Xavier had explained that having an affinity to an aspect didn't really affect one's personality, some tendencies might show through, but she wasn't going to turn into Miss Gloom Doom and Murder by taking over the tower. It was more that the aspects called to their chosen. Each had the potential to use every aspect but only one belonged to them. Which was how Nichole had been born from Order but lived in Chaos.

"I understand," she said finally, "it's not like I've been over on your doorstep, either. Anyway, Az and Than have kept me entertained, and Adrian's been here almost daily—not that he's good company right now—but it keeps us from being alone."

"How's he holding up? I haven't seen him at all lately." Gavin asked.

"He's snarkier than usual, and I wouldn't mention Nichole around him if I were you, but he's dealing. He's royally pissed at the Council of course; ever since they refused to let him see her they've been number one on his shit list," Anne informed him.

"I can understand that. They may be able to stop us from seeing her directly but they can't keep us away from our own aspects. She's in a state of constant turmoil and her emotions are linked to her Sorceress powers so she's been causing a great deal of damage. I only get glimpses of her, but at least we know she's still alive."

"Hyne, every time I think about it, it just pisses me off more." Anne scowled. "What were those idiots thinking, leaving her to cope on her own? She's always needed someone to lean on," she ranted. "During the orphanage days it was Squall—and we all know how well that separation went over—and then it was you, and to a lesser degree, the rest of us, and now she has no one. Even though Squall is there, he doesn't remember her as he should. He doesn't even remember Rinoa because the bastards think memories of her loss would trigger the spell holding back his memories of Nichole. It makes me sick!"

"I know," he agreed, "but there isn't anything we can do about it, except to learn what they want us to. We'll be back before we know it. Nichole's a survivor, I know she'll make it through."

"I'm not so sure. Tobias came by a little while before you; there've been some new developments on the Valora front. The Council thinks that she's attempting to influence Nichole in the same way she did Rinoa. There's been some talk of reopening the link between Nichole and Tobias permanently so as to better monitor her. I think it's a horrid idea, but of course Red was all for it."

"He would be. Of course he conveniently forgets that he was the one to shut it off in the first place. He's such an ass… He does more harm than good when it comes to her."

"You have to give him some credit," Anne pointed out, "he has been really worried about her."

"Yeah, when he and Quistis aren't going at it like rabbits," Gavin muttered.

Anne laughed. "Oh, you're just jealous we can't break away that much."

"Maybe," he agreed, pulling her into another kiss, "can you blame me?"

She shook her head, gasping as his mouth trailed to the sensitive spot where her neck and shoulder met.

"Am I interrupting?" Xavier asked, tapping his knuckles gently against the wood of the doorway.

Gavin cursed under his breath and pulled away.

Anne sighed. "Not yet."

"Ah, yes, well, then..." Xavier looked like he wanted to bolt. He'd done rather well, in Anne's opinion, coming to terms with his grown daughter who just happened to be knocked up out of wedlock. There had only been one threat issued to Gavin that she was aware of. "I've come to inform you of a meeting taking place in the courtyard. This will be the last one before you are sent back to Gaea."

"You mean were done here?" Anne asked.

"You'll never be done here," Xavier replied, "but you have learned what you can in the time given, and so it is time for you all to go back and finish what you've started."

"Great! Az! Than!" she yelled, "I'm leaving for Gaea soon, let me know if anything needs a personal touch."

Gavin chuckled at Xavier's somewhat appalled look. Anne ignored them both, grabbing Gavin's arm in one hand and Xavier's in the other. "What are you two standing around for?" she asked as she dragged them towards the door. "We have a meeting to attend and a girl to rescue."

Xavier shook his head, thinking that she was truly her mother's daughter, before allowing himself to be pulled all the way to the center of Hyne's Palace.

Everyone else was already in Hyne's pebbled courtyard when Anne led Xavier and Gavin in, the angels gathered on the opposite side of the pinnacles. None of them truly felt comfortable being together. It was hard being introduced to a father or a child who was a complete stranger. Awkward. She and Xavier were the closest of the bunch—mainly due to the sentimentality that came with pregnancy.

"Now that we are all present," Alexis said, "we can begin."

Nova, Gavin's father, spoke, "You have all learned how to control your own aspects, now it is time you are told why it is so important that you work together. As some of you may have noticed, there are writings on the walls of the towers, stressing the importance of the balance and what it takes to maintain."

Anne nodded. "You mean that jumble about how 'only if the towers are as one will balance be achieved'?"

"Yes," Gaelan, Quistis' father, answered. "We thought, at first, that the words were meant for us, but now we believe that they are for you. We can't be sure of their meaning entirely, but we think that it's tied to how you interact with each other."

"You five are bound together more closely than we ever were," Alexis explained.

Not really, Anne thought, their relationships were almost exact copies of the others. Alexis and Valora were twins, Order and Chaos. Life and Death were brothers, now brother and sister. The others were never related and remained as such. Where did the difference lie?

"You'll each need to examine the message and find where the answer is on your own," Xavier said. "The Council is ready to send you back. You'll be appearing where you are most needed."

"Be warned, however," Alexis added, "that you must not use the tower's power on Gaea. Abusing the authority given unto you will deteriorate the balance even further. You have been shown how to feel the currents of energy. You will need to keep a careful watch on your aspects."

Xavier sighed, as the magic swirled around them. "Tread softly, pinnacles, and leave no wake."

-oooOooo-

**AN**: Well, I apologize to those reading for the delay. I completely spaced posting last week. Thanks as always to Kimmae.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

So take your piece and leave me alone to die

_Esthar Palace, Esthar City, Esthar, March 3, __083 ALC, __12:05 Hours_

The bright blue crystal table gleamed under the artificial light, and her blood-red leather-clad legs looked distorted under the sheen. It was another day and another tedious war meeting. The plans from yesterday's meeting had been thwarted, leaving the General and the other chiefs of staff scrambling to stay a step ahead. Everyone was on edge, waiting for the break that would turn the tide and send the Galbadians packing.

It had been six months since the Galbadian Army landed on the shores of the Abadan Plains and began their long journey through the Sollet Mountains to Esthar City. At that point the objective had been to stall them while the Estharian Army gathered in the city. To that end Zell had come up with an idea to collapse the mountains on top of the encroaching army, while Selphie had figured out how they could do it. Using her second-sight, Nichole had marked where the Earth energies were weakest, and then Selphie's MG units had cast Quake on the area, and viola, instant rock slide.

Between the losses the army suffered from the cave-ins, the daily attacks from Irvine's Sharpshooters and Selphie's MG units, and the process of digging themselves out, the Galbadians had been kept plenty busy. Eventually Selphie's units had run out of mountains to move, however, and it was left to the Estharian Army to hold the pass the old-fashioned way.

That had quickly proven to be a fool's errand when the Galbadian Army moved the BGH251F3's—a newer, bigger, and meaner model of the old Iron Clad—to the head of their army. The tides had quickly turned to the Galbadian's favor and they had been approaching steadily ever since. Now they were almost at the City proper; the estimated time for their arrival at the gates was sometime that night. The current meeting was called to decide how they could stop the machines that were leading the Galbadians to victory.

She fidgeted in her seat while Esthar's Lieutenant General Drivig complained about his brigade's failure to destroy them. He was an outspoken man, somewhere in his early forties, and the Estharian General's second in command. The General, a gruff man in his mid-fifties by the name of McKinney, had served through Adel's reign and was infamous for being a staunch hater of Sorceresses everywhere.

Drivig slammed his fist against the table, as if trying to drive his point into its surface. "Those blasted machines have to be neutralized. They wiped out that entire platoon in one hit! We'll be sitting ducks if they pigeon-hole us in the city."

"We can't risk sending more men at them," General McKinney argued. "They're too well guarded. By the time the men break through, the cannon's charged and they're in the line of fire. It's a suicide mission. It shouldn't have been tried in the first place."

Squall spoke up. "I agree. I gave you the specs on them, informed you of their strength. A team of SeeDs fully equipped with GFs barely escaped with their lives against the older model during the Sorceress War. To attack head on, without magic, was a fool's move. I realize that you think I'm green, but I will not be ignored."

The General turned red, sputtered, then sighed. "So what's your plan then, what would you do?"

"They can't be remotely run. The operators are the weak point; disable them, you disable the machine. I recommend that we turn their weapons against them."

"How do you intend to do that?" Laguna inquired.

Squall brought up the digital map with the representation of the armies. "The Galbadians will eventually push the army back to the city gates. We'll use this to our advantage. We'll assemble the army here." He pointed to the area just outside of them.

"We'll be clay pigeons!" Drivig exclaimed.

McKinney shook his head, contemplating the map before him. "Let the boy finish."

Squall's eyes narrowed at the use of the word 'boy.' "I'll arrange for the sharpshooters, rangers, and MG units to be along the wall. They'll provide the distraction that will allow my teams to slip into the Galbadian ranks. When the enemy inside is neutralized, they'll take control and use the Iron Clads to wipe out the first platoons of the army behind."

"How do you propose to neutralize the drivers?" Kiros asked. "From the intel we received there would be too many for a standard team to eliminate."

"The Sorceress will be the one to carry out the first strike. She and I will be stationed here." Squall pointed to a spot slightly ahead of the main army.

"I don't like it," the General cut in. "Although I can't see a way around it, Drivig is right: we have to neutralize those machines. We haven't heard your opinion Merck, what say you?"

General Merck, an ancient, quiet man—Adel's right hand and McKinney's superior during her rule—spoke little, but when he did his words were always accepted.

"I say the young man has a better strategy than any of us old fools could come up with. Get the army assembled. Give those Galbadian bastards a taste of their own medicine."

"You heard the man, sound the order. Commander, get your SeeD ready," the General barked. The Major General, a man by the name of Linley, ran out of the room to relay the message. Zell left quickly behind him; he would tell those at Garden that the contingency plan was in motion.

It was one of many that the Command Team, now consisting of Selphie, Irvine, and Squall, had come up with. Zell had taken up the role of assistant to Headmaster Xu, and did most of the relay between the Command Team and the rest of Garden. Nichole had been reduced to a purely advisory role when her SeeD status had been stripped, so while she was included in most of the strategic meetings—and all of the meetings with Esthar—she wasn't actually considered one of them.

Her only relief from the monotony of her days were the sporadic meetings with Edea where she learned of Hyne's gift and how to best utilize the constant flow of energy supplied to her. She had mastered the barrier that held her power and emotions in check, relishing in the facade of control it gave her.

She'd never appeared so outwardly calm, so unemotional, in her life. The illusion helped her to get through the toughest days, the days where the loneliness and despair threatened to rend her stem from stern. Days where she watched Squall smile slightly at Zell and Selphie's antics, or laugh at Irvine's rather lewd jokes. Days where she knew she was unwelcome and unwanted.

Pain was her constant, but for the life of her, she couldn't say _why_ everything hurt so much. It was like a festering wound. She hadn't thought she was so dependent on others for her own happiness.

She was so lost in her thoughts she almost didn't notice the glimmer of power gathering in the hall, just beyond the doors. "Get down! Now!" she commanded, rising from her chair. The two guards stationed at the doors drew their weapons as she cast her shield on Squall and Laguna, adding Shell to them for good measure, before moving to stand at the end of the table. The flare grew stronger as those attending—finally realizing there was a threat—ducked under the table. The energy built, pulsing once before exploding in a blinding flash.

She recovered just as her missing family appeared in the doorway. Her knees shook with the effort of standing while she waved the all clear to those behind her. Tobias and Gavin grinned at her, Quistis and Anne (who was looking ready to pop) smiled. Adrian seemed contemplative.

She looked away, refusing to meet any of their eyes, pulling what composure she could find around her like a shield. She felt like an Iron Clad had run her over and then backed up to do it again. Hyne's power surged under her barrier, responding to her turmoil, searching for a way to escape.

"Who are you, and how did you get in here?" the General demanded.

"They're with us," Squall declared before the others could answer, "they're SeeDs. I apologize for the interruption, General."

Before the General could utter another word, a ragged looking, young Estharian messenger ran in through the open doors. He leaned on his knees for a moment, catching his breath before announcing, "A message for the General, Sir!"

"Well?!" the General prompted impatiently. "Spit it out, boy!"

"The retreat has been sounded, General. We've been forced back. General Caraway is leading the Galbadian Army into Esthar City!"

"Understood. You're dismissed, soldier," the General said, then turned to Squall. "Are your SeeD ready?"

"Yes, they should be in place by now. I'll need full command of Esthar's army to carry out the operation successfully."

"You'll have it," the General agreed. "Just don't disappoint us, boy."

Squall glared. "I won't," he bit out before turning to Nichole. "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

"Alright, let's head out," he said.

She followed him, carefully avoiding the others' gazes.

"Now wait a minute," Tobias said, when they were a ways from the chamber. "I know we've come to the party a little late but I'm sure if we knew what was going on, we could help."

Squall nodded. "I'll brief you on the way. We need to get to our position quickly. I'm not sure how long the Estharians will be able to hold the line without us."

Nichole noted how well Squall was taking the others' sudden reappearance with a great deal of envy. She felt like she was being force-fed into a shredder, but he had barely even blinked. She tuned Squall out, focusing on putting one foot before the other, as he told them of everything that had been going on.

"She's been practicing her powers." The reference to herself had her listening intently. "I wouldn't let them use her in any military operations until now. She's scary," Squall said with pride.

"She's always been scary, what clued you in?" Adrian muttered.

His voice, his words, snapped what tenuous control she had. She lost all sense of time, all thought, as her barrier fractured like a mirror met with a fist. Her buried emotions surged, pouring through the hair-line ruptures as the power behind them rushed for freedom.

She couldn't keep hold of them both, but refused to let either free. She stood alone in the center of her splintered, screaming mind as a voice, soft and seductive, whispered that if she just gave in, stopped holding it back, all of her pain would disappear.

Some rational part of her knew that if she let go of the power, let go of the seams, her world would shatter, but the voice was so soothing she soon forgot why she thought that at all. 'Yes! That's it, just give in, let go, let me in.'

"She'll be the first of a three pronged attack," Squall prattled on—his words sounding as if they were transmitting through a waterfall, "her job will be to disable the Iron Clads."

The familiarity of his voice grounded her in reality, while she searched desperately for a way out of the swirling maw of terror inside her mind, a way to repair what was broken. A spark of golden light flared in her vision and sensing no malice behind it, she reached for it.

Immediately calm surrounded her, enveloped her, allowing her—for the first time since she woke in the infirmary six months prior—to completely shut down her emotions, to gain the control she sought.

She sealed each errant emotion back behind her wall, the voice fading into the background, as Quistis asked, "How is she supposed to do that? It's suicide."

"She can do it," Squall said. "the machines are run by men; she can disable a man with a thought. After that it will be up to Selphie's MG units to provide cover for the infiltration teams. Once they're within the Galbadian ranks they'll take over the Iron Clads and use them against the army."

With everything back as it was Nichole dropped the line of power she held, embarrassed that she had needed it in the first place. She searched for the source, for a tangible link, but found nothing.

"We can't do any more than your average SeeD but we'll help in any way we can. I'd recommend putting Gavin and Quistis with the MG Units, Adrian with the medics and I can go anywhere I'm needed. Anne should probably stay out of the fight but I'm sure she'd help with organizing things," Tobias told Squall.

"That's fine. Anne can report to Zell; he'll have plenty for her to do off the front. The rest of you can go where you want. At this point we don't expect there to _be_ a battle. Nichole will be doing most of the work," Squall commented. "General McKinney is running a no casualties campaign. To honor that goal we've come up with a plan to use the Sorceress to force the Galbadians to surrender. The fewer losses on either side, the better."

"It's a good idea," Tobias said. "This war shouldn't be going on in the first place."

The sun shone warmly as they stepped out into the cool day. An air of panic clouded the palace entrance as soldiers and messengers ran about carrying out their orders and SUV's pulled in and out of the loading zone, packed with people and cargo alike. They were ushered rather hurriedly to an awaiting vehicle and stuffed unceremoniously into the back, before the automobile took off with a screech of tires.

During the ride Nichole listened absently while Squall and Tobias talked strategy, noting that while they kept sending furtive glances her way, the others were very quiet. She ignored them, and did her best to ignore the awkward atmosphere, thankful that the ride was short.

The noise was deafening when they disembarked at the edge of the city. Commanding officers barked out orders, the artillery battery loaded various ranged weapons, wounded filed by on stretchers, messengers ran back and forth; it was pandemonium.

When the order to retreat had sounded, the entire army had picked up and run back to the outskirts of the city, leaving the Galbadians trailing behind. Nichole could just make out the three great machines leading the wall of lesser mechanical monsters in their march toward victory.

As Squall had ordered, an armored car sat about two hundred feet in front of the main body of the Estharian army. A regiment of Estharian soldiers stood split to either side around it. Two SeeD Army squads were organized along its front. The infiltration teams huddled behind them, dressed in uniforms of red and blue that would easily be mistaken for the Galbadian's during the distractions.

Nichole wove through the ranks, Squall by her side, heading for where she would stand as the figurehead of the Armies. She noted the others as they split off, falling in line with various SeeD Army squads; they would be safe amongst the army. If she did her job right the Galbadians would never get that far. Squall and her were the only ones left by the time they reached their destination.

She vaulted onto the hood of the armored SUV, before moving to the roof. Squall followed her, turning to survey the troops. Nichole focused on the encroaching enemy. The Galbadian's numbers were impressive; the three cold machines leading them were intimidating. She needed to provide enough deterrence to end it quickly. Sorceress was a title many still feared, and she would play up that fear until the Galbadians turned tail and ran.

To that effect she wore a new set of leathers, ones created by Selphie specifically for this mission. Blood red in color, they encased every inch of Nichole like a glove. Selphie's original design was an outfit almost too short to call a dress, skimpier even than the yellow battle gear the girl favored. Thankfully, Squall had been on Nichole's side when she'd refused to put on the ridiculous get-up. She was supposed to look like Sorceresses throughout the ages; dangerous, seductive, terrifying, not like some two-bit tramp. Selphie had caved, thank Hyne, and redone the outfit so that it almost matched her black one; the differences being that the red one had long sleeves, and a neckline that plunged half-way to her navel.

She definitely stood out. Anyone who was looking for the Sorceress would be able to distinguish her from miles away. Squall offset her nicely in his usual black outfit; he looked every bit the dark knight—her knight—as everyone assumed him to be. He'd never given her a vow, but there was an unspoken agreement that he would protect her, and that was enough.

The machines—the slowest part of the Galbadian Army—were closing in on their firing range when Squall spoke to her. "We're ready, start whenever."

She smiled; it was the best news she'd heard all day. Her body physically hurt from the amount of power she was holding in. If she didn't give it an outlet soon, it would build up to the point where she would black-out and release it anyway.

She shielded herself and Squall before turning her focus to the machines. Pulling up her second-sight she looked for the dull metallic energy of the Iron Clads, and within them the bright flames of the soldiers.

Stretching out a tendril of power she anchored herself to the first machine and then _jumped_, teleporting across the space in the blink of an eye. It was one of her more useful abilities, although it only worked in short range.

The Galbadians sent up a cry of alarm, but already it was too late. "Got you now." She smiled maliciously, gathering each of the six soldiers into the web of her power, suspending them mid-air, and applying pressure against their delicate tracheas. The emotions teeming so close to the surface surged following the outpouring of power. Her barrier, already weakened, shattered under the force, leaving her overwhelmed, weightless, and breathless.

She lost her grasp on reality, as pure unadulterated energy filled every inch of her soul. She watched in sick fascination as the brightly burning flames were snuffed out; their energy taken up in the swirling eddies of Gaea's light.

She reached out into the void, searching for more bright flames, jumping to the next patch of dancing light. Six more shocked faces, six more lives extinguished. It was as simple as breathing. She shifted to the final target, the life-energy already in her grasp. They were no challenge, barely even sputtering as she smothered them. With nothing but the dull metallic energy surrounding her she dropped the second-sight, and jumped back to where she'd began.

There were more flames here, dancing with a steady flickering beat, but none so close or so bright as the violet blaze beside her. It was warm, she could feel the heat radiating into her; it would be so easy, so freeing to claim that warmth for herself. To cradle it until it extinguished under the might of her power.

She was almost touching that brilliant spark when a voice cried, "No! Get control of yourself!"

Griever...? She wondered, her psyche coming to the surface as if waking from a dream. Squall's worried eyes bore into her as the reality of what she had almost done crashed through her. The blood drained from her face even as Squall's arm came around her shoulders, holding her, keeping her from falling, because her knees could no longer bear her weight.

"Are you alright?" he whispered.

She nodded shakily, her words lost behind a flood of tears she just barely held back. _What was I doing?_ _What have I done?_

Clarity returned, leaving her shaken and disturbed. Her task had been to disable them, to knock them unconscious, and instead—caught up in Hyne's power—she had killed them all. Eighteen men… her throat closed in panic even as she gave the signal that the Iron Clads were clear.

Magic sizzled around her as the first spells meant to distract the Galbadian Army flew through the air. She gasped, taking in a breath, pushing her devastation back under the surface. There was no time for regrets now.

The SeeD teams slipped effortlessly into the smoke. Squall nodded at her, removing his arm, but staying close to her side, ready to support her again if necessary.

Bullets ricocheted off her shield as the Galbadians opened fire. Blizzards smashed into the ranks of soldiers surrounding her. Medics worked frantically to keep the wounded from falling. The artillery battery, led by Irvine's sharpshooters, joined the assault, aiming for the units of mechanical monsters that were the forefront of the opposition's army.

Nichole did her best to ignore the mayhem, following the progress of the SeeD teams with her second-sight until they reached their destinations.

Under the control of the SeeDs, the three great machines turned as one unit, releasing the energy they'd been gathering. Screams tore through the air as the Galbadians standing nearest to the cannons burned alive, leaving nothing but ash. Panic followed; those not directly in the line of fire ran for their lives. The stench of burning flesh rose on the wind, turning her stomach.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. This was meaningless, a tragedy of the worst nature. There was so much death, and all for nothing. There wasn't much left of the regiment closest to the weapons when the cannons shut off to recharge.

The GIM units turned as one, sending Thunder and Thundara arching out across the expanse between the armies. Electricity tore into the soldiers around her, jumping from body to body before being grounded out in the sand. Nichole cried out, allowing her power to flare in a burst of silver-red light. It exploded across the expanse, washing through the first of the Galbadian ranks.

It didn't give them more than a small jolt, but the display was impressive and she hoped it would be enough to have some of them rethinking marching against 'the Sorceress'. Selphie's MG units followed her signal, casting Quake at the edges of the mass, throwing the first waves of the charging enemy line back into the ones behind them. It was entertaining to watch them stumble, but wouldn't hold them for long. Squall looked at her and nodded. It was time to put the fear of Hyne into them.

Grinning maniacally she gathered the power of a Firaga in one hand and the might of Tornado in the other. Bringing the two together she cast them into the heart of the charging Galbadian Army.

The area exploded in a whirling inferno of wind and flame. Fire traveled across the lines, burning well after the other magics had spent themselves. Screams carried across the desert as the front lines broke entirely. Those that had been closest were decimated in the attack, and the few that had made it through were cut down by the waiting Estharian regiment. The dying and the dead lay indiscriminately in the blood-soaked sand, but still the Galbadians pushed forward.

Charged once more the Iron Clads let loose with their destruction, wiping out what remained of Galbadia's biomechanics. In the wake of the blast another line of soldiers broke rank and ran. She could see the General's caravan; hear the buzz of his subordinates shouting orders through screeching bullhorns. The General himself, however, was nowhere to be seen.

He would sound the surrender soon, if what was said about him was true. Laguna had said that he was a good man, a solid leader who cared for his people. With Commander Leonhart leading and the Sorceress as his tool, the Estharians would win this fight, there was no doubt. The only question that remained was whether it would be through fear or force.

Nichole drew upon her energy again, sending another whirlwind of flames for the Galbadians, aiming for the ranks still approaching. Screams rent the air as the MG units followed her lead, casting Tornados and Firagas into the heart of her inferno. Nichole caught the power, feeding her energy, Hyne's energy, into the mass until the spells merged. The magic burned, steadily growing until it was a wall of wind and flame spanning the width of Esthar City.

The Galbadians caught in the storm incinerated under the harsh heat, while those behind fled, screaming in terror. The fires raged on, fed by the wind, by the magic, until they could hold no more. Nichole held her breath as she let it go, watching the lights of the Galbadians scatter as the magic folded in upon itself before exploding.

Heat prickled across her senses, kissing her skin before dispersing into the air, completely spent. A swath of glass, black as night, marked its path. Nothing remained of the Galbadians caught in the blaze. She stood awed at the outcome of the spell. They'd theorized in plenty on just how that much magic would react, but the reality… it was devastating.

A horn sounded in the distance—the surrender had been issued. The Galbadians dropped their weapons as one and white flags waved in the air. Cheers started around her and soon the entirety of the Estharian army had taken up the call.

Whistles and catcalls abounded as the people who had shunned her, had feared her; celebrated in her glory, in her victory.

She wanted to sink into the earth and never return, wanted to scream at them to stop, to realize that they were cheering a monster. A creature who had just murdered hundreds without even breaking a sweat. She couldn't force the words out, couldn't bring them past her lips. Squall turned to her, grinning, as General Caraway marched toward the river of glass.

She abandoned her position, jumping off the SUV to meet the General halfway. She could feel Squall trailing behind her.

"I surrender on behalf of Galbadia," Caraway announced, head bowed. "As invaders in your country we ask only that you allow our young men to return to their families. The officers will accept any retribution you see fit."

"That won't be necessary," Laguna informed him, coming in from behind Nichole. She shielded him; the Galbadians may have been defeated, but she wouldn't risk his life, not after Cid.

"We accept your surrender," Laguna continued as he came to stand between her and Squall, "and would like to negotiate a treaty between the two great nations. In the meantime, your soldiers will be escorted out of the country. Commander," he addressed Squall, "have the men treat the Galbadian wounded. Take them to the plaza; an aid station is being set up there."

Squall nodded, already speaking orders into his comm device as he turned, heading back to the army. Nichole stayed put, unwilling to leave Laguna unprotected, but watching Squall's progress intently, listening with one ear as General Caraway and Laguna talked terms.

What they agreed upon was simple: The Galbadian Army would be escorted out of the country in platoons, a process that would start immediately. The wounded would be kept within the city until they were stable enough to travel, and the next meeting between Laguna and Caraway would take place in a couple of days. Until then, the General would be considered an esteemed guest within the city walls and housed at the palace.

When they were done talking Caraway surprised Nichole by turning to her. "You have won a great battle here today; the country of Galbadia extends her respect. You could have destroyed all of us, yet instead you chose to let us run and to surrender. For this I am grateful."

She wasn't sure what to say in response to such a misguided notion. She wasn't nearly so forgiving. If it had been up to her she would have crushed them all; she'd simply been following orders. She nodded once, unable to form the words to lie.

Where had her forgiveness gone? Where was her humanity? She felt very cold as they walked back to the bulk of the Estharian Army; alone amongst thousands of people.

She had killed hundreds of men that day, without care, with barely a thought. It had been so easy. She had almost killed her cousin, just as easily, with just as little consideration. Was that the price of the power she'd been given? Was she flawed now, in some indescribable way? A cruel, heartless monster?

She felt sick, nauseated by the thought, chills crawling up her spine. She was no better than Valora. Xavier had been wrong; those touched, those possessed by Chaos, were as one.

Squall joined her halfway through the ranks, his eyes a sea of questions she couldn't answer. She looked away, unable to bear his consideration. She didn't deserve it. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, sheltering her as they followed Laguna.

The war was over, the Galbadian casualties were already pouring in, helped by those they would have slaughtered. She walked on through it all, silently screaming in horror at what she had become.

The line of golden power that had been her salvation flared before her but she ignored it. She wasn't worthy of a way out. She wanted to drown, to lose herself in the whirlpool of despair.

She barely noticed as they were loaded into an SUV that would take them to the palace. She was sinking deeper and deeper, the spiraling emotions sucking her in, weighing her down, until she could see nothing... Nothing but the fear, the loneliness, the pain. Her last vision was of worried amber eyes—her eyes—before the vortex claimed her.

-oooOooo-

AN: Thanks to Kimmae!

Also I got a review! It kind of saddens me at how happy I was to get it, even when it turned out to be criticism. Oh well. To my anonymous reviewer, thanks for your comments, however, I'd need a further example. I'd be happy to hear your thoughts over a PM.

Any other reviews would be welcome.


	20. Chapter 20

**AN: Warning; mature themes of a sexual nature ahead. **

**Chapter Twenty**

I don't need you to keep my faith alive

_Balamb Garden, Esthar City, Esthar, March 3, 083 ALC, 19:00 Hours_

She was dizzy… disconnected. Her world spun around her. She couldn't feel her feet, couldn't tell if she stood on the ground or over empty space. She was vaguely aware of people moving around her, voices trying to get through to her, but she couldn't focus enough to answer.

"_You prayed for the pain to cease. I have given you what you wish,"_ a low voice called, soothingly, seductively.

Nichole shook her head. _What pain?_

"_Ah, perhaps you need a reminder of what it is I took from you." _

Suddenly a deep aching sadness roiled from under the surface.

_Who are you_, she thought, fighting the urge to weep.

The voice laughed. _"Someone who has come to give you what you desire. Take my gift, be at peace."_

Something was wrong… she could feel it, but what was it?

"_Perhaps you need a little more persuasion, hmm? Would you like to see what it is you're running from?"_

Pain, fierce and vast, swallowed her, sending her reeling. Anger, sadness, loneliness, fear, misery, hate, self-pity, envy; all battered her, piercing her heart. It bled, seeping into her soul, filling her until she no longer knew who she was.

"_I can take it all away,"_ the voice soothed in the background. _"You have nothing to fear, all will be as if it never happened."_

It couldn't be true. She was a monster, a fiend of the lowest order. She wasn't worthy of absolution, she didn't deserve to be free.

"_I can take away your pain, take away your sins, but to do this you must open yourself to me. Let me in."_

The offer was so tempting, the pain so great, but something nagged at her... the other voices called to her, their faces masked, yet so familiar.

_Who are you_? she wondered again.

"_I am your salvation,"_ the voice answered. _"I will deliver you from your own failings."_

Her failings… there were many. She failed to save Rinoa, failed to save Headmaster Cid, failed to keep her powers under control… had let them guide her into destroying the Galbadian soldiers. How was this entity going to take that away?

Nothing would bring back the lost. Not her self-pity, not her pain, and not some disembodied voice in her mind. She couldn't surrender; there were those still counting on her. Those she loved, those she would give her life for.

"_Go away_," she demanded, "_I don't need your help. I don't need you!_"

The voice screamed in fury, and the storm battered full force, pulling at her, trying to tug her into the abyss. She fought the tide, holding her ground as a flare of gold erupted in her vision.

She reached for it, anchoring herself in its embrace, watching as the swirling vortex receded.

"Is she coming to?" a voice asked, somewhere to her left.

"Yeah," someone else answered, "she should be coming out of it shortly."

"Thank Hyne," a third praised, "I thought we'd lost her."

The voices were off somehow, like they were coming through a heavy fog, and she struggled to make sense of them. Memories pursued her, images of a black hole and a voice cold as ice and sharp as a blade.

"Welcome back."

His voice was clear now, warm, as lucidity returned to her. The battle… they had won, but at what price? She had proven to everyone that she was the monster they feared.

"Nichi, look at me."

She turned to him, reluctantly, blinking to clear her vision and found herself staring into amber eyes, the same worried eyes that had followed her into the waking dream.

She looked away, trying to shut down the tears, the misery. Locking it behind her shields as Edea had shown her. Tobias sighed and she flinched.

"What happened?" she asked, thankful that her tone hadn't wavered.

"We're not sure," Gavin said—the voice that had come from her left. "You just kind of got this blank look and then became completely unresponsive."

"You were out of it for a couple hours," Tobias explained.

She noticed then that she was in the room she, Quistis, and Anne had shared before they'd been taken away—the room she'd avoided like the plague. Anne hovered next to Gavin, her arm clasped around his.

"I'm fine now," Nichole reassured them, hoping to take some of the worry from their  
eyes. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble."

"My lady." Gavin smiled. "Thou could nay be so uncouth as to account thy humble servant grave nuisance."

Nichole groaned, as Anne grinned. "Yeah, what he said," she agreed.

Tobias shook his head. "I'm not sure what he said, or what happened while we were away, but I'm sorry we couldn't have been here for you."

"Yeah," Anne said, "we all fought the Council when we learned of the plan to leave you here, but they wouldn't be swayed. Xavier even spoke to them on your behalf, for all the good it did."

"We couldn't change it," Gavin explained, "so we did the best we could to learn as fast as we could. We knew it was a horrible idea, but no one could have known how badly you would suffer."

She wanted to scream at him. What did they think would happen? It wasn't his fault though, not Gavin who had done nothing but support her, it was hers. She'd come to rely on him, on all of them too much, so much that she had been reduced to a shadow of herself when they'd been ripped from her.

It was pathetic, she was pathetic. She was everything she had never wanted to be.

"You shouldn't have worried," she lied through her teeth, unable to tell them the truth, to admit to how useless she was. "I was fine."

"I know that isn't true," Tobias announced, shaking his head. "I've had to bail you out twice already. How many more times do you think can you fall into despair before Valora claims you?"

"Valora…?" she asked, confused. "What does she have to do with this?"

She was unwilling to address the fact that he had pulled her out, was the source of the golden light. She searched for the link that bound them, surprised to find it open so that emotions flowed only from her; a one-way street. She glared at him, angry that he thought he had the right to invade her in such a way.

"I'm sorry," Tobias said, "it was necessary. Valora has been attempting to possess you, the same as she did to the other Sorceresses. Your angel heritage gives you some protection from her magic, but it's only enough that she isn't able to take you over without your consent."

"What?" she asked incredulously.

"The Council was aware of Valora's attempts but since you seemed to be fighting them off well enough they chose not to interfere. They did acknowledge, though, that when we appeared in your carefully constructed world, we could tip the scales in Valora's favor. So they taught me how to open the link and monitor for when your emotions are at their peak, when Valora would make her attempts."

Nichole shook her head, feeling angry, violated, and betrayed.

"Nichi, please," Tobias beseeched, and suddenly he was open to her and she could feel his remorse, his sorrow. "Please don't be angry, I was worried about you, for you. It killed us to leave you behind, to know that you would suffer so much, and I felt... I had to, to know what you were going through."

She nodded as tears filled her eyes, spilling over. He sat next to her, pulling her into his arms, his own eyes wet with unshed tears.

"The Council said that they were the ones who placed this link, when you first came to the orphanage. To keep history from repeating itself. That only by feeling how our opposite feels can we understand. Valora hates Alexis, you see, and they... the Council thought that you could hate me, because I couldn't understand what you'd gone through, what you are. I wasn't supposed to be able to shut it down. I wasn't supposed to abandon you. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you, Nichi."

"Oh, Toby, don't be so hard on yourself," she cried. "There was no way you could have been there for me, link or not. You don't understand me, didn't understand why I hurt so much, and I didn't understand how you could be so cold. The Council is right. If the link hadn't been there, if we hadn't been so tied together in the beginning, we could have easily fallen into hating each other. For everything you are that I am not, I love you, but if I didn't have the knowledge of what drove you, it could have very easily gone the other way."

Tobias nodded against her cheek. "I love you too…" he said, then after a moment added, "I'm just glad they chose emotions instead of thoughts, could you imagine?"

Nichole laughed, sputtering, "Yeah, that would be embarrassing. Emotions are bad enough."

"Oh! You're both going to get a little wet," Anne cried, crawling onto the bed and throwing her arms around the both of them, sobbing.

Nichole smiled, patting her on the back as Tobias moved to let her have some space.

"I'm sorry," Anne cried, "it's the hormones, I can't help it."

Nichole doubted that Anne would appreciate her pointing out that she'd always been just a touch dramatic, so she held her tongue.

"Well, since we're all dog piling here..." Gavin said, coming over to them.

"Ah, no," Tobias protested, trying to extricate himself, "you can just take my spot."

Nichole laughed a little at Tobias' horror, letting go of him. Gavin just shrugged and took his place, wrapping his arms around her and Anne. "Your loss," he said.

Anne smiled through her tears. "I missed you so much," she told Nichole.

Nichole returned her smile. "I missed you too, both of you," she added, meeting Gavin's shining eyes.

Her tears started all over again as Gavin pulled her cheek against his chest, kissing her hair, and Anne held on to her side. They were back... That was all that mattered now, they were back. She wouldn't be alone any more. The thought allowed her the strength the stem the flow of tears, to wipe away the remnants of her sorrow and look at them both with dry eyes.

"So," Gavin said, grinning, "now that we've gotten the obligatory mush out of the way, what did we miss?"

Nichole laughed, hugging him tightly before letting go. He always knew just what to say.

"Nothing really," she admitted, as he helped Anne off the bed, "just a bunch of old men sitting around, wondering what to do."

"Sounds entirely enthralling," Tobias announced.

"Entirely," she agreed. "Besides the excruciatingly boring war meetings, nothing else happened at all."

As much as she had been fighting her own internal battle, the world had kept right on spinning without her. At the time it had just marked how lonely she was. It was funny: before the others had left she'd never considered herself a 'people person'. On the take them or leave them scale, most days she'd quite happily leave them, but somehow the forced isolation had been her undoing.

"I'm sure there's more," Gavin said, "but you can spill later. Adrian is waiting to see you. He said he didn't want upset you like he did in the palace."

Tobias nodded. "He's been even more impossible than usual to live with. We'll have to meet eventually and fill you in on what we learned but it can wait. Go easy on him, he's been pretty miserable."

Anne grinned. "He chickened out about coming in, but he'll be in his room. I think he wanted a bit more privacy for when he tells you just how much he missed you."

"I doubt it," Nichole answered, climbing off the bed, "but I suppose I have to face him sooner or later."

Later, much later would be preferable, but never was an option she was considering when she left the others. It wasn't that her feelings had changed; no… it was that they were still too strong. In the beginning—after her friends had first left her—she hadn't been able to even think of Adrian without objects flying off on their own accord. The memories had been too fresh, and ultimately, too painful.

She hadn't known what to believe. The entirety of the time spent with him that day had felt like it was a dream. She was afraid that if she examined it too closely it would disappear, fade like a ghost with the dawn. Things tended to explode at that point, so she'd been forced to stop thinking about it altogether.

To have him back—to hear him say something just so… Adrian—had pushed her right into all of the emotions she'd been repressing and made it necessary for Tobias to rescue her. Edea had warned her—had kept on warning her—that to bottle her feelings would ultimately backfire on her, but she hadn't listened. Hadn't been able to find any other way to control them, and in consequence had almost fallen into Valora's trap… twice.

She was outside of his door before she even realized that was where she was headed. Looking at the bright blue door, panic welled up. She wasn't ready for this; she would never be ready for this. What was she doing?

She didn't have time to answer herself before the door opened. Adrian looked… well, gorgeous as usual, but also tired, as he gestured for her to come in. Her heart sank as he looked her over in silence.

"I'm sorry," he said finally. She blinked in surprise; those weren't the words she had been expecting.

"About what?" she asked.

"For leaving you."

She was floored… Adrian, the man who never asked for forgiveness, was apologizing for something he couldn't have controlled.

"As if you had a choice?"

"No," he agreed, shaking his head, "there was no choice, but I was afraid you'd blame us anyway… blame me."

Who to blame hadn't even crossed her mind. She didn't appreciate that he thought she was so… so petty as to blame him.

"No, I don't blame you," she informed him, her voice taking on a steel edge, "I'm glad you guys are back. Excuse me, I have to go, I'll see you around."

She had cried more in one day than she had in months and still she couldn't stop the impending flood. She needed to get out, to get away. She didn't look back as she left, traversing the halls in record time, heading unerringly for the Training Center, for the little balcony there; a place that had probably been a prime area for those seeking a little privacy during Garden's pre-war days, but that now lay deserted.

The monsters in the Training Center skittered away from her, avoiding her wrath as if they knew she would prove too much for them to handle, and as usual she made it to the balcony un-assaulted. The familiar gray stone was comforting in a strange way. This was her territory; no one would bother her here. No one would bear witness as she fell apart and her power, raw and angry, scorched the stone.

The tears flowed. She collapsed to her knees, leaning against the stone railing, giving in to the misery that haunted her. She watched the void open beneath her feet, as it beckoned her closer. It was hard to resist, the pull was so strong, but she knew now what awaited her at the end of that path. She turned away, cutting off her link to it, releasing all of the power battering away at her shields.

She felt warm, wrapped in a comfort so simple, yet so intense. She didn't have time to question its presence before every emotion she'd kept pent up for so long rushed out. She could feel the air around her sizzle as bitter, harsh, wracking sobs were torn from her, echoing off the surrounding stone.

It seemed like days before her sobs quieted, before the air cooled. She felt… empty. Hollow in a way that was both a relief and a torment. For the first time in six months she was herself again.

Awareness of her surroundings returned gradually, light and sounds flitting in and out. One thing remained, however: the warmth still surrounded her, protecting her against the chill of the night air. When her brain finally registered that it shouldn't be there, her eyes popped open in surprise.

All at once her senses returned. The air was steaming slightly around her, feeding off the heat of the power she'd released, but it was still cool. The warmth wasn't coming from it, it was coming from someone else.

She was clutched to a warm chest, could hear the rhythmic heartbeat. A glance revealed that it was Adrian. She pulled away, embarrassed; he always seemed to catch her during her most vulnerable moments. She expected him to say something, but as the silence stretched on she looked up, searching for the answers she needed.

His eyes were closed, unresponsive. If she hadn't felt his heartbeat earlier she would've thought she'd killed him. She cursed softly, wondering what had possessed him to hold on. The discharge of power during her outburst would have easily killed any other man. He was stupid to walk into the middle of something like that.

She shook him slightly, wondering if she should take him to the infirmary, laughing a little at the thought. Even before he'd turned out to be Life incarnate, he'd been the best Healer the Gardens had seen. It wasn't likely he'd ever been on the business end of an Infirmary before.

Of course she would be the one to put him there.

She shook a little harder as his breathing normalized. "Ugh," he groaned, his eyes cracking open, "I want the number of that train." She giggled, and then laughed, great heaving laughs. It was just so… Adrian.

She laughed until she was crying again, tears running down her cheeks as Adrian held her closer, burying her head into his chest. She clutched at his jacket, taking the comfort he offered greedily as she tried to stem the flow. The tears were different this time, just an effect. She wasn't even sure why she was crying. It was just such a relief to do so after months of holding everything in, afraid that if she gave in she would cause some sort of catastrophe.

It was some time before she got herself together, and all the while Adrian held her, rubbing soothing circles on her back.

"Better?" he asked.

She nodded, a little afraid that if she spoke she'd find herself alone and unwanted again, that it all would have been a dream. It was an irrational fear, but nothing of what she'd done that day was based on reason so the prospect of starting to think sensibly now was slim.

"You pack quite a punch," he said with a grin.

"You shouldn't have followed me," she muttered, looking away from him.

The fresh scorch marks still smoldering on the stone were enough to turn her stomach. She closed her eyes, willing herself not to think of them, of what she could have done to him.

"I needed to talk to you," he explained, "I wanted to… well… Why is this always so hard?"

She smiled. "We're just not easy people."

He laughed, a short sardonic noise. "No, we aren't, but I want to be. I want to be there for you, to be with you. I…" he paused, searching her face, her eyes.

Hope fluttered almost painfully against her ribs. "I… I thought I heard you say you loved me."

He cupped his hand under her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes. "I did… do."

If it had possessed the ability her heart would have pounded out of her chest and done back flips right there on the floor. As it was, joy choked her so hard she could barely breathe. She hadn't imagined it, it had been real.

"I love you too," she admitted.

Adrian's smile was brilliant in its glory and she wondered how she hadn't been blinded by it. Then he was kissing her and all coherent thought flew out of her mind like smoke. She returned his gestures with intensity, drunk on the sensations he instilled in her. She was cold and hot all at once, afraid and fearless; out of control and unable, unwilling to care.

She needed more, needed him to touch her, to finish the promise of what he offered. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling herself so she was flush against him, straddling his lap.

A shiver of pleasure went straight up her spine before it warped into a jolt of fear as her center rested against his hardness. Heat permeated through the layers of clothes in between and she gasped, fighting with ugly images, twisted with the pleasure she still felt.

She refused to pull away, trying desperately to lock away the hurt, the violation of those moments. _Would it always be like this?_ she wondered. Would every moment of pleasure she had be tinged with the pain, the shame of the past?

The spell was broken. Reality invaded with a cruel persistence. She was sitting in the middle of a burnt out balcony, the destruction she had caused all around her. The evening air was chilly against her uncovered skin, the blood red leather exposing more of her to the elements than she was comfortable with. Underneath her, Adrian's body burned with heat.

He was searching her face, looking for answers she didn't know if she could give. His hands were still on her, clenched around her ribs, his thumbs just barely brushing the undersides of her breasts as she breathed. She could feel his desire plainly, still pressed as it was against her, and she hadn't been imagining the warmth, but couldn't tell if it was his or her own.

She realized with a little surprise that taking the time to observe, to step outside of the overwhelming feelings, had banished the past unlike anything else could. This was different, this time was different. Adrian loved her, would never hurt her, and she… she wanted… needed to feel whole again.

Adrian sighed and before she could protest moved his hands to her hips, lifting her off of him. She stood shakily, waiting for him to find his feet, her decision weighing heavily in her mind. She knew what she wanted, what she needed, now all she had to do was find the courage to ask.

It was easier said than done, she decided, as she looked up into his questioning eyes. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to have you stop."

He shook his head. "I know you well enough to know that you were frightened. I don't want you to fear me, or anything that happens between us."

His words, his thoughtfulness, gave her the nerve she needed to continue on. "I'm not afraid… not anymore. I want this, I want you. I need you. Can I stay with you tonight?"

-oooOooo-

"Can I stay with you tonight?"

The words, her words, just about knocked him flat. Did she realize what she was saying, what she was offering? Was he really what she wanted? Of course there was only one answer, one path to take.

"Of course..."

Her smile was a little shaky as he led her off of the little burnt out balcony and back to the privacy of his newly assigned room. He punched in the code without thought, still too much in awe to pay attention to anything but her. As the door slid shut behind him he couldn't help the small breath of relief he released. He'd half expected her to come to her senses, to realize that she was going to spend the night with him—her most hated enemy—and run screaming in the other direction.

That she hadn't… well…

She smiled at him and all of his previous thoughts floated away. "Make love to me," she said, pleadingly, so softly he thought he might've imagined it.

He must have misunderstood, misheard somehow, but her eyes spoke volumes. Fear, love, trust; all radiated from the windows of her soul and he knew then that he was hopelessly under her spell. He would do anything she asked of him; could refuse her nothing.

He didn't speak as he trailed one hand over her pale cheek, bringing her lips to meet his. He took it slow, running his hand along her back, her sides, trying to familiarize her with his touch even as his blood sang in his veins and she—impatient as ever—did her best to drive him to insanity.

He was divested of all of his clothing long before she was in the same state. He had expected the fear that flashed into her eyes when she saw him for the first time, but he hadn't anticipated the determination, or the tentative hands that reached out to touch and tease. It undid him; it was more than he could bear and still make this an experience she'd want to repeat.

She seemed more subdued as he removed the last of her clothing, drinking in the sight before him. She wasn't perfect in the highest definition of the word, but she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. She was his perfection.

When they joined, magic flared, hot and sweet, and something within him clicked into place. This was right, it was like coming home. Woman, Sorceress, angel, Chaos incarnate, in all her forms, in all her glory she was his and he… he was irrevocably hers.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-one**

And I know now what trouble can be… And why it follows me so easily

_Balamb Garden, Esthar, Esthar City, March 6, 083 ALC, 10:23 Hours_

Sunlight pierced the haze that clouded her brain. Warmth surrounded her, enveloped her in a way she was loath to put into words. She felt… happy.

Her senses returned slowly as the last bits of sleep abandoned her and she remembered in detail what had conspired to have her waking in Adrian's bed, his body intertwined with hers.

If anyone had told her two years ago that she would wake up one morning in such a situation, she would have laughed herself silly. If they'd gone further and said she would enjoy it, even want to be there, she would have had them committed to an insane asylum.

The thought was insane… her, Nichole… and Adrian, together.

Yet, even as it was ridiculous, it didn't diminish the feeling that had encompassed her ever since his body joined with hers. This was _right_… she couldn't think of a better description. Her mind shied away from using such words as fate when she knew such things existed.

She rolled from underneath his arm, smiling at his groan of protest as she turned. His features, so often found in a sneer, were relaxed, almost angelic in sleep. She traced her fingers over his nose, his lips, chiding herself for the anxiety that was sparked by the gesture.

Some small part of her still feared that she would find that this had all been some cruel twist, a cosmic joke. That he would wake up and come to his senses. 'Thanks for the lay; you can show yourself out now.' She could just hear his harsh words.

She closed her eyes. Even the thought of his dismissal had tears forming. His fingertips hesitantly brushed her cheeks, tracing them before moving away. She caught his hand in hers, opening her eyelids, all thoughts of rejection flying out the window.

"Good morning, love," he whispered, giving her a quick kiss.

"Good morning."

He pulled his hand gently from hers, rolling onto his back to stretch. She admired his form, studying him in the daylight. She hadn't really looked at him before, taken the time to appreciate his body. The fear of the act, the memories of the past, had assaulted her at every turn.

She'd had a distinct feeling of déjà vu when the thought had crossed her mind that he wouldn't fit. The knowledge that it could be forced to do so hadn't been any comfort. It wasn't as she expected though. The pain never came; instead, as overused and trite as the phrase was, it had been magic.

The bed dipped under his weight and she took his offered hand, letting him pull her up into his arms. The phone rang, and they both jerked in response. What was she doing? She was naked in the middle of Adrian's room, with an equally naked Adrian, and she hadn't considered anybody but herself since the day before.

Her first thought was that Squall was going to be furious, and after that it didn't much matter. The traitorous part of her wanted nothing more than to march over, hang up the phone and take Adrian right back to bed.

But as Adrian went to answer it, she knew she couldn't. She headed for the bathroom and the shower as Adrian said, "Hello," and "Yeah, she's here."

She debated shutting the door, but finally left it cracked so that she could hear the one-sided conversation.

"Fine." Adrian said. "We'll be there in half-an-hour."

He hung up the phone and called to her. "Looks like it's time to pay the piper; the rest of the gang is waiting for us at Quistis' place. Anne said she'd come by with some clothes for you."

Nichole nodded vaguely as she turned on the water. Adrian was leaning against the sink, fully clothed, when she was done with her shower. He leaned over and flushed the toilet before studying her, approval written all over his face. She blushed, snatching a towel off the rack to cover her body.

He smirked at her attempts at modesty while she dried. When she was finished she tried to step around him, but he reached out, pulling her in.

"So beautiful…" he whispered, his lips meeting hers. For a moment she blushed, then the sensations outweighed the embarrassment and she returned his kiss passionately. He growled low in his throat as he pulled away. "We don't have time for what I'd like to do to you. I really just came in to let you know that Anne dropped your clothes off; they're on the end of the bed. I didn't expect to get so distracted."

She nodded, not really sure what to say. She almost wanted him to keep going, time be damned, but an exaggerated form of guilt and her own fears kept her from saying so.

Once she was dressed and her hair up, they left the room, silence reigning between them.

Try as she might, she just couldn't think of anything intelligent to say. Her brain was stuck somewhere between 'you're incredible' and 'I love you,' both of which would have come out sounding dumb, even if she managed not to stutter.

Before she knew it, she was at Quistis' dorm. She punched in the code, taking a deep breath as the door slid open. The thought of seeing Squall was particularly terrifying. Everyone else was bad enough, but only Squall, the Squall that knew who she was, who Rinoa had been to him, would know how much the past six months had cost her, had cost him. He had been showing signs of getting his memory back the moment the others had come back and she really wasn't looking forward to what his reaction might be.

A pinch on her butt had her whirling to glare at the offender. Adrian grinned at her and she blushed, realizing that she had been standing just inside the doorway, staring off into space like a moron.

"Sorry," she muttered to the room in general.

Anne smiled. "Woolgathering when you should be spilling details, how dare you!"

Nichole shook her head. "Huh? What details?"

Gavin sighed. "Actually, please, spare us. I think we know too much already. Your poor brother just about had an apoplexy."

"What are you talking about?" she demanded, studying Tobias. He seemed calm enough now, if a little stiff. She felt for the link, finding that it was still open.

After no one offered an explanation Quistis cleared her throat. "Um, there isn't really a delicate way to put this…"

"Girl," Anne interrupted, "the towers kind of… well, I guess you could say _resonated_ last night. Everything kind of moved into place."

"What?" Nichole asked, wondering what this had to do with her brother or her. "When did that happen? How come I didn't feel it?"

Anne laughed. "Honey, if you didn't feel it, he must not have done it right."

Adrian looked rather offended while everyone else looked horrified. It was left to Quistis to spell it out for her. "Nichole, you blew the link open when you participated in coitus..."—at Nichole's blank look and Anne's face-palm Quistis clarified—"err... had sex, and somehow the towers reacted. We all felt it to some degree, but your poor brother got the brunt of it. He just about had a heart attack."

The blood rushed from Nichole's head. "WHAT!?" she screeched, turning red. She looked to Adrian.

"She's not as closely tied to her tower," Gavin said, "maybe that's why she didn't feel it."

"I didn't know," Adrian whispered.

Maybe that was the feeling she'd gotten, the whole rightness that she'd stupidly attributed to the act. She was mortified all over again; everyone had felt something, and Toby… poor Toby. "Hyne, Toby, I'm so sorry…"

He shook his head. "Don't be. It was just emotions as it normally is. I was just surprised, and then the tower chimed in and it was… well… shocking."

Anne nodded. "Yeah, that's never happened before, obviously, or you all would have felt something." She patted her belly.

"Now that I'm over the shock, I think I know what it was," Tobias explained. "The writing in our towers, the whole, 'when all towers are as one'. It must be a more literal translation."

"Of course!" Gavin exclaimed. "I talked to Destiny a little when we were up there. She said something about love being the answer to everything. I thought she was a little off her rocker, but with this…"

"We've found balance within ourselves, within our group, because each of us is tied to each other, to the others, by love, that's sweet." Anne explained. "Kinda funny though, that the towers chose that particular moment to announce the fact. They have a wicked sense of humor."

Anne's reasoning made Nichole feel a little happier; it seemed better than the towers being 'as one' because they'd had sex.

Ding, Ding, Dong… "Nichole Skye, please report to the docking station. I repeat, Nichole Skye, please report to the docking station. Thank you."

She said goodbye to the others and headed in that direction, thankful for the distraction.

Zell was waiting for her at the small balcony on the second floor. It had been converted into a semi-permanent bridge between Garden and Esthar City. His teeth were chattering, his arms crossed over his chest in an attempt to warm himself.

"Damn, you wouldn't think the desert would be this cold."

She shook her head, not wanting to point out that technically this was a high desert, and they were lucky not to have rain or snow. "So what's this about?" she asked, smiling as he shifted from foot to foot as a particularly strong gust of wind tore through the dock.

"I can answer that," Squall chimed in, coming up behind her. "Our presence has been requested for the peace meeting between Galbadia and Esthar."

"I expected something of the sort, since the whole thing started as part of the SeeD hunt. I wonder how Caraway is going to present it; he obviously no longer speaks for all of Galbadia," she pointed out.

"No time like the present to find out," Squall answered, guiding them to the waiting car.

The drive to the palace was painfully silent and thankfully very short. She was relieved when they met the honor-guard that would escort them to the Council Chambers. The room looked as it had every time they'd come and she claimed her usual seat after nodding her greeting to President Laguna.

General Caraway was already seated across from them. She was relieved that the other two men from the last meeting weren't present. It would have dampened the mood considerably. It was going to be hard enough as it was.

"Welcome, delegates—" Laguna cleared his throat. "—we've arranged this meeting as a sign of peace between Galbadia and Esthar. General Caraway, we would like to hear your side of the story, if you please."

The General sighed. "Thank you, President Loire. My orders were to secure the Gardens by any means necessary. After months of the Gardens eluding capture, the order came in that I was to head an effort to negotiate their surrender. Plans were made that if the negotiations were unfavorable, extreme measures would be taken to ensure the capture of the Gardens."

He shook his head, his eyes hard, yet sad. "I had no knowledge of the plan to assassinate Cid Kramer. If I had, I would not have gone through with it. Cid was a good man, a good soldier, and my friend. No matter my feelings about SeeD, I wouldn't have wished his death for anything, and I'm terribly sorry for his loss. The world is a colder place without him."

"Thank you," Squall acknowledged quietly.

Caraway nodded to him before continuing. "I found out after the fact that the plan to invade Esthar had been approved by the President. A subordinate of mine carried out the attacks on Minde Island under direct orders of the Galbadian Cabinet. When I returned to Galbadia, I was informed that it was my duty to see that Esthar City fell, and that all who harbored the SeeD terrorists were brought to justice.

"I had my doubts about what we were doing, about the orders, but I felt it was best that I was in charge, as my subordinate has a different view on collateral damage. I led the army through the mountains and into the desert surrounding Esthar City where we were defeated by the Sorceress."

"Which brings us to the present," Laguna added. "I've allowed the majority of your troops to pass through the Salt Lake and over Horizon Bridge into Galbadia. Those remaining are still being treated for their injuries. The human casualties have been estimated at less than five hundred, six percent of the force brought into this country."

"I know," the General acknowledged. "I've been kept appraised of the numbers. I appreciated the tactics employed by the Estharian Army, SeeD, and the Sorceress. As invaders of your country, you had the right to do much more damage, and on behalf of the Galbadian people, I thank you."

"The thanks are unnecessary," Laguna said, waving it off. "In a war that didn't make sense from the beginning it was only natural to try to find a solution that caused the least amount of turmoil. Which is part of why we've brought you here; we are concerned about the situation in Galbadia, and how we can best facilitate the Gardens' return to their homes. As happy as Esthar is to host them, a large amount of people have lives that they would like to return to."

Caraway steepled his fingers before him on the glass table. "This is where we step out of the realm of my authority. I am in charge of the invasion of Esthar, and thus have the wherewithal to call its halt, but the SeeD Crusade is another matter altogether."

Zell made a noise as if to intervene but was hushed by Squall's hand on his arm, and the General continued. "I have had my doubts from the beginning as to the validity of the SeeD hunt, but that is neither here nor there. Bottom line is that although I have control of the army here, they are now on their way home, and as soon as they touch Galbadian soil they are under the jurisdiction of the Cabinet."

"So you can't call off the hunt," Squall surmised.

"I have every reason to believe that my life will be forfeit as soon as I return to Galbadia," Caraway explained. "Valora is a harsh ruler; she does not take failure kindly. Whatever the reasons behind it, she will not give up her Crusade, and will likely deploy the army again under new leadership."

"Wonderful…" Zell murmured.

Nichole had known when Laguna had released the Galbadians that it couldn't be that simple, but she hadn't thought of the possibility that they would be doing it all over again. It was disheartening. It wouldn't be as easy to get the Galbadians to surrender a second time… and a third, or a fourth…. It was unthinkable.

"We'll have to take the fight to her," Laguna concluded quietly. "we can't continue to fight Galbadia on Estharian soil."

"No," Squall barked. "Esthar has no place in this. This is our problem and our fight; you've done more than enough already."

"Squall is right," Nichole agreed. "To include the countries at this point would be foolish. The problem is no longer Galbadia or Esthar, it is one woman. SeeD can handle the president." She could handle the president; no one else was going to die over this… this petty bullshit.

"But," Caraway asserted, "If SeeD assassinates the President, you would be playing right into her hands. The people of Galbadia have reason to believe the nonsense she's been spouting: that SeeD are nothing but contract killers. I'm afraid that with the last Sorceress War weighing so heavily in the people's minds, the SeeD Crusade would continue, possibly even gain momentum after her death."

"Which is where Esthar can help," Laguna interjected. "The President has brought war to our soil, made a play for power here. We can retaliate without any consequences for SeeD. If we remove the President from power through war and politics, we can put someone more suited to lead in her place and fix the problem permanently."

"How fast do you think that would work?" Squall asked. "My people have been on the run for more than half a year. They want their lives back."

"With the General's cooperation, we think it can be done in a matter of a week. Our plan is simple: we will openly support General Caraway as he leads his troops into taking over the capital," Laguna explained. "A coup from within will allow SeeD to take care of President Valora unhindered. The General will take up the presidential title and lead Galbadia into a new era, hopefully one of peace and prosperity for its people."

Caraway sighed. "A noble goal, but I have no desire to be president. I abhor politics. If it hadn't been for Cid, I would have refused to head the delegation for Galbadia in the first place."

"I realize that," Laguna stated, "but you see, that's exactly why you'll be perfect for the job. Galbadia has been ruled by petty, bickering politicians for too long. Your people, the common people, have no sense of true democracy, and forcing them into this farce has led to too many bad decisions, too many wars." He sighed. "It's time Galbadia went back to a life-long leader, but this time it will be one the nations trust. One who has seen war, and isn't likely to start another one over something superfluous."

General Caraway shook his head. "I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't think I can help you."

"You have been my friend since Galbadia's glory days," Laguna implored. "It's time to restore the country to where it was before Deling became power mad."

Caraway sighed. "Even if I were to agree to this proposal of yours, I fear a coup of that magnitude may be a little harder to execute than you think."

"You're underestimating the country's loyalty to you," Laguna declared. "Every man in Galbadia is compelled to serve three years in the Army. Every man who has ever served under you knows how you treat your troops, your subordinates. There is no doubt that most of the people will support you. That is why you are the best choice."

"Perhaps you are correct, perhaps not, but since you argue your point so effectively and I doubt you will take no for answer, I suppose I could try. You are right; my people have been led by power-hungry politicians long enough." Caraway leaned back in his chair. "Explain your plan."

"It's quite simple," Kiros stated. "We'll arrange for you and your soldiers to arrive in Galbadia within the week, at which time you'll announce publicly that the attack on Esthar was an unwarranted political gamble that cost an already war-torn country more of its people's lives. In the meantime, Laguna and our staff will be working with those loyal to you inside the cabinet. Your takeover will be quick and painless for the Galbadian people. While they are busy cheering their new president, SeeD will take care of Valora Hart by any means necessary."

"Sounds simple enough," Squall agreed. "I'll arrange to have the team in place. Let me know if you need anything else from me or Garden and I'll see to it as well. Otherwise, I have plans to make and people to return home." Squall rose to his feet and Zell followed almost instantly.

"That's the spirit," Laguna said. "Let us know if you require anything, and thank you for your assistance."

Squall nodded abruptly and Nichole rose to follow him out the door. She wasn't sure she liked the plan they'd come up with. She had this nagging doubt things wouldn't go the way they wanted them to. They were dismissing just how powerful and, well… _mad_ Valora was, but it wasn't like she could say 'hey, you really think a psycho angel will say, "I give up."?'

She could only hope that Squall knew what he was getting into. Hyne knew she wasn't sure anymore.

The same transport was awaiting them as they stepped back into the cold. Zell seemed oblivious to the uncomfortable silence, making comments on and off which received grunts and short nods in reply.

It wasn't until after they'd disembarked at Garden that Squall spoke. "Sorceress Nichole, if you would follow me to my office, there's something we need to discuss."

She nodded, unsure of what to say in response. Squall was so rarely formal, and since the situation didn't truly call for it, he was either very nervous or very angry. Either way her nerves twanged as they rode in silence to the third floor. Zell gave them a little wave as he headed for the Headmaster's office to report to Xu.

Squall clutched at his scar as his office doors slid shut behind them. He paced a few steps before whipping around to her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he spat.

"Tell you what?"

"Tell me what I had forgotten!" he cried. "I can see that you had no control over my memory loss, but I would have thought you would have at least attempted to get through to me!"

She could do nothing but flinch. What was she supposed to say? There was nothing she could have said to make him remember. He would have thought her crazy, telling him of this life he didn't know. Somehow, she didn't think that was the answer he was looking for.

"I don't appreciate being played with like a puppet on strings!" he yelled.

Anger overrode everything as hurt welled up. "Neither do I," she hissed, fighting to control the power rising within her. "Don't you dare blame me for this. If you want to rail at someone, take it up with the bastards that did it, but all in all, don't even talk to me about what a raw deal you got because... You. Don't. Know. Shit!" she punctuated every word, gritting her teeth to keep from screaming at him.

"I know." He sighed, running a hand over his face. "I know… I'm not angry with you."

"You know," she said, "I missed you most of all. You were right there… right next to me. I could reach out and touch you, but it wasn't the real you."

She shook her head as she lost the battle not to cry. He reached out, pulling her into his arms. "I'm sorry."

It was enough to have her break down. She sobbed against him, burrowing into his hug. He patted her on the back awkwardly until she calmed enough to back away.

"I'm sorry," she sniffed, "I didn't want to fall apart all over you."

Squall shrugged. "I'm told that's what family is for."

She laughed. "Yeah, I guess so. I'm glad you're back."

"So am I."

"Well," she said, "now that we're past the sappy crap, we should probably get down to business."

He laughed a little, as she'd wanted him to, and the heavy mood was lifted.

"Yeah… any problems with Laguna's plans?"

"No, not really, but the team going after Valora needs to just be the others and me."

"I'm coming with you."

"You can't!" she protested. "She'll kill you. The others have some immunity; she can't touch them without serious repercussions. We all know she'll be after me, but with you there she might switch her focus. I can't keep my attention on her when I'm worried about you."

"You have a plan then, on how to kill her?" Squall asked.

She shook her head. "No, not really. You know me, I don't make plans, and even when I do I change my mind so many times you all lose count."

"Then I'm going," he declared. "I'm sure Tobias is thinking of something, and you may need the extra help. From what he told me the stipulations are just that they can't kill her, which doesn't exclude other outside help."

She sighed, knowing that she was losing this battle but not willing to give up. "Please, just wait until you hear what the others have to say before you decide."

"I guess I can agree to that. I don't promise to change my mind though."

It was better than nothing. Now she just had to get the others to agree that he should stay behind. With all of their objections, he should be convinced. "Thanks."

"I've got paperwork to catch up on," Squall said, "but I want to meet with you all tonight to go over plans. Have everyone meet at my dorm at 18:00 hours."

"Sure. I'll leave you to it then."

Once she was in the hall, she wasn't sure where she wanted to go. She knew that she needed to talk to the others, but with the morning still fresh in her mind she wasn't thrilled about going back so soon. Anne would be bound to ask uncomfortable questions. She ended up hesitating outside the door before turning and walking towards Adrian's dorm.

She didn't rethink her decision until she was standing at his door, but before she could walk away, it opened.

"Are you just going to stand there?" Adrian asked. Her mouth fell open in surprise, but she couldn't find any words, so she shook her head and followed him inside.

"I've been waiting for you since I heard you were back from Esthar. How did the meeting go?" The topic he chose threw her off enough that she relaxed.

"Actually, it went pretty well. Caraway was congenial. It's been decided that he will be the next Galbadian president."

"I can see that. No one else is better suited to the job, at least not in that country."

She nodded. "We're staging a coup, using him and the returning soldiers to cause enough of a distraction that we can take out Valora."

"So when is this supposed to take place?" Adrian asked, leaning against his desk.

She plopped down on his bed. "They expect it to take a week. We're to arrive at an undisclosed time to take care of Valora. Squall plans on having a meeting at 18:00 hours to debrief the rest of the team about the mission."

"That's fine. I expected something like this when I heard of the peace talks with Caraway. I was surprised it took so long."

"Part of that was that Squall wanted to talk to me after, about his lost memories."

He sighed, crossing the room, kneeling before her. "I'm so sorry for leaving you."

She nodded, reaching out to him. "I know," she said as he grabbed her hand, moving to sit next to her on the bed. "There was nothing you could do. It was actually harder having Squall here, being able to see him and know that he wasn't really there. I don't think I would have made it through if it was you like that instead of him."

Adrian shifted, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"That's why I don't like this plan," she explained. "I couldn't bear to lose you, to lose any of you, and Squall's got it in his mind that he needs to be there when we face Valora. That he can help us in some way. I just don't see it. What if he gets hurt?"

"Squall is a big boy, he can handle himself. You should worry about you. Do you have a plan for how you're going to fight her?" Seeing her blank look, he continued. "I'd worry more about what you're going to do, and less about what might happen to Squall."

Sighing, she pulled away and crossed to the window. He had a point, but it wasn't very comforting. She still had no idea how she could to kill Valora. The only thing she'd found out about killing an angel was that with enough power it might be possible to sever their ties to immortality. As a mortal creature they could die just as easily as any other.

The others might be able to help her on that front, but it would be a risky move. Too little power and it wouldn't work, too much and it could kill Valora outright. For Nichole, too much wouldn't be an issue, but for the others… well, perhaps it was best if they weren't involved at all.

Which brought her back to the main question: would the tower give her the power to defeat Valora? It was so fickle she just couldn't be sure.

"Gil for your thoughts," said Adrian quietly, coming up behind her.

She startled, blushing. She'd forgotten he was there. She must have looked like an idiot, standing there staring into space. "I wasn't thinking of much really."

He sighed. "Okay… So what did you come here for then?"

She frowned, wondering what he meant. Did he not want her there? "I guess I just wanted to see you, and I'm supposed to inform everyone about the meeting tonight. Did you want me to leave?"

He shook his head, turning her so that she was looking at him. "Oh, Hyne no. I just wondered if you had anything in mind…" The innuendo was barely masked but rather than the discomfort she'd expected to feel, warmth and excitement sparked through her. He hadn't changed his mind after all.

"Nothing in particular," she admitted, trying her hand at flirting, "but I'm open to suggestions..."

The words didn't come naturally to her but she felt she'd made an adequate attempt. She was rewarded when he grinned, bending to meet his lips with hers.

-oooOooo-

Hours later they awoke to someone pounding on the door.

"Shit, what time is it?" Nichole mumbled against his chest as he worked to untangle their limbs and climb out of bed.

"I don't know. After dark…" Adrian picked up his jeans from where they'd been tossed and slid them on. He rushed to the door, zipping his fly as he went. He heard Nichole shift in the bed, moving out of view.

"Adrian… finally," Anne said as the door slid open. "I've been trying to get a hold of you for over an hour now. Why is your phone off?"

He blocked her as she tried to step in, doing his best to be subtle about it. As far as they'd come, he doubted Nichole would be comfortable being discovered in his bed.

"What's the matter?" Anne asked, looking him over, "For that matter, why are you undressed?"

He wasn't sure how to answer that question but she didn't wait for one, plowing on, "Never mind… Is Nichole here?"

Once again he found himself debating how to answer. Unfortunately she took his reticence as a negative, glaring at him. "Nichole better be the one in there, or I won't save you from the castration that's sure to follow. I might even hold you down."

He turned a little green at the thought as Nichole laughed behind him. "I'm here, Anne," she said, coming into view, his sheet wrapped around her like a toga, "what did you need?"

Anne used his distraction to shove past him, her bowling ball belly easily knocking him aside.

"I came to tell you that you missed the meeting. We were lucky Squall ran into Tobias and informed him of it or we all would have. Someone was obviously distracted."

Nichole blushed. "I uh… well, lost track of time. How did it go anyway? Please tell me Tobias talked Squall out of going."

Anne shook her head. "Nope, he's more determined than ever. Tobias thought it was a good idea. I'm not so sure, but I'm not willing to say it's not either."

Nichole groaned. "I was counting on Tobias to be the reasonable one. Dammit, why can't he ever do what I want him to?"

"If that's all you came for, could you at least let us get dressed?" Adrian said.

Anne glared at him. "I wouldn't have disturbed you if I thought you were _busy_. You'd think you'd have other things on your mind, considering the crazy angel on the loose."

He snorted. She was one to talk. There was no way he was going to waste what time he had worrying about what was going to happen in a week. Who knew if they'd even be around after that?

"Anne, thanks for telling us about the meeting," Nichole butted in, preempting the not-so-nice comment that was already forming on his tongue. "I'll apologize to Squall for missing it in the morning, but for now I'd really just like to go back to sleep."

Anne smiled as something unspoken passed between the two, and before he could really wonder at it, she nodded. "Sure. I'll see you guys at breakfast then. Have a good night." And like that she was gone, the door sliding shut behind her, leaving him with the distinct feeling he'd missed something.

"Ugh… how embarrassing," Nichole groaned.

"Maybe…" he agreed, although he'd been more annoyed at the interruption than embarrassed. "I have to say that the sheet toga is a good look for you."

She blushed, but before she could respond he crossed to her, and tugged it down. "I do, however, like this one much better. Now then, where were we?"


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-two**  
**  
**It's half the distance through the open door, before you shut me down… Again

_Balamb Garden, Gotland Peninsula, Galbadia, March 13, 083 ALC, 18:14 Hours_

The lights of Deling City flashed in the distant twilight, a scattering of flames in the dark sea. Their week was up. The battle for Garden's freedom, for their home, would be over one way or another within the next few hours.

He wished that things could be different, but wishes weren't going to change anything; not now.

"That's the signal," Zell said from his left. "I wish you'd change your mind, Squall."

Squall sighed. He couldn't. As much as he'd feel safer with Zell at his back, he'd be better off back at Garden. "I want you here. Quistis is going so someone needs to be here to act as Commander in my stead. I leave the task to you. I know you won't let me down."

"Course not," Zell agreed, "but I'd rather have your back out there."

"Is everything prepared?" Headmaster Xu asked.

"Yes," Squall assured her, "you have the mission specs. If all goes to plan we'll be back in the morning." If it didn't go to plan… there probably wouldn't be anything left.

This was the second battle where the outcome could mean the destruction of his world. In the first he'd had Rinoa to fight for, to come back to. Now he wasn't quite sure why he was doing it. For his home maybe, as it was one of the only things he had left. For Nichole partly, because she needed him, even if she didn't think so. For the world, because Rinoa had asked it of him once in a dream.

Was it enough? Only time would tell.

"Are you ready?" Nichole asked from behind him.

He nodded at the others, Xu with her eyes full of hope and worry, Zell with frustration wrought upon his face and arms crossed over his chest, before turning to her. "I'm ready."

She smiled hesitantly.

When they entered the elevator, she grabbed his hand. "Please," she whispered, "you don't have to do this. Stay here where you'll be safe."

He shook his head. "I can't run away." Even if he wanted to, he couldn't back out now.

She cursed under her breath. "How did I know that would be your answer?"

He just smirked at her.

She shook her head, but couldn't hide the smile that curled at the corners of her mouth. "You never used to be this stubborn."

"I learned from the best."

She sighed. "Fine… be that way. Promise me something though, please?"

"What?" he asked warily.

"Be careful. I know that you're good, I know that you can handle yourself, but please just… be careful."

He nodded. He could agree to that, he was always careful. It was she who pulled the stupidly reckless stunts. "Alright."

The Ragnarok was ready to go when they arrived inside the hangar. Selphie would take them into the city and drop them behind the Presidential Palace.

"Squall!" Selphie called from the driver's seat.

He acknowledged her with a nod before sitting down.

The others left him alone on the short trip to the palace. Quistis huddled with Tobias; Nichole was pulled onto Adrian's lap and was talking quietly to Gavin. Anne was absent, and would stay that way for the entirety of the mission. It was risky enough already without adding her and her unborn child to the mix.

-oooOooo-

Gleaming white lights lit up the night. Soldiers ran back and forth, busy with the distractions General Caraway was providing around the Palace gates. Squall unsheathed his gunblade, ready for battle as the Ragnarok's ramp lowered into the frenzy. He jumped off, followed by the others, already engaging a Galbadian soldier as the Ragnarok retreated with a roar.

Slash, parry, thrust, trigger, he lost himself in the dance of blades, cutting down soldier after soldier, working his way steadily towards the palace doors. Tobias' golden blades flashed beside him, Quistis' whip tripped up those in her path. Gavin and Nichole worked in tandem, casting spell after spell, aiming to disable rather than kill. Adrian trailed behind them, healing the Galbadian wounded just enough so that they wouldn't bleed out before Caraway's men could get to them.

They reached the side doors in a matter of minutes, Gavin knocking out the remaining guards with Sleep before they entered. Compared to the courtyard, the palace was silent as the grave. It seemed unnatural and set alarm bells ringing in Squall's head.

They proceeded into the eerie silence, warily watching for any signs of movement.

Even with their caution they were still taken by surprise as the hall flooded with GIM47N units. Before he could blink a Thunder rumbled above him, sending its magical electricity into him. He jerked, cursing heavily as his nerves spasmed.

He'd always hated Thunder magic. Fire was painful and sometimes left burns, but was generally fleeting. Blizzard felt like getting hit by a refrigerator truck, but beyond cold extremities, the effects weren't lasting. Thunder, however, lingered within the system, leaving an energy residue that continued to fray the nerves well after the spell was through. It didn't cause any permanent damage but nothing else was quite so unpleasant.

Quistis retaliated, casting her own Thundaga on the creature, shorting out its biomechanics.

"Get back," Nichole warned, stepping in front of him.

He did as she said, moving back with the rest of the group as her energy crackled in the air and she cast Ultima, felling a good chunk of the resistance.

Squall wondered where she picked up that particular spell for her arsenal, but didn't have time to question it as the monsters left untouched by the blast charged. Bullets flew, Thunder rained from above as he dodged, slicing and hacking at their joints.

The others joined him in the fray as Nichole sheltered them all within her shield. There were a few tense moments before the hall was clear and they were able to move on. Anne's detailed report on the inner structure of the palace proved invaluable as they searched for the President's office. They traversed the halls quickly, taking out the mechanical monsters as they went and soon they were standing before the imposing red double doors.

"This is it," Quistis stated, her voice filled with trepidation.

Squall nodded, saying nothing as he twisted the handle and entered.

"My, my, my…" The voice chilled his spine as the woman of his nightmares stood poised in front of her massive obsidian desk. She was dressed in the spirit of the powerful business woman, a black tailored dress suit, silk stockings, and killer heels. Her hair was pulled back in the severe chignon she'd donned for her world address and diamonds glinted from her earlobes. "What have we here?"

The others surrounded him while Valora looked him over like he was a piece of meat—or perhaps her favorite toy. "The little lion has come back to play." She smiled, her face a picture of beauty made hollow by the malice emanating from her vivid green eyes.

Squall shuddered, uncomfortable having those eyes so intent on him. Nichole stepped in front of him, and while he cursed her stupidity, he found himself thankful for the reprieve.

"And the girl," Valora snapped, her eyes shooting daggers at Nichole, "always back to the Hyne-damned girl."

"I have a name." Nichole crossed her arms. "_Auntie Val_," she practically sung, smiling ferociously.

Valora screeched, "Don't you dare call me that!"

Nichole laughed. "Why shouldn't I? Can't handle the truth, Auntie?"

She stamped her foot. "I am not your Auntie!" she screamed, the magic of Flare already gathering around her. Tobias had just enough time to cast Reflect on Nichole before it hit, sending it rebounding back to its caster.

Valora cried out as the orange rays exploded. "Curse you!" she spat, drawing herself up. "I'll show you what happens to those who interfere!"

"No," Nichole said, casting Ultima at her, "this is between you and me."

The spell hit, the ensuing explosion knocking Valora back a few steps. "I'll play with you once I remove your little helpers from the game!" spat Valora.

"Valora, it doesn't have to be this way," Tobias beseeched, moving to his sister's side. "Give up your claim on the tower and we could end this here. You could be free."

Valora cackled. The sound was like nails on a chalkboard, and Squall winced.

"Fools and dimwits… those who bend to Cosmos' will. Trying to rule the unruly. You sound exactly like my idiot brother. Why don't you go back to your little tower and let the big girls play, hmm?"

Her grin was feral as she sent an orb of red-black light hurtling for him. Nichole cried out, shoving Tobias out of the way, but was too slow to remove herself from the danger as well. The magic imploded as it struck, flashing once before disappearing altogether, taking Nichole with it.

"No!" Valora screeched, "you will not escape me!" She vanished in a show of red-black sparks, leaving the rest staring at each other in confusion.

_What just happened?_

"I think she somehow sent Nichole to the High Plane. I'm not sure how or why she thinks she can follow. She was supposed to be banished."

"Yeah, well, Valora seems to do a lot of things we don't think she can do," Adrian pointed out.

Gavin nodded. "I think they've always underestimated her. We should follow before Nichole finds herself in deeper water than she can bail herself out of."

"Hold on," Tobias told Squall, grabbing his arm. "This is going to feel rather… odd."

-oooOooo-

Her world shifted, spinning around her; her insides felt like they were being forcefully rearranged. Her mind expanded, feeling heavy, before being shoved through a passage the size of a pinprick. She shut her eyes, trying to block out the dizzying array of lights flashing before them, but nothing assuaged the feeling that she was out of place.

When the ground solidified beneath her feet, she collapsed to her knees, giving thanks for its unmoving presence. The vertigo gradually passed and she opened her eyes, taking in the world she found herself in.

The sky above her was a weird, shifting, whitish-blue, but the trees looked normal enough, with green leaves fluttering in the gentle wind. Dark brown stone rose up all around her, stacked to form walls surrounding an open garden. She was in a courtyard, she realized, one with breathtaking flower beds and a bubbling green brook. A little piece of paradise.

Trees of all shapes and sizes were scattered amongst the grass while gray paved paths wove through them in all directions. She knelt at the center of a small cobblestone patio, surrounded by white stone benches, and more flowerbeds, these ones raised.

In the distance, she could see a colossal mansion built entirely from the dark brown stone and rising above it, the parapet of a tower, green as the grass surrounding her, glinting in the light. Her eyes traveled to her left on a hunch, and she was unsurprised to see another tower, this one as white as virgin snow. Blue and green lines wove up the smooth exterior, mimicking the look of trailing vines.

Beyond it, further to her left was another tower, this one composed of golden bricks that shone under the peculiar sky. She didn't take the time to examine it fully. She knew where she was now; she just wasn't quite sure how she'd ended up there, of all places.

She stood on shaky legs, turning around to where the 'darker' towers must lie. A tower formed from the darkest onyx glittered with a black light in front of her. The land surrounding it was barren, devoid of anything alive and Nichole knew that she had found the tower of Death. For all that it was dark, it beckoned, promising comfort and peace. Ignoring it for a moment she turned to the tower opposite the golden one. The tower that would be hers. It was silver, which was somewhat of a surprise—she'd been expecting a darker color—with red designs trailing haphazardly up its height. It gleamed like a polished blade. Windows of all shapes and sizes littered the walls and plants of all types grew wild along its base.

This was hers, or it would be if she could defeat Valora. She knew it like she knew her own name. It called to her, entreating her to come closer, to look inside, but she didn't dare.

"Nichole?" Alexis called, hurrying toward her, "Darling, what are you doing here?"

She bit back the retort that she wasn't his 'darling'. "I don't know. I think Valora meant to send Tobias here and I got in the way."

Alexis looked puzzled. "She was banished… how did she acquire access enough to perform a sending?"

She shrugged, figuring the question must be rhetorical.

"If she truly was the one to send you then the ban must be lifting. I need to consult the Council. They need to know of this development," he said, turning to go back the way he came.

"The Council already knows," a grave voice informed him. She turned to face the speaker, an angel she had never seen before. He had the appearance of being in his early sixties; his hair was almost entirely silver, and his face was worn and craggy like he'd seen long days under the sun. The wings folded serenely along his back were white, matching the robes he wore, but his aura glittered with the colors of the rainbow. The power swirling around him was tangible, visible to her even without the aid of her second-sight.

Five more angels materialized behind him, three male and two female, all appearing to be around the same age and all with the white wings and rainbow auras. Only he reeked of power, however, and Nichole knew that he must be the leader of the group.

"We have foreseen this contingency and will lead the girl to the place where she will make her stand. You will attend, Alexis, as will the others. Go collect them."

Alexis nodded once and turning on his heel, rushed off.

"Nichole?"

Nichole whipped around and found Anne standing on the path, her hands resting on her belly. "What's going on?" she asked, coming to Nichole's side. "Where are the others?"

"I'm not actually sure," Nichole admitted. "Somehow I got sent here, and now the Council guy says he's going to send me to the battle." She indicated the stony-looking elder.

"Death will be present as this meeting," he announced, startling both of them, "it is ordained. You will all face the threat, you will succeed or fail, and the universe will follow. Be ready."

It was all the warning she received before the world disappeared and a shining vortex of light claimed her. As quickly as it began, it was over. The ground was solid once more and she found herself standing in a field of flowers much like the one outside the orphanage in Centra.

"The fields of Elysia," Anne breathed out.

The edge of the field was dotted with small trees, a waterfall spilled over gray rocks to her left, ending in a shallow pool, and all around her wildflowers blossomed amongst the green grass. It was a peaceful, happy place, not what she would have imagined as the site for an epic battle.

"Elysia?" she asked.

Xavier was the one to answer, appearing beside her, his piercing eyes fixed on hers. "A place between Life and Death, a place outside the realm of either. A bridge, I think, might be the most apt description, although some call it the plane between planes. When Death claims a soul it is sent here until Life calls it back to fulfill its purpose. It is an appropriate place for a battle such as this; the towers hold little sway here. You will have equal advantage."

"Where are the souls then?" she asked, looking around her. The place was abandoned.

"They have been temporarily re-homed until the completion of the battle," he explained. "Depending on the outcome, the move may become permanent."

"Oh, hush," Anne chided. "You're always so negative. Relax… Nichole's got this one in the bag."

Nichole smiled slightly. She appreciated the support but she wasn't so sure.

"I've come to escort you to the council's circle," Xavier addressed Anne. "Valora will be arriving shortly and we'll just get in the way."

Anne crushed Nichole to her briefly, her belly pressing into Nichole's abdomen. "Good luck, girl," Anne whispered. "We're rooting for you." Then they were off, Xavier holding her shoulders as she shook with tears.

Nichole shook her head, feeling rather melancholy herself. She couldn't afford to lose; she couldn't let her friends down. She couldn't allow Valora to destroy everything that was precious in the world.

She felt the energy in the air shift as a magical tear opened up right next to her. She readied her power, waiting for the right moment to release it as five figures appeared. She cut the spell she'd been ready to cast, cursing under her breath as Adrian rushed toward her.

"You're okay," he whispered, pulling her into his arms. She nodded against his chest, drawing comfort from his warmth.

"Ah, young love," Valora sneered. "How sickening."

She and Adrian whipped around as one. Valora was in her true form here, her dark red wings folded along her back, her aura glowing with a sinister light. Her midnight hair flowed freely over her shoulders, trailing down her back. Her dress had changed too; she now wore a swath of black that seemed like it had been painted on. It looped around her neck, crossing in the front to cover her breasts before wrapping tightly around her waist and legs to form a skirt.

Her gaze slid from them to a space off to their left. "I feel your hand in this, Council. You overstep your bounds," she accused.

"There has been no direct interference,"—the leader's disembodied voice carried over the plain—"you were banished from the High Plane, and banished you will remain. Trying to breach it has brought you here, not us."

Valora screeched, throwing a spell at where the voice originated. It was absorbed in a brief show of blue power. "No matter," she growled, turning back to face Nichole, "the outcome will be the same."

Nichole let Adrian go and stepped away, watching Valora warily with both of her sights. The red energy of the tower swirled with the tainted black of Valora's aura and the underlying darker crimson of her own innate energy. "Let's just get this over with," Nichole said, with more bravado than she felt.

Valora smiled a cruel, twisted grin. "Oh, let's."

Thundaga crackled in the air, catching Nichole by surprise. It hit her full force. Her body convulsed, once, twice, her vision blacking out under the overload to her nerves. She took a deep breath, fighting the pain, until the magic had run its course. She retaliated with Holy and was slightly disappointed that it didn't seem to cause any extra pain for the unholy bitch.

Squall charged, taking the opportunity to bring his gunblade down in a swinging arc. Quistis followed him, her whip already lashing out. Tobias and Gavin drew their weapons, trailing behind. Adrian cast a Cure at Nichole, mitigating the damage done by the Thundaga. Nichole cast another spell, Firaga this time.

Valora smiled, a feral grin, flicking Squall away like a proverbial fly, before turning Quistis' own weapon against her. The Firaga hit her, exploding, but it barely fazed her.

Two black curved blades appeared in the air before her, and she grabbed them, crossing them in the nick of time to absorb the blow from Gavin's halberd. She wasn't quick enough, however, to dodge Tobias' swords as they came down, splitting open her forearm with a gush of blood.

Valora hissed, throwing Gavin back and turning on Tobias. "You've become rather bothersome, little boy. That almost hurt."

Nichole watched in horror as the blood slowed, then stopped altogether, the wound re-knitting as if it had never been there.

"Didn't anyone ever teach you that angels are immortal?" Valora taunted. "Now, half-breeds? Not so much…"

She twisted, meeting Tobias' swords midair before throwing them off with a shriek of metal on metal. Tobias turned, going to strike again, but Valora was quicker, the edge of her blade slicing across his abdomen. He fell back and blood seeped from the wound, spreading across his white shirt.

Nichole screamed with his shock and pain and cast Ultima at Valora, hoping to distract her, even as she ran for him. Valora jumped back, out of range of the spell, the magic missing her entirely. Adrian overtook Nichole, dropping to his knees before Tobias, already casting a Cura. Shaking off her stupor, Nichole gathered Hyne's power to her, the icy tendrils of magic curled above her hands, forming into lances. She volleyed them at Valora.

The first two missed entirely but the third struck true, severing sinew and bone in one clean slice. Valora shrieked, clutching her injured shoulder. Quistis and Gavin took the opportunity presented to cast Quake and Meteor. Earth pounded Valora from above and below, and she fell to her knees.

Squall charged her, his blade glinting as he brought it down for the kill. Valora's eyes flashed in hatred, her mouth twisting in a cruel smile as she laughed; the sound was breaking glass on the wind. "Fools," she spat, "you cannot kill me!"

She brought up her good arm, her black blade parrying Squall's blow as her magic lashed out, knocking him to his back, and sending him twenty or so feet across the space like a human skipping stone.

Nichole's heart stopped as he landed in a heap. Quistis rushed to his still form. "He's alive!" she called and Nichole's muscles unclenched enough for her to draw in a breath, to turn shakily back to the battle.

Valora's blood had stopped flowing and Nichole could see where the tissue of the shoulder was already knitting back together. She cursed. All of this was getting them nowhere, would continue to get them nowhere, as long as Valora maintained her immortality.

Tobias was up again, he and Adrian had their weapons drawn, heading unerringly for the woman a few dozen feet ahead of them. Valora cackled and Nichole sent out a triple barrage of Holy spells, hoping that the idiots would retreat. The spells hit, one after another.

Valora screeched in rage, retaliating with red-black bolt of lightning that flew straight for Nichole. She tried to dodge, but wasn't quite fast enough. The beam struck her arm, sending pure torture coursing through her veins. Her world dimmed, and she choked on the coppery blood filling her mouth. The power fed into hers, twisting it upon itself, feeding its destructive agenda.

Her screams echoed while her body was consumed by the raging energy. She was losing consciousness, her vision flickering in and out when a turquoise light enveloped her, soothing her burnt out mind, chasing the red-black energy from her system. She sighed in relief as the cool magic traveled along her aching limbs, leaving her feeling refreshed, energized even. Her eyes opened—she hadn't even realized she'd shut them—and she could see Adrian's face.

"NO!" Valora screamed. "She was gone! The tower was mine! How dare you interfere! You shall pay for this!"

Nichole whipped her head around to Valora, while Adrian pulled her to her feet. Valora's attention had been diverted to Tobias, however. He fought valiantly, his golden blades against Valora's black but Valora had the upper hand; her rage feeding her power. She parried a crushing blow and tossed Tobias away with flash of dark light. His aura enveloped him, protecting him from the brunt of the blast, but the impact with the dirt was enough to wind him.

Gavin cast Thundaga at Valora, but she flicked the spell back at him. Nichole gathered the power to send more shards. Just as they were forming, Valora struck.

It wasn't directed at her as expected, instead the dark lightning arched out, striking Adrian. He grunted at the impact, his eyes rolling back as the energy sparked around him, cocooning him in a net of colored electricity.

Nichole gasped in horror, trying vainly to reach him; the spell snapping at her, burning her hands. Turquoise power radiated from his skin, fighting off the invading energy, still Nichole feared it wouldn't be enough.

The energy shifted as Valora charged another bolt, and Nichole knew then that it had to end, and it had to end right that second. Valora was going to kill Adrian, but more than him, she was going to kill a tower. What little sanity Valora had clung to was gone. Smoke in the wind.

There was no choice, there was only one chance. _Griever…_ Nichole called, _I need you now_.

_As you wish, my chosen,_ he answered in her mind. _As you command_.

Her heart aching, she locked onto Valora and _jumped_, landing just behind her. She caught the angel by surprise, wrapping her arms around her in a parody of a hug. Valora sneered trying to twist away from her, but Nichole held tight, resolute in her mission.

Griever appeared beside her, towering over them as they struggled. _Give me your power_, Nichole commanded, _lend me your strength, help me do what must be done_.

Griever roared his defiance when what she intended became clear, but he had no choice, he could not disobey.

"No!" Tobias yelled, running for her, Gavin on his tail, Squall at their heels.

Nichole shook her head, her eyes apologetic as she forced the link binding them to close—it was enough that he knew what she was going to do, he didn't need to feel it as well. She twisted again, teleporting Valora as far as she could, and gathered all of her power to her, opening her link to Hyne's gift and her aspect. Griever's energy fed her efforts, providing the conduit into Chaos.

"You only delay the inevitable," Valora sneered, clawing wildly at Nichole's vice-like arms, streams of blood flowing under her sharp nails. "You cannot win, girl, I am immortal."

"Wanna bet?" Nichole grinned as the power, strong and infinite, shattered through her barrier and she _pushed_, sending it all flowing into the woman she held. It was her last hope, an attack every Sorceress knew of. Edea had warned her of what she could do, what trying to hold in the power could do… It was desperate, crazy… It was suicide, but a Sorceress was only as good as her Final Strike.

She was burning, boiling from the inside out while the power flowed like lava, running through her and into the angel. They were screaming, shrieking in tandem, their cries swallowed by the roar of magic. The lines between them shifted, blurred until they were one mass of twisting, agonizing energy. Silver, hot, raw, it consumed everything in its path, radiating out from their center.

It was madness but Nichole held on, held out even when she couldn't think, couldn't see, she kept the conduit open, the power flowing, praying that it would be enough, that it could make the immortal mortal, finish it, once and for all.

They lost the strength to stand, sinking down, locked in their embrace, screaming, always screaming, until they couldn't anymore. Nichole could feel the life draining from her, washed away bit by bit in the sea of energy, the never ending flow, but still she held on. Held until her senses fizzled, until her mind went blank, until she could no longer feel her heartbeat; then as the power exploded burning her to ash, she welcomed her death.

* * *

**AN**: Well I'd say sorry about the delay in posting, but the truth is I've kind of lost interest in this. The story has been finished and fully edited, and that's taken the weight of it off of my shoulders and since there hasn't been any response or real interest, posting the rest of it just hasn't been a priority. But leaving things unfinished will bug me after a while, so I'm going to post the rest and mark it as complete, and then I can say I'm really done with it.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty-three**

Let me introduce you to the end

_Fields of Elysia, The Plane between Planes, March 14, __083 ALC,__ 03:00 Hours_

Wind trickled across the plain, stirring the tall grasses, sending goose bumps trailing up his spine, before fading once more, leaving only the oppressive calm. Silence choked them all, smothering them in the wake of the explosion of silver light.

He felt like he'd gone deaf, like the color had seeped from the world as the weight of what just happened sunk in.

She was gone…

She was…

He shook his head, consumed by the memories of the last time he'd watched someone he loved die.

_Why? Why did it _always_ have to be this way?_

_Rinoa… why?_

Sound and color rushed back to him all at once. He could hear a woman crying off to his left (_Quistis?),_ could see Gavin and Tobias on their knees before him, their shoulders hunched in utter defeat. Griever keened in the distance, his mournful yowls echoing.

Squall stumbled forward, drawn by invisible strings to see the wreckage for himself. He stopped just at the edge of the crater, his eyes taking in everything but seeing nothing. The dent in the land was the size of Balamb Garden. Tufts of smoke curled up from deep grooves in the heated rock.

In the center of the ruin lay Valora, her pale skin a stark contrast to the blackened earth. She was naked, the fabric of her dress burned away in the heat. But she was unblemished except for two wounds, one on each of her shoulder blades where her wings used to be. They bled sluggishly, but his attention wasn't on them for long… Nichole was nowhere to be found.

He searched the area frantically, moving around the crater on the off chance that her body had been thrown by the blast. Still he couldn't find anything; nothing to note her passing, nothing to mark her existence.

A groan floated on a gust of wind and he looked down to see Valora stirring in the earth.

He scrambled away, putting as much distance between himself and the crater as possible. All of that, and the bitch still wouldn't die. Maybe she truly was immortal. The others had said that she could be killed, but…

"Griever…" Valora called, her voice a weak rasp.

The Guardian shuddered, looking like he was trying to ignore her call.

"Griever, don't defy me," she whispered, "answer your Pinnacle, answer your chosen."

"Yes, mistress," Griever growled.

Valora laughed, cackling insanely as she pushed herself to her feet. "After all that time spent trying to kill her, she does it for me! Stupid girl!" She closed her eyes and dark tendrils of magic wrapped around her, forming a dress exactly like her original.

Squall couldn't think. He knew that Valora being alive, and apparently unharmed, was a _really bad thing_ but he couldn't see how he could stop her. All of a sudden, he was painfully aware of Nichole's reasoning when she'd protested his presence. What could one mortal do against an immortal with Valora's power? He felt stupid, powerless… like he'd brought a knife to a gun fight.

Tobias jerked his arm, motioning for him to be silent as he tugged him further away. "We've got to get you out of here," he whispered, "Valora is the sole Pinnacle of Chaos now, the tower will do her bidding. Nichole would kill me if anything happened to you."

Squall felt the tingling presence of magic as they stepped through a barrier. On the other side Anne's quiet sobbing and Gavin's hushed soothing words rose to his ears. Five elder-looking angels with white wings stood off to the side while another group of angels—these with wings of varying colors—hovered around a rather shocked looking angel with golden wings.

Adrian sat numbly beside Anne and Gavin, staring off into space. Quistis hovered over them, all of their eyes were red-rimmed.

"Send him back to Gaea," Tobias demanded of one of the angels with white wings.

The angel shook his head. "The battle is not yet won. Chaos has given you the means to defeat her; it will be up to humanity to see it through."

Tobias growled. "What are you talking about?"

The angel with the golden wings was the one to answer, "She gave her life to take away Valora's immortality. Her wings—" his voice cracked, and he cleared his throat, "her wings are gone. Our wings are our tie to the Creator, our physical representation of his gift. With Eternity missing, Valora will have lost her immortality altogether. She can be killed, but he—" he pointed to Squall "—will have to be the one to do it. Your limitations remain; she is still tied to the tower."

Tobias shook his head. "He'll be killed."

Quistis sighed. "Maybe not. We can't kill her, but that doesn't mean we can't help. We'll have to distract her, use just enough power to keep her attention so Squall can strike the killing blow."

"That could work," Gavin agreed. "We'll have to be really careful though. Are you up for it, Squall?"

Squall nodded. Anything to keep Valora from winning, to keep the world safe.

Anne looked at him with tear-filled eyes. "Keep safe," she whispered as she pulled out of Gavin's arms, and leaned down to wrap her arms around Adrian.

"I can feel your magic, Council," Valora said. "Are you sticking around to see my victory, to watch as I destroy everything your precious Creator has built?"

Tobias nodded at Squall. "Go ahead, we'll be right behind you. We won't let any harm come to you if we can help it."

Squall nodded, stepping outside.

Valora's vivid green eyes lit up, her mouth twisting into a cruel grin. "Oh, this is precious. The little lion sent to the slaughter. Council, _really_, you can't do better than this?"

Squall lifted his gunblade, swinging it over his shoulder. "They don't have to," he said with more courage than he felt, "a baby could kill you now. You're nothing but a mortal on a power trip."

"Enough of this!" Valora spat, "Griever, kill this simpleton."

"As you command," Griever replied.

"Fight her," a deep, growling voice ordered, "use the tower's call to return to it."

"Dammit!" Valora screeched, "why does everyone feel the need to interfere!?"

The deep voice chuckled as a burning light appeared before Squall. Ifrit rose from the flames towering before him. Tinkling laughter—like icicles clinking against each other—surrounded him as a bright blue light coalesced and Shiva joined the barricade. A flash of yellow lightning struck the earth on Ifrit's other side and Quezacotl spun up, unfurling his yellow wings, screeching out his defiance.

Ifrit turned to Squall. "We will fight Father. Focus on the woman, cut her down."

_Father_? Squall wondered, but didn't have time to ask as Ifrit called up his burning meteor, Shiva her ice and Quezacotl charged his lightning beam.

"Fine." Valora sighed. "I'll just have to kill you myself!"

A beam of red-black energy shot toward him. He was frozen, helpless. Before it could hit, before he could blink, he was pulled off his feet and yanked safely out of range. Vines as thick as his wrist had saved him, cradling him amongst their leaves.

Valora turned to their source—Quistis, looking rather deadly with the other end of the vines held as if they were her whip. "Really, you think that will stop me?"

"No, but he will," Quistis indicated Tobias who had sneaked around behind Valora, his blades drawn and ready to strike.

Valora barely parried his first slash and it sent her reeling, allowing Tobias to land a glancing blow. The vines let Squall down, guiding him to his feet. Quistis winked at him, and he nodded, before joining Tobias in the melee. Thundaga struck Valora twice, making her jolt and twitch.

"Griever!" Valora said, "take out those wretched creatures! Your mistress needs you!"

"As you wish," the Guardian bit out, parrying Shiva who was fighting ferociously with a blade of ice.

"Not so fast." Quistis called, sending her vines burrowing under the earth to erupt at Valora's feet.

Tobias struck, slicing Valora across the chest, where a thin line of blood oozed over her breasts.

"Squall, now!" Quistis yelled, struggling to hold the vines as Valora worked to counter them.

Squall charged, his blade over his shoulder, ready to strike the killing blow. Blue met red as Griever blocked his swing.

Squall leapt away, barely dodging the second red blade. Quistis' vines retreated, forced back by Valora's magic. Tobias charged only to be thrown by a blast of Valora's energy.

Valora smiled, cruel and cunning. "Griever, make him bleed!"

Squall's eyes widened in horror as they met Griever's gray ones and the great Guardian roared, "Shockwave Pulsar!"

Ifrit leapt in front of him, taking the brunt of the magic's pull as the white light surrounded them, carrying them into the air. A pinprick of black energy started pulling at him, growing with every turn. He felt like his skin was being sucked off and he could see where Ifrit's fine red fur was being sheared. Ifrit yowled, while tendrils of the black magic lashed out, seeking blood. Squall cowered behind the Guardian, dodging the magic but he wasn't quick enough. A tendril caught him across the chest, ripping him from shoulder to hip.

He screamed, falling to one knee as the magic released him. Ifrit lay bleeding and broken before him, but Squall could barely see past his own burning pain. The wound was bad—he could tell from the way his head spun that he was losing blood much too quickly.

Shiva and Quezacotl fell on Griever in a flash of ice and lightning. As the titans clashed Squall cast a Cure on himself, praying it would be enough for him to finish the job once and for all. The liquid rush of magic gave him just enough energy that he was able to find his feet. He charged Valora, steeling himself as he sliced.

She smiled, parrying his attack with ease, but was hit seconds later by an Ultima sent from Gavin. Quistis' vines wrapped around Valora again, tangling her in their web.

Squall took the cue, bringing his blade down in an arc, his finger hovering over the trigger. Valora caught his blade with hers, pushing him back, throwing off Quistis' vines and turning Gavin's Thundaga back on him. Squall grunted as he hit the ground, blood seeping from his wound. He felt faint and dizzy. He needed to end this, end it while he still had the time.

He turned, grasping at straws, pulling on his last reserves. The power came, surging within him. He held his blade, absorbing all of the magic that he could hold before dashing toward Valora.

His first strike exploded against her blades, throwing her off-balance enough that his second sliced across her arm. She countered but he was too fast, slicing at her in a flurry that she just barely managed to avoid. He swung his blade up, jumping away as he called on his greatest attack. She would find out how his weapon had come by its name, the last thing she would see was his Lion Heart.

Blue energy crackled around him, filling him until he could no longer feel anything but the pulsing need to release it, to slice his enemy into ribbons and laugh as she bled at his feet. Wind and energy alike twisted under him, cocooning him in a sphere of golden power before popping like a bubble under pressure.

He rushed forward, the magic quickening his steps, the momentum of his first upward strike already pulling him in. Valora crossed her blades, just barely avoiding that killing blow, but the force of his attack tossed her up into the air. He followed, letting the power guide him. Slash, strike, slash, it was a dance he could do in his sleep, one that was patterned into his very blood. The relentless attack continued, the power building until he could hold it no more. He sent it to the edge of his blade where it pulsed intensely, blinding those who watched. He timed his last strike just as Valora closed her eyes, slashing his blade diagonally across her abdomen.

Blood gushed as she fell. Her intestines spilled out, the stench of blood and bile mixing horrendously with the overpowering smell of wildflowers. Her last breath rattled in her chest, and Squall leapt back, his magic spent.

He collapsed, his own blood flowing, staining the dirt around him. He heard Quistis' panicked scream and saw Tobias' worried eyes before all went black.

-oooOooo-

Light…

She felt light… free… unhindered.

It was… liberating, and yet, in some indescribable way, daunting.

She knew it should not be and once she knew that, reality harshly invaded.

Her body felt heavy, her movements clumsy like those of a newborn babe. Her vision was grayed, the colors of the world skewed. She was in the field—Elysia, Anne had called it—but it wasn't the same as it had been before she'd used a Sorceresses' last resort. The Final Strike.

She was dead. She knew this inexplicably, but she could still _feel_ and she hadn't expected Death to feel so… empty.

The answer came to her as a memory whispering across her mind… _'doomed to walk the world as wraiths neither living nor dead, unable to live, unable to die until we pass our power…'_ Edea had said something like that once, the story told from Sorceress to Sorceress.

She was the undead.

And she was in Elysia, stuck. Would probably be stuck for an eternity. Alone… empty.

Her own personal hell.

_Hyne, Council, angels... if anyone can hear me, please, at least send me back to Gaea._

"The Council has no authority here." The voice had the pitch of a perfect soprano, the lilt, honey and rain.

"I'm sorry," Nichole said, "they brought me here… well, not here exactly, but to Elysia."

"Yes," the voice agreed, "they did, but you are no longer in Elysia. You are on Gaea, in the place most representing the paradise of the dead."

"How did I get here?" she asked. She wondered where here was, looking all around her.

_Oh…_ she thought as she saw the stone rising above the wildflowers, _the orphanage_.

"The orphanage," the voice agreed. "A place built by those who came before you, a place used most recently by Destiny's child."

"My grandbaby?" another voice asked, this one deep as an endless well, sweet as the coolest waters.

"Yes, Eternity, you have missed much while you have been away."

_Hyne…_ oh shit, she was talking with Hyne!

"My daughter," Hyne acknowledged, her voice taking on a laughing tone, "no need to be so reverent, or so fearful. As to your earlier question, you were sent here when your body could no longer support your soul. Elysia is a place for the dead, a place that your kind have been forbidden to see until you give up what you covet most—my gift. The _Council_"—she spat the word, her voice turning as sharp as glass—"exceeded their authority by taking you to that place."

"I'm sorry," Nichole said.

Hyne appeared to her in a flash of light. She was perfection incarnate, her long silver hair trailing over and around perfect curves to lightly brush the earth beneath her bare feet. Her face was flawless, her features neither too sharp nor too soft. Her eyes were the color of an endless blue sky, her lips the perfect pink of a budding rose. She wore a light blue dress that hugged her breasts and flared out over her hips.

Another woman appeared next to her, this one as timeless as the stone, her hair a brilliant white, her eyes the deepest black. Her face was beautiful, but in a different way than Hyne's, her features almost too sharp. She was wrapped in what looked to be white leather; it covered her from head to toe. A white cape fluttered gently behind her in the breeze. Eternity, Nichole thought, this must be Eternity.

"You are quite unlike the others," Hyne said, her eyes assessing Nichole, "for all that you are Chaos, you are not. You are my daughter, but you are not. What are you?"

Nichole shook her head. She didn't understand the question. "I am myself." Flawed, oh so flawed, and raw, and hurting, but always herself.

"I see," Hyne said.

"She has potential," Eternity said. "I like her."

Hyne took her eyes from Nichole, turning them to Eternity and Nichole took in a breath. Although she couldn't _really_ breathe the motion comforted her.

"Your Pinnacle loves her," Hyne informed the Guardian, "he grieves for her so. I can hear it on the wind, feel it in the air. Life calls for her, seeks her."

"He has good taste," Eternity commented. "Would you let him find her?"

"I don't know," Hyne admitted. "He is powerful, and he is blinded by his love. He will try to tie her to him."

"Let him. Valora is Chaos once more, the void has been filled. Why not let him have the girl?"

"Valora's die has not yet been cast. Destiny's chosen fights her as we speak, even I do not know who will win."

Nichole shook her head. Only half of what they said made any sense. She knew they were talking of Adrian, of him grieving for her, but tie her to him? What was that about? And Destiny's chosen was Squall… was he fighting Valora? Had her attempt to make her mortal succeeded?

Hyne turned her eyes back to Nichole. "You are a wraith, neither living nor dead," Hyne explained. "Death has made a pact with me that it will not touch you, but Life never made such claim. If your love finds you, he may try to circumvent the curse by binding you to him. His tower would be the only thing sustaining your soul; it would drain it and him, weakening him. It is an option, as Eternity suggests, but not one I would undertake lightly.

"This… 'Squall' as you say, is fighting Valora, yes, and the towers are helping as they can. Your effort to take Valora's immortality succeeded; she is fighting for her very life. It is why Eternity and I have not returned. Once Eternity sets foot on the High Plane she will be bound as the others are, and will serve her function."

"I thought she was a Guardian," Nichole said.

"Yes," Hyne agreed, "a Guardian, but also much more. Eternity is the keeper of immortality. She was the Creator's last gift to his brothers. She sustains all of the Guardians, the towers, protects them from decay. She will provide the same for any tied to them. Valora has lost her connection to the Creator, the main source of her immortality, but should Eternity return, Valora would once again fall under her power."

"Oh, don't let her fool you," Eternity chimed in. "That's only half the reason; the rest falls under simple curiosity, something even gods fall prey to. She wanted to see her last daughter for herself."

"Eternity!" Hyne scolded.

Eternity rolled her eyes. "Drop the mysterious high and mighty act already, no one really buys into it."

Nichole flinched. She had definitely bought into it.

"Oh, pooh!" Hyne huffed. "Fine! Actually, keeping it up was getting rather tiring. So, Daughter, while we pass the time, what _is _your name?"

"Nichole."

"Ah, good, Nichole then—wait…"

"There it is." Hyne said finally, "The battle has been won. It is time we returned. Take hold of my hand, Nichole. I think this occasion calls for a little bit of rule bending."

Nichole did as she was told, surprised by the warmth of Hyne's hand. The rest of the world was dull, her senses deadened, but Hyne's heat was almost burning in its intensity.

"Hold on," Eternity warned, just before they were sucked into a whirlpool of light.

She blinked at the feeling of dislocation, winced at a strong push against her. The feeling that she just _did not belong_. But she held on, gripping Hyne's burning hand in a vice-like fashion. Suddenly they were in another field, almost a carbon copy of the first.

Valora's body lay amongst the flowers, her insides spilling out around them, her blood bitter and dark against the shocks of white and green. Nichole turned away from the grisly image, feeling rather sorry that Valora—great and terrible as she was—had been reduced to something so base.

To her left she saw Quistis and Tobias, huddled together next to an equally gathered Anne and Gavin. They all watched as Adrian worked on Squall, casting spell after spell into his bleeding body.

Nichole started to run to them but Hyne held her back, refusing to let her hand go.

Finally after what seemed like forever, Squall's breathing evened out, and the blood stopped flowing into the dirt. His eyes fluttered open, a groan spilled from his lips and Nichole knew what it was to cry without tears.

"He will live," Hyne whispered. "Although his wish for Death is great, she cannot touch him in this place. Neither Life nor Death have power here. 'Twas why it took so long; Life was forced to fight the chosen's will with only the magic of humanity, my magic."

"Humanity's magic?"

Hyne smiled. "Human, Sorceress, Guardian, the magic has been accredited to many creatures, but truly it all comes from one source… me. Humans—especially those of the male variety—have a very limited range of magic, but magic they have. When their need is great they can tap into this power, if they know how."

"I see," Nichole said. So that was why those without a junction could cast magic when they were nearing death.

"We shall go to them now," Hyne said.

Nichole shook her head, pulling against her. "No," she whispered harshly, "for all that I am a wraith, I am still dead. I don't want them to see me like this, to give them hope. Please, please…" she begged. "Take back your gift. Allow me to pass over without them ever knowing I was here."

Hyne smiled in delight. "You would give up my gift, my power, to spare them the agony of saying goodbye?"

Nichole nodded. "I would give it up anyway, it is not mine. I would do anything to spare them more pain."

"Your spirit is unprecedented among your kind, daughter of mine. Your sacrifice and your offer make me proud to call you my flesh and blood. I will accept this power, the last of my gift, from you, and in return I will grant you a boon. Here in this place, where Death and Life have no power, where you are neither living nor dead, I give you a choice, which would you be?"

"Living," Nichole breathed. The choice effortless, she had so much to live for.

"So it is done." Hyne touched her lips to Nichole's forehead, and where skin met a skin a light burst forth, growing larger, brighter.

Nichole felt lightheaded as memories poured and power burned. It was a never-ending stream, painful and liberating all at the same time. When it was done, when Nichole felt strangely hollow, Hyne stepped back, smiling. "Go now, greet your loved ones, Pinnacle of Chaos."

She didn't have to be told twice; she ran for them, crossing the expanse in moments.

Gavin was the first to see her, shock, wonder, and joy lighting up his face. He nudged Anne who looked at him questioningly. He tilted his head, smiling as Anne turned to look.

"Oh, Hyne! Oh, oh!" Anne squealed, completely at a loss for words.

Quistis and Tobias followed her gaze as Adrian finally looked up. His face was full of despair until he saw her. A light came into his eyes as he rubbed them, thinking he was seeing things. When she stayed as she was he leapt up, vaulting over a rather confused looking Squall to meet her.

Nichole fell into his arms, tears spilling down her cheeks as he crushed her to him.

"How?" he breathed, his eyes taking in every inch of her face.

She smiled. "Oh, you know me, nothing's impossible."

He laughed, hugging her again before sealing his lips to hers.

"Woo-hoo!" Anne catcalled.

Nichole blushed, pulling away in time to catch a widely grinning and crying Anne.

Nichole wiggled a little, trying to find a comfortable position that wouldn't crush her or Anne's belly as she shot an apologetic look to Adrian. He didn't seem to mind, taking it as par for the course. "Don't ever scare me like that again!" Anne scolded in a voice that sounded more like a wail.

"Agreed," Gavin added from slightly behind her. Anne smiled at him, stepping back so he could take her place.

Once again Nichole felt like she was being crushed, but knowing she wouldn't hurt him she returned the hug with equal fervor. She could feel his tears on her neck, as her own spilled onto his shirt. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

He nodded, "I'm just glad you're back."

"Me too."

He pulled away, allowing Squall to take his place.

"You did it!" she said, hugging him. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

-oooOooo-

"You too," he said a little awkwardly, patting her back. He still wasn't quite sure how he was still alive, let alone how Nichole had come back from the dead. She smiled at him, her eyes telling him more than she could say.

_I understand_, they said, _I hope you find peace, I hope you find happiness._

As Quistis and Tobias took their turns greeting Nichole, Squall retreated some distance away. As much as he was happy that Nichole lived, he couldn't stop wishing that he hadn't.

When his world had faded, he'd found himself in another field of flowers. He'd wondered if it was just another expanse of Elysia, but it felt… different somehow. It took him a few moments to recognize that it was the fields outside of the orphanage. His heart had immediately started pounding—which was odd because he was sure he was dead.

She promised… she'd promised to be waiting there for him.

He felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest when he saw her. Her back was turned to him, the white angel wings stark against her blue sweater. He called to her as the wind picked up and red flower petals swirled around her. She reached out, catching one of them in the palm of her hand. Under her touch it turned into a feather, and she turned, letting it loose into the wind.

He'd woken up then, the others hovering over him. He'd felt like crying, but his eyes refused to produce the tears. She had been within his grasp, he could have reached out and touched her, but once again he lived on, alone.

Nichole coming back, while heartening, was bittersweet. Without Rinoa his victory seemed hollow, pale and unimportant. What did it matter if the world was saved if she would never get to see it, to walk amongst the flowers, to smile at him with that secret smile?

"You have done a great deed for the universe, Destiny's chosen," A woman spoke, coming up behind him. He turned, seeing her beauty, her light, and knew that this could only be Hyne, the Goddess, the Mother of All.

He sighed, wondering if he should bow in her presence. He'd never taken the worship of Hyne very seriously, had accounted it all as religious bullshit, and now, when faced with her presence he had no idea how to act. "It was nothing," he replied finally with a half shrug. He had only done what was necessary, what Rinoa would have wanted him to do.

"Ah, ever so humble, I see." She laughed, and the sound was like bells on the wind. "Destiny chose well this time."

"This time?" he echoed before he could stop himself.

"Oh, yes," she said, "there have been others. When humanity has needed a more… shall we say, 'personal' touch. It is likely that you will not be the last."

She held out her hand. "A hero they shall call you, and a hero you have been. Your triumph for your fellow man has earned you the right to ask a boon."

He placed his gloved hand in hers, surprised at the warmth he felt even through the leather. "I wouldn't know what to ask for," he admitted. He knew what he wanted, but he didn't know if it was possible. Nichole had come back, but…

"I know what you wish for most. I have seen your heart, my child. It beats only for one. What would you give, what would you do, to see her returned to this world?"

"Anything," he breathed, not even stopping to think.

Hyne smiled, her beauty outshining the sun. "Destiny has come to an arrangement with Time. We have agreed to give you this boon—you who have humbled us all. For your world, this will all be as if it never happened. You shall have the fate that would have been yours _without_ outside interference. Be warned though, this boon comes at a high price."

"Will Rinoa be okay?" Squall asked. He didn't care what happened to him as long as Rinoa got the happily ever after she deserved.

"Yes, the girl will be as she was. It will be up to you to keep her that way."

"Then I accept."

Hyne laughed. "You are truly the favored child. When your journey ends you will receive what you've always wanted.

"Wake now."

-oooOooo-

_Balamb Garden, Balamb, April 4, 080 ALC; 11:00 hours_

His head felt like it was on fire; it pounded, pulsing in time with the beating of his heart.

"How are you feeling?"

Dr. Kadowaki? Yes, it was her. His head hurt, his memories seemed a little fuzzy, but otherwise...

"...OK."

Why could he smell wildflowers? A flash of white and blue crossed his mind, and he wondered: How did he know that it was the feathers of angel wings?

"Looks like your eyes are focusing. You should be fine. Say your name for me."

"Squall…"

"Why don't you take it easy in training? Next time you might not be so lucky."

Training… an image of steel on steel filtered through. That was right, he was sparring with Seifer. Ugh, why did he feel like he'd been here, like he'd had this conversation before? It was like a memory within a hazy dream.

"Tell that to Seifer." Seifer who was always underhanded… trying to 'toughen' him up.

Dr. Kadowaki sighed. "That Seifer... Won't listen to anyone. Why don't you ignore him?"

"I can't just run away," he said. He knew that as innately as he knew his own name, although he couldn't say why.

"You wanna be cool, huh? Well, don't get hurt in the process. Let's see, your instructor is... Quistis! I'll call her now. Just wait here a minute." Dr Kadowaki left, crossing to her desk, picking up the phone. "Quistis? Come get your student. Yes, yes... His injury's not serious. It'll probably leave a scar... Right. Now please come by."

He lay back, covering his eyes, wishing that the pounding in his head would go away. An image of a girl with long red hair and yellow eyes flashed into his mind, but before he could think about it, the picture was gone, faded away like it never was.

A woman in a white skirt and blue top snuck into the room adjoining his, bending to peek through the window.

"Squall... so we meet again."


	24. Chapter 24

**Epilogue**

'Cause my laughter, you won't hear, the faster I disappear

_Hyne's Garden, High Plane, August 30, 080 ALC, 19:46 Hours_

"Nichi, stop meddling in his life, you know he's not going to appreciate it," Tobias demanded.

"I'm not meddling." Nichole stuck her tongue out.

Tobias glared. "You're using your influence to manipulate him into taking options that he would have previously disregarded."

"Huh?"

"You're causing him to do things he wouldn't do," Quistis translated.

"Ohhh…" Nichole smiled, wondering when Quistis would catch on that she feigned ignorance just to annoy her bother. "Nope, well, maybe just a bit, but I'm not putting the thoughts in his head, I just give him the oomph to make them reality."

"So he must have been thinking 'what would Zell do' when he ordered everyone to guard the hotdogs in the middle of the battle with Galbadia today." Quistis chortled. _"Cafeteria team, collect all the hot dogs and store everything in the secret shelter. Don't leave anything for the enemy." _

"Ha-ha, I _know_, right! I figured Zell would get a kick outta it," Nichole said.

"You're terrible," Tobias accused. "I almost hope he remembers us after time compression re-aligns the world, if only to tell him what you made him do."

"Hyne, Red, you're such a killjoy," said Anne. "How do you live with him, Quisty? I bet he times you in bed. _'You have exactly thirty seconds before this activity is over_.'"

"Anne!" Nichole choked.

Quistis hid a smile, while Tobias sputtered in indignation.

Anne smiled. "Why are you gathered around here, anyway? Don't you have jobs or something?"

"Griever and Eris are at it again. He's powerless right now—since Squall has to wear the amulet to keep the timeline consistent—and that makes him grumpy—"

"—I've always wondered how Ultimecia possessed the Griever we fought during time compression." Quistis interrupted.

"That Griever wasn't the real Griever," Nichole explained. "It was a very good copy that Ultimecia pulled from Squall's idea of the 'strongest GF.' Of course his idea was implanted by basically wearing Griever's power for that long. So I guess the Griever you fought was a kind of copy, like the one of you that's down on Gaea now."

"Well that explains it." Quistis said. "And that's actually what I was doing; checking my copy," she added, "not that Squall paid much attention to me anyway, but I try to keep tabs on what she's doing."

"Don't you find it just a wee bit creepy, having some doppelganger living your life?" Anne asked.

"It's not a doppelganger," Tobias corrected, "it's a physical manifestation of a piece of her soul. It's the same kind of magic that allows you to be standing there while your 'soul' is out leading people to their Deaths."

"Maybe, but my soul appears as a wraith, hers is flesh and blood. You can't tell me that it doesn't faze you that she's down there right now mooning over your cousin," Anne commented.

"I did not 'moon' over anyone, and my copy is currently tucked away in my old dorm, riding out the aftermath of Rinoa's sudden catatonic spell from taking Edea's powers."

"I still don't get that," Tobias mumbled. "Hyne took her power back, how the hell is it still there?"

"Time paradox," Nichole piped up. "When time compression happens, Hyne is going to merge the lines back together and Rinoa will get her most fervent wish; to be rid of her Sorceress powers."

"Won't that undo Ultimecia?" Quistis asked.

Nichole shrugged. "My best guess… yes and no. She exists, but destroys herself in the past and therefore cannot exist; she herself is a contradiction. I would say that the future she comes from no longer exists on this timeline."

"Confusing enough?" Anne grinned.

"Not at all," Quistis agreed.

"Where's your baby, by the way?" Nichole asked Anne, changing the subject. "I haven't seen in her in days!"

"Gavin has her," Anne informed her, "and speaking of her, you need to help me come up with a name."

"What? You decided you don't like Leona?" Quistis asked.

Nichole snickered. Anne, still on a high over their victory, went into labor exactly ten hours after Valora met her end. The sentimentality of pregnancy, the ultimate joy of holding her new baby girl, and their recent triumph somehow had her convinced that the baby's name should be Leona, in honor of Squall and the family name that had brought all of them together. Each of them had tried to talk her out of it, but she had been so certain.

"I think she likes her name," Nichole claimed.

"Well, I don't," Anne stated. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"It was an in the moment thing," Tobias remarked. "I thought you were keeping it because Gavin liked it."

Anne shook her head. "She doesn't need anything else from her daddy. She takes after him enough. I swear she got the destruction gene. Already she's destroyed my figure, my breasts, my beauty sleep, and is doing her best to take my sanity too, because I wouldn't trade her for anything."

"Aww…" Nichole chimed in. "I want one."

Anne laughed. "You can borrow mine, only slightly used; she'll keep you buried in all sorts of bodily fluids."

"No, thank you," said Adrian, coming into the courtyard.

"But Leona loves her uncle Adrian…" Nichole pleaded, "We could take her for a night, let the newlyweds have a little honeymoon."

She really did like the baby, and since having one of her own was impossible—even Adrian couldn't heal what was no longer there—she'd have to live vicariously as 'Auntie Nichi' and hope that Tobias and Quistis got with the program. Adrian's eyes softened, and Nichole knew he was thinking the same thing, at least about living vicariously; he probably could care less if there were more of the little buggers around. She just hoped he would never be disappointed that she couldn't give him one.

"Fine," he agreed reluctantly, "but only one night."

Anne smiled, meeting Quistis' eyes. Everything was coming together, and the best part was: this was only the beginning.

* * *

AN: Well, that's all she wrote. The adventures of the hybrids have come to and end, and Squall continues in the life he should have had. Thanks for your time.

Disclaimer: Squaresoft (SquareEnix or whatever they call themselves now) holds all rights to the original characters and world of Final Fantasy 8. Vertical Horizon owns the song that was chopped up and used as title lines for the chapters. I own nothing but the figments of my imagination.


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